


Roadtrip of DOOM

by Marijke_Rose



Series: Invader Zim - The Nightmare is Real Series [1]
Category: Invader Zim
Genre: After effects of Rape, Irken!Dib, M/M, PTSD, RaPr, Reference to Rape, ZADF, ZaDr
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-09
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2019-07-10 07:04:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 31
Words: 105,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15944237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marijke_Rose/pseuds/Marijke_Rose
Summary: Set after the series and does not take "Enter the Florpus" into account, because it wasn't released at the time I started writing this (and, as of Oct 20th, 2018, still hasn't been).Dib has spent the last three years abroad in 'Boarding Skool' and when he comes home for a summer break to visit his family, he is eager to find out what his rival, the Irken Invader, Zim, has been up to. Why hasn't Zim at least managed to take over the town, if not the entire Earth without Dib there to stop him?  Dib must find out!Both have surprising secrets to share.Note: It is, in any case, going to become Zim and Dib Friendship, but very likely will include ZaDR.Also, I do feel it's probably best if I just give the heads up that this IS a transformed Dib (Irken!Dib) story.That way if you DON'T like it, you know not to waste your time reading my story.But If you DO like it, you now know my story's got it!Another thing: It contains mention of rape after chapter 13, and the PTSD that comes with being a survivor, so this is an important trigger warning, because I don't want anyone to end up hurt by it.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> UPDATE - Oct 16, 2018 -- Yes, the title has been changed. "The Nightmare is Real" was actually only intended as a working title and moreso the series title. Now that I know I will be doing a sequel to this for NaNoWriMo this year, it was time to change it. So it's actually good news?
> 
> Don't worry, nothing else has been changed. The content is all still the same.
> 
> Sorry if this has thrown anyone off.

 

 

# Prologue of Doom

  
  


To his surprise, the world _hadn't_ been conquered when he had been sent away; and he was sitting quite literally on the edge of his seat in the bus as he made his way home, staring out the window and so very eager to find out why.  
  
Had the invader from a far off planet been captured finally? Angered by the idea of someone else exposing his arch-enemy, he clenched his fist. That pleasure should be his and his alone!  
  
He shut his eyes and willed the bus to go faster.  
  
“It isn't going to work, you know,” his companion spoke up from her game.  
  
His eyes snapped open. “What isn't?” he asked innocently.  
  
“He’s probably just returned to his planet.. or _died_ ,” she said the last part darkly.  
  
“Gaz!” he gasped with a start. Then got ahold of himself and tried more calmly. “You really think so?” he straightened his glasses out on his nose.  


She rolled her eyes and returned to her game in a manner that said better than any words could have, that she was done discussing it.

 

He sighed and gave up, turning back to stare out the window. As they got closer to their hometown, Dib half-expected to see signs of devastation or… _something_ to reveal his nemesis had been busy while he was gone.

 

As hope is always the last to die, he remained so for the duration of their ride, eventually trying not to doze off.

  


***

  


Walking in the door to their home, there was no greeting committee, not even someone to help them carry in their luggage.

 

“Dad?” Gaz called once, then huffed and grabbed her bags, storming off to her room to unpack.

 

Picking up his, he followed after, though headed to his room. He didn't take the time to unpack, however, and left the room as soon as he's dropped his bags. By the time he was back out the front door, he kicked it up into a sprint.

  


***

  


He stopped and gaped for a moment, hardly able to believe his eyes: Zim’s house was still there! And looked as twisted as always, with the creepy lawn gnomes just as he’d remembered.

 

He shuddered, realising that in his haste, he had not come up with a plan to infiltrate his enemy’s base. A fatal thing, should all systems be functional.

 

He pondered how best to proceed now, wanting more than anything else just to see what state the alien was in.

 

He didn't have many options, nor did he want to waste time to gather supplies for something elaborate, so he raised his hands and began shouting.

 

“ZIM?? - I KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE! - I’M BACK - SO YOU BETTER COME OUT BEFORE I COME IN THERE AND GET YOU!”

 

He hoped his commotion worked and bit his lip waiting. He also hoped he’d survive the alien’s wrath if it did.

 

Silence met him, not even the lawn gnomes reacted.

 

“I MEAN IT, ZIM! DON’T MAKE ME COME IN THERE!”

 

Still nothing.

 

“WELL, YOU ASKED FOR IT, I’M COMING IN NOW!”

 

He approached the property, hesitating at the edge, then stepped onto the lawn.

 

“ZIM!?”

 

Then everything came to life: The ground began to shake as the front door flew open, smoke gushing out. In the midst, a shadow appeared, shaped like his enemy. Then it grew larger and larger as it approached.

 

“STINKING HYOOMAN INTRUDER! BEGONE WITH YOU OR FEEL THE TERRIBLE WRATH OF _ZIM!!!_ ”

 

As the smoke cleared, there stood his rival, towering above him on his spider legs.

  
  


***


	2. Chapter 1

# Chapter 1

  


An undisguised Zim promptly closed the distance between them, causing Dib to stumble over backwards with a startled shriek and hit the ground. “DON'T KILL ME!” He cringed, shielding himself with his arms. Coming over here without a plan had indeed been a HUGE mistake!

 

“Dib? Is that you, Dib?!” the alien demanded, standing over him.

 

“Y-yes?” he squeaked, daring to peak out at the alien.

 

Zim strutted a circle around him on his spider legs then came to stand before him again. “Hmmm…” he murmured suspiciously.

 

Dib lowered his arms and looked up. “What?” And realising he was indeed still alive and unharmed, he quickly scrambled to his feet.

 

Instead of making an attack, Zim simply scrutinized him up and down. “You look… different.”

 

“I-I do?”

 

One of the spider legs raised up and pointed at him. “You’re… taller.” Zim thwapped him on the top of his head with said appendage.

 

“Ow!” Dib cried, rubbing his head and glaring up at him. “Well, humans grow up, you know!”

 

“Yes, yes, yes…” Zim muttered and scratched his chin, then lowered himself to his real feet, spider legs still extended threateningly, and looked up at the human. “I didn't think YOU would, though.” Then he waved his hand dismissively. “But your head’s still too big.”

 

“Hey!” Dib glared back down at the alien. “Well, YOUR BODY’S still too small!” he countered childishly.

 

A look of hurt, so fleeting that Dib thought he’d only imagined it, passed over his rival’s face before Zim swiftly raised himself back up on his spider legs and right into Dib’s face.

 

“Am I, _DIB?!_ ” he snapped, glaring imposingly down at him.

 

“Er, well… yeah,” Dib insisted despite his rival’s posturing, then squared his shoulders and glared up. “Now what are you planning, Zim?”

 

“Eh?! Planning?”

 

“I know you’re trying to _distract_ me, but I can still see right through you!”

 

“I am?” Zim blinked, then brightened up notably. “OH! OH YES! YES, I AM! AND WHAT _TERRIBLE_ THINGS I AM PLANNING TO DO TO Y- OOF!”

 

Zim suddenly fell to the ground as a robot came dashing up at full speed and tackled Dib.

 

“Dibhead!” it shrieked in delight.

 

“Wha-GIR!” Zim snapped furiously, pulling himself to a sitting position on the ground. “HOW DARE YOU KNOCK ZIM OVER!” He shook his fist.

 

GIR, however, ignored him and waved a taco in Dib’s face. “WANNATACO?”

 

Dib groaned, trying to catch his breath after having the wind knocked out of him, then shook his head, not daring to move otherwise lest he send the SIR into attack mode.

 

Zim stomped over to his rescue. “Get off him, GIR!”

 

“Ooo-kaaaay!” it squealed and did as it was told, then held the taco up to Zim. “Dooo yoooou wanna taco, Master?”

 

“Wha- NOOO, GIR! Get that nasty hyooman food away from Zim NOW! - Did you forget the plan?!”

 

“Yep!” The robot complied by gobbling up the taco and prancing back inside.

 

Dib took the moment to sit up and shake his head. “I’m alive?” he asked no one in particular. Then began to get to his feet only to freeze in shock upon seeing Zim, again on his spider legs, holding out his hand to him. “NO, DON'T TOUCH ME!”

 

Zim glared. “So, it’s true you hyoomens get more stupid as you grow.”

 

“What?”

 

“I’m offering you my _hand_ , Dib.” He waved it pointedly before the human.

 

Dib shrunk back warily. “What are you up to?”

 

“Then get up by _yourself_ ,” the alien spat and turned away, heading back towards his house.

 

Dib scrambled to his feet and chased after him. “Zim! You won’t get away with this! Whatever you’re plotting, I will stop you!”

 

Zim, however, dropped back to his real feet, spider legs retreating into his PAK, and shrugged as he made his way up to his front door.

 

Dib caught up to him, then skid to a halt as Zim whirled around to face him. At this proximity, he could tell he’d been wrong earlier about the alien’s size, for Zim had indeed grown, the top of his head reaching nearly up to his chest now and he gaped.

 

“Just you _try_ and stop my _ingenius_ plan!” Zim growled up at him in challenge.

 

Snapping out of it, he glared back. “You bet I will, Zim!”

 

Then the alien turned on his heel and marched inside his house.

 

“Hey!” Dib shouted after him.

 

“I’m afraid, Hyooman, that you won’t be able to stop Zim from _out there!_ ” he announced over his shoulder.

 

Dib gulped, afraid of walking into a trap, and hesitated in the doorway. However, his self-proclaimed duty to defend humankind from the alien’s dangerous clutches got the better of him and he proceeded cautiously.

 

Barely inside, he tripped over something in the hallway and, upon closer inspection, blinked at his discovery. “Smoke machines?” Why would Zim set up smoke machines before his door? This was new.

 

Rubbing his ankle, he got up and followed Zim into his living room, coming to a dead halt when Zim plopped nonchalantly down on the couch. “What the..??”

 

“I’m hungry,” Zim replied matter-of-factly as he reached out to a plate of sweets set on the coffee table and picked up a donut, placing it on a small plate in front of him. “You can join me, if you like.” He gestured to the couch beside him.

 

That was when Dib noticed a second plate and two glasses. He gaped at his nemesis.

 

“I figured you’d be starving after your trip.”

 

“M-my trip?” he repeated dumbfounded.

 

Zim looked up and fixed him with an annoyed glare. “Did you really think I _didn't_ know you were _coming home_ today?”

 

“I…” he stammered. “How did you know that?”

 

“Zim has ways!” the alien announced, again gesturing to the couch. “So, are you going to sit down and eat already or starve?”

 

Thrown completely off guard, Dib gasped. “Wha- I-I’m not _hungry_ , Zim!”

 

“Don’t be a fool! I can HEAR your yucky hyooman stomach staging a _mutiny_ RIGHT NOW!”

 

Dib started to shake his head, then blinked and snapped his fingers as realisation dawned on him. “I must have fallen asleep on the bus and this is all just a weird dream and that’s why you’re acting so… not you!” Dib decided firmly. It was the only way he could make sense of it. “Quick! Pinch me so I’ll wake up!”

 

“Does that ever actually work?” Zim retorted, picking up his donut and took a bite.

 

Dib pinched himself, but nothing happened. “No…” he sighed, settling himself down on the couch in defeat as his stomach growled. “I really hope Gaz wakes me soon,” he mumbled as he picked up a donut.

  


Zim ignored him for a few bites before breaking the silence. “You’ve lost your touch, Dib-beast.”

 

Dib almost choked on his donut and sputtered. “I have not! - YOU'VE lost YOUR touch!”

 

“How _dare_ you approach the base of the HEINOUS _ZIM_ unarmed?!”

 

“Well… this is _my_ dream!”

 

Zim turned to him. “Or did you think that just because you’re TALLER now, that I’m no longer a _threat?_ ”

 

“Uh…”

 

Zim jumped up on the couch so he was taller than the human and glared down at him. “Did you think you OUTRANK ME now!?”

 

Dib had to crane his neck to make eye contact with the furious alien. “Out-outrank you??”

 

He then gulped as Zim took the collar of his shirt in his fist.

 

“I AM ZIM, STINKBEAST!” he snarled viciously. “And if I wanted to, I could finish you right here on this very spot!” To emphases this, two spider legs came out of his PAK, their sharp points coming to linger mere centimetres from Dib’s face. “NOW… WHY DID YOU LEAVE!??” he roared.

 

Dib’s heart pounded furiously in his chest and he barely dared to breathe. “L-leave?” he stuttered out, eyeing the spider legs fearfully.

 

“YES!” Zim shrieked, then his entire posture suddenly deflated and his spider legs retreated inside his PAK. “...W-why did you... go away, Dib?” he asked in a weak voice.

 

“I-I didn't…”

 

Zim instantly bristled and glared at him, poking a finger into his chest. “Listen, Hyooman, _three of your Earth years ago_ , you suddenly _quit_ trying to thwart my plots and then the Skool’s files said you moved away! - WHY DID YOU _DO_ THAT!?” His chest heaving dramatically.

 

“Why do you _care?!_ ” Dib cried back, feeling more puzzled and afraid with each word the alien uttered.

 

Zim’s glare darkened further and, with a hiss, he backed away and sat back down on the couch. “You are a _filthy traitor_ , abandoned your planet…” he muttered just barely loud enough for Dib to hear.

 

“Well…”

 

“You were your people’s one and only line of defence against CERTAIN DOOM, Dib-traitor!”

 

“THEN HOW COME IT’S _STILL HERE_ , ZIM!?!” Fed up, Dib took his turn to scream accusations at the other. “If Earth is SOOOO HELPLESS without me, then how come you haven't even managed to take over THIS TOWN - HUH, _ZIM!?_ HUH? HUH?? _HUH?!?_ ”

 

Zim’s antennae and posture fell again, his gaze pointed down at his plate and he placed his hands in his lap without a word.

 

“Zim?” Dib tentatively prodded him after a minute or two.

 

Still silent, the alien’s shoulders began to tremble. Not heavily and Dib would easily have overseen it had he not already been staring intently at him.

 

“A-are you... _crying?_ ”

 

“Why did you leave, Dib?” Zim repeated in a forlorn whisper.

 

Dib sighed, not sure whether he wanted to tell his enemy, but Zim’s state caught him off guard and he was starting to feel rather guilty. “Well… I… I didn't _want_ to leave… - They sent me away to boarding skool…”

 

The alien turned, looking up at him, revealing his ruby eyes to be dry. “‘Bore-ding skool’?” he repeated questioningly. “What’s ‘bore-ding skool’?”

 

It was Dib’s turn to look down at his hands and start fidgeting. “It’s where they send you when they think you’re crazy for… for being obsessed with your vegetarian schoolmate with a skin condition being an alien and trying to take over the world,” he explained in terms he figured Zim would understand, besides it was how he felt. “...Something like that anyway.”

 

“Stupid, filthy, stinking hyoomans,” Zim cursed through grit teeth.

 

“So, I told you mine, now it’s your turn. Why didn't you and your people take over the Earth while I was away?”

 

Zim turned away again, cringing more than before and wrapping his arms around himself. “...Zim is… defective…”

 

“Defective?” Dib repeated, having barely caught the last word. “You’re _defective?_ ”

 

“It’s what they say when you… when you’re tiny and break everything you touch, except for the things you’re _supposed_ to break. When even a worm-baby of an inferior species thwarts all your grand schemes of planetary conquest.” He paused, taking a breath, then added in a quieter tone. “...And they may believe you’re responsible for the deaths of not one but two Almighty Tallests - the highest ranking members of your race… like Earth’s king of hotdogs, just taller and not so greasy,” he added in terms he apparently believed Dib could understand.

 

“Oh…”

 

Zim reached out for another donut, picking it up and playing with it, then he tore it in half. “When you weren't there trying to beat me anymore, there was no fun in trying to complete my stupid ‘ _mission_ ’ anymore.” Looking at his work for a second, he dropped the now mooshed mess of donut onto his plate. “Just no point in it, anymore.”

 

Looking at the mangled donut, Dib sighed heavily. “Guess our species think we’re _both_ just big losers.”

 

Zim nodded. “Mightiest loozers…”

 

The two fell silent, each contemplating their respectively miserable lives.

 

“Zim?”

 

“Mmm?”

 

“...I’m _not_ dreaming, am I?”

 

“The nightmare is real, Dib.”

  
  
  


***


	3. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one gets the plot going. :-D

#  Chapter 2

  
  


Back home, Dib went inside and to the kitchen to get a glass of milk with a mind to take it to his room. As he was retrieving it from the fridge, Gaz came in.

 

“Did you find him?”

 

Retrieving a glass from the cupboard, Dib nodded. “Yeah…” he admitted, turning his gaze to the ground in fear his eyes would reveal too much. “...He’s ok.” He opened the carton and began to pour it.

 

“Whatever. Dad is furious that you didn't call whim when you got home.”

 

“Oh! I forgot all about that!” he gasped, almost spilling the milk on himself.

 

“Which is precisely why you were sent away in the first place, remember?”

 

Dib’s shoulders fell and he sighed, setting the carton safely down. “Yes, Gaz… I know…”

 

“So you might want to be careful if you ever want to come home again.”

 

As he nodded, she walked away, leaving him there alone with his milk and his thoughts.

 

He sighed and went up to a floating screen, pressing a button to contact their father.

 

“Hi, Dad,” he said when Professor Membrane’s image flickered on screen.

 

“Oh, hi there, Son! Where were you earlier?”

 

“Uh… unpacking?” he lied. He knew he couldn't tell his father the truth about going to Zim’s before even unpacking, lest he be sent back post haste.

 

“That’s good. Well I've got to be going! Science calls! - WHAT ARE YOU DOING??? DON’T TOUCH-”

 

The screen went black before Dib could even say farewell.

 

He drank his milk and set the glass on the sink, then headed upstairs to his room. There, he opened the door and his mouth fell open for there was a disguised Zim sitting on his bed!

 

“Zim??” he cried, then covered his mouth and glanced down the hall. He slipped inside and closed the door. “What’re you doing here? If anyone sees you…”

 

Zim waved a hand dismissively. “What? You’re not allowed to have a friend over?”

 

“Well… - Wait… How did you get in here anyway?”

 

Zim indicated the window and Dib ran over to it to look out.

 

“What about our security?”

 

Zim gave him a look as though he was crazy. “When have I ever had a problem getting past your security?”

 

“ _ Touché _ … So, what do you want?”

 

“To see you,” the irken replied softly.

 

Dib’s mouth fell open. “To see me? Why?”

 

Instead of answering, the irken stood up and walked around the room, inspecting it, then picked up a ‘little green men’ figure from the desk. “Wow, um… obsess much, Dib?”

 

“No!” he snapped defensively. “What is  _ that _ supposed to mean?”

 

Zim put it back down. “I dunno, just thinking…” he scratched his chin and resumed looking around. He stopped to point at a poster with an egg and large text saying ‘aLiEn’.

 

Dib looked down. “Well, it was a cool movie, and makes so much sense. - That wasn't your race, was it?”

 

Zim stared at him, lowering his hand. “Maybe.” Then moved on over to the next thing that his caught his eye, which read, ‘Area 51: Myth or Reality?’ with a saucer. He paused for a second at that one.

 

Embarrassed, Dib walked up and tried to put on a smile. “That doesn't look like an irken ship, does it?”

 

“No,” Zim answered direly. “As if the irken empire would use such primitive technology!” he spat, then marched on to the next thing.

 

Dib followed behind him. “Well, it was kind of a thing here back then… Still is. - If it wasn't your people, then who was it?”

 

“Who was what?”

 

“The saucers that landed here.”

 

Zim looked straight at him confused. “How should I know?”

 

Dib almost flipped. “But you have to! You're out there! You know everything that’s going on out there! Obviously you'd know what’s going on!”

 

Zim listened and then shrugged. “Nope. Earth was out in the wilderness, as you hyoomans say, until I was set with the mission to conquer it.”

 

“Oh… But maybe your people sent like probes or something?”

 

“No, Dib, we haven't.” Then Zim glared at him. “We didn't even know the planet existed until I landed here. There’s no other life in your solar system that could possibly be a threat to  _ us _ .”

 

“Ok… Well,  _ something _ was found back then, but the government is keeping it a secret; so what  _ is _ in Area 51?”

 

“Not MY ship. Probably you stupid hyoomans and your balloons!”

 

Dib didn't like that answer. “Oh come on, Zim! We both know that’s not true! Something has got to be there!”

 

“Then why don't you go find out?”

 

Dib stopped and then grinned at Zim. “Only if you come with me!”

 

Zim paused and shook his head. “How do you expect to do that? Aren't you grounded?”

 

“Nope,” Dib half lied. He wasn't grounded, he just had to go back to boarding skool after break. “Let’s go! You have a spaceship, don't you?”

 

“Why should  _ I _ go with you?”

 

Dib looked down… “Well, maybe it has an irken ship or something, maybe it's got one of your people and they're torturing them for science!”

 

Zim rolled his eyes.

 

“Maybe because some other big alien race landed here and is about to come and claim Earth for themselves!”

 

“Really, Dib?”

 

“Ok… well, if there is something there and it’s from your race, you could be exposed if it ever gets revealed.. and then it won't even matter what I have to say.”

 

“Wasn't there a show about that, that GIR watches?” Zim thought aloud.

 

“Fine, then don't!” Dib snapped. “I’ll go myself with Tak’s ship!” He headed towards the door. “You can just stay here alone!” He left the room.

 

Once outside, he stopped in his tracks as the irken dropped down in front of him on his spider legs.

 

“I will take you - in  _ my _ ship - but you have to make sure no one knows about me when we get there!”

 

“Agreed!” He held his hand out to shake it, Zim hesitantly took it, then shook it hard. “Ow!” Dib cried at the surprisingly strong handshake of his nemesis.

 

“Come.” Zim released him and marched off.

 

“Wait, I have to tell my family where I’m…” he paused realising he had no good story. “...not going. - Ok.. I’m coming!” He hurried after Zim.

  
  
  


***


	4. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a bit of time out for some fun before they resume their journey.
> 
> I hope you've all enjoyed this so far.

# Chapter 3

 

Back at Zim’s base, the irken was busy gathering items and putting them into a compartment in his spaceship, then he hopped into the pilot’s seat and turned it on, running a systems check. He glanced down at the human. “Come on, Dib, this was _your_ idea. Get in here!”

 

“Ok, ok, ok,” Dib nodded and crawled inside next to Zim. “Ugh… I forgot how _small_ this thing is…” he grumbled as he tried to get comfortable.

 

“Quit complaining.”

 

“Zim, how are we going to disguise this thing?”

 

Zim‘s fingers deftly flew over the controls as he started the engines causing the ship to raise up off the ground.

 

“Zim, come on! We don't want to get shot down or start any UFO sightings!”

 

On a display, the words ‘Activate Safety Field Y/N?’.

 

“Yes, Computer. For driver and passenger,” Zim instructed, then he glanced at the human. “You worry too much. As long as we follow your traffic laws, your people will all think this is just a customised Earth vehicle.”

 

“Oh,” Dib blinked. He settled in, trying again to get comfortable.

 

Zim touched another control and GIR’s face came up on a screen. “GIR, while the Dib-beast and I are gone, you’re in charge of the base.”

 

“WOOHOO! I’m gonna party like a monkey!”

 

“No _parties,_  GIR!” Zim growled.

 

“Okeeeee!” The robot saluted.

 

“Goodbye, GIR.”

 

“Goodbye, Master!”

 

“I mean it, GIR: No parties in the base!” Zim then cut the transmission. “Ready to fly, Earthboy?”

 

Dib nodded. “Yeah.”

 

The door opened and Zim piloted the Voot Runner out. When it closed behind them, it appeared to be nothing more than a normal garage.

 

Dib watched in silence as Zim piloted onto the street and onwards, in the direction of the freeway. The irken proceeded to navigate through the streets just like any car, though Dib was fully aware of the uncanny sensation of floating the whole time.

 

Then he thought of something and gasped. “Do you even know where Area 51 is?” he asked suddenly.

 

Zim touched a few controls and a holographic map laid out across the screen, it displayed directions like a Navi.

 

“Oh! That’ll do, I guess.” He then slowly exhaled as he again tried to find a comfortable way to sit in the small spaceship.

 

Once they got the freeway, Dib found himself nodding off despite the cramped conditions.

  


***

  


“AH!” Dib awakened suddenly with a start, wiping his mouth of drool as he attempted to get his bearings. He straightened out his glasses.

 

“Sleep well, Dib?” Zim's voice teased.

 

He looked over at his companion and his memories came back to him. “Um, yeah… s-sorry…” He yawned and stretched as much as the tiny vessel would permit. “C-can we stop somewhere? Like a reststop or something?”

 

“We still have a long way to go,” the irken protested, removing his wig so he could stretch his antennae.

 

“Please, Zim!” Dib whined, his bladder protesting now as well. “I have to! I need to stretch my legs and.. well, I’ve gotta GO! - Please, please, _please,_  Zim!”

 

The irken smirked at him. “Yes! Beg to Zim, little hyooman worm-baby! BEG TO ZIM FOR MERCY!” He pumped a fist for emphasis.

 

Dib caught himself and glared at him. “Damnit, Zim! Just find a place to stop, please! With a bathroom!”

 

Snickering evilly to himself, Zim reached up and tapped on the holo map, swiping it with his finger, then tapped a spot and words in irken script popped up on screen. “There appears to be a truckstop in two earth miles.”

 

“That’s perfect!”

 

“Ok,” Zim sighed and keyed it in, then put his hands behind his head and laid back against the cushion, letting the ship's auto-pilot do it's job.

  


***

  


As soon as Zim had parked the Runner and popped the top, Dib scrambled out, nearly falling on his face in his haste. Once he had a stable foot on the ground, he gave a couple quick stretches, then hurried off to the bathroom with Zim following after.

 

Inside, there was a small shop and restaurant attached, but Dib made straight away for the bathrooms leaving Zim to wait for him.

 

When he returned, Zim was bent over inspecting some maps near the register.

 

“Zim, say, wanna grab something to eat while we’re here?” he suggested as he looked at the booths in the restaurant section, not wanting to get back into the Voot Runner just yet.

 

The disguised irken looked up at Dib, then over to the restaurant, shuddering at the sight of the customers eating. “If you want…”

 

“Yeah. I’m hungry,” he told him, then lead Zim inside, searching for a secluded table away from the other guests. When he found one, they slid into the booth benches opposite each other.

 

Shortly, a waitress came up with menus, which she sat down before them, then took out her pen and notebook. “What can I get you two darlings to drink?”

 

Dib looked worriedly over at Zim who had picked up a menu. “Uhhh…”

 

“I will have a large hot chocolate special with extra whipped cream,” the irken informed her confidently, looking up from his menu. “Please and thank you.”

 

“One hot chocolate the works extra whip,” the waitress murmured as she wrote. “And you?”

 

“Uh… make that two, I guess.”

 

“Of course, Sweetie.” Then she left to fill their orders.

 

Dib turned to his companion. “The hot chocolate won't bother you?” he asked, remembering Zim’s aversion to human food.

 

Zim shook his head. “Zim can drink that.” Then he lowered his gaze back to his menu.

 

Dib picked up his own and opened it, looking through the various items in search of something that sounded good and idly wondering if Zim would actually pick out anything.

 

When the waitress returned and placed their drinks before them, Zim laid his menu down. “Zim is ready to order,” he announced.

 

Dib gave a start. “Y-you _are??”_

 

Zim nodded.

 

“You're going to eat _food?? ”_

 

“Yes, Dib,” the irken said with a huff as though it was obvious.

 

“Wow,” Dib couldn't help himself.

 

The waitress suddenly cleared her throat causing Dib, who’d completely forgotten she was still standing there, to jump.

 

“Would you two like to order already?” her tone now somewhat impatient.

 

Zim looked across at Dib expectantly.

 

“Oh, uh, yes.. I-I am too,” he said, laying his menu down and waiting for Zim, extremely curious what the irken would order.

 

“Zim will have number 36, dressing on the side, and a small portion of steakhouse fries - and make that _vegan;_  please, no animal fat.”

 

The waitress wrote it down and turned to Dib.

 

He realized he was still staring at Zim and tore his gaze away to look up at the waitress. “Oh! Uh, just a deluxe cheeseburger and fries for me, please.”

 

“Alright, it’ll be up in a few.”

 

When she’d picked up the menus and left the table, Dib began to sputter. “Y-you’re actually eating _hu- ”_ he caught himself and lowered his voice to an excited whisper. _“ -human_ food, Zim??”

 

“Yes…?”

 

“I thought you _couldn't,_ that you _hated_ it!”

 

Zim shrugged.

 

“Wait, what IS number 36?”

 

“All in good time, be patient and you will see,” Zim replied, giving Dib a grin that revealed he knew exactly how desperate Dib was to find out what the irken had ordered.

 

The two fell silent as they waited, both lost in their own thoughts. Within moments, both idly began drumming their fingers on the table in unison. Then Zim took a spoonful of the whipped cream and ate it, so Dib decided to follow suit.

 

Dib still had lots of questions, but knew this wasn't the place, so did his best to stay quiet.

 

“Here you go, Darlings,” the waitress suddenly announced, placing dishes before them. “A number 36 for you, and a cheeseburger deluxe for you. Also, seems the kitchen messed up and put both your fries on one plate, but I made sure they're all vegen. Hope you two don't mind sharing.”

 

Zim said nothing as he inspected his main dish: A fresh, green salad with what appeared to be a vinaigrette dressing.

 

Dib blinked, but shook his head. “No, it’s ok… Right, Zim?”

 

The irken nodded after a moment. “It is good.”

 

“Enjoy your meal, Darlings.” And she left again.

 

Dib picked up his burger and took a bite.

 

“Eugh! How can you eat that?” Zim asked shuddering.

 

Dib looked at his burger and swallowed. “What, it’s good.”

 

Zim made gagging noises.

 

“Oh, stop already,” Dib grumbled as he reached for a fry, then cried as Zim slapped his hand.

 

“Zim's!” the Irken snapped, pulling the fries towards himself.

 

“Hey! They both of ours, the kitchen put both portions onto one plate! So, they’re mine too!” He reached out again.

 

“Hands off the fries, you wretched hyooman!”

 

“But that’s not fair!”

 

Zim merely hissed.

 

“Fine!” Dib snapped and took a bit of his burger, chewing as obnoxious as he could.

 

Zim, apparently satisfied that the fries were safe, turned back to his salad and started pouring the dressing over it, ignoring Dib’s efforts to annoy him.

 

After both were half way through their meals, the waitress returned. “Hey, Darlings, do you need anything? Refills, maybe?”

 

Zim indicated his empty hot chocolate and raised a finger, unable to speak due to a mouth full of salad.

 

“Another hot chocolate for the cutie is coming up.” Then she turned to Dib. “You too?”

 

Dib nodded and she picked up both empty mugs and put them on her tray and left.

 

Dib looked at the fries longingly and Zim glared at him, so Dib returned to his burger, again trying to annoy the irken.

 

Dib was startled out of his attempts when waitress returned and set a full mug before him, then one to Zim. As she sat Zim’s down, she bent down and whispered. “By the way, I think your friend’s an alien.”

 

Dib’s head snapped up and Zim busted up laughing.

 

“What?? What about _him??_ ” He pointed across the table at Zim.

 

Chuckling too, the waitress walked away.

 

“She thinks I’M the alien?? _You’re_ the one who’s green!”

 

"I'm better at being a hyooman than you," Zim said matter-of-factly, then picked up a fry and held it out to Dib.

 

“Huh?” Dib looked at it confused.

 

“You wanted fries too, have one.”

 

Dib hesitantly took it. “Uh, thanks, I think…”

 

Zim took another for himself, then slid the fries toward the human and resumed eating.

  


 

***

 


	5. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, short chapter is short, but now you get the idea where the story is going. Hope you enjoy!

#  Chapter 4

  
  
  


Back in the Voot Runner and on their way, Dib had closed his eyes.

 

“Dib?”

 

When he didn't respond for dozing off, Zim shook him.

 

“Ah! Huh-what-who…?” the human stammered awake with a start.

 

“Didn't you sleep last night?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“You seem very tired.”

 

“Oh… uh, yeah… I-I don't know...” His watch beeped, cutting him off.  “Oh! Hold on…” He clicked it, turning it off, then reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a small bottle. He opened it and popped two small pills into his mouth, then picked up a bottle of Poop cola and took a drink to swallow them down. He noticed the irken was staring right at him. “What?”

 

“What were those?”

 

“Oh… just something I-I have to take now…” But Zim didn't seem convinced and Dib raised his hands. “It’s not like illegal drugs, don't worry!” He didn't want to talk about it further, though.

 

“And what are you taking then?”

 

“It’s nothing, Zim,” be said and turned away to look out the window, his eyelids feeling heavy again.

 

“Computer,” he heard Zim’s voice as he began drifting off again. “Scan Dib and tell me what that drug was.”

 

“If I must…” the computer replied.

  
  
  


***

  
  


When Dib awakened, it was to discover that it was dark out and they had stopped. “Are we there already?” He yawned and stretched, still feeling tired.

 

“No, Dib. We’re at a motel. We need a room for the night.”

 

Weary, Dib followed Zim into the motel, the irken carrying two of their bags as they walked up to the desk.

 

“A room with two beds, please,” Zim announced to the man at the desk, setting the bags down.

 

“Name?”

 

“Zim.”

 

“That’ll be 35 bucks, and checkout is noon, Mr. Zim. - Room 8 is free.”

 

Zim nodded and retrieved money from his PAK, which he placed on the table. The man slid a paper and pen over and Zim signed it, then received the keys. He picked up the bags and lead Dib back outside and along the rooms until he stopped at #8. He unlocked it and they went inside.

 

Dib made his way over to a bed and flopped down, rubbing his head.

 

Zim, meanwhile, opened up one of the bags and removed what appeared to be a small irken tablet computer, which he sat down on the other bed with and began typing on. “Hmmm…”

 

Dib’s watch beeped and Zim looked up. Dib pulled out his medication along with the bottle of soda from his own bag Zim had carried, and took his pills.

 

“Hmmm…”

 

Dib looked up feeling monitored somehow. “Zim?”

 

“It’s just as I thought…” the irken thought aloud to himself.

 

“What is? What are you doing?”

 

“What exactly do you think you’re taking the medicine for again, Dib?”

 

Dib looked away. “It’s just something I have to take.”

 

Zim jumped up from the bed and ran over to the human, grabbing his shirt caller. “Tell Zim NOW!”

 

They glared at each other, but Zim’s was worse.

 

“Fine!” Dib gave in. “I’m sick, alright?!”

 

Zim released him. “Oh, you're not SICK, Dib; YOU'RE DYING!”

 

“How do you know?!”

 

“Your cells are breaking down! Tell Zim why!”

 

Dib looked down at his feet and sighed. “Do I have to?”

 

“YES! Now commence with the telling!”

 

Dib’s shoulders fell. “I-I’m not like other humans, Zim,” he began, his voice weak. “I’m a... I'm a...  _ c-clone _ ….” he choked on the word, feeling like he would start crying.

 

“You’re a  _ what?? _ ”

 

“A clone… It’s a genetically-”

 

“I know what a clone is!”

 

“Ok… well, I-I’m unstable and… and these -” he pulled out the bottle and handed it to the irken. “- these are to help counter it… I have to take them every four hours, but… but they won’t cure it, they just slow it down. - And make me really tired…”

 

Looking at the bottle, Zim blinked at Dib. “Hmmm…” From his PAK, his com extended. “GIR! Come in GIR! I need you to pack up the base and bring it to my coordinates pronto! - AND HURRY! Time is of the essence!” The connection closed and it retreated into his PAK.

 

“What are you up to?”

 

“Irkens are very advanced in cloning technology, so I want to get a better look at you.” Zim sat down beside him.

 

Dib looked up. “Do… you mean you think you can help me?”

 

“Maybe. I need to know what KIND of cloning I’m looking at first.”

 

Dib nodded and sighed. “I-I’m not sure…” He shuffled his feet nervously. “I-I didn't even know I was a clone until… this started.”

 

“How long ago?”

 

“A few years… Just before I was sent away… That’s why I’ve been sent away, because the institution is trying to find a way fix me. That and my dad wanted me to be away from home because of my interest in the paranormal and, well, so I don't keep making up stories about you being an alien.” He took off his glasses and covered his eyes, trying not to start crying.

 

“When GIR gets here, I’ll take a look,” Zim said in a reassuring tone.

 


	6. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uhhh... let's just pretend the science is sound in this one, ok? LOL!

#  Chapter 5

  
  


“Is this gonna hurt?”

 

After GIR arrived, Zim had converted the room into something of an alien medical bay, complete with an examination table over one of the beds.

 

“It’s just a scan,” the now undisguised Zim explained. “Lay down. - And take your shoes and jacket off.”

 

Dib did as he was told and crawled into the table, then laid down on his back.

 

“Good, now just relax and don't move, this’ll take a bit.” Zim began typing in commands on the control.

 

Dib closed his eyes and waited as the machine came to life and began scanning.

 

It ultimately took a couple minutes before Zim turned it off. “Ok, you can get up.”

 

Dib did so slowly, feeling somewhat achy from having laid on the hard table. Creature comforts, such as soft tables, apparently weren't an irken thing, he decided.

 

He got up and walked over to Zim, curious what the findings were. Zim, however, was bent over what looked sorta like a futuristic microscope, occasionally adjusting things by tapping on a touchscreen.

 

“This will take a while, Dib; just go lay down,” he murmured without looking up.

 

After a moment, Dib sighed and nodded. “Ok.” He went over to the free bed as he was told and sat down. He already felt like napping again and it shortly got the better of him. Yawning, he crawled up on the bed and curled up into a ball.

  
  


***

 

He was awakened by Zim, softly shaking his shoulder. He yawned and sat up stretching. He picked his glasses up from the night stand and put them on. “Did you find anything?”

 

Zim nodded, he had a tablet in his hands. “I have analysed the scans and recognize the way it was done.”

 

“Oh?” Dib brightened up. “You have? Do you think you can fix it, too?”

 

Zim bit his lip. “Well… sorta… but I don't think you’ll like it much.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I’ve been working all night, reading from the Irken databanks about cloning. I’ve only found ONE thing. The problem with you, is that your DNA is defective and literally tearing itself apart.”

 

Dib moaned miserably. “But-but you said you could fix it, right?”

 

“I-I could… I’d have to repair or even replace parts of your DNA…”

 

“Ok… is that too hard or what?”

 

Zim turned away and headed over to the computer’s main panel. “Well, it won’t be  _ easy _ on you, but it isn’t impossible.”

 

“Then what’s the problem?!” Dib cried, frustrated by the irken’s stalling.

 

“The only way I can do it is to use Irken DNA. It’s strong enough to heal you.”

 

“I-Irken DNA??” Dib felt dizzy and gripped the sheets in his fists, trying to ground himself. “You mean I’d turn into an IRKEN?!?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Oohhhh…” He felt faint and lost his balance.

 

As he slumped forward, Zim caught him before he hit the floor, then eased him back onto the bed.

 

“Isn't there another way?” he whined weakly.

 

“I’m sorry, Dib. It’s this or, eventually, your cells will collapse -” He held up the bottle with Dib’s meds. “- even with these. And it’s accelerating.”

 

“A-accelerating? Y-you mean it’s going faster?”

 

“Yes,” Zim answered.

 

“H-how long”?

 

“I don’t know… maybe a couple weeks, maybe less.”

 

“A COUPLE WEEKS???” he exploded in horror. “I ONLY HAVE A COUPLE WEEKS LEFT??!”

 

“Maybe less.”

 

The room went dark and he blacked out.

  
  


***

 

_ (((Note: Doing a little character POV shift here.))) _

  
  


“You know he doesn't have that long,” the computer spoke, breaking into Zim’s thoughts.

 

“Huh?” He looked up, glaring. “What do you mean, Computer?”

 

“Given how much he’s progressed since I first scanned him and how his inferior cells are deteriorating, he doesn't have a couple weeks left.”

 

“Then how long does he have?” Zim demanded as he continued to glare up at the ceiling, antennae flat against his head.

 

“By my calculations, he’ll be lucky if he has another two days.”

 

“TWO DAYS?!” Zim exploded in horror.

 

“Yes, so you’d better start transforming him now, if you want to have any chance of success.”

 

Zim sighed as he glanced back at the bed where the unconscious human was laying. Then he turned up again. “Computer,” Zim began, decided and authoritative. “Start your calculations for human-irken DNA transformation!”

 

Should he indeed be able to convince Dib to do the transformation, he wanted everything ready so no time would be wasted.

 


	7. Chapter 6

#  Chapter 6

  
  


Dib awakened and sat up, rubbing his aching head and feeling like he’d had the worst nightmare ever.  He realised his watch was beeping, so he jumped up to find the pills.

 

“Zim, have you seen my…”

 

“Try these,” the irken said, holding out his hand with different pills. “These are better. - And we need to talk urgently.”

 

Dib looked at the pills doubtfully and hesitated. “I don’t know, Zim… I should probably just take the ones I was prescribed, you know?”

 

“They can’t help you anymore, Dib.”

 

If Dib wasn’t mistaken, the irken looked decidedly sad to him. “I don’t know… are you sure?”

 

“Trust me, Dib.” He held his hand out closer. “Just one.”

 

Sighing, Dib took one of the pills and popped it in his mouth, then took a swig of cola and swallowed, hoping Zim was right.

 

“Good. Now...” Zim walked over to his computer, tapped some things on the display, then turned back to look over at the human. “I need you to make a choice now, Dib. I can save you, but only by transforming you into an Irken.”

 

Dib groaned. “I hoped that was just a nightmare…” Then he reached up and rubbed his aching temples. “Well, I still have a few weeks to decide, so I’ll just keep thinking first…”

 

“I was wrong - yes, I know, it’s incredible and rare! - Dib, you don’t have a couple weeks… I have to have a decision now.”

 

Dib sunk down onto the bed. “Why?”

 

“Your DNA is breaking down faster than originally anticipated,” the irken admitted.

 

“Are you SURE this transformation will help me?”

 

Zim nodded.

 

“But how can you be sure?” Dib did not feel convinced of Zim’s plot.

 

“Because… I’m a test tube baby, as you hyoomans call it, too.”

 

Dib gasped. “YOU??”

 

The Irken nodded.

 

“I don’t understand,” Dib bemoaned, rubbing his head.

 

Zim shrugged. “Oh, well most Irkens pretty much are. We’re created in smeeteries - they’re labs for growing smeets - through DNA merging.”

 

Dib rubbed his head, then was suddenly overcome with spasming pain and doubled over.

 

“Dib, I’m sorry, but I need an answer now. I need to start as soon as possible if I’m going to do it.”

 

As soon as it had passed, Dib looked up, his eyes watering. “A-are you absolutely positive that it will work? That I won’t just die soon as an Irken instead?”

 

Zim nodded. “I know it will, Dib.”

 

Before he could answer, another surge of pain took him, this one stronger than the other, and he cried out as he curled up.

 

When this one passed, he was left gasping for air and sniffled, tears staining his cheeks.  He felt the irken sit down next to him and place his gloved hand on the his shoulder.

 

“It’s time to decide, Dib.” Zim’s tone sounded more urgent than before.

 

“I don’t know, Zim,” he protested miserably. He screamed out as another one took him, this one much stronger than the last and felt as though he were being torn apart, limb-by-limb, his very guts revolting against their home inside him.

 

When it finally passed, he was worn out and noticed he tasted blood. He dashed his mouth on the back of his hand and blinked in confusion at the sight of red blood. HIS blood, he realised with a start, and let out a sobbing gasp.

 

“Dib? Can I start?” Zim’s voice very urgent now. “Please, if I don’t, you’ll be dead in 24 hours!”

 

Dib looked up and wiped his eyes and cheeks dry, his amber eyes meeting the ruby of the irken’s, then a spasm overtook him and this one even worse still.

 

Dib doubled over again. “Y-YES!” he screamed at the top of his lungs. “DO IT, ZIM!” The pain wrenched another scream from him. “F-FIX ME!”

 

“Ok, Dib.”

 

In a moment of respite, he looked disbelievingly at his hands, now covered in his blood and he was aware his nose and mouth were now sopping wet.

 

The last thing he remembered before everything went dark, was Zim’s voice barking commands at the computer before the irken returned to him and injected something into his arm.

 

***

  
  


He slowly came to, feeling strange, yet warm. Something was covering his mouth and nose, and when he opened his eyes, he seemed to be floating in goo making everything blurry. Or it was because he didn't have his glasses on, if he could only remember what those were.

 

After a couple moments, a green being with ruby eyes came into his field of vision and looked up at him, giving him a thumbs up before tapping on what appeared to be a control box.

 

A moment later, the goo began draining, though Dib was still suspended. When the goo was drained, the door opened and he was slowly lowered to the ground, the breathing device retreated. He took his first deep, gasping breath of air before he lost his balance and lurched forward into the awaiting arms of his companion as soon as he was released from the machine.

 

Zim carried him to the bed and sat him on it. “How do you feel?”

 

“Not… good…” he mumbled weakly, his tongue felt strange. He bent over and began vomiting on the floor near his feet.

 

When he’d finished emptying his guts of what appeared to be more of the goo and something dark green, he felt dizzy and weak. His entire body felt numb and he couldn't remember where he was, nor was he even sure of  _ who _ he was. He was cold, as well, and shivered.

 

“Oh, here,” Zim murmured and pulled a blanket from the bed around his shoulders.

 

He clung to it for warmth.  “T-tired….” he mumbled and laid down on the bed, curling up into a ball.

  
  


***

  
  


As he awakened again, he was aware of a distant aching in his body. He yawned and stretched, then groaned as something on his head was hurting. He raised his head and the sensation of having had something pinched was met by relief.

 

The lights were dim, but he could see just fine, including the grotesque tubes that served as the ceiling. He could hear sounds, something beeping, a harsh electrical buzzing that he couldn't place or make sense of, as well as the TV.

 

None of it made any sense to him and he further felt woozy. He collapsed back on the bed.

 

“Just a few more minutes, Dib, then you’ll feel like your old self again.”

 

He heard the voice and turned his head to see the green alien with ruby eyes bent over working on something across the room. He could understand the words on some level, but they didn't make sense to him. He closed his eyes again then shortly  let out a weak groan of protest as he was being moved, rolled over onto his tummy.

 

“Stay calm, I just need access to your back,” the oddly familiar voice reassured him.

 

He relaxed, not able to protest anyway. Not even sure why he’d want to, as being on his tummy wasn't so bad, he decided groggily.

 

There was a high-pitched buzz and a scream wrenched from him as he felt terrible pain of his spine being drilled into ripped through him. A moment later, something attached itself to his back and the pain was gone.

 

“There, now… how do you feel?”

 

“I… I…” He blinked, his memories coming back to him.

 

“What’s your name? Tell Zim now!”

 

“I-I’m Dib Membrane…” He rolled over and sat up. He still felt weird, but his mind was much clearer now, the haze seeming to magically lift. “What… what happened?”

 

A huge grin broke out on Zim’s face. “IT WORKED! - I, ZIM, HAVE TRULY GENIUS BRAIN-MEATS!” He laughed evilly, prancing around and pumping his fist, while GIR popped out of a tube and joined him, screeching with laughter.

 

“I’m still confused… a-a minute ago, I could hardly move... or think. What’d you do?”

 

Zim stopped his victory prancing and walked up to him. “Dib, I pronounce you a healthy Irken child!”

 

GIR cheered. “Healthy like a mongoose! -  _ What? ” _

 

Ignoring the robot, Dib raised his hands and looked at them, noticing they were pale green and three-fingered. “Does this mean I’m completely Irken now?”

 

“Yes,” Zim said, nodding.

 

Dib groaned, reaching up and feeling his smooth head. “OH! WHERE’S MY HAIR?! DID YOU TAKE MY HAIR??!” he shrieked, then his hands found two smooth antennae and he pulled on them. “Wha- DO I HAVE ANTENNAE???” He gave them a good yank in frustration and squealed in pain. “OW, IT HURTS!! WHY DOES IT HURT?!!”

 

Zim glared at him. “You’re an Irken now, what did you expect? We don't have hair, we have antennae!”

 

Dib released said appendages with a sigh and started looking himself over. “I’M NAKED! WHY AM I NAKED!?” He drove for the covers and wrapped himself up in them, peeking out through a small hole.

 

Zim yawned, suddenly looking weary. “Your clothes are there…” He pointed to a chair. “Computer, we are done! Now return this filthy hyooman room of sleeping BACK into a filthy hyooman room of… sleeping!” He yawned.

 

“Yes, Master.”

 

With that, all the alien machines and tubes retreated, eventually revealing the motel room Zim had checked them into before.

 

“Yay, sleeping!” GIR squealed in delight. “I like sleeping!” To prove his point, he rolled over right where he stood in the middle of the floor between their beds and curled up sucking his thumb.

 

Dib looked away from the robot and back to Zim. “Zim? How… how long has it been? How long have we been here in the motel?”

 

Zim, now looking very weary and having trouble keeping his eyes open, stumbled over to the free bed. “One… -” he yawned. “- one Earth week… - Zim is tired now...” he collapsed on the bed. “Sleeeeep…”

 

Shortly, the sounds of soft snoring met his ears and Dib lowered the blanket some. Deciding now was his best chance to cloth himself, he tentatively got up and made his way over to the desk, hoping the others wouldn't wake up. He glanced back nervously, but neither Zim nor GIR had moved and both looked to be sleeping soundly, so he decided to check himself over briefly before covering up.

 

The room didn't have a full-length mirror and he had to go into the bathroom to find one at all, so he grabbed his clothes and shut himself inside, placing them on the toilet lid and turning to the sink.

 

He had half a mind to wash his face when he remembered something and shuddered. Instead, he just approached the little mirror and peered at his reflection: Peering back at him was, without a doubt, an Irken, but he didn't look exactly like Zim. His eyes were more rounded, like they had been when he was a human, and most notably, they were amber! Wouldn't he have Zim’s colour?, he wondered to himself. Then again, he remembered Tak had had purple eyes. Maybe irkens had lots of different eye colours, then.

 

He looked down at the sink, still contemplating whether he should clean himself up or not, but unable to ignore the memories of how Zim reacted to water, he decided not to risk it. 

 

So, blowing out a sigh, he began to get dressed. Pulling his shirt on, however, proved to be too much of a task, for there seemed to be a lump on his back. He inspected it as best he could in the mirror, finding that was light grey with pink polka dots. “OH NO!! I HAVE ONE OF THESE _TOO?!”_

 


	8. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one does make a small reference to an unfinished episode. I believe you can find the Storyboard version online, it's called "Ten Minutes to Doom".
> 
> Also, anyone familiar with tortises might have a good laugh.
> 
> Obviously, I had a lot of fun with this one.

# Chapter 7

  


Having only managed to get his pants on his new body, a topless Dib was sitting on his bed lost in thoughts about his situation, a blanket pulled tightly around his shoulders, when Zim awakened.

 

The irken stretched and, with a yawn, sat up. “Sorry about that, it’s been a lot of work changing you.” Zim murmured, his voice still thick with sleep. “But I am rested now. - And I never want to do that again… _evil sleep_ _...”_ he hissed the last part.

 

“You are?” Dib looked at his watch. “You barely slept for two hours!”

 

“I was tired!” the alien exploded, jumping up from the bed, his usual level of energy obviously fully restored, and marched over to Dib. “Zim has been up for a week straight working around the clock to save you from _your filthy, defective little DNA!”_ He poked Dib in the chest. “Give me the gratitude of which I am soooo deserving!”

 

Dib raised his hands in defense. “Ok, ok! That wasn't what I meant! I expected you to sleep _longer!”_

 

Zim blinked. “Oh.” He backed down and gave Dib a good looking over. “Now what do you think about your new DNA? Zim is good, yes?”

 

“Well, I wish you’d left my _hair_ …” he sighed, as he reached up and grabbed his antennae. “And I still haven't figured out how these… _things_ work.” He released them and they sprung back up, then he nodded his head a few times and they bobbed up and down. “Sometimes, I think I can almost control them, but mostly they just do whatever they want.” As he huffed, they laid back against his head.

 

Zim grinned smugly and wiggled his antennae. “Zim has total control of his! TOTAL!”

 

Dib rolled his eyes at his companion’s boasting. “Yeah, well, how do you do that?”

 

“The same way I control my fist.” He raised it and shook it, then he scratched his chin. “But you’ll probably figure it out in time.”

 

Dib sighed and gave a nod, then lowered the blanket, twisting to show his PAK off to Zim. “Oh, and why do I have this thing on my back? Did your Irken DNA create that too?”

 

“Oh, I set that up for you myself,” Zim replied looking quite pleased with himself. “During the procedure, you started to fade away, so I downloaded your _braaaainnnssss_ into it.”

 

Unsure he’d heard right, Dib’s mouth fell open. “You WHAT?!”

 

GIR popped up from under the bed. “I like brains! They're yummy!”

 

“I downloaded your brains into the PAK, so you wouldn't be lost,” Zim repeated calmly. “...You know?”

 

“That’s just spooky!” he cried, shuddering and cringing. “D-does that mean you or some other Irken personality is going to take me over now like yours once tried to??” The experience had been terrifying and just the thought made him want to retch.

 

Zim laughed, shaking his head. “Of course not! This was a blank PAK!”

 

“A blank PAK? You just happened to have a blank PAK just... _lying around??””_

 

“Yes! It’s a spare in case mine should ever be irreparably damaged, so I can download my PAK’s data into it. - But now it’s yours for I am so generous, GENEROUS! DON’T YOU LOVE ZIM?!”

 

“I DOOOO!” GIR jumped on the irken and squeezed.

 

“OW!! DOWN, GIR!” Zim shoved him down along his body to the floor and stepped out of his grip.

 

“I don’t believe this…” Dib groaned, his shoulders slumping. “So… what else should I know about the PAK and being an irken? What does it do?”

 

Zim gave it a couple moments thought. “Well, for starters, don't take it off.”

 

“Seriously?? W-will I _die_ without it??”

 

Zim nodded. “Yes, Dib. But the upside is that now you won't be sick, or lose your memory, it regulates your body temperature and other vitals, and you’ll never truly forget anything, even if you bump your large head, and you probably don't need glasses anymore. - And it also has a lot of really cool stuff!”

 

“I think I'm gonna be sick to my stomach… - Wait, do I even _have_ a stomach?”

 

Zim glared. “NOOO! You have none of these primitive, inferior hyooman organs!” he shouted complacently. “You have a SQUEEDLYSPOOCH!”

 

Dib pulled the blankets over his head with a groan.

 

“By the way,” he heard Zim’s voice from under the pile, it was now accusing. “Why didn't you tell me you have a communication device in your bag!?”

 

Dib lowered the covers to peak out at Zim. “A communication device?”

 

“Yes! And it was squawking and squawking and driving Zim mad! - OHHH, THE SQUAWKING!”

 

“I liked the squawking! It was scary!” GIR chimed in.

 

“Oh no!” A thought came to Dib and he sprung up from the bed, grabbing his bag and retrieving his phone. He pressed a button, but got a dead battery warning, so he went rummaging through his bag for the cable. “I haven't checked in for a week! My family is going to kill me!”

 

This was one of those times where he cursed himself for having been lax in his organising of late and picked up the bag, dumping its contents out on the bed, finding the charger had been crumpled up at the very bottom. He plugged it into a wall socket and into the phone. Now he just had to wait until it had enough of a charge to start up.

 

“Oh, what am I gonna tell them??” He gave Zim a pleading look.

 

GIR jumped onto the bed next to Dib. “You can give them a piggy!” He opened his chest compartment and pulled out a rubber pig.

 

“No thanks… Uh, you can keep the piggy,” Dib replied, pushing it back towards GIR.

 

“YAY, PIGGY!”

 

Zim shrugged. “Tell them that you're in a sick person place… thingy?”

 

“You mean a hospital?”

 

“Yes, yes, that… miserable, primitive excuse for a place of hyooman bodily repair!” Zim made a horrified face.

 

“Why would they believe that??”

 

Zim looked right at him, eyes half lidded. “Oh, I don't know, Dib! Certainly not because you've been gone a week with your DNA RIPPING YOU APART LIKE… well, DNA that is ripping you apart from deep within your horrible guts. - Oh, the blood! And DOOM!” he yelled and fell to his knees dramatically.

 

Dib considered it a moment. “That... could work!” Then raised his now non-existent eyebrow at Zim as he continued to carry on about bloody doom and gloom. “And your people actually said you’re defective?”

 

“And mooooore-” Zim stopped suddenly and looked at him, blinking cutely as he stood back up. “I know, crazy, right?”

 

“Oh, it boggles the mind, Zim… It boggles the mind...”

 

All of a sudden, Dib’s ringtone sounded.

 

“OH! THE HORRIBLE SQUAWKING!!!!” Zim screamed, covering his ears. “MAKE IT STOP!!!”

 

“Oh, calm down, I’ll just tell them I’m at the hospital like you said…” He picked up the phone and saw Gaz’s number. “No! Wait! I can't talk to them if I’m in the hospital!” He thrust the phone out to Zim. _“_ _You_ have to!”

 

“Huh? ME?? Why me?!”

 

“Because if _I_ do, Gaz Will know I’m _lying! ”_

 

Zim, however, did not look convinced and folded his arms.

 

“Please, Zim! How am I supposed to talk if my DNA is being ripped apart??”

 

Zim made no move to take the phone as Dib held it out, now positively trembling.

 

“Zim! Come on! I’m BEGGING you! Just tell Gaz I’m lying on an operating table with all sorts of tubes and goo and stuff! You can even describe how my guts are all over the place and there’s blood and-and… -” He paused seeing Zim looking horrified. “- Gaz will love that. - PLEEEAAASSE!!!”

 

Zim shuddered. “You know, sometimes I think hyoomans are even creepier than the Armada...” Then he snatched the phone from Dib. “FINE, Zim shall talk to your spooky sister! - But _only_ because I like it when you BEG!” He pressed the button and held it in front of his mouth like a walky-talky. “HELLO, SISTER OF DIB? THIS IS… THE DOCTOR!”

 

Dib cringed, realising he'd probably just made a huge mistake having Zim handle it. He was positive he could _feel_ Gaz plotting to destroy him.

 

Then Zim laughed. “No, no, actually this is Zim,” he began in a normal tone of voice, placing the phone to the side of his head. “I’m supposed to inform you that your brother, the Dib, is in the hospital.” Zim paused a moment. “What? Of course it was ME! Who else _but me_ would perform all the evil, but genius, alien experiments on his filthy guts?!” He paused again. “Yes, yes, I’ll tell him. - Goodbye, Dib-Sister!” He hung up the phone and held it out to Dib. “There, are you _happy_ now?” he hissed.

 

“What’d she say??!” Dib exploded, trembling even more now as he tried to take the phone without dropping it.

 

“She’s going to destroy you if I leave any of you leftover.”

 

Dib buried his face in his hands. “She… doesn't believe you… does she?”

 

“Nope. Not a word.”

 

Whether this was good or bad news, he wasn't sure, but at least it was over. He flopped back on the bed, panting and trying to will his nerves to calm.

 

Zim then marched over to his bed, picked up a tablet-computer and took out the stylus. “So, we should probably design a disguise for you now.”

 

Dib did not feel up to anything else and just let out a loud, long-suffering moan.

 

“You know, Dib, if you keep carrying on like that, our motel neighbours will think I’m trying to breed hyoomans in here!”

 

Dib blinked, looking over at Zim through one eye as the words registered. “OH, ZIM!” Dib cried, his cheeks heating up. “These are the sounds of sheer _misery_ , not.. not _breeding!_ ”

 

“Funny, I don't see how you can even tell the difference. Even your Earth tortises sound like they’re having a better time than hyoomans when mating.”

 

Dib blinked. “How do you know what mating humans and tortises- WAIT, NO! SAY NOTHING! I DON'T WANT TO KNOW!” He pulled the covers over his head and whimpered. “Just stop it, Zim! Why are we even talking about this??”

 

He heard Zim walk up and felt him sit down next to him.

 

“Poor, poor, little irken Dibworm,” he snickered in mock sympathy. “So, do you want to work out your hyooman disguise now or not?” he finished in tone that clearly signaled he was ready to get back to business.

 

Dib slowly pulled back the covers to see Zim watching him impatiently. “I guess so…” He'd welcome anything that turned the conversation away from _mating._  He crawled further out of the covers and sat up, scooting over until he was next to the shorter irken. “What did you have in mind? Hey, can you give me hair again? Like I had before? And I should probably wear glasses, and...” He considered the other specifics that had made him recognisable as a human.

  
“Oh, Zim can do anything, Dib! Even _you."_

 

 


	9. Chapter 8

#  Chapter 8

  
  


“Irken tongues are so weird and… so… _ pointy.” _

 

Dib stood before the mirror in the bathroom again, in anything but a good mood, trying on his new disguise and, currently, examining his rather snakish, prehensile tongue with fascinated disgruntlement.

 

His disguise, however, looked like Zim’s, but with the wig styled to Dib’s old scythe haircut - he was actually quite impressed with that part - and purplish-blue contacts like Zim’s, complete with square pupils and irises - he didn't like those so much. On top of that, both were itchy and uncomfortable to wear - he really hated that.

 

Zim raised himself up on his spider legs so he could see over Dib’s shoulder. “Is Zim not amazing?! - And anyway it’s  _ hyoomans _ who have the weird tongues! So flat and… just...  _ how _ can they even  _ eat _ with them?”

 

Slightly startled, Dib’s antennae raised up, knocking the wig off into the sink. “Oh, this is stupid! And my skin is still green,” he grumbled, no longer interested in comparing peculiar new body parts.

 

The reflection next to his glared. “What?! What did you expect?? You wanted a disguise that looks like you!”

 

“My skin wasn't green and my eyes weren't purple! And what good is it if my antennae keep knocking this thing off?”

 

“You will just have to learn how to control them, Dib.”

 

He picked up the wig. “I thought you’d have made me a holographic one like Tak used,” he whined, trying to put the wig on and get it to stay.

 

Zim’s reflection turned dark and his eyes flashed. “I work hard for over a week to try and find a way to fix your DNA  _ and _ succeed, not an easy task let me inform you, so that you can  _ live _ and you DARE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT MY  _ DISGUISE?!  _ A DISGUISE THAT HAS SERVED ME WELL ON THIS STINKY, FILTHY,  _ MISERABLE _ BALL OF DIRT FOR  _ YEARS?!?” _ Zim roared, his sharp teeth glinting in the light above the mirror.

 

Dib shrunk down, feeling both guilty and afraid of the other’s outburst. “When you put it that way…” He gulped and turned to face Zim. “I-I’m sorry. I’m really thankful for what you did, it WAS amazing!” Zim did not give him any space, their faces a mere few centimetres apart, with Zim’s teeth bared dangerously, and Dib gulped again. “And-and the disguise isn't all  _ that _ bad, I guess… I’m sure I can probably get used to it.” He then gave Zim a look, pleading him not to kill him now. “I  _ am _ really grateful, Zim; thank you so much for everything you've done for me!”

 

“That’s better,” Zim hissed, then dropped to the ground, the spider legs retreating.

 

Dib let out a relieved sigh, then looked back to Zim. “Oh, and i-if it’s not too much trouble, do you think you can you show me how to control these, maybe?” He pointed to his antennae.

 

“And what’s in it for me?” Zim hissed, his mood seemingly not to have fully improved yet.

 

“Well, um… I…” Dib thought about it for a moment, not sure what he could offer Zim. “Oh! Well, if these things keep knocking my disguise off, then we’re both going to be exposed…” He looked nervously down at Zim. “So, I really need help with that.”

 

Zim huffed, then waved his hand dismissively. “Fine…” He turned and marched back out of the bathroom, Dib following him until he stopped and sat down on the bed opposite Dib’s. He moved his antennae up and down, first in unison, then opposing, seeming to be concentrating on his actions. “So... it really IS just like moving any other part of your body.”

 

Dib sat down across from Zim. “Ok…” His own were raised up in question.

 

“Well, they do react to your momental mood… like your face does… It’s like part of your expression, but… -” He began thoughtfully and his laid at a 45 degree angle and inwards towards each other as he considered. “- but they can be controlled as you please…” He demonstrated by laying them flat to his head, while smiling cutely. “So, maybe  _ you _ should just start by trying to make them go  _ down _ when they want to stand  _ up _ .”

 

Listening intently, Dib tried, but succeeded only in hunching up his shoulders instead. He grit his teeth. “Is it working?”

 

Zim watched for a moment and shook his head. “They’re kinda coming forward and together. - Actually, if you keep that up, they’re probably going to just get twisted up together.”

 

Dib huffed in frustration and there his antennae dropped to lie flat against his head. “Oh, NOW?? - This doesn't work!” His following attempts to now raise them on command were futile as well.

 

Zim scratched his chin, one standing up and the other laying down. “Well… sometimes young smeets have trouble and need to be helped. - I have it!”

 

Dib looked up as Zim got up and walked over to him; using his spider legs, he hopped smoothly up onto Dib’s bed and retracted the legs, then walked around to stand behind Dib.

 

“Here… like this,” he said and carefully took hold of Dib’s antennae near the bases.

 

Dib bit his bottom lip as the contact sent tremors running through the startlingly sensitive organs.

 

“Now, concentrate,” Zim instructed, giving no evidence as to whether he'd noticed the reaction he had caused or not. “You have muscles that control them, so pay attention to how it feels when I move yours.” With that, he began moving Dib’s slowly up and down, first one and then the other.

 

“Um…” Dib was having a hard time concentrating at all, but tried his best to focus on the muscles being used instead of this unanticipated new sensory input.

 

Zim continued, his fingers expertly and gently handling the delicate appendages. “Try to move them with me.”

 

Dib exhaled and tried to make his antennae do what they were told. He had the feeling it was working somewhat, but couldn't really tell for sure how much.

 

“Not bad,” Zim observed. “They feel weak, but not bad. - Now try to _stop_ me from moving them.”

 

Dib tried and tried, first focusing on the one Zim was gently moving, and grit his teeth in concentration; then he tried with the other when Zim started moving that one. This was taking too much! His lack of progress was frustrating and the situation was increasingly embarrassing.

 

Finally Zim stopped. “Well, I think you’ve got the  _ idea _ , but they are just not mature enough yet. You will just have to keep practicing with them,” he concluded, then, without warning, began slowly sliding his fingers along their lengths in a caress that set them alight. 

 

“Nnng!” Dib gasped, slightly curling in on himself.

 

“Hmm? Something  _ wrong _ , Dib?” he asked as he continued, amusement now colouring his voice.

 

“Ziiiiim,” Dib whined and shuddered. “What are you doing to meeee?” His voice trembled.

 

“Stimulating your antennae.”

 

With Zim showing no signs of stopping his light stroking, Dib was torn between whether to put an end to it himself or not. The sensations caused by his companion’s ministrations were making him feel weird, uncomfortable even, as though they were somehow doing something secretly naughty.

 

“Ziiiiimm,” he whimpered again as Zim caressed their lengths again, pausing at the tips. “Please…”

 

“I like it when you beg, Dib,” Zim replied, his pleased grin apparent in his tone. “Now what do you want from Zim?” he added silkily.

 

“Ssstooop…” Dib managed to shakily protest, his fists digging into the sheets.

 

Zim caressed again, softly and slowly. “Should I  _ really _ stop?”

 

“Y-yesss…” he whimpered,  _ wanting _ to pull away but not quite able to  _ make _ himself. “ _ Please _ , Zim…”

 

“Ok.” Zim caressed one last time very slowly to the ends, then released them and came back around to jump down off the bed and smile at Dib.

 

Dib collapsed back on the bed, feeling like he was too hot and his face was flushed. He gulped and tried to calm his still trembling body. “W-what  _ was _ that?” He couldn't believe the reaction he’d had, even his heart was pounding!

 

Zim simply chuckled and proceeded to start packing their belongings up.

 

Dib closed his eyes, trying to make sense of it. That is, until he realized what Zim was now doing and he opened an eye, turning his head to see the other irken packing his tablet into his bag.

 

“Zim? What’s up?”

 

“We’re leaving. - I'm not going to spend another night in this revolting place,” he said calmly without stopping or looking up.

 

Dib sat up. “Really? Why? I thought you’d be tired still after you only got two hours of sleep in a week.”

 

“Oh, that was more than enough.” Then he looked at the walls and visibly shuddered. “Besides, do you know what hyoomans  _ do _ in this place at night?” he hissed and shuddered again.

 

Dib looked at the wall and shrugged. “No. What?” He was sure he didn't want to try and guess what was going through Zim’s mind now.

 

Zim looked at him levely. “You wondered how I know what it sounds like when hyoomans breed?”

 

Dib’s mouth fell open.

 

Zim glared hard, raising his fists in fury. “I have been forced to listen to live demonstrations in surround sound  _ every night we’ve been here!”  _ He shot a hateful look from one wall to the other.

 

Dib wanted to die right there and was grateful he’d had the fortune to have been unconscious the whole last week. He then hopped up and joined Zim to help in packing everything together, not wanting to lose another minute, first stuffing his phone and charging cable into his bag.

 

“Oh, but, um… my PAK, I can't put a shirt on…” He remembered as he picked up said article of clothing, a dark blue, long-sleeved T-shirt with the ‘Mysterious Mysteries’ logo on the front.

 

“Oh.” Zim walked up to him and double-pressed a point on Dib’s PAK. It proceeded to detach and fall into Zim’s hands.

 

“Wha-ZIM!” he cried, alarm shooting through his body as a clock popped up in his mind’s eye and began ticking down from ‘10:00’. He flailed about, certain he’d just been sentenced to death.

 

“Oh, relax,” Zim instructed, shaking his head. “You’ll be fine for the two seconds it takes you to put your shirt on!”

 

Dib looked at his companion, then took a deep breath and yanked his shirt on over his head as fast as he could. “Now what?? - WAIT!” As an afterthought, he dashed to where his trenchcoat was hung up and quickly pulled that on too. “Ok, now… now what do I do?? It’s already at 8:24!!!”

 

“Be still.” Zim held the PAK up to Dib’s back again and it quickly reattached to it’s owner.

 

The counter disappeared and Dib released a long relieved sigh, not even caring about the potential damage to his clothing the PAK had likely caused. “Ughh, that’s so weird!” Dib felt chills run up his spine. “When it attaches or detaches, it just feels weird!”

 

Zim shrugged and resumed packing. “You get used to it.”

  
  
  


***

  
  
  


Bags in hand and Dib concentrating hard to keep his wig in place, they approached the front desk and the man smiled at them. “Another night, Mr. Zim?”

 

“No, we are checking out,” he informed the man, placing the key on the desk.

 

“Alright, sorry to see you go. The maid says you two were the cleanest customers she’s ever seen! - Not even any used condoms left in the trash can or toilets! But I guess you two wouldn't need those, would you?”

 

Dib’s mouth fell open and his wig nearly jumped off, he scrambled to grab and hold it, along with the rebellious antennae, down in time.

 

“Yes, yes, you’re welcome and goodbye!” Zim said quickly, grabbing Dib’s free arm and leading him out.

 

“Bye, you two lovebirds! Come back any time!”

 

Zim quickened his stride, throwing the door open and hurrying out with Dib in tow.

 

Dib darted forward in a mad dash as soon as he saw the Voot Cruiser, only stopping when he’d reached it, his wig now clenched tightly in his fist at his heaving chest. Zim stopped next to him, having stayed in step. 

 

“That was terrible!” he gasped as Zim began loading their bags into the back of the Voot Cruiser. “I can't believe he thought we were..!” He couldn't bring himself to say it.

 

Zim popped the top and Dib scrambled inside; hopping in after him, Zim grinned. “Not so bad in here anymore, Dib?”

 

Dib groaned. It was still cramped, but, “it’s better than staying there,” he mumbled.

 

Zim chuckled, then stopped suddenly. “Say, where’s GIR?”

 

Dib shrugged. “I haven't seen him since you finished my disguise.”

 

Zim growled, his com extending from his PAK. “GIR! Where are you? Report to the Voot Cruiser at once!”

 

A few moments later, GIR, disguised, came flying in and landed on Zim’s lap, a leaf and twig sticking out of his his dogsuit. “I was dancin’ in the leaves!”

 

Zim’s com retreated and he handed something to GIR. “GIR, take the base back to our home lot, do you think you can do that?” He glanced at Dib, then held up a hand. “That is, as long as you still  _ want _ to go to the Area 51, Dib? Or would you rather go home now?”

 

Dib thought about his family, waiting for him at home and the trouble he was sure to be in when he got back, then how much he really,  _ really _ wanted to go on a paranormal discovery adventure with Zim. “Well, if you wouldn't mind, I’d still like to go,” he admitted quietly. If he was going to be destroyed when he got home, as he was sure he would be, then he wanted to at least have something to show for it.

 

“Ok, GIR, you have your orders, do you think you can carry them out?”

 

The robot shrugged, then nodded his head happily.

 

“Do you have your guidance chip?”

 

GIR nodded.

 

“Turn it on and show me which way to our home.”

 

It took a moment, then GIR indicated North-East.

 

“Very good, GIR! Now be off with you! - Hopefully no one’s noticed the house has been gone for an entire week!”

 

GIR nodded enthusiastically. “Ok, Master! - Goodbye, Purple Dib-monkey!” He saluted and blasted off, his jets leaving a ball of smoke that had both of the irkens choking and coughing.

 

As it cleared, Dib wiped his watering eyes, his companion doing the same. “Why is he  _ still _ like that? I thought he’d have improved over the years.” He coughed again.

 

“He actually had his guidance chip, that IS an improvement,” Zim muttered, slightly hoarse, as he tapped a display, closing the top of the cruiser, then began the systems check.

 

The computer beeped and the display showed asking its familiar question.

 

“Yes, enable pilot and passenger safety fields now!” Then Zim started the engines. “And give the Dib more leg room,” he added without looking up.

 

Too relieved to complain that Zim hadn't done that right from the beginning, Dib let out a slow breath, relieved to finally be able to sit more comfortably as they started back on their journey.

  
  
  


***

  
  
  


“So, how  _ did _ you hide all your equipment -  _ and me _ \- from the maids anyway?” Dib asked when they were back riding along the freeway again and Zim had engaged the autopilot.

 

“She liked my bribe.”

 

“Wait, so you mean she didn't even SEE the room since we’ve been there?” Then another thought occurred to him. “You mean she LIED to the manager about how clean our room was??”

 

“Zim was very specific and his bribes were  _ very _ generous.”

 

Dib blinked, then fixed Zim with a worried look.

 

“The absence of articles of contraceptives were her  _ own _ embellishment, not Zim’s.”

 

“Oh… good...” he sighed in relief. “Wait, where did you even get money??”

 

“Do you dare to doubt Zim?!”

 

“Did you hack into a bank and steal it??” he fixed the other irken with a demanding glare.

 

“Oh, really, Dib,” Zim grumbled, glaring right back at him. “I wanted to take over your planet first and plunder it after!”

 

“Damnit, Zim! Just tell me!”

 

“Well, let’s put it this way: You wouldn't  _ believe _ the conversion rates for Irken-to-Earth currencies,” he said with a complacent smirk. “The two coins the Tallests put into GIR’s head alone have made Zim very wealthy by your terms!”

 

Dib blinked and scratched under the edge of his wig, still trying to practice keeping it on during the ride. He paused when he’d fully processed his companion’s words. “There is a  _ conversion rate _ for Alien and Earth currencies??”

 

“There is  _ now _ . I put them up for auction and the bids went through the roof, as hyoomans say!”

 

“Oh, hmm…” Dib considered this and resumed idly scratching under his wig.

 

“Oh, just take it off, already!” Zim snatched it away and removed his as well, dropping them to the side of him farthest from Dib.

 

“Hey! What if someone  _ sees _ us like this?!”

 

“I believe another hyooman saying is: We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.” He looked at Dib expectantly. “Right?”

 

“Well, yeah, that’s what we  _ say _ … but -” He gave a helpless groan and laid back against his seat. “- I just  _ really _ don't want to get caught!”

 

Zim huffed and rolled his eyes. “Computer?”

 

“Yes, Master?”

 

“Is there a sci-fi convention or some other such silly hyooman festivity on our way?”

 

Dib threw his hands up with a cry of defeat. “Fine! You win! - Try Las Vegas, Nevada!”

 

“He’s right,” the computer affirmed. “And it’s not too far south of your actual destination.”

 

“Impressed with Zim, yet?” He grinned, clearly pleased with himself.

 

TOO pleased with himself for Dib’s tastes at the moment, but he sighed again in defeat, remembering all Zim had done for him. “I already  _ said _ , ‘you win’.”

 

“ZIM HAS WON!” He laughed triumphantly. “And  _ what _ does Zim get for winning?”

 

Dib turned to find him grinning expectantly at Dib. “I don't know… the knowledge that you won?”

 

Zim seemed to consider it, even scratching his chin. “I don't know… that doesn't seem like much of a prize, to me.”

 

Dib gave a start. “Since when?!”

 

“Nope.” Zim shook his head. “You’ll just have to do better.” He laid back against his seat and closed his eyes, resting his hands on his tummy.

 

“Well, I don’t know… want me to write ‘ZIM WINS’ on a piece of paper?”

 

“Nope. Try again.”

 

“Should I record myself  _ saying _ it then?”

 

“Already have.” Without looking, Zim swiped his finger across the display and a recording of Dib’s voice saying ‘you win!’ and ‘ZIM WINS’ began playing over the speakers alternatingly. A wide, satisfied, closed-mouth smirk was spread out on Zim’s face as he listened. “Try again, Dib.” Zim stopped the playback.

 

"Oh, you can be so creepy!" Dib huffed, trying to think of something to appease the vainglorious irken. “Shall I… buy you lunch?”

 

“Hmm…” Zim pondered that leisurely, letting Dib wait for what seemed an eternity. 

 

“Oh, Zim…” Dib whined, losing his patience. He certainly didn't know what else he could offer if Zim didn't take him up on that.

 

“Alright,” Zim said finally. “You may treat Zim to his victory lunch.”

 

“ _ Good!” _ Dib said, just relieved to have his answer and have it settled finally. “So, when?”

 

“Whenever  _ you _ are hungry is perfectly fine.”

  
  
  


***

  
  
  


“Tell Zim more about this ‘bore-ding skool’ that was supposed to fix you?” Zim spoke up suddenly, breaking into Dib’s thoughts as he had been staring out the window watching the scenery go by, amazed that he didn't end up nodding off as he would have before the transformation.

 

“Sorry; what was that, Zim?”

 

“Zim wants to know more about this ‘bore-ding skool’ that was supposed to fix you.”

 

Dib sighed at Zim’s question, leaving a puff of fog on the window before it dissipated a second later. “Well, it  _ wasn't _ supposed to fix me, the boarding skool is just where I lived, because it was near the institution that  _ was _ and dad wanted me to continue my education despite everything.”

 

“Is it better than that thing you called ‘ _ education _ ’ back in skool at home?”

 

“Well, it’s for older kids,” Dib answered with no enthusiasm in his voice. “And it only focused on ‘ _ real _ science’,” he added bitterly. “So _D_ _ ad _ was really happy about that.”

 

“Hmmm… but  _ you _ weren't,” Zim concluded thoughtfully as he scratched his chin. “What about your sister?”

 

Dib raised his head and turned over to look at the other irken questioningly. “Gaz? What about her?”

 

“She’s been gone too.”

 

That Zim would be aware of that only half-surprised him, after he’d been so interested in Dib’s absence. “Well… when Dad sent  _ me _ away, she decided to go too… you know, to keep an eye on me or something, I guess. - With her grades, she could go to just about any skool she chose, so she chose a girl’s boarding skool near mine.”

 

“Oh…” Zim sounded thoughtful, though clearly somewhat confused.

 

“Something wrong, Zim?”

 

“I just don't understand why she’d go to a different one if she wants to keep an eye on you. That seems kinda contra-productive and just...  _ stupid _ . Especially for her.”

 

“Well, I was in an all-boys skool, Zim, so she couldn't have.”

 

“Boys and girls have to go to different skools?”

 

Dib rolled onto his side so he could face his companion. “Sometimes. Of course, the public elementary skool where you and I first met wasn't like that, but boarding skools usually are.”

 

“Well, that’s weird…”

 

“Yeah, so I guess… Irken skools aren't like that?”

 

Zim gave him a look as though he’d grown a second head. “Of course not! Everyone has the right to have the same training no matter what gender they are.”

 

“Oh… Well, I guess they do that here so that we’re not distracted by each other or something.”

 

Zim suddenly burst into a hearty laugh. “For that, they’d have to seperate  _ everyone! _ Not just the males and females!”

 

This almost made Dib want to ask about irken genders and such related topics.  _ Almost _ . The idea alone brought a blush to his cheeks and he knew he was far too shy to dare. “Yeah, I guess…” he said instead.

 

“Was it nice there at the ‘bore-ding skool’?” Zim was looking at him curiously.

 

“Not really.” He cast his gaze down.

 

“Didn’t you have any friends there either?”

 

“No,” he muttered. “It was a lot like when we were kids: No one likes me, just now they’re bigger and can hit harder.”

 

Dib’s squeedlyspooch was suddenly thrown forward as the Voot Cruiser suddenly halted, and he’d have gone flying himself were it not for the safety field.

 

“WHAT HAPPENED??” he cried in shock.

 

“SOMEONE HIT  _ YOU?!!” _ Zim exploded.

 

Startled, he shrunk back. “Uh… yes?” Dib replied in a small voice.

 

Zim slid his finger along a level on the screen, lowering the level of the safety field and crawled up to him. Ruby eyes flashing dangerously, he grabbed Dib’s shoulders. “WHO HAS BEEN HITTING MY DIB?!? TELL ZIM NOW!!!”

 

Dib cringed farther down in his seat. “L-lots of guys!”

 

Zim released him and balled his fists. “Ooh, those filthy stinkworms - filthy stinkworms OF EARTH’S ‘BORE-DING SKOOL’!!!” Then he lowered his hands to the seat, so he was on all fours.

 

“Zim-”

 

Zim clapped his hand over Dib’s mouth. “Say no more words! For I, Zim, shall accompany you to this...  _ bore-ding skool of painful doom,  _ should you choose to return to it!”

 

Dib pulled Zim’s hand away from his mouth and gasped. “You’d go  _ with _ me??”

 

“Of course, for  _ I AM ZIM _ and I have given you  _ my word!” _

 

“Ok, but...  _ why?” _

 

Zim’s expression suddenly changed to apathy, his brow knitted with emotion. “Because I don't want anyone to hurt you anymore, Dib.”

 

In shock, he gaped at his companion. “Y-you…  _ d-don’t?” _

 

“Why would I save your life just to let those… those… those  _ rotten stinkbeasts  _ beat it back out of you??”

 

“I-I don't… I don't know…”

 

“Because I  _ wouldn't!  _ \- Because you're  _ all _ I have, Dib.”

 

“DANGER! Earth vehicle on a collision course!” the computer suddenly announced.

 

Alarms sounded off and warning lights flashed in the cruiser.

 

“...Brace for impact in 2-”

 

“EVASIVE MANEUVERS  _ NOW!” _ Reacting fast, Zim cut in and threw himself on top of Dib protectively as the Voot Cruiser shot upward at a 45 degree angle and twisted hard to the right, unable to completely avoid an impact which knocked out the safety field completely. In a flash, Zim had positioned his spider legs at key points throughout the cabin in an effort to compensate.

 

Unable to do anything but cling to Zim as they were bucked and jolted about, Dib shut his eyes and hoped they’d be spared.

 

The cruiser came to a halt, then slowly lowered back down and stopped near the ground. “Emergency evasive maneuvers successful. Safe resting place chosen,” the computer announced over the sirens.

 

“Run diagnostics! How bad were we hit??” Zim barked, still laying on Dib’s tummy protectively.

 

“Minor damage to outer hull - Front windshield has been pierced - Engines have over-heated - Safety field is offline.”

 

“Silence the alarm so I can think!”

 

The computer complied and wonderful silence washed over them.

 

Zim raised himself up some to look at Dib. “Are ok, Dib?”

 

His eyes still shut tight, Dib wasn’t quite aware it had ended. He felt Zim shake him.

 

“Dib? Dib, it's over, we’ve stopped.”

 

“Next time, don’t just stop _ in the middle of the freeway,”  _ the computer interjected, irritation clear in its robotic voice.

 

“Oh, SHUT UP and begin the repairs!” Zim snapped, then turned back to Dib. “It’s over, Dib. Dib? Dib, say something already, you’re scaring me!”

 

“It-it’s over?” Dib groaned and shifted slightly underneath him. “I-I think I’m ok...” daring to open his eyes, he looked up at Zim. “Y-yeah, I’m alright. - I-I want out now… p-please?”

 

“Ok, but first, I have to compliment you on the quick use and impressive control of your PAK legs.”

 

Dib blinked and it was in that moment he realized his own were spread about the little cabin as well, unfortunately one hadn't aimed well and had poked through the windshield. Regardless, he was still excited about them. “I didn't even realize I was using them! So, how do I -” His spider legs swiftly retreated into his PAK. “- Oh! Ok, and how did I do that?”

 

Zim’s retreated as well. “With your thoughts and desires, that PAK is connected to your spinal cord and your nervous system. In other words, it’s mind-controlled. It does, of course, have a brain of its own, making it able to sense when you are in mortal danger and able to protect you.”

 

“Well, that is just so cool! Very creepy! But still really cool!”

 

Chuckling, Zim backed off of him, popped the top and, helping Dib, they crawled out.

 

Once Dib was on solid ground, the reality of what they’d just been through came crashing home and he dropped to his knees, taking deep breaths and trying to keep hold of himself.

 

“Are you ok?”

 

“Y-yes… just… in s-shock now…” he explained between lungfuls of air. “J-just need… a couple of… of moments… p-please…”

 

“Ok, Dib.” Zim went to check the damage to his craft. “Computer, where is the other vehicle?” He raised himself up with his spider legs and inspected the top of the craft as well.

 

“I don’t know, it didn't stop.”

 

Zim growled angrily.

 

“You could probably find it, though, after the engines are back online,” it suggested.

 

“Oh? Did you get its vehicle identification number?”

 

“Yes. Also, it was painted like an Earth bee.”

 

Zim balled up his fists. “Of  _ course _ it was…” he hissed, then walked back over to Dib.

 

Dib looked up at him and gave a small smile to show the other that he was ok and Zim reached out to him. This time, Dib took the offered hand and let Zim help him up. Once he was securely back up on his feet, Zim carefully looked him over again, inspecting his head and antennae. Satisfied the other was undamaged he dropped down to his own feet and threw his arms around Dib's waist.

 

“Z-Zim??” Dib blinked, unsure of what to do as he looked down at the other irken, who was just tall enough to press his cheek against Dib’s chest.

 

“As I said before, Dib”, he murmured from his spot and tightened his hold around Dib’s waist. “You’re all Zim has.”

 

As touched as he was baffled by his companion’s confession, Dib sighed and wrapped his arms around Zim, returning the embrace. After that close call, it even felt good to just hold someone and be held.

 

 

***


	10. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am not apologizing for this. :-D 
> 
> Enjoy!

# Chapter 9

 

The two irkens were settled in the shadow cast by the Voot Runner, their backs resting up against it as they waited for it to be ready to fly again, when Dib’s tummy rumbled.

 

“Heh, sorry… I guess I’m getting hungry now…”

 

“Oh,” Zim hopped up and crawled into the spacecraft and rummaged through a compartment, then returned with his prize. “Here, try this.” He held a bag with Irken script out to Dib.

 

Dib shrunk back. “...What is _that?”_

 

Zim tore the bag open. “Irken Licky-Sticks,” he answered, taking out one of the two small brown sticks and offered it to Dib. “They’re like candy.”

 

Taking it hesitantly between his fingers, Dib gave it a suspicious look over. “Do you expect me _eat_ this?”

 

Zim had taken the other stick out and gave it a lick. “Mmm-hmm, it’s good.”

 

Dib continued to eye it nervously. “Are you sure it won't hurt me?”

 

Zim dipped his stick in the bag, then withdrew it and put it in his mouth, sucking a purple substance off. “Dib, you’re biologically Irken too, or did you forget about that already?” He dipped his stick back in.

 

“I don't know,” Dib sighed, still feeling unsure about the alien treat.

 

Zim gave a shrug. “Anyway, I don't see how it could be bad for hyoomans, so you're safe either way.”

 

“Ok, I guess,” Dib murmured, finally giving in and taking a lick. “Hey, you’re right, this _does_ taste like candy.” He took another curious lick, trying to determine what it tasted like other than sweet, despite the colour, it wasn't chocolate. “Man, I can't believe I’m actually eating _alien candy_ and it even tastes _good!”_

 

Zim shook his head with a smirk and held the bag out to Dib. “Here.”

 

“What’s that?”

 

Zim regarded the bag for a moment. “It’s kinda like syrup. Just try it, like this.” he dipped his stick in again and sucked it clean.

 

“Oh, well, I guess I am going to have to get used to this _sometime_.” He dipped his stick in, then tentatively licked at the substance with the tip of his tongue. It wasn't bad either and had a different flavour from the stick. He wasn't sure what the flavour was, but it distantly reminded him of some kind of exotic fruit. He smiled at Zim. “Thanks.”

 

Zim nodded and the two continued eating, dipping their sticks and sucking the syrup off.

 

“Hmm, I guess I won't be able to eat much human food anymore, huh?” Dib suddenly realized.

 

Zim shook his head, now just sucking on his stick as though it was a lollypop.

 

“Do you think you can teach me what foods I _can_ eat? I don't want to accidentally get meat seared to my skin or something.”

 

“You know, if you’re going to keep asking for favours from Zim, you're going to have to start offering something in exchange.”

 

“Wait, seriously?” Dib cried turning on his companion. “You’d actually leave me stranded in this new body on a planet full of dangers?? Don't you even feel a little bit responsible for my safety and well-being now??”

 

Zim met his gaze. “That doesn't mean I can't ask anything in return.”

 

Dib blinked. “Oh…” Zim kind of had a point, whether he liked admitting it or not. He settled back in his spot and looked down at his hands, the Licky-Stick in his right. “I just don't know what I could give you.” Then he did think of something. “Say, what about Tak’s ship? That is, if my dad didn't get rid of it or something...”

 

“No, Dib, you can keep it.”

 

“Well, then what else do you want? Should I just buy you lunch for the rest of your life?”

 

Zim laughed, an honest, even warm laugh. “No, no, Dib, as said, I can afford my own food.”

 

“Then what DO you want?”

 

“I…” Zim cast his gaze down, his antennae laying down against his head. “I want you to be my friend, Dib.”

 

“Y-your friend?” Dib repeated, certain he couldn't have heard correctly. “ _You_ want _me_ to be your _friend?”._

 

“Yes, Dib,” Zim replied softly. “And maybe someday even… my _best_ friend.”

 

Dib looked at his companion, his former rival and arch-enemy, and blinked as it occurred to him how lonely Zim must've felt here after all these years away from home.

 

“How come you never returned to your home? After you dropped your mission?”

 

“No, Dib,” Zim protested. “Do you agree to be my friend?”

 

Dib sighed. “Aren't we already?”

 

Zim looked up at him, wide-eyed. “You mean you think we _are_ friends?”

 

Dib couldn't help feeling both startled and let down at those words. “Well… D-did you think we’re still enemies?”

 

“I… I don't know. I don't know how Earth friendships work.”

 

“Oh…” That made sense to Dib. “How do Irkens make friends then?”

 

Zim shrugged. “I don't think I know anything about that either.”

 

Dib flinched, finding Zim’s words painful. Suddenly overcome with emotion, he nervously reached out and slid his arm around Zim’s shoulders.

 

“Well, then I guess we can try to figure out how friendships work together.” He looked down to Zim, hoping desperately that he didn't sound as awkward or stupid as he thought he did.

 

Zim, however, was looking up wide-eyed. “S-so does that mean we’re friends now?”

 

“Yes, Zim. We’re friends now,” he affirmed as the other apparently needed to have it said before he could accept it as official.

 

Zim smiled, not a huge one, but an honest one. Then he reached up and touched the hand Dib still had wrapped around him. “And do friends do that too?”

 

Dib suddenly felt embarrassed. “S-sometimes?” He desperately hoped he could cover up with that, instead of coming out of this looking even stupider.

 

Zim, however, slipped his arm around Dib’s waist, apparently happy with that answer.

 

“I really hope no one is around to see us like this…”

 

“I don't really care, we can just say we’re in costume for that sci-fi thing in Las Vegas,” Zim replied.

 

“That wasn't actually what I meant, but it’s a good point too…” Dib considered it. “We should probably put our disguises back on… if they aren't ruined.” And if they could find them. Dib had no idea what had happened to their wigs or contacts.

 

“So, you mean you don't want anyone to see us with our arms around each other?”

 

Now Dib felt bad again and couldn't bring himself to meet Zim’s eyes. “Y-yeah… sorry…”

 

“Do you want to stop?”

 

“No.” He really didn't. He enjoyed the surprisingly comforting feel of holding the alien and being held by him.

 

Zim chuckled softly. “Me neither, Dib.”

  


***

  


“Engines are back online - Windshield repaired - diagnostic checks complete - all systems functional,” the computer suddenly announced, interrupting the moment and causing them to jump. “Ergo, we can _leave_ now.”

 

“Oh. Good, Computer,” Zim replied.

 

The two detangled their arms from each other and got to their feet.

 

Dib stretched and stumbled, feeling lightheaded. He reached out and braced himself on the Voot Cruiser, while Zim gave the craft another exterior inspection, hoisting himself up with his spider legs so he could see the top as well.

 

When he was feeling better, Dib bent down and picked up the empty wrapper that had contained his very first ever alien meal and put it in his pocket, then walked around the Voot Cruiser too.

 

He saw the dent where it had been hit. “I didn't realise normal cars or trucks could do this to something that can fly in space,” he commented apologetically.

 

Zim peered down at him from over the Voot Cruiser. “They can't, but this one wasn't normal.”

 

Dib looked back up. “It wasn't?”

 

“The Voot Cruiser seems to have a vulnerability to your Earth bees and I’ve never been able to fix it,” Zim explained looking as baffled as Dib was.

 

“Bees,” Dib repeated and scratched his head. “We got hit by _bees_ on the freeway?”

 

“No, just a vehicle that was painted like a bee.”

 

Dib gawked up at him. “But that doesn't even make sense!”

 

Zim placed his hands on the Voot Cruiser’s roof. “After the Megadoomer, are you really still that surprised when Irken technology doesn't make sense to you?”

 

“Well, the Megadoomer only being able to cloak itself kinda makes sense.” Then he shuffled his feet. “On some level, anyway…”

 

“Well, logical or not, here we are.” Zim lowered himself into the cockpit and retracted his spider legs. “Ready to go?”

 

Back inside something that was vulnerable to _bees?_ Dib wasn't so sure about that; but he made up his mind and exhaled. “Yeah.” Then climbed in and sat down beside Zim.

 

Once started and set, Zim piloted it back onto the freeway and they resumed their journey.

 

“Can we stop for food?”

 

“Of course.” Zim fingered the panel, bringing the virtual map up. He raised his hand and swiped it, searching along the road ahead, shaking his head as he did so. “Computer, locate a tolerable hyooman eating establishment?”

  


***

  


Zim parked the Voot Cruiser before a cozy, little restaurant in a small city just off the freeway.

 

When he’d cut the motor, the two exchanged concerned glances. “Think you can handle it?” Zim asked.

 

They had their disguises on and Dib was trying his best to keep his antennae under control.

 

“I don’t know…” he admitted, feeling more than a little uneasy.

 

Zim regarded him carefully. “I think you’ll do fine, Dib, but if you want, I can just go in alone and bring it back.”

 

“But I promised to treat you this time, remember?”

 

“We could go in and just have it packed and eat in the Voot Cruiser.”

 

Dib considered it and his antennae raised, causing his wig to slide off and land in his lap. He looked down and sighed, dejected.

 

“Dib?”

 

“I can't do it… If I go in, it’s just too much of a risk…”

 

He looked up when he felt the other’s hand on his shoulder.

 

“You will learn, Dib,” Zim said softly.

 

A small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth and he reached up and placed his hand over Zim’s. “Thanks.”

 

“I’ll go in and you can treat me another time,” Zim told him.

 

“Ok,” he gave in and nodded, squeezing Zim’s hand softly before placing his own back in his lap.

 

“What do you want me to get for you?”

 

“I don’t know… Whatever you’re having, I guess.”

 

“Ok, Dib.” Zim retreated and left the Voot Cruiser.

 

Dib watched him go, then sunk down in the seat, looking at his wig and letting out a sigh in aggravation. He put the wig on, attempting to keep it in place. If he could just keep his antennae still long enough that if anyone walked by, he wouldn't give himself away, he’d consider it a success.

  


***

  


Zim hopping in next to him roused him from his thoughts, as well as rousing his antennae and his wig fell into his lap again. Huffing at it, he looked up to see what Zim had to report.

 

The other irken looked happy as he held up a bag.

 

“Looks like you were able to find something,” Dib observed as he placed his wig back on his head.

 

“Yes, Zim was good!” He opened the bag and pulled something out, which was wrapped in paper. “Since you liked burgers, I found a vegan one.” He held it out to Dib.

 

Dib unwrapped it and lifted the bun to see what was in it. “You really think I can eat this?” He wasn't sure he liked the looks of the patty, for it appeared to him to be a ground meat one.

 

“Hmm…” Zim murmured thoughtfully, reached in the bag and took out a second, which he unwrapped to reveal it to be just like Dib’s, then took a bite, chewing slowly and carefully. After he’d swallowed, he looked up and shrugged. “Seems fine.”

 

Feeling touched that Zim had checked that it was safe for him like that, he nodded and placed the bun back over his, then tried a bite. It tasted surprisingly good, though he could tell the patty wasn't made of ground beef, but, most importantly, didn't cause him any misery. However, his tongue made it all trickier than it should've been and it would certainly take him some time to get used to it. So, he ate slowly and deliberately as he tried to work out what was the most practical way to utilize the strange appendage.

 

He realized Zim was watching him with mild bewilderment. “What?” he asked when he’d managed to swallow his bite, though was pretty sure he must’ve been making weird faces.

 

“Is it not good, that hyooman food?”

 

Dib looked at his burger and shook his head. “No, it’s fine. - I-I’m just… not used to my tongue...”

 

“Oh,” Zim replied, then shrugged. “Well, it’s probably best if you just try not to think about it.”

 

Dib looked over at him. “Oh?”

 

“Because you don’t seem to have had any trouble speaking.”

 

“Oh!” Dib blinked. “Y-you're right!”

 

“Naturally.”

 

Dib ignored his companion’s inflated ego and turned back to his burger, taking another bite and trying to just eat normally. As soon as he’d managed to take his focus off of it, he discovered his tongue seemed to know what it was supposed to do and eating became a much easier task.

 

As he ate, Zim only nibbled at his burger before ultimately wrapping it back up and putting it in the bag, taking out a donut instead. Dib couldn't help watching for a moment as his companion appeared to enjoy it.

  


***

  


Hours passed and they'd made rather good progress on their trip. Now that he wasn't sick and taking medication, Dib was able to even enjoy the scenery for once, which he was delighted about. Even with all the difficulties and differences his strange new alien body had brought with it, he could enjoy a quality of life he hadn't in years.

 

When Zim pulled the Voot Cruiser into a parking space in front of a motel - this one decidedly nicer than the one they’d stayed in before - it had grown dark out.

 

“You’re tired?” Dib asked his companion.

 

“I’m not, but I think you need a rest,” Zim replied as he cut the engines.

 

About to protest, Dib realised he was indeed weary and capitulated. “Yeah, ok… Let’s go check it out.”

 

Not needing another word, Zim hopped out of the craft and, pulling on his wig, Dib followed.

 

They went inside to the lobby and, indeed, this one looked to be of a finer standard than the other, probably the price too, Dib figured.

 

At the front desk a young woman was bent over her smartphone and didn't seem to notice them when they walked up. Dib knew this was rather unprofessional, but he liked the look of the place enough to let it slide; besides, it could be important for all he knew.

 

Zim, however, didn't seem to share his sentiments and tapped impatiently on the counter.

 

She looked up. “Oh! I didn't see you two come in-”

 

“Or hear the bell,” Zim muttered under his breath.

 

Turning fully to them, Dib could now see her name tag, which read ‘Molly’. “- I’m sorry. You want a room, so which one?”

 

“Yes, just a simple one with two beds - and thick walls, _very thick walls,”_ Zim replied.

 

Molly looked slightly startled, then amused. “Big plans, I see,” she chuckled.

 

Zim simply shrugged, while Dib had to grab hold of his wig to hold it in place, blushing furiously.

 

“Well, I think I’ve got just the thing,” she continued, taking out a book and flipping through it. “Room number 27 has two double beds and a bathtub, as well as a nice view of the swimming pool.”

 

Zim looked to Dib. “Sound good to you?”

 

Not even daring to meet anyone’s eyes, he kept his gaze firmly fixed on the floor near Zim’s feet. “Uh… s’fine,” was all he could manage to squeak out in his mortification.

 

“Ok, that’s $86 a night, checkout is 2 in the afternoon. How many nights?”

 

“Just one,” Zim replied, taking money out of his PAK.

 

“Cash or credit card?”

 

Zim placed the cash on the table as an answer.

 

“Ok, then I just need your name please?”

 

“Zim.”

 

She took out a pen. “Two for 27, one night, cash, Mr. Zim,” she murmured aloud as she wrote, then slid the book over to Zim. “If you’d just sign here please.”

 

Zim took the pen and did so.

 

“Excellent. We also serve a complimentary breakfast to your room from 7 to 11am. Just dial room service to order.” She picked up the money and handed Zim the key card.

 

“Thank you.”

 

“Have a good night, you two.”

 

Zim and Dib returned to the Voot Cruiser to grab their bags, then went to find their room. It was on the second floor and Zim unlocked it. Inside, Dib set his wig on the dresser and looked around. He was indeed impressed, for it was very nice, the beds dressed with beautiful, royal blue sheets and sky blue comforters. Even chocolates were placed on the pillows. There was also a TV and Dib guessed it had cable or satellite.

 

Furthermore, it had a small balcony with two chairs, which did overlook the pool, he discovered opening the door and stepping out.

 

Now undisguised, Zim joined him outside and they observed a playful couple cuddling and kissing in the pool.

 

“I certainly hope these walls are the _thickest walls ever,”_ Zim grumbled, then shook his head and went back inside.

 

Dib followed him a moment later and, wanting to take off his jacket, approached Zim. “Uh, can you help me with my PAK again? I want to change…”

 

“Yes, but it’s not hard, Dib,” he took Dib’s hand and brought it to a spot on the PAK. “Just tap twice.”

 

Dib did so and it fell away. This time, a clock popped up in his head, but didn't start ticking down. “Why isn't it counting down?”

 

Zim held it out to him. “Because _you_ took it off willingly.”

 

“Oh… ok…”

 

“It _will_ eventually start counting down, so you can’t just leave it off forever, but you have some time,” Zim explained, gently holding the PAK away from himself so as not to end up its next target. "Enables you to make repairs."

 

“Ok,” Dib nodded and took off his jacket, hanging it up, then removed his shirt. He inspected them for damage, but found nothing. “Wait a sec… How does it attach into my spine, if it doesn't tear my clothes?”

 

Zim shrugged. “I don't really know, it just doesn't.”

 

“You didn't build it?”

 

“No. PAK technology is far too advanced even for Zim. Only the Control Brains know how they’re built.”

 

“Oh.” Dib laid his shirt on the bed farthest from the balcony and rummaged through his bag until he found a nightshirt.

 

After he'd pulled that on, he went back over for his PAK, which attached to him instantly. He sighed, still not liking the feeling of it attaching itself to his spine, and went back to his bag to pull out pyjama pants as well, then slipped into the bathroom with them, closing the door behind him.

 

As they’d been promised, the bath was large, actually one of those corner bathtubs. Dib regarded it with wistful sadness, for that was a luxury he’d never again be able to enjoy, then changed into the other pants.

 

When he exited, Zim was sitting on the bed nearest the balcony, looking out the window into the night sky. Dib joined him, taking a seat beside him.

 

“Do you miss your home on Irk a lot?”

 

“Not really,” Zim replied quietly. “I’ve always wanted to be an Invader, an Irken Elite, moving from planet to planet as assigned, not stuck somewhere to rot for the rest of my life.”

 

Dib sighed. “Then why didn’t you ever go back?”

 

Zim shrugged. “Maybe I will one day.”

 

Dib looked down, not sure he liked the prospect of Zim going away, but not wanting to be unsupportive of his companion. He felt Zim slip his arm around his waist.

 

“Would you come with me, if I did?”

 

Dib blinked and glanced at Zim. “W-with you into… outer space? To your home world?”

 

Zim shrugged. “Maybe just a… road trip. I don't know what you’d want on Irk.”

 

Dib looked up at the sky, imagining what it would be like to travel through space with Zim, to see worlds and races he never could have dreamed of. He liked that idea. “Yeah, I’d go.” He was still curious about the planet, Irk, to see where a creature like Zim would have been born, raised, and trained. “What is Irk like?”

 

“Much less water,” Zim replied. “Most people never get to spend time on the surface, only the most elite of us.”

 

“Hmm, that’s weird.”

 

Zim got up and closed the curtains, then turned and crawled on the bed, standing up behind him, then placed his hands on his shoulders and squeezed. “You should try to relax.” He traced a line with his fingertip along Dib’s neck to his cheek.

 

Dib shivered as chills ran up his spine. “Well, it’s kinda hard to relax with you-” His voice caught in his threat as Zim touched his one of his antennae. He shrunk away.

 

“Oh, come, Dib”, Zim purred. “I won’t hurt you. Just enjoy it.”

 

Dib bit his lip as Zim gently caressed the length of one, then the other, causing him to shiver.

 

“Now, does that hurt?”

 

Dib gulped and shook his head once, pain was definitely not the word he’d use to describe it!

 

Zim’s other hand joined in and he began caressing and teasing both, while Dib helplessly dug his fingers into the covers as delicious sensations ran through his body and caused his breath to hitch in his throat.

 

He closed his eyes, not wanting to fight Zim anymore, regardless of whether this was right or not, and the other irken seemed obliged to continue.

 

“That’s better,” Zim breathed near his ear hole. “They’ve been through so much today, just let go and enjoy.”

 

At the moment, Dib wasn’t able to do otherwise and just tried not to lose his balance and fall right off the bed as he wavered in place. Zim seemed to notice this for he stopped his ministrations and slipped his arms under Dib’s, picking him right up and settling down near the pillows with him in his lap. Before Dib could make a move to escape, Zim’s hands were back at his antennae, working their magic and sending ripples of pleasure through him.

 

Soon, all Dib could do was rest his head against Zim’s chest, eyes closed tight, and pant. Each touch and caress of his tender organs bringing his heart to pound and his blood to rush.

 

“Ziiiiimmm…” he panted, but words had left him and he could only squirm in pleasure.

 

Zim paused, holding the delicate antennae softly between his fingers. “Do you want me to stop, Dib?”

 

Having the pleasure suddenly cease, left Dib blinking and feeling quite neglected. His antennae twitched against Zim’s fingers urging for more and causing a few delightful little sensations, but not enough. “I-I…” He realized his mouth was dry and he had to swallow a few times before he could do anything but croak hoarsely. “No… doooon’t stooop… please...”

 

“Ok, Dib.” And he rewarded him by resuming, this time a little faster, but still as gentle.

 

Dib gasped and grit his teeth, losing himself in the feelings, his skin growing hot and his muscles flexing. He was positive that by the time Zim stopped, he was going to be nothing but a green puddle of irken goo.

 

 _Or explode!,_ he realised as the other’s touch wraught a gasping moan from his lips, to which his face heated up with embarrassment. This didn't daunt his companion in the least, instead Zim increased his speed.

 

“Z-Zim…!” Dib panted, then grit his teeth tightly again. Yes, there was going to be a mess, he knew it; but much as he wanted to warn the other of possible consequences and suggest they stop, he couldn't bring himself to.

 

Again a moan escaped unbidden from his lips and his blush grew deeper. Zim seemed to take that one as encouragement as well.

 

This continued and soon, Dib was sure he could see stars and galaxies behind his eyelids, the pleasure mounting until he didn't think he could stand it anymore. “Ziiiimmm….” he moaned helplessly.

 

“Yes, Dib, very good,” Zim purred against his head. “Enjoy it.”

 

Dib moaned again.

 

“Yes, Dib!”

 

He squirmed against Zim, shivering and tensing in stops and starts. “Z-Zim… I… I…” His mouth closed as the sensations grew stronger again, searing him to the core and forming a pulsing knot in his abdomen.

 

“Oh, yes, Dib, just like that!”

 

Dib cried out as a sudden and powerful surge of pleasure overtook him, his whole body tensing as it exploded and he trembled with it.

 

When it let up after a few strong surges, he went limp, collapsing back against the other and trying to catch his breath again. Zim gave his now over-stimulated antennae one last caress, causing them to jump away, then slipped his arms around Dib, resting them on his heaving chest.

 

 _"Now_ you are relaxed,” he purred, a pleased lilt to his voice.

  


***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was the funnest naughty scene I've ever written. No silly Victorian romance novel style terms for body parts. XD


	11. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that took a while, I've been rather busy and stressed with life.

#  Chapter 10

 

_ “Now you are relaxed.” _

 

Dib blushed harder at his companion’s words and kept his eyes shut. “I swear, I’ll never be able to look at you  _ again _ ,” he muttered.

 

“Why not? It is good for Dibs to look at Zim.” He wiped the beads of sweat from Dib's brow affectionately.

 

Dib opened his eyes to find Zim bent over him, grinning. “Is it normal on Irk to just… rub a friend’s antennae until they explode screaming?”

 

Zim giggled, but shrugged and traced the curve of Dib’s cheek. “I don't know. I’ve never had, nor wanted or needed, a friend before. - But I knew you’d enjoy it. - Or  _ didn't _ you? Did you hate it?”

 

“Well…” he began, not wanting to admit he had enjoyed it  _ immensely _ , but knowing denial was futile at this point.

 

“Come on, tell Zim! Was it  _ really _ so  _ horribly _ unpleasant?” Zim pressed, ruby eyes large with question.

 

“No…” he muttered, surrendering. “It was… nice…”

 

Zim smiled and drew his finger lightly along the edge of Dib’s mouth. “There, you see?”

 

“I’m  _ still _ never going to look at you again.” He shut his eyes to show it and heard the other chuckle. Shortly, another thought occurred to him. “Oh, and you’re going to have to tell me how Irkens clean themselves if they can’t bathe in water.”

 

“Oh? Why’s that?”

 

“Because I’m a mess!” Dib snapped, feeling even more mortified than before.

 

“You’re a mess? You look fine to Zim.”

 

He opened his eyes to see Zim grinning. “My  _ pants _ are a mess, thanks to you!” he cried, loathing Zim for making him actually spell it out. “And don't pretend you don't know what I’m talking about!”

 

Zim laughed. “Well, if it really bothers you that much, you can use some Irken Cleansing Chalk.”

 

“Irken Cleansing Chalk?” He tilted his head to try and see Zim better.

 

Zim nodded. “I have some in my bag… But you could just stay here and sleep now.”

 

Dib sat up, pulling away from the other Irken. “Just get me the chalk…” he insisted as he stood up to examine himself, then glanced back to Zim. _“Now,_ please?”

 

Zim got up and procured it for him, opening the wrapper and showing the bar to him. “You just wipe over the messy areas.”

 

Dib nodded and took it, then slipped off to the bathroom, closing the door behind him. He set the chalk next to the sink, then went to work peeling his soiled pants off himself. 

 

He cleaned himself up with the chalk as Zim had instructed, discovering it actually worked spendedly. Then he realized he had a problem: In his hurry to get to the bathroom, he’d neglected to fetch a fresh set of clothes.

 

He wrapped a towel around his waist and opened the door. “Zim?”

 

The other Irken was sitting on the edge of his bed, checking something in his tablet computer, and looked up. “Yes, Dib?”

 

Dib looked down, feeling his cheeks grow hot. “Could you bring me my bag, please?”

 

Zim hopped up and grabbed it, then brought it over to him. “Here.”

 

“Thanks,” he said as he took it, then retreated back in the bathroom and closed the door.

 

He rummaged for an extra pair of underwear and some pants he could sleep in, finding a pair of pyjama shorts. He pulled them on and slipped out of the bathroom, choosing to leave his soiled clothing on the side of the tub, to worry about in the morning.

 

As he came out, Zim was on his bed tapping on his tablet. Dib sighed, knowing he had to face him sooner or later and he’d rather sooner than later, so approached the bed. “Zim? Y-you know that what happened -” he looked down and rubbed his arms nervously. “- was wrong, right?”

 

Zim looked up. “Wrong? What was wrong about it?”

 

Dib glanced up quickly, then back down. “It’s just…” This was harder than he’d thought and now he didn't know what to say.

 

“Are you mad at Zim?”

 

He sighed, feeling simply drawn to his companion. “...No… I-I’m not mad…”

 

Zim smiled and held his arms out invitingly.

 

He found that he wanted to just cuddle up with the other Irken. “What am I going to do with you?” he wondered allowed, shaking his head, and crawled up on the bed, settling down next to him and snuggled up. “Of course I’m not mad at you.”

 

“I didn't do it with the intentions of upsetting you,” Zim murmured, wrapping an arm around him and squeezing.

 

Dib shrugged and laid his head against Zim’s chest. “I know. It was just weird and…unexpected,” he explained quietly, then reached up and pulled on one of his antennae. “I-I didn't know these things would be like that.”

 

Setting his tablet on the nightstand, Zim laid his hand over Dib’s, then gently pried his fingers apart, freeing the captured appendage. “Now you do.”

 

Dib sighed and closed his eyes, feeling embarrassed again. “I was stupid, wasn't I?”

 

“Heh??”

 

“You know, when I… when you… to my antennae... and-and then I… and I liked it… and then I… You know?” he stammered, finding himself unable to express himself the way he wanted. “I looked so stupid.”

 

He felt Zim shake his head.

 

“You weren’t, Dib; you were a delight for Zim,” he purred and caressed Dib’s cheek. “I wanted you to enjoy it. - You should try and rest now, though.”

 

Dib was feeling quite spent. “But what about you? Don’t you want me to… to do that to you too now?”

 

“Not tonight, Dib. - Maybe someday, but only if you ever decide you  _ want _ to. - Now, try and rest.” Zim pulled the covers up over them.

 

“It's a good thing you asked for thick walls,” he observed, his cheeks growing red again over how loud he’d been. “And I guess we only needed one bed…”

 

“Oh, stop it. You weren't loud, Dib,” Zim admonished gently. “And no one else has to know we’re actually sharing a bed tonight.”

 

Dib smiled a little at Zim’s words. “Ok,” he murmured and snuggled tighter against him, yawning.

 

“Goodnight”, Zim whispered. “My little Irken.”

 

“Goodnight, Zim.”

  
  
  


***

  
  
  


Soft, classical music playing from a radio met his ears as Dib awakened to find himself cuddled up to Zim, who was awake with tablet in hand working on something. Confused as to why this was so, but too groggy to put much thought into it, he stretched and yawned, inhaling his companion’s pleasant scent.

 

“Morning, Dib,” Zim greeted him warmly. “Sleep well?”

 

Deciding he’d worry about figuring things out after his brain was fully awake, Dib yawned again, then scooted up so that he could see what Zim was up to. “Yeah. - What are you doing?” Unfortunately, the text was in Irken Script and he’d never learned to read it.

 

“Just researching. It's become my most common pastime in the last three years, so I can better learn to act like a believable hyooman wormbaby.”

 

"Oh..." Glancing around the room, Dib realised it was dark out. “Did… did I sleep an entire day?” He certainly felt like he’d had a good night’s sleep.

 

“No, you slept about two hours.”

 

“Two hours??” he gasped in disbelief. “But I feel like I slept the whole night! Like at least eight hours!”

 

“That’s another upside to the PAK.” Then Zim set his tablet down and turned to Dib. “How do you feel?”

 

Dib considered it for a moment, before the pressure on his bladder registered fully. “Like I should probably… you know…  _ go…”  _ He pushed the covers down and crawled out of the bed, then stumbled his way to the bathroom, the cool air hitting his neck and feet was a stark contrast to the warmth he’d enjoyed moments later and caused him to shiver.

 

In the bathroom, he saw his soiled pants from the before and all at once remembered why he’d woken up next to Zim. A miserable groan escaped from him as his cheeks heated up.

 

He took care of himself and slipped back to the bedroom, shivering in the chilly air. He approached the bed, eyes cast down, and torn over whether or not to return to his warm spot with Zim or go hide in the other bed out of embarrassment.

 

As another shiver rippled through his body, warmth won out and he reminded himself that he could hardly pretend it hadn't happened anyway, so crawled back in and snuggled up, pulling the covers up over his head.

 

“Dib?”

 

“Dib’s not here,” he grumbled, pulling his face deeper under. He felt Zim shift and a hand slid over to him, stroking his cheek gently.

 

“Then where  _ is _ Dib?” Zim asked in an amused tone.

 

“In the Cocoon of Shame,” he muttered back, curling so he could bury his face against Zim’s side.

 

"Oh, Dib... -" Zim set his tablet on the nightstand and raised the covers so he could see Dib’s head. “- ...Are you _still_ troubled about before?”

 

Saying nothing, Dib just nodded against the other Irken and shrunk deeper underneath.

 

Zim pulled the covers down. “Well, don’t be.” He slid his hand under Dib’s chin and pressed lightly. “Come on, Dib, look at Zim?”

 

Dib shook his head.

 

Zim took one of Dib’s arms and, in a fluid movement, rolled him onto his back and straddled his tummy.

 

Dib looked up surprised and blushed furiously. “Hey!- What're you-”

 

“I _told_ you to look at Zim, now you _have_ to.” Zim slid his hand to Dib’s wrist, pinning it to the pillow and with his free arm, reached up to cup his cheek, caressing it affectionately with his thumb. “And now you will _listen_ to Zim very carefully: You have _nothing_ to be ashamed about before, Dib. _Nothing!_ ”

 

Dib froze, gulping. “But-but…”

 

Zim lowered his face to within mere inches of Dib’s. “ _ Nothing,” _ he repeated firmly and placed a finger to Dib’s lips. “So stop it.” Then raised his head to assess the effectiveness of his words and actions on his captive audience.

 

“But... it’s embarrassing,” Dib whined against the finger in protest, squirming beneath him.

 

Zim shook his head, removing the finger from Dib’s lips and placing hand on his shoulder instead. “It was precious.”

 

“ _ Precious??” _ Dib cried in consternation. “I spooged all over myself, Zim! That’s not  _ precious, _ that’s… that’s…  _ embarrassing!” _

 

Now Zim looked confused. “‘Spooged’?”

 

Dib blushed hard and gulped. “It-it’s when you… you… Oh,  _ you know!” _

 

Zim shook his head. “Is that some kind of disgusting hyooman thing?”

 

“I’m not going to say it! Just… look it up on the internet-  _ Wait! NO!  _ Don't do  _ that!”  _ he quickly caught himself. “Not-not the internet…”

 

Zim looked annoyed and had fixed him with a glare. “Dib, you’re not making any sense.”

 

“Do I  _ have _ to say it?” Dib whimpered helplessly.

 

“Just tell me what you’re talking about.”

 

“You made me mess the front of my pants at the end and I’m sorry about it but couldn't help it and now you hate me and I hate myself forever!” he blurted out to get it over with as fast as he could.

 

Zim blinked, then laughed. “Oh,  _ that!” _ He waved his hand dismissively and smiled down at him adoringly. “Quit fretting, I couldn't hate you for that. That was the  _ point.” _

 

“It  _ was?!” _ Dib cried accusingly. “You  _ knew _ that would happen?! You  _ wanted _ to do that to me??”

 

“Of  _ course _ I did! I wanted you to  _ relax, _ remember?”

 

Stunned beyond words, Dib just gaped at him. He couldn't believe the other had not only known  _ full well _ what he was doing, but that it had also been his intent.

 

After thinking about it for a while, Dib shut his eyes and made a face. “I thought you just wanted to be  _ friends.” _

 

Above him, the other Irken stiffened and when he looked up, Zim looked as though he’d been punched. 

 

“Zim?”

 

“I-I  _ did…” _ Zim replied in a stricken voice. “A-aren’t we still?”

 

Dib felt guilty again. “Well… friends don't usually do that to friends.”

 

Zim twitched, shrinking back. “T-they don't?”

 

Dib shook his head.

 

“Wouldn’t a friend want to help their friends to relax after a rough day?”

 

“Well,  _ y-yes, _ but… not  _ that _ way.”

 

Zim sighed, sadly.

 

Dib tried to move his arms, but the Irken still had the one pinned. He settled for raising the free one to touch Zim’s arm. “Well, um…”

 

Zim looked up. “Is that what  _ best _ friends do?”

 

“Not-” Dib paused, giving it a little more thought. “Well, ‘best friends  _ with benefits’  _ do…” he had to admit.

 

Zim considered this, scratching his chin with his free hand, the other still pinning Dib’s in place. “Zim has heard this term before…” Then he looked down at Dib curiously. “Well, why don’t we be that then?”

 

_ “What?!”  _ Dib nearly choked on his tongue. Zim wanted to be that with him and… and do more of that with him… and probably even more  _ than _ that?? Did Zim even  _ realise _ what he was asking?? He doubted it.

 

“Well, I just thought if we have to be ’best friends with benefits’ in order for me to actually take care of you now, then we should be that.”

 

Dib tried again to move his arm, he wanted to sit up. “Zim, I know you probably don't understand this, but… but…”

 

“But what?”

 

He ceased his attempts to get free and just looked up at Zim. “It’s not…  _ I’m _ not… Well, you don't usually do this with other men...” he trailed off, not sure how to explain it to Zim. He tried to think of something else. “D-do Irkens… not care about genders?”

 

Zim rewarded him by looking even more confused. “You mean that male/female skool thing you mentioned?”

 

Dib nodded. “Well, sort of. I mean not co-ed skools!” he added quickly. “I mean… Do you actually, um… does gender not matter in relationships? - And would you let me up, already!?” he yanked at his hand.

 

Zim listened intently, watching him carefully while, and considering his words, but didn't move his hand. “Hmm… So you actually care about all that?  _Why?? _ Tell Zim now!”

 

“Because I’m  _ not _ gay!” Dib snapped, more than a little frustrated that Zim wasn't letting him go and frustrated that he couldn’t actually get free with force.

 

“You aren't…  _ happy?” _ Zim asked in a worried tone.

 

“What? No, not  _ happy-  _ I don't mean-”

 

“Then ZIM will make you gayer than you’ve ever been!”

 

Dib groaned, then grit his teeth. “That's what I’m  _ afraid _ of…” he muttered under his breath. “Damnit, Zim!” he snapped, trying to yank his arm away, but instantly giving up as soon as he noticed it still couldn't move. “I don't mean ‘happy’, I mean  _ homosexual!  _ I’m  _ not _ homosexual!”

 

Zim blinked and looked down at him, startled. _ “ _ Wait,  _ that’s  _ your problem? Because you think it’s  _ bad _ because we’re both males??”

 

“I do,” Dib stated resolutely, feeling both embarrassed and frustrated. “Isn't it the same on Irk?!” he spat angrily, his chest heaving in frustration.

 

Zim held him in place, looking down at him and rolling his eyes. “Oh, puh-lease! That’s a ridiculously outdated concept, Dib!”

 

“Well, here on Earth it isn't, Zim! And I’m not! - And if you don't let me up already, I’m going to-” His spider suddenly legs shot out of his PAK, taking their places on the floor at either side of the bed giving him leverage, and he rose up with Zim on top of him.

 

He gasped as he looked up at Zim, shocked by what he'd done, then raised his head, so he was level with him. The other Irken was, however, grinning from ear-to-ear and his own spider legs were extended, keeping him in place against Dib.

 

“Wow, you really HAVE figured those out!”

 

“W-what?! I-I didn't mean to, I-”

 

Zim smiled even more. “I  _ knew _ you were amazing, Dib!”

 

“I-I…” he didn't know how he did it, nor did he think it was amazing at all. He was angry at himself for losing it in frustration.

 

Zim just looked happy. “You're going to make a great Irken, Dib.”

 

Dib lowered himself back to the bed and his legs retreated into his PAK. “I didn't know I could do that… I didn't mean to…”

 

Zim followed him, settling back down on top of him as he had been before. “You are,” he purred. “They're second nature to you.”

 

Dispute the whole fiasco, Dib realised that his wrist was  _ still _ in the other Irken’s grip. He sighed in submission.

 

“But now, Dib,” Zim began, bending down so their faces were near. “You don't have to apply some silly label to yourself just because you have fun with me.”

 

Dib bit his lip.

 

“Homosexuality means you're only attracted to males, but playing with Zim doesn't mean you can’t still be attracted to other genders.”

 

Dib stared up at him, finding that his companion’s words made a lot of sense, he sighed. “Zim, would you please let me up?” he asked quietly.

 

“Of course, Dib,” Zim retreated and settled down beside him, his back against the headboard. “Just don't hide from me anymore, ok?”

 

Dib nodded and sat up, glad to finally be back in control of his arm. He settled down next to Zim and looked down at him. “Zim, I-I have to tell you something...”

 

Zim looked up. “Yes, Dib?”

 

Dib rubbed his arms self-consciously. “The-the problem is that I… I don't know what I’m really attracted to. It mostly seems like I’m not attracted to either gender and that’s why I-I’ve never done anything like this with anyone before.” His gaze fell to his lap.

 

“Hmm…” Zim scratched his chin thoughtfully, then looked up grinning cutely. “Well, that’s even better because you can be  _ ZIMsexual!” _

 

Dib hid his face in his hands.

  
  
  


***

  
  


 

After they’d had breakfast and checked out, they made their way to the Voot Cruiser and loaded their bags in the rear compartment, then proceeded back on their way.

 

Once they were on the freeway and Zim had engaged the autopilot, he removed a wallet from his PAK, checking inside and making a face.

 

“Something wrong?” Dib asked concerned.

 

“We’re going to have to stop at a monies machine if we want lunch later…” he murmured, folding up the wallet and placing it back in his PAK, then leaned back against the seat.

 

Dib nodded and laid back too, then changing his mind, cuddled up to the other Irken, receiving at first a surprised look, then a smile and an arm around his shoulders. He snuggled up a little tighter, getting comfortable by resting his head in the crook of Zim’s shoulder and collarbone.

 

“Mmm,” Zim purred, reaching out and taking one of Dib’s hands and held it against his chest, giving it an affectionate squeeze. “Tired already?”

 

Dib shook his head slightly. “Just… I don't know… Is it ok?”

 

“You’re always welcome to come to Zim.”

 

Dib closed his eyes and inhaled Zim’s scent as a thought occurred to him. “When we stop, I should probably call my dad. If I tell him you're not an alien, that I was just insane all these years, maybe it’ll make him happy.”

 

Zim caressed his hand in response, then suddenly leaned forward. “What is  _ that? _ \- Computer, identify!”

 

“It would appear as though Earth police are blocking the road,” it responded.

 

At that, Dib sat up and looked as well. Sure enough, there seemed to be a couple patrol cars stopping people. Alarmed, he placed his hand on Zim’s arm. “W-we should probably turn around!”

 

Zim touched the controls and the Voot Cruiser slowed, then he pulled over to the side of the road and stopped. “Computer, can you tell me what they’re up to?”

 

“They are talking.”

 

Zim glared at the dashboard. “And what are they talking  _ about?”  _ he hissed.

 

“They seem to be warning people of... something.”

 

“Are they a danger to us?”

 

“Hardly.”

 

Zim scratched his chin in thought, then pulled out their wigs and contacts, handing Dib’s to him.

 

“What??” Dib cried as he took his wig. “Are you crazy?!”

 

“We’re just going to go and see what they’re up to,” Zim explained, putting his disguise on.

 

“We can't let them see us! They’ll know!”

 

Zim turned to him. “Dib, I’ve fooled skool nurses, Swollen Eyeball agents, your paranormal investigator, and mall security guards with my disguise. I don't think a few police officers are going to be a problem.”

 

Dib bit his lip and looked down, not feeling very reassured despite the truth of Zim’s words. “I’m scared, though,” he murmured meekly.

 

Zim reached out and touched his cheek, then slipped it under his chin, tilting his head up so he had to look at him. “It will be fine, Dib. Just trust me.”

 

“But what if-”

 

Zim placed his finger over Dib’s lips. “No buts,” he purred, leaning in close.

 

“But, Zim-”

 

Zim drew his hand away and leaned in until their lips brushed, then softly kissed Dib. “Shhhh, Dib, trust me,” he purred, lips still touching as he spoke. He drew back his head to assess his work.

 

Dib stared wide-eyed at him, frozen in his spot and too stunned to do anything but stammer.

 

Zim smiled. “Now that we’ve settled that, we go.” He turned back to the controls, keyed in a few commands, and resumed on their way.

 

Dib turned forward as well, blushing terribly, and with shaking hands tried to put his disguise on. He managed without poking himself in the eye while putting his contacts in, though Zim still reached over and adjusted the placement of his wig.

 

They approached the patrol cars and were flagged to stop, a slightly overweight policeman walked up and knocked on the windscreen, so Zim opened it.

 

“Can I help you, Officer?” he asked innocently.

 

The officer looked at the two, Dib still blushing. “Where are you boys headed?”

 

“Las Vegas. I promised him I’d take him to the sci-fi convention for his 18th birthday.” Zim winked and smiled cutely.

 

“Aw, well that’s just sweet. Alright, I just wanted to warn you that some convicts have escaped while being transported to the Pen, so be careful. They’re armed and dangerous and they've already attacked people near banks.”

 

“Of course, Officer, we’ll be careful.”

 

“Good, then you two have a good time at the convention and great job dressing up your car for the occasion, by the way.”

 

“Thank you, Officer. Have a nice day and keep up the good work keeping those streets safe for us.” Zim gave a wave.

 

The cop nodded and stepped back, then waved to his colleagues that they could pass.

 

“Wow,” Dib exhaled in relief once they were well past them.

 

Zim grinned wide as he turned on the autopilot. “I told you so! - _Say it!”_

 

Dib groaned. “I don't want to…”

 

“Come on! Is Zim not so  _ very _ worthy? - SAY IT TO ZIM,  _ NOW!” _

 

Dib sighed. “Fine! Zim is good,” he muttered.

 

“I can't hear you!”

 

“Zim is good!” he shouted, glaring.

 

“YES!” Zim laughed and raised his fists triumphantly.

 

Dib grit his teeth. “Can't believe you actually _kissed me…”_ He blinked as he realised he’d actually kind of liked it a litttle, then sighed and leaned back, eyes cast down at his hands.

 

Zim turned to him, still smirking. “Well, there’s plenty _more_ where that came from if you like,” he purred silkily, then laid back against the seat for a moment before he reached out and pulled the other Irken close, guiding him to rest his head on his shoulder. “There, that’s better, isn't it?”

 

Dib didn't protest and, in fact, snuggled closer, saying nothing.

  
  
  


***


	12. Chapter 11

# Chapter 11

 

They had left the highway and stopped to stretch their legs as they checked for an ATM.

 

“I’m glad you're starting to get braver about going out in public,” Zim commented as they walked down the street.

 

“Well, if I concentrate really hard and try not to react to anything, I seem to be able to keep my antennae down.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets and watched the ground ahead of him.

 

Zim patted him. “Someday, you won't even have to worry about that.”

 

Dib nodded, saying nothing as he followed Zim.

 

They turned a corner and walked to the back of the bank, then up to an ATM. Zim took out a card from his PAK and slid it into the slot. After quickly typing in his pincode, his account came up.

 

“‘Mr. ZiM A. LEON’..?” Dib read aloud, then turned on his companion. “What is _wrong_ with you?!”

 

“I couldn't create an account at your Earth banks without a full Earth name,” Zim pointed out. “And I saw it written on a card that said ‘UFO Driver’s licence’ in your room once.” He picked his desired sum and waited. “Hmmm, what do you say to IHOP for lunch?”

 

“When were you in my room?? Was it while I was away in boarding skool?!”

 

 _“So many times!_ \- Especially after you left! - And why didn't you leave a note saying where you’d gone?!”

 

“Why _would_ I?! I didn't know you'd actually come _looking_ for me!”

 

“I don't know, it’s your problem! - So, anyway, you and IHOP or No-HOP?”

 

Dib shook his head, sighing, but accepting the subject change. “You want pancakes for lunch?”

 

“No, better: Waffles!”

 

His card was then returned by the machine and Zim took it along with his money, counting it.

 

“I guess-”

 

Arms suddenly closed around his neck and waist from behind, cutting off his words.

 

“Hey!” he cried, his wig falling off as he was dragged backwards away from Zim and his captor held up a knife in front of his face threateningly.

 

Another man now leveled a handgun at Zim. “We’ll take that,” he growled. “Or your bald little boyfriend gets it!”

 

“GET YOUR FILTHY HANDS OFF MY DIB!” Zim bellowed, unimpressed by the weapon that had been drawn on him.

 

The one holding Dib tightened his arm on Dib’s neck, causing him to choke.

 

“Give us the money and maybe we will! - I’m warning you: This is an automatic!”

 

“Just hold in there, Dib. - And that is _not,_ you try to play ME for a fool?! Besides, I don't _care_ what it is! _Nobody_ steals from ZIM! And -” Zim’s eyes narrowed and he shifted his stance to a ready one. “- you two have just made a most _terrible mistake!”_ he hissed, stowing the money in his PAK as he rounded on them, glaring dangerously.

 

In a flash his spider legs shot out from his PAK, one knocking the gun from the attacker’s hands, while the person holding Dib suddenly screamed in pain, dropping both him and the knife at once.

 

Now raised imposingly up on three of his spider-legs, Zim glared triumphantly at them. “Very useful, those pathetic little Earth toys of yours, aren't they?!” he demanded as Dib fell to his knees on the sidewalk.

 

Dib gasped when he saw the red blood dripping from the point of one of Zim’s spider-legs.

 

“NOW GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE I RIP EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR SICK ORGANS RIGHT OUT OF YOUR SMELLY BAGS FULL OF MEATY CORN AND NOODLES YOU CALL BODIES!!!”

 

He took a few steps forward, pointing the dripping spider leg at them menacingly, and the men turned, stumbling over themselves to get away, one limping badly from the large gash Zim had already inflicted on his thigh.

 

_“You’re effin’ crazy, Man!”_

 

Zim went over to Dib. “Did they hurt you?”

 

Dib looked up and shook his head. “I-I don't think so…”

 

Zim lowered himself to the ground, cupping Dib’s cheeks and gently raising his head to inspect his throat.

 

“But ‘smelly bags of meaty corn and noodles’?” Dib repeated, giving Zim an incredulous look as he pulled on his wig. _“Really,_ Zim?”

 

“Hey, it worked, didn't it?” Zim gave him a lopsided grin and shrugged. “Anyway, I couldn't think of anything else.” He held his hand out to Dib.

 

“You’re _still_ so weird!” Dib giggled and took the offered hand, standing back up with Zim’s help; then Zim threw his arms around him tightly and Dib returned it.

  


***

  


Back underway, Dib had dozed off with his head on Zim’s shoulder. He was awakened by Zim gently shaking his shoulder after a while. He yawned and stretched, blinking, then rubbed the sleep from his eyes to find they’d parked in front of an IHOP.

 

“Man, I can't believe I’m always so tired,” he mumbled apologetically.

 

“You sleep far less than before,” Zim pointed out.

 

“Yeah, but it’s still way more than you.”

 

“Dib, you're a lot younger than me, basically still just a smeet; and it's only been a couple days since I changed your DNA, anyway. Your body is probably still adjusting.”

 

Dib sighed and nodded. “I guess so… - How long are Irkens considered smeets?”

 

“Ten Irken years, so 100 of the Earth’s.”

 

 _“100 Earth years??”_ Dib gasped, raising his head to look at Zim. “You're joking, right?!”

 

Zim shook his head.

 

“Irkens can _live_ that long??”

 

Zim nodded this time. “Much longer, actually.”

 

“Wait, so how old are _you,_ then??”

 

“I’m just over sixteen Irken years, or 163 of your years.”

 

He grabbed Zim’s shoulders unable to believe his ears. “You're _163 years old??”_ Dib gawked at his companion.

 

Zim nodded, then lightly pushed against Dib, indicating he let him up. “Anyway, let’s go have lunch now.”

 

Dib scooted over, shaking his head in astonishment over Zim’s age, then looked at the building fretfully. “Zim, I-I don't know if I can do this…” He reached up and grabbed his antennae, then pulled them down.

 

Zim knitted his brows, scratching his chin in consideration as he assessed Dib. He gave a shrug. “Well, I think you’ll do fine - and stop that before you hurt them!” He suddenly batted Dib’s hands away, then gently took the delicate appendages in his own and began massaging them with his thumbs.

 

“Ziiim,” Dib whined as a chill ran up his spine and his antennae twitched in excitement. “Not out _here;_ pleeeaaase…”

 

Zim gave the tips a couple more gentle strokes with his thumbs, then released them. “Then don't you tug on them anymore!” He poked Dib in the chest.

 

“Ok, ok…” Zim handed him his wig and he pulled it on, then put his contacts in, hoping against all hope that he could manage it. He took a deep breath as Zim popped the top and crawled out after him.

 

They went inside and chose a table well away from the other customers, one that was even partially hidden by a plant, and sat down opposite each other, picking up their menus.

 

A waitress joined them after a short while.

 

“Can I get you two something to drink?”

 

“Hot chocolate, extra whipped cream,” Zim answered, setting his menu down. “And waffles with syrup and whipped cream, but no butter. Please and thank you.”

 

Dib set his menu down too. “Uh, I-I’ll just have the same, please.”

 

“Alright, Dears,” she said and wrote it down, then left.

 

Sighing, Dib self-consciously touched his wig as though afraid it’d jump off his head at any moment. “Butter is bad for us, too?”

 

Zim shook his head. “No, it’s fine. I just don't like it with whipped cream. - If _you_ want some, you can ask still.”

 

Dib shook his head, feeling as though it would be too much trouble to bother anyone else with. “No, I’m fine.” Then he remembered something. “Oh! Uh, and I’m paying this time, ok?”

 

“Sure, but _I’m_ buying dinner tonight.”

 

Dib only nodded in acceptance, then cast his eyes down, his shoulders slumping. He wasn't sure what it was, but he suddenly felt uncomfortable, as though he was in trouble for something he couldn't remember doing, even feeling a distant ache from deep within his abdomen.

 

His companion cocked his head. “Dib? Is something wrong?”

 

Dib rubbed his arms as though he were cold. “It’s nothing.” He wasn't sure how to explain what was bothering him, that just _something_ was nagging at the edges of his consciousness.

 

Their waffles came shortly, the waitress setting them before them and breaking up the moment, to Dib’s relief.

 

He began eating, even feeling somewhat comforted by the sweet food. If only that thing nagging at the back of his mind would let him go.

 

The upside, however, was that his wig _hadn't_ fallen into his plate thus far.

  


***

 

When they finished and Dib had paid, they headed back to the Voot Runner. As soon as both had settled in, Zim turned to Dib.

 

“I should probably take you to a hotel.” He reached out and gently removed Dib’s wig. “We’ll continue our journey tomorrow, if you’re feeling better.”

 

Dib blinked and looked up, startled. “What? _Why?”_

 

“Because you don't look like you're doing very well.”

 

“What? I-I’m fine!” He tried to smile reassuringly.

 

Zim narrowed his eyes. _“You lie!”_ he snapped, then poked his chest. “I have _always_ been able to tell when you’re lying, Dib. - Now, I am taking you to a hotel for the rest of the day and that is FINAL!” With that, he turned back and pulled up the holographic map, checking nearby hotels for one he liked.

 

Dib settled down in his seat, feeling bad for being a burden, but not wanting to argue with Zim.

  


***

  


By the time Zim had pulled up to his selected hotel, Dib was glad for the break after all. He felt physically strange and somewhat unsure on his feet. Zim took it upon himself to help, putting an arm around him to support as he guided him inside.

 

They made it to the counter and Zim ordered and paid for an available room, though Dib didn't bother trying to concentrate on any of it as it took an incredible amount of focus just for him to stay on his feet.

 

As soon as they had entered the room, Zim was supporting most of his weight, as he felt dizzy. Zim quickly removed the PAK, took his coat and hung it up, then replaced it and brought him over to the bed. Zim then removed Dib’s disguise, taking extra care with the contacts. “Dib, I’ll go get the bags now, if you think you’ll be alright for a few minutes on your own.”

 

Grateful to finally be able to lay down, Dib flopped backwards onto the bed and nodded up at Zim.

 

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, by now you may have noticed that I switch back and forth between calling Zim's ship a "Voot Runner" and "Voot Cruiser", this is intentional, and I'm trying to do it randomly. Why? Because the series did! In one episode, Zim will call it the Voot Cruiser, in another it's Voot Runner, and then in yet another it's back to being the Voot Cruiser.
> 
> So, yes, I thought I'd go ahead and do that too as both a nod and sort of a running joke.
> 
> PS: Sorry the chapter's so short. I don't really plan how long they'll be or try to keep to a specific size, I just try to go for when it 'feels' like a good ending point. I figure since I tend to update pretty frequently, you all probably don't mind.
> 
> Lastly: I don't like to alude to anything not posted yet, but I gotta tell you, the next chapters will be interesting and I can hardly wait until they're ready to be put up!
> 
> Anyway, enough rambling from me!


	13. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok, just a head's up that this one is going to get kinda weird. I'm also not going to bother explaining it and just let you all learn as Dib does.

# Chapter 12

  


When he awakened, the room was dark and Zim was asleep on the bed next to him - the _only_ bed in the room, he now noticed, and shot his sleeping companion a glare. He stopped that as he realised that he didn’t feel well at all, feeling both cold and hot at the same time and he was drenched in sweat. His antennae laid limply against his head, seeming not to have the energy to stand erect as they normally would have.

 

Shivering, he wiped the cold sweat from his fevered brow with his shirt sleeve, then slipped from the bed and started, shakily, for the bathroom, trying not to fall, though unsure of what he’d actually do once he got there since bathing was out of the question.

 

He only made it a few steps anyway, before a rush of warmth suddenly ran down his legs and soaked the back, crotch, and legs of his pants; his antennae now feeling like they had just been lit on fire.

 

“What’s going on?!?” he cried, then fell down on all fours as his legs gave out beneath him, the short carpet scratching harshly at his palms. He shifted his weight to his knees and cradled his hands protectively against his chest, fighting back tears. A ripping pain suddenly surged through his abdomen and he doubled over, clutching it as the tears finally burst from his eyes. “Z-Zim..!” he cried weakly, then laid down and curled up in a ball, the rough carpet irritating his skin on the side of his head, while his clothing felt constrictive as it rubbed painfully against his body. “Z-Zim… p-please… he-elp… m-” He grit his teeth against another terrible surge of pain.

 

Within moments, he felt a warm presence and a hand touched his shoulder. At first he tried to shrug away in fear of it hurting too, but found the touch to be surprisingly comforting instead.

 

“Dib?” A few moments passed as Zim carefully checked him over, running his hands gently over his body, then stopping when one slid over the wet pant legs. Zim then bent down so his face was near Dib’s and inhaled deeply. “Oh…” he murmured and gently brushed Dib’s limp antennae out of his face. “So, it’s _that_ time already.” He gave a sympathetic sigh, then slipped his arms under the boy. “I’m sorry, Dib, I should’ve been expecting this.”

 

“Z-Zim..” Dib whimpered as he was pulled up against his companion's chest and curled into the warmth, overcome by a desire to be as close to Zim as possible.

 

“Shhhh, Dib.” Zim stood up, cradling him carefully against his chest, and returned to the bed. He sat down and scooted until his back rested against the wall and he was sitting on the pillows. He reached up and gently caressed Dib’s cheek, the pale green skin hot to the touch. “It’s ok, Dib. I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but believe me: It’s normal. It happens to all Irkens.”

 

Swallowing hard, Dib curled into a trembling ball in Zim’s lap, pressing his head against his companion’s chest as he tried to keep himself from sobbing. “W-what’s wrong with… m-me..?”

 

Zim tucked Dib’s head under his chin and continued gently stroking his cheek. “You’re in The Sweetening,” he answered enigmatically.

 

This simply made no sense to Dib and he shut his eyes tight, wishing he could curl even tighter to Zim and the comfort he found in the other’s warmth. “It-it hurts… so… _much..!”_

 

“I know,” Zim purred, gently squeezing him. “It takes a while, but it _will_ pass, I promise.”

 

“Z-Zim… don’t you e-ever… ever let m-me go,” he plead in a trembling and desperate whisper. _“P-p-lease!”_

 

“Ok, Dib.” Zim cuddled him tighter to his chest.

 

At a loss to do anything but trust him, Dib just laid there helplessly in his arms and soaking up the comfort as much as he could. His body trembled and his breath came in sudden stops and starts as it carried with it the unique and finely spiced scent that was Zim. And so he remained, letting Zim comfort him as his insides rioted from somewhere deep within his bowels.

 

He sought out Zim’s uniform top and closed a shaking hand over it, gripping the fabric tightly. “Y-you said that all -” His breath caught in his throat and he swallowed, trying to fight the pain. “- a-all Irkens… T-this happens to…” He gave up trying to finish the sentence coherently and settled for a simpler one instead. “W-what is w-wrong with me?”

 

“Shhhh.” Zim touched a finger to his lips. “I’ll explain everything later. For now, you should just focus on getting through it.”

 

Dib whimpered as tears whet his cheeks and Zim’s top. “It-it feels like I… I’m b-being ripped… u-up…”

 

“I know,” Zim replied softly and slid his hand down Dib’s side and in to his abdomen, resting it gently there. “It hurts right in _here.”_ He gently rubbed the spot that seemed to be the main source of the pain.

 

Dib nodded, unable to fight it anymore and gave in to the sobs that had been threatening him the whole time.

 

Zim moved his hand again so he could hold the convulsing ball of Dib and cuddled him tighter. “Go ahead and cry, it’s ok,” he purred, rubbing his cheek against the other Irken’s head. “I’m here and I won't let you go.”

 

After what seemed to him to have been an eternity, finally worn out and exhausted from the pain and his crying, Dib fell asleep.

  


***

  


When he stirred again, coming out of a disturbing set of nightmares that were fading from his memory as he awakened, it was to find that he was still being held securely in Zim’s arms. He inhaled deeply, filling his senses with Zim’s unexpectedly good and slightly spiced scent. He couldn’t remember having ever been aware of it before.

 

“How are you feeling?” his companion asked.

 

Dib yawned. “T-terrible…” Aware of a throbbing ache within his abdomen, still causing him discomfort and reminding him of his earlier ordeal, though it _had_ seemed to have numbed considerably from before. “What… what is wrong with me?” Then a thought hit him and he gave a panicked start, turning so he could look Zim fearfully in the eyes. “M-my DNA is falling apart again, isn't it??!”

 

“No, Dib.” Zim calmly reached up and caressed his forehead. “That’s not what’s happening.”

 

“W-what _IS_ it then, Zim..?!” His voice turning to a small whimper by the last word.

 

“You’re in The Sweetening,” he repeated his words from earlier.

 

“But I don't understand what that means!” He trembled, the distance he’d gained, the loss of bodily contact to his companion, seeming to cause his symptoms to flare up, the ache was stronger and his clothing had started feeling scratchy again.

 

“Alright,” Zim sighed. “Calm down first and I’ll tell you.” He indicated for Dib to lay back against him. “And come back to Zim now.”

 

For lack of seeing any other options and wanting to ease his physical distress, he complied, curling back up with a sniffle, this time resting his head against Zim’s shoulder. He started to feel better immediately.

 

“There, that’s better,” Zim purred and resumed his tender caresses. “Irkens don't go through puberty the same way hyoomans do, Dib,” he began explaining, his tone soft and his touches tender. “We go through it in two stages: The first is similar to what you're familiar with, then some time - a few Earth years, I suppose - later, the second and final stage starts. That is what’s happening to you now.”

 

Dib listened, but had trouble making sense of it. “Why _two_ stages?”

 

Zim shrugged. “I don't know, we just do. - Why do hyoomans only have _one?”_

 

“Oh… I guess I hadn't thought of it like that,” he admitted, feeling his cheeks heat up.

 

“Of course you didn't.”

 

Dib exhaled, almost slightly huffing.

 

“Anyway, this defines your reproductive capacity, and -” He inhaled deeply, taking in Dib’s scent. “- Mmm, you seem to be the most receptive type," he purred, his tone taking on an approving, even pleased, note; then inhaled once again, filling his nostrils with it.

 

When that registered, Dib raised his head again and looked at Zim. “I’m _what?”_

 

“The most receptive type.”

 

“And what does _that_ mean?”

 

“Just that you can… _Ohhh..!”_ Zim caught himself and gave a nervous chuckle. “I keep forgetting that it’s considered kind of _weird_ here,” he added, now sounding apologetic.

 

Now Dib was starting to feel nervous as well. “Zim, _what’s_ weird? What aren't you telling me?” He tried not to sound desperate, but his voice had grown higher as he spoke. _“Zim! What is it??”_

 

“Well…” Zim avoided meeting his eyes.

 

“Ziiiim!” Dib whined, getting frustrated with Zim’s strange behaviour and obvious stalling. “Whatever it is, just _tell me_ already, because you’re starting to scare me!”

 

“Do I _have_ to?”

 

Dib blinked, having really not expected his former rival to say that. “Damnit, Zim! _Yes,_ you do!”

 

“Well, okay… But first you have to promise me you won't freak out.”

 

Dib fixed him with a alarmed glare.

 

“Itmeansyoucangetpregnant,” he blurted all at once in a tiny voice.

 

“What? Say that again?”

 

Zim gave a heavy sigh. _“Pregnant,_ Dib. You can get _pregnant._ \- Do not hurt Zim!” He raised his hands as though to shield himself.

 

Dib fainted.

 

Zim took him into his arms and patted his cheek. “Dib?”

 

He stirred, groaning. “Oh, good… -” He looked up. “- I almost thought I heard you say I can get… _p-pregnant.”_ It better have just been a dream.

 

Zim blinked and narrowed his eyes. “I _did.”_

 

Dib looked at him in horror. “But that doesn't make any sense! - I’m _MALE,_ Zim! - I mean, I-I even still have a-a… oh, _you KNOW what!”_

 

Zim waved his hand dismissively. “Yes, yes, and now you have Irken physiology. - How is this actually a _surprise_ to you??”

 

Dib closed his mouth and looked away, embarrassed and dejected because he had a point, then his abdomen cramped up painfully again and he doubled over against Zim. The other Irken cuddled him close as he sobbed in pain.

 

When it eased up and he could raise his head again, Dib’s cheeks were soaked and Zim gently wiped them dry.

 

“It’s ok, Dib,” he purred soothingly and hugged him.

 

“When will it stop?” he whimpered miserably and sniffled, more tears trickling down his cheeks and undoing Zim’s work.

 

Zim sighed, then scratched his chin as he considered it. “...I think it took me about a day or two before the pain was gone.” Then he looked to Dib. “But you are in The Sweetening and I wasn’t, so it’s probably not going to be the same for you.”

 

Dib blinked, there was that word again. “Ok, what do you mean by ‘The Sweetening’ and why should it have been different for _you?”_

 

“We call it that because of your scent, Dib.” Zim emphasised by taking an exaggerated whiff. “It’s turned very sweet.” He closed his eyes as he inhaled again, clearly savouring it, which brought a blush to Dib’s cheeks. _“So_ sweet! - Yes... you smell _very_ good to Zim.”

 

Dib lowered his eyes, now feeling embarrassed. “T-thanks…” He pulled away slightly to gain some personal space back while he tried to swallow down his embarrassment. “S-so… and you’re different somehow?”

 

Zim opened his eyes again. “Well, you tell me, Dib. How _do_ I smell?”

 

“Seriously?”

 

“Mmm-hmm,” he affirmed softly.

 

Dib leaned forward, feeling more than a little self-conscious as he inhaled. “Well… I don’t know… I think you smell a little like... cinnamon.”

 

“Cinnamon?”

 

“Uh-huh,” Dib replied and sniffled again. “And mint, I think.” He took yet another whiff to be sure. ”Yeah, you’re definitely minty, Zim, and cinnamony.”

 

“You think Zim smells like...  _mint and cinnamon??”_ he asked incredulously.

 

Dib nodded. “Well, yeah. At least, that’s what _I_ smell.”

 

Zim shook his head and chuckled. “Well, you _are_ an Earthling, so I guess I’ll go ahead and forgive you for _that._ \- Mint and cinnamon! Have you the brainworms!?”

 

Any protests Dib would have made to his defense were cut off as his pain surged again and he doubled over against his companion.

 

Zim cuddled him, rubbing his shoulders and arms in an attempt to help him. “Poor Dib,” he murmured sympathetically. “Just try to grit through it.”

 

As Dib curled back against him, his bottom settled into Zim’s lap and caused the other Irken to gulp audibly. Dib, however, was not in the position to either care or be able to do anything about it if he had, and thus just snuggled tighter to him, gritting his teeth as his companion had told him to.

 

When it passed, he was panting and his brow sweaty. “Z-Zim, I… I don’t think I can take much more of this…” he whined into Zim’s chest, voice slightly muffled. He raised his head a little. “Was it this bad for you?”

 

“Mm, well…” Zim shifted a bit. “I had pain and… _other_ problems…”

 

Dib looked at him questioningly.

 

Zim thought for a moment, then his antennae stood up as he made a decision. “We call it The Tartening. - It’s kinda hard to explain, but… just think of it like the opposite of you. - I mean, theoretically I could get pregnant too, but… it’s a very low chance.”

 

Antennae laying against his head, Dib huffed. “Lucky,” he grumbled, folding his arms.

 

Zim shrugged. “Well… like I said, I had all the pain too, but also _mighty urges_ of... another nature…” He looked helplessly at Dib. “And they were _very_ mighty, those urges!”

 

Dib found this hard to follow and cocked his head. “Zim, what are you _talking_ about?” he asked suspiciously. “What do you _mean_ by you had ‘mighty urges’? What kind of urges?”

 

“Um… well… - ” Zim gulped and shifted under him again. “- ...A lot like the ones you’re sitting on right now, actually; just _much_ worse.” He pointed downwards.

 

Dib blinked, confused. “I’m _sitting_ on your urges? How can I be _sitting_ on your-” It dawned on him as he suddenly realised what part of Zim had been poking him the whole time. _“-OH, ZIM, NO!!!”_ He scrambled madly from Zim’s lap, blushing furiously, and gawked at him. “WHAT IS _WRONG_ WITH YOU?!” It was a bad choice, because his symptoms came back fully, a cold sweat breaking out and chills running up his spine. His antennae started burning again as well and he wrapped his arms around himself, shivering. His clothing scratched and even just the air in the room felt like it was attacking him, the scents they carried were sharp and assailing to his nostrils until he felt like he’d start bleeding from his very pores.

 

Zim rolled his eyes, then glared. “Would you just cut it out and get back here?” He held his arms out.

 

Again, Dib was left with no other options and gave in, knowing he wasn’t going to be able to fight much longer. His head dropped and he returned to his spot in Zim’s lap, cuddling up to him and tried not to think too much about the hard-on he was pretty much literally sitting on. “At least we both have our clothes on.” Again, he started feeling better immediately.

 

Zim shook his head. “What am I going to do with you?”

 

“Why does everything have to hurt?!” he cried out. “Even the _air_ hurts! How can the air actually _hurt??”_

 

“Because of the changes your body’s going through. It makes everything over-sensitive.” He caressed Dib, wiping at his brow.

 

“Then why does it get better when I’m in your lap?”

 

Zim blinked and his mouth fell open. “It does? How much better? A _lot_ better?”

 

Dib blinked too, feeling nervous and embarrassed. Had he said something wrong? “Well, yeah… I mean, it-it almost goes away. I mean, it’s still all there, but… it’s not so intense… just the surges of pain inside me are bad.”

 

“And… do you like Zim’s, er, ‘minty and cinnamony’ scent too?” Zim asked, his tone wary.

 

Dib tilted his head, then inhaled and considered. “Yeah, actually. I-I’ve always liked those kinds of smells.”

 

Zim blinked, then a huge grin broke out on his face and he hugged Dib tightly to him, nearly crushing him. “This makes Zim so happy to hear! - So very happy!”

 

“W-why’s... t-that?” Dib sputtered, his face pressed into Zim’s chest, and pulled himself back so he could look at the other Irken.

 

Zim eased his hold somewhat, allowing Dib to position himself as he wished, still positively beaming. “Actually, you know, I think I’m not going to tell you and just let you wait and see instead.”

 

 _“What?!_ Are you _serious??”_

 

Zim nodded. “Yes, that is exactly what Zim is going to do.”

 

“That’s not fair!”

 

Zim shrugged, but didn’t budge, so Dib decided to let it go for now.

 

“Can you at least tell me more about what’s happening to me?”

 

Zim shrugged. “What do you want to know?”

 

“I don’t know… Well, why do I smell sweet?”

 

“To attract the feracious type.”

 

“‘Feracious’?” Dib repeated, then gave him a questioning look. “You mean _ferocious?”_

 

“No! _Feracious!_ \- It means actively fertile or prolific! - You’re receptive, I’m feracious! - Do you get it?!”

 

“So, does that mean you’re gonna try and get me pregnant?” It wasn’t what he really meant to say, but he was at a lack of words and still trying to wrap his mind around the whole thing.

 

“Do you _want_ me to?”

 

That sounded far too hopeful and Dib’s mouth fell open, his head snapping up. “Wha-NO!”

 

“So… _no_ little smeets from Zim?”

 

“Why would I want _that??!_ I’m _male!_ I’m not supposed to even be able to get _pregnant_ and I definitely don’t want to be either!” he cried, hoping to finally get that into Zim’s head once and for all.

 

“Note to Future ZiM: Use the preservative.”

 

“What is... - _No!”_ Dib quickly shook his head with a groan and buried his face in the crook of Zim’s neck. “I’m not even going to ask. As long as I’m stuck here in your arms, I don’t _want_ to know what’s going through your mind.”

 

Zim rubbed his back. “You worry too much.”

 

“What _do_ I smell like now?” he asked, deciding to change the subject.

 

Zim lowered his head and sniffled Dib deeply. “Mmm, like vanilla cream… Licky-Sticks…. and waffles with lots of syrup,” he concluded before inhaling once again. “All things Zim is  _very_ fond of.”

 

“Oh. - And do you really _have_ to keep hitting on me?”

 

“But I haven’t hit you even once.”

 

“Hitting ON,” Dib snapped irritably. “You’re _flirting_ with me, Zim! But I’m telling you that it’s not gonna happen, so just quit it already!”

 

 _“LIES!_ How dare you lie to _ZIM?!”_

 

“Shut up.”

  
  


***

  
  


Hours later and with Zim’s help, he stumbled to the bathroom, finally deciding he needed clean pants. Zim reluctantly waited outside the door to give him privacy while he checked himself out, his symptoms coming back in full the moment he’d parted from the other Irken.

 

He’d just managed to peel his pants and underwear off and inspected them. “Is this blood? Why is it clear?” he called out.

 

“It isn’t blood, Dib. It’s just fluid. - Well, actually, there could be some blood in it, all things considered...” Zim replied from the other side of the door. “Is it pink?”

 

“A little, I guess…” He wiped at a damp spot with his fingertip as it was hard to tell with the black fabric of his pants it was covering. “Where’s it from? I mean, it felt like I had… you know... _diarrhea_ or something…”

 

“It’s from your... uterus thing.”

 

“Of _course_ it is,” he groaned. Feeling too weak to stand, Dib sat down on the side of the tub. “Why did I even have to ask.” He looked down at himself. He didn’t look any different, so he reached between his legs and slid his hand back, half expecting he’d suddenly grown a vagina. “Zim, how am I supposed to get pregnant? I mean, I don’t seem to be able to find… you know, a place you could even cum inside of me let alone for a baby, er, I mean a smeet to come _out_ of.”

 

“Uh… that’s because smeets would have be born surgically…” Zim called back to him. “Dib, are you done yet? Or can I come in?”

 

“No! I’m still half naked!” What’s worse is he wasn’t sure he had any more clean pyjamas. “Can you look in my bag and see if I have any underwear left?”

 

“Of course.”

 

He rubbed his head, wiping away the beads of sweat that were threatening to run into his eyes as he waited.

 

“I found a pair, Dib. - It has rockets and weird little spaceships on it... Why would you even _have_ something like this?”

 

Dib blushed, groaning. “Would you just bring them in to me?” He quickly grabbed a towel and pulled it over his lap.

 

Zim had not needed to be told twice and opened the door. Carrying them, he went straight over to Dib and brushed his forehead. “You really shouldn’t do this to yourself, you know. I should be with you.” He slipped his arm around Dib.

 

Symptoms easing instantly, Dib exhaled in relief. “But I’m _naked_ under here.”

 

“I’ve seen it before, when I changed your DNA,” he said dismissively. “Dib, I won’t do anything to you, I promise. - Look, if you want, I’ll even close my eyes. Just don't ask me to leave you alone in here again.”

 

“I guess…” Dib replied reluctantly. “Then do that already, so I can finally get my boxers on!”

 

Zim complied, closing his eyes respectfully, and Dib hastily pulled the boxers with spaceships on.

 

“Ok…”

 

Zim opened his eyes again. “Shall I bring you back to the bed?”

 

Dib nodded. “Y-yeah…. I don’t think I can make it that far on my own legs…”

 

Zim stood up, then bent down and scooped him up with surprising ease and Dib gratefully rested his head on his shoulder. He brought him back to the bed, drew the covers back and settled in, placing Dib securely in his lap as he had before, then pulled the blankets up over them.

 

“I’m hungry…” Dib murmured as he curled up against Zim.

 

“I could call room service.”

 

“Later.” He closed his eyes and pulled his head under the covers. “How DO Irkens get pregnant anyway? Because I don't have _anything_ like a vagina, I checked.”

 

“Well, usually not at all. Most Irkens are actually sterile nowadays,” he explained softly as he caressed Dib’s arm. “So I probably couldn't give you any smeets even if you wanted me to. - I can't remember the last time someone made a smeet naturally, even between a male and female.”

 

Dib raised his head. “You're all _sterile?_ Why??”

 

Zim shrugged. “As said, we’re mostly all just grown in a lab.”

 

“But, _why?”_

 

“It’s more efficient. I mean, if you got pregnant and then had a smeet to look after, you won't get much conquering, or whatever your job is, done as you would otherwise”

 

“So, what about sex, then?”

 

“It’s just for fun.”

 

“Wow, I didn't think Irkens even knew what fun is,” he muttered sarcastically. “So, I guess that means you've had a lot of sex in your 163 years?”

 

“No, Dib, I haven't.”

 

Dib gaped. “You mean you're _a virgin??”_

 

Zim stared at him for a few long moments, his antennae lowering halfway and then shook his head. “No…”

 

“Oh… D-do you have like a wife or girlfriend on Irk, then? Or boyfriend or whatever?”

 

“No, Dib, I don't… but I'm still not a virgin...”

 

Something in Zim’s tone caught his attention and he raised his head to look at Zim, the other’s antennae now laying flat against his head. “What’s wrong? I mean, do you think it’s bad that you're not a virgin or something?”

 

Zim shrugged. “You should try and rest.”

 

As his companion clearly wasn't up for talking about it further, Dib decided to politely let it go. “Ok. I’m sorry.”

 

“Just be quiet now and relax or I’ll start massaging your antennae until you scream my name and mess up your stupid underpants.”

 

Dib gulped, more than just a little impressed by Zim’s threat and he tried to relax as told. As good as it had felt the first time, he really didn't want another session of antennae-handjobs if he could help it, especially not in his current miserable physical state.

  
  
  
  


***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said it was weird, didn't I?
> 
> And for those not so familiar with the show (in case I do actually get readers who aren't), this whole 2nd stage of puberty thing isn't canon, but I thought it'd be fun.


	14. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok, first, sorry for the wait. I just had no way of posting a chapter until now.
> 
> Second, TRIGGER WARNING!!!
> 
> This chapter is heavy and may be upsetting or even triggering to people, so please be careful. If topics like rape and PTSD bother you, then please take care.  
> I don't want to spoil it, but I have to let you know what to expect so that you can make the best decision regarding your mental health.
> 
> There is MENTION of rape, but not an actual rape scene. It primarily shows PTSD due to the past.

# Chapter 13

######  _(I’m just going to drop a Trigger Warning here for PTSD and mention of rape.)_

  


When the night fell, the air in the room seemed to turn to ice for the puberty-ailing Irken and he wiped the sleep from his eyes to discover that Zim was no longer in bed holding him. He cried out in protest and misery, his teeth chattering as he struggled to warm back up, rubbing his arms briskly. It didn't seem to help and he was sure he felt _even colder_ for all his efforts.

 

After a few agonizingly long moments of the cold assault, Zim’s wonderful warmth returned and Dib felt the ruby-eyed Irken begin sliding his arms around him. Trembling hard to the point where it felt more like convulsions, Dib unwittingly jerked his head when he tried to cuddle up to him and succeeded in bonking heads with the other Irken instead.

 

“Owww..!” he moaned in pain.

 

“Oh, Dib!” Zim snapped in a tone that was a mixture of pain and annoyance. “You just be still!”

 

Dib couldn't say or do anything for freezing, but after Zim finished rubbing his own head better, he shortly renewed his efforts to scoop him into his lap; wrapping his arms around Dib in a surprising demonstration of strength that Dib was still surprised the ex-invader possessed and spooned him, fitting Dib tightly to his body as he pulled the covers up over them.

 

“There, Dib,” Zim purred softly near his ear hole. “Sorry I left, I had to go to the bathroom. I didn't think it’d actually wake you up.”

 

“S-so… c-c-c-cold…” Even wrapped up so tightly in Zim’s arms with the other's body warming him like a furnace, Dib just couldn't seem to soak it up fast enough to fight away the chill inside.

 

Zim adjusted, raising up and over Dib so that his upper body partially covered him like a heated blanket. “I know.” he purred then laid his head on Dib’s. “Cold and hot flashes are normal.”

 

“B-but it’s… s-s-so s-s-s-strong…”

 

“You're my little Irken-in-Sweetening, Dib, _everything’s_ more intense.”

 

Dib's antennae began twitching and he was almost positive they were trying to gravitate towards Zim’s, but they were simply too cold and weak to even raise from the pillow.

 

As Dib’s trembling began to calm down somewhat, Zim slid his hand up and began to trace a finger slowly along his companion’s arm, then to his chin and over his mouth. He lingered on his lips for a moment as a shudder of longing ran through his body. He gulped and swallowed it back down and continued on his path, tracing upwards between Dib’s eyes and along his forehead, then circled around one eye and down over his temple to his cheek where it came to rest momentarily before Zim tenderly stroked his temple.

 

Feeling unexpectedly lulled by Zim’s soothing touches, Dib visibly relaxed beneath Zim, letting out a long, contented sigh.

 

Zim gazed down observing the reaction he was having on his amber-eyed companion when his breath suddenly caught in his throat and he froze, gaping down at Dib in a strange mixture of awestruck consternation. _“You! -_ It’s _you!”_ he gasped incredulously and inhaled Dib’s scent as deeply as he could. His eyes opened wide. “It _is_ you!” He shuddered again and his gaze darted to Dib’s slightly parted lips. “Oh, _Dib,”_ Zim whispered, his breathing now somewhat ragged. “I can't believe it’s been _you_ this whole time…” His gaze flitted to where the corner of Dib’s ridiculous underpants was peaking out of the blankets, a little spaceship catching his eye before he turned back to Dib’s face.

 

Meanwhile, Dib had no idea what his companion was on about now, but doubted his mouth would be able to form the words if he tried, so he remained silent, hoping Zim would elaborate of his own accord.

 

“After _all_ these miserable, _wretched_ years -”

 

His companion obliged his unspoken wish and with the words, Zim’s body seemed to tighten around him so hard that Dib was sure he'd come out of this with bruises. Zim’s voice filled with bitterness as he spoke.

 

“- I find you _here_ on this smelly, germ-infested, torturous ball of _dirt!??_ \- Oh, I could just _destroy_ this miserable WASTE of a planet for that right this instant!”

 

“Z-Zim?” an alarmed Dib barely managed to force out in a hoarse whisper.

 

Zim touched a finger pointedly to his lips. “Oh, you just be quiet, you Dib!” he hissed, then removed his hand and balled it into a fist as he continued his seething lament. “I could just enslave _every last single specimen_ inhabiting this _disgusting_ filthball and turn it into a… a...” He paused in his rant as he considered his options, then gave Dib an inquiring look. “Dib, what do you think about a prison planet specifically designed to torture those unlucky and miserable criminals who are… uh, miserably unlucky enough to be sent here?”

 

“I think you’re fucking _terrifying me,_ Zim!” Dib cried, shivering, and shut his eyes against the mental images. “You want to enslave the human race and put us all in a...a… -  I don't know! - Some kind of terrible Irken _concentration camp??_ That’s just fucking _terrifying,_ Zim!”

 

“Oh, not _you,_ Dib, don't be silly! And not _just_ the hyoomans, but _EVERY_ miserable and pathetic species on this and ALL the horrible planets that has ever caused me to suffer or otherwise interfered with the progress of my evil mission of DOOM!” he finished, then the tensity and rage in his voice lessened slightly as he turned an expectant gaze to Dib. “Anyway, do you really _still care_ about this planet and its stinky meatsacks after everything you’ve _suffered?_ After they _laughed_ at you and _ridiculed_ you and made _FUN of you?_ After they even called your giant head _LARGE?!”_

 

 _“YOU_ called it that _too,_ Zim...” an offended and hurt Dib reminded him.

 

Zim gave a small start. “Oh? Oh, yes… Yes, I guess I did, didn't I?” the ruby-eyed ex-invader chuckled sheepishly.

 

Dib said nothing and turned into the pillow, trying to give Zim the cold shoulder as best he could in his current predicament with Zim’s weight still on top of him.

 

“Oh, come on! Don’t be like _thaaat,”_ Zim admonished, caressing his cheek again. “Besides, I _like_ your big head.” Then he tenderly kissed Dib’s temple.

 

Dib blinked. “Y-you do?” He was having trouble keeping up with Zim’s sharp mood swings and felt rather dazed.

 

“Yes,” Zim purred, his lips brushing against Dib’s skin with each syllable. “It is the…eh... most HEADY head that Zim has ever laid his ocular implants upon!”

 

Dib blinked a few times as his mind tried to register the other’s words. “Wait, _what?_ \- Was that supposed to be some kind of weird _pick-up line?!”_

 

Zim chuckled warmly and kissed Dib’s temple again. “You’ll figure it out sooner or later, I’m sure. - So, can we just get back to why you don't want me to conquer the planet anymore already?”

 

Dib groaned in frustration. “Because I was _born_ here, human-turned-Irken DNA or not! It’s my _home!_ I have a duty to it! And that duty is not to just wrap it up in a pretty pink bow with a card signed, ‘Here you go - love Dib XOXOXO’ and hand it over to you and the Irken Empire to do all sorts of horrible things with!”

 

 _“Ooooooo, I want that card! -”_ Zim grinned, rubbing his hands together in delight at the prospect. “- Note to ZiM: That will be the first order I make as the Earth’s Mighty Ruler and Master of Slaves after I’ve taken over and conquered it! - I will have Dib _write_ me that card, uh… all-all _tied up_ in the bows, too - YES!” Zim smirked as he plotted. “Ooh, I am SO good!”

 

“What the..?” Dib gawked at him. “Are you actually having a _naughty little fantasy_ _about me_ right now, Zim?!? Seriously???”

 

Zim ignored him and his expression hardened again, turning back on Dib with expectant demand. “But, you _actually STILL_ want to protect this planet and its beasts and monsters after ALL the times they said you were _crazy_ and _insane?_ \- Every time they threw _food_ or blew _spit wads_ at you? - Every time they shoved you in _lockers_ or _toilets_ and gave you the SUPER WEDGIE OF DOOM? - After they _stole_ your Voot Runner AND your Voot Runner Transporter and… and made you bend over in a _tent_ in the _woods_ where they then proceeded to ‘initiate’ you just so you could get close enough to get your stuff back?” He had raised to a partial sitting position above Dib while speaking, but that still didn't free the other up enough to move beyond the nodding of his head he’d been doing. “To retrieve that which rightfully belonged to YOU _in the first place?!”_

 

Meanwhile, Dib had been listening to Zim’s speech and thinking about all those times he'd been bullied, hurt, and teased. “I guess you have a point… - Wait, that’s _never_ happened to me!” His head whipped around so he could look at his companion in horror. “Someone forced _you_ to bend over for them in a tent in the woods, Zim?!” All concerns as to Zim's prior thoughts long forgotten now.

 

Zim blinked, looking startled. “What?! Of course not! - You think _anyone_ would _dare_ to assault the almighty Zim! I have mighty fists of doom!” He held one up and shook it. “See?”

 

Dib placed his free hand over it. “Zim, I’m so sorry! When did it happen?? Were you ok afterwards?? A-are you damaged-”

 

Zim’s antennae quickly folded down flat against his head and he glared. “Shut up!” he snapped, then softened his tone to a grumble. “It _didn't_ happen.”

 

“Zim-”

 

“I said _shut up, Dib!”_ He had both fists balled now and his ruby eyes flashed. “It didn't happen and even if it _had,_ I most certainly wouldn't want to talk about it!” His eye twitched, then all at once he collapsed on top of Dib, trembling. “I don't want to speak about how their… filthy, horrible, meatnoodle repeatedly… in- _VADED_ my-my-” His voice broke and a sob escaped before he could choke it back down. “Nothing! - It didn't _happen,”_ he whispered, finalizing it as well as the discussion as a whole.

 

“That’s just horrible, Zim!” Dib reached up again with the trembling hand that wasn't pinned between them and touched Zim’s arm, squeezing once, then rubbing it affectionately, wanting to sooth his companion. “I’m so very sorry!”

 

“Just shut up...” Zim sobbed, his entire body taut as he rambled on, unable to stop now that the dam of denial that had been his safety-wall had started to crack. “I-I’m filled with this… _raging fury_ over the… EVIL ASSAULT which… was a… a most blatant and UNFORGIVABLE act of the highest _treason_ upon Zim’s… so _very_ SUPERIOR Irken... being!”

 

Dib closed his mouth and wrapped his arm around his trembling companion as best he could, caressing Zim’s back, his heart breaking at the revelation. Then, realising his cheek was getting wet, Dib gave a small start, then sighed sadly as he realized where it was coming from.

 

“It’s ok to cry, Zim.” He rubbed his back, sliding his hand up to Zim’s head until he found the Irken’s wet cheek.

 

“I’m not _crying,_ Dib. I’m just...” Zim’s voice was broken and weak now, his speech interrupted by his battle against sobs. “...Profusely leaking from my eye sockets because… because it just still hurts so very much even after all the... time...”

 

“Well… it’s ok to do that too, Zim,” Dib replied, deciding he didn't feel like arguing with the ruby-eyed ex-invader over how what he’d just described was literally the act of crying.

 

“Why did you have to make me talk about it?? Why did you have to make me _remember_ _again!”_ Zim whispered painfully through tightly grit teeth and wrapped his arms, fists still balled, around Dib, clinging to him. “I hate you.”

 

“You _hate_ me?? But that’s not fair!” Dib cried in horror.

 

“Isn’t it, Dib? I was _just fine_ forgetting all about it until _you_ had to bring it up!”

 

“But I DIDN'T bring it up, _YOU_ did!”

 

“YOU LIE!” Then Zim seemed to lose the little control he'd still had left and turned his head to bury his face as he began sobbing loudly into Dib’s head. “I don't want to _remember!”_

 

Dib wished above all else that he could have held his companion right now, but knew he was feeling too weak still to even free his right hand or turn onto his back under Zim at all. So he did his best to cup the back of his head with his left hand as the only form of active comfort he was able to offer.

 

“Why…. why do hyoomans have to do things like that to others?... Or to… to… to _me?”_ Zim asked in a brokenhearted sob.

 

“Some people are just sick creeps, I guess,” Dib replied quietly, not sure how to give a better answer.

 

Again Zim buried his face against Dib’s head. “Yet you _still_ want to _save_ them?” Zim hissed, though it was somewhat muffled. “Even _now,_ even _after_ you know about what they _did_ to me?”

 

Dib sighed, now at a loss as anything he could think of to say seemed wrong. He couldn't just hand his planet over to Zim, but if he defended his people now he was betraying Zim and the very terrible and shattering experience he'd had.

 

“How, Dib? Can't you _understand_ why _I_ would still want to?”

 

“I… can understand why you’d feel that way after… what happened, yes… but…” He desperately hoped he was choosing his words carefully enough. “But I don't see why you have to make an _entire planet_ suffer for what one sick creep did.”

 

 _“One?!”_ Zim raised his head suddenly and looked down in furious disbelief. “You think it was _ONE,_ Dib?? Is _that_ what you think?! - TELL ME NOW!”

 

Dib gulped, looking up at him. “Well, I kinda assumed…”

 

“TELL ME!”

 

“Well, I kinda-”

 

“TELL ME!”

 

Dib glared and thwapped his companion’s arm. “I would if you'd shut up!” He huffed. “Why do you DO that!?” He took a deep breath, forcing himself to calm back down. “As I was about to say, I assumed it was only one person, because… well… I mean, you only mentioned a _singular,_ er, 'meatnoodle'… - Can't believe I actually said that word...”

 

“I was referring to the _collective_ meatnoodle!” Zim glared at him, tears still running down his cheeks.

 

“Ok, ok, so it was more than one person!” Dib cried back, his heart throbbing in his chest. “But it probably wasn't the _entire planet,_ was it?”

 

Zim glared down at him and bared his teeth angrily. “Are you making fun of me?”

 

Dib blinked once, then lost it. “NO, OF COURSE NOT! I don't think this is funny at all! I think it’s absolutely fucking _horrible_ what you went through, Zim, and if I could, I’d beat the crap out of each and every last one of those creeps who raped you for it! WITH MY OWN BARE HANDS!”

 

Zim’s glare fell and he gaped down at Dib, stunned. “Y-you _would?_ You would do that _for me?”_ he asked in a small voice.

 

“Yes!” Dib reached up with his free hand and took Zim’s. “Of _course_ I would, Zim.”

 

“Why?!” His brow persed and his wet, ruby eyes pleaded desperately with Dib for the answer.

 

“Because it was just terrible and wrong and you… _you matter to me!”_

 

“I-I matter to you? Why? - Because only _I_ can help you learn how to be an Irken now?”

 

“Because you're my best friend, Zim! A-and that’s why I… I _need_ you.”

 

Zim gaped at him as though he couldn't believe his ears.

 

“Zim, you're _everything_ to me! Why do you think I wanted to go on this trip with _you?_ \- In fact _before_ that, I-I ran straight over to your base to see how you were before I’d even unpacked or said hello to my _dad!_ Is that enough evidence for you of how important you are to me?? - And that was _before_ you ever turned me into an Irken, so don't _even_ give me that crap!”

 

Zim exhaled, his shoulders slumping, then he laid back down on top of Dib again. “Thank you, Dib,” he whispered so softly Dib almost didn't catch it.

 

“I… it’s nothing to _thank me_ for… it’s just how _I feel...”_

  
_“Thank you, Dib,”_ Zim simply repeated.

 

 

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now you will never be able to look at that episode the same way again, I have ruined it for life.
> 
> Seriously, though, you can't tell me that scene in "Saucer Morons" isn't disturbing.
> 
> Sorry the chapter was so short, but this is where it just has to end. Don't worry, more chapters will be coming as I can get around to sharing.


	15. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one also gets a trigger warning for Zim's PTSD.
> 
> Also, bear with me, I've having formatting issues with this one...
> 
> Ok, that should be ok now, I can't get it fixed better anyway.

# Chapter 14

 

  
“Ugh… having a hot flash now, huh?”  
  
Dib and Zim had eventually dozed off, having exhausted themselves with their intense and painful discussion earlier, and now had just awakened again to find Dib sweating profusely and feeling like his entire body had suddenly decided to turn itself into a furnace.

They both kicked away at the damp covers until they were crumpled up in a pile on the floor.  
  
“I feel like I’m going to die,” Dib groaned, ignoring his companion’s question. “First I feel like I’m inside a _deep freezer,_ now I feel like I’m inside an _oven…”_  
  
Meanwhile, Zim had sat up and was staring at Dib’s crotch. Overcome with embarrassment when he noticed, Dib hastily covered it with his hands, afraid something had been peeking out of the hole even though he didn't actually seem to be having a case of morning wood at the moment. “What?? Was it showing or something?!”  
  
Zim fingered the edge of one of the pant legs shamelessly. “I _really_ do hate these stupid underpants, Dib.”  
  
Dib threw his head back against the bed and his arms up in frustration. “Then don't _look_ at them! How hard can _that_ be.”  
  
“It’s enough just to know they're there.”  
  
“Fine! So do you want me to take them _off_ or what?!”  
  
“Yes… but not for the reasons _you're_ thinking.”  
  
“Then _why?”_  
  
“Because those remind me of the strange spaceships the people were wearing when they… -” His voice cracked, catching in his throat and he swallowed hard. "- When they hurt me. - I-I think these underpants are the reason I actually remembered again in the first place..."  
  
“Oh!” Dib’s mouth fell open and he sat up. “R-really?”  
  
Zim just nodded silently and looked away.  
  
“Well, uh… hmm...” Dib looked down at his boxers, noting the stereotypical ‘flying saucer’-shaped spaceships all over them. It was a common pattern for sci-fi stuff, which was why he’d bought them. He sighed. As much as he didn't want to go commando, he also didn't want to continue knowingly tormenting his friend. “Then I… I won't wear them anymore.”  
  
Zim glared angrily at something on the other side of the room. “Cut it out, Dib.”  
  
“No, really! Uh, h-here, just… one second…” He gulped, then quickly shoved them down from his hips, arching his butt off the bed to slip them down farther, then pulled his knees up so he could yank them all the way off, his eyes shut tight the whole time so he didn't have to see if Zim was watching his little strip show or not. Blushing furiously and eyes still closed, he held them up. “H-here… for you, so you can... _burn them_ or something.”

 

He felt Zim take them from him.

 

“Wow, Dib… th-thanks... a lot.”

 

Dib opened one eye finally to glance nervously at Zim. The ruby-eyed Irken was turned away, gawking at the boxers.

 

“Y-you’re welcome,” Dib said, his hands automatically going down to his crotch to afford himself any last tiny bit of modesty he hoped he still had left.

 

Zim raised his hand and snapped his fingers. “Stay right there!” he exclaimed and jumped up from the bed.

 

Opening both eyes, Dib raised his head, curious as to what Zim was up to, and his symptoms exploded leaving him suddenly feeling lonely and miserable, his heart racing as he sweat even more. He also felt very weak and feverish, his breathing ragged and his abdomen ached while his antennae burned and throbbed.

 

The other Irken pulled out his bag and began hastily rummaging through it.

 

Dib forgot his physical complaints for the moment to gasp in sheer horror. “Zim, I swear to God or Irk or whatever your people say, if you pull out _a camera, I'm-”_

 

“SILENCE!” Zim snapped without looking up. “Zim is being _amazing!”_

 

 _“I swear_ I will take this pillow and smack you right _in the middle_ of your ‘amazing’, if you pull out a damn camera!”

 

 _“Trust me._ ” Zim retrieved whatever he’d been hunting for and turned, revealing that his eyes were closed and a pleased smile was spread on his face as he began to approach the bed, his antennae raised and slightly forward as though he was using them to feel his way through the air. Once he’d reached the bed where Dib still lay, he sat down on the edge. “Come here.” He patted the bed next to him.

 

Now very curious as well as eager to be near his companion again since it seemed to help, Dib did as he was told, scooting until he was right next to him. Embarrassing as it was in his half-naked state, he still moved until their thighs and shoulders touched, grateful that at least Zim was clad and that when sitting up, his shirt apparently offered a little bit of modesty.

 

“For you. - And they’re clean, don’t worry.” Zim held up a pair of speedo-styled black underpants with the one-eyed Irken logo in purple on the crotch.

 

Dib took them and gawked. “So... your people _do_ have a sense of humour after all. A very _dirty_ one.”

 

“What do you mean?” Zim asked, turning to Dib, though he kept his eyes shut.

 

“The picture on the front, it looks like it has one eye… you know? The ‘one eyed snake’..?” Now he wasn't sure Zim had heard of the slang term.

 

“Oh, yes, _that!_  - Well...” Zim laughed and shrugged. “Anyway, you can wear them until we can wash your others.”

 

Dib looked at them again and sighed, very unsure he wanted to actually put the rather skimpy looking things on. As his only other option was to prance around bottomless, however, he gave in.

 

“Ok… Yeah… One-one second…” He got up, glancing nervously back at Zim to find that the other still had his eyes closed, then slipped the underwear on, adjusting them into place over his bottom and package. “Ok… you can open your eyes now…” He blushed.

 

Zim complied and gave Dib a good looking over, causing him to blush brighter. “You know, they actually look quite nice on you,” he observed, smiling in approval.

 

“They do? T-thanks, I guess…” Dib gulped and fidgeted with his hands, unable to look his companion in the eyes.

 

Zim scratched his chin thoughtfully. “We may have to stick you in the _rest_ of the uniform sometime. - Just for fun.”

 

If it was possible, Dib blushed deeper still and he definitely didn't think he wanted to start playing dress-up for his companion on top of everything now too. “So, then… well… I-I guess you probably really enjoyed seeing me strip earlier, huh?”

 

Zim stood up to stand before Dib. “I didn't look, Dib.”

 

Dib gasped. “You _didn't??_ I-I thought you’d have _jumped_ at the chance since you’ve kinda been flirting with me a lot... - I think, anyway...”

 

 _“Really?_ After _everything_ I told you earlier?” Zim placed both hands on his shoulders and leaned in so their foreheads touched. “I _knew_ you still wouldn't have wanted me to, Dib, and... I’m _not_ a creep.”

 

Dib mouth fell open and he felt deeply touched. “That… that's actually really sweet, Zim.”

 

Zim smiled a little, then slipped his arms around Dib and picked him up bride-style. He carried him back onto the bed and gently laid him down on it, slightly on his side to accommodate the PAK, then followed so he could look him in the eyes. He reached up and wiped the sweat from Dib’s brow with his palm, before cupping his cheek gently. “Besides, someday you may decide you _want_ me to see you, then it will be that much sweeter than you just doing it because you think you have no choice in the matter.” He caressed Dib’s jawbone. “Even though I don't really understand why it bothers you, and even though I already saw everything when I changed your DNA, I won't look until _you_ tell me I _can.”_

 

Dib was so touched he was speechless and stared up at Zim, his eyes wide and his heart pounding against his ribcage.

 

Zim smiled adoringly, then leaned forward and kissed his forehead. “Now, I bet you're pretty hungry, so I’d better call room service and get my little Irken-Sweetling fed.”

 

After a moment, Dib nodded. “I am... _famished, "_ he realised now that Zim had brought it up.

 

The ruby-eyed Irken reached for the phone and, holding the receiver to his head, he dialed. Without asking Dib what he would've liked, he simply ordered a number of basic vegetarian items, then placed the receiver back on the set and turned to Dib. He cupped his cheek in his hand and caressed the corner of Dib’s mouth with his thumb. “Soon you will be fed.” With his other hand, he touched Dib’s tummy for a moment, then slipped it around his waist and hugged him.

 

Dib closed his eyes and sighed. “It is just _too hot_ in here…” Then he sat up suddenly, careful not to bonk heads with Zim again. “Oh! I-I can't let room service see me like this!” He grabbed his antennae and yanked on them in a panic.

 

Without a word, Zim took Dib’s hands and pried his fingers open with ease, freeing the antennae. Once that was done, he got up and went to the dresser where his and Dib’s disguises were, he put his on, then brought Dib’s over, handing him the contacts first.

 

As Dib put them in, Zim raised a hand to Dib’s antennae and caressed one of the stalks between thumb and forefinger, causing Dib to gasp sharply.

 

“AH! - Zzzziiim….”

 

“I _told_ you not to pull on them,” Zim admonished in a silky tone and caressed a few more times before moving to the other to do the same, until he'd brought Dib to lean forward and lay heavily against him, trembling and squirming.

 

“P-please don’t… don’t make me sp-spooge…” he moaned, trying to fight the startlingly intense sensations.

 

Zim slowly released the sensitive appendage and lowered his hand to rub Dib’s back instead. “Ok, Dib.”

 

Dib let out a shuddering breath. “Thank God… or Irk, or… _whatever_ your people say!”

 

Zim chuckled. “Well, _we_ say ‘thank the Tallests’, but _next time,_ I only want to hear you thanking  _Zim.”_ He smoothed Dib’s antennae back and placed the wig on the amber-eyed Irken’s head, pulling it carefully into place. “There, my little Sweetling.”

 

Dib panted, still trying to calm himself down and aware he was seriously pitching a tent thanks to Zim. “That was like 500% more intense than I remembered it! - I mean, you only touched them for like _a minute,_ but I felt like I was about to explode any second!”

 

“I know,” Zim chuckled warmly. “Fun time The Sweetening, isn't it?”

 

Dib sighed heavily. “So this is yet _another_ weird side effect of me going through your second puberty thing?”

 

Zim nodded, slipping his arm around his waist. “Yes, Dib. That’s the _nice_ part in all of this.”

 

Dib leaned towards his companion so he could rest his head against Zim’s shoulder. “What do you mean?”

 

Zim caressed his back tenderly, embracing him. “Well, should you choose to have sex right now, it will be so _VERY amazing!”_

 

Dib groaned and buried his face in Zim’s neck.

 

“Oh, Dib,” Zim purred and squeezed him. “I’m only telling you _facts,_ not what you _have_ to do. - And there will be plenty more times when it's this good again, so don't worry about missing out this time.”

 

“Is it wrong that _if_ I ever do it with someone, Zim, I… I want to be sure I’m actually ready? And not just some kind of second puberty, raging hormone induced one-night-stand... I want it to _mean_ something to everyone involved.”

 

Zim squeezed him. “It will be, I’m certain of it. - And if it’s with _me,_ I will make _sure_  it is everything you want it to be.”

 

Before Dib could say anything, the doorbell rang, startling them. Coming to life all at once, Dib scrambled for something to cover himself with that was more modest than a shirt and the Irken underwear, and ended up in a futile struggle with the impossibly twisted and tangled pile of sheets on the floor.

 

Zim, however, calmly grabbed his trenchcoat and brought it over to him, helped him back to his feet and slipped it over his shoulders and PAK, then pulled it closed around him. “There, my little Irken-Sweetling; all wrapped up and safe.” He straightened Dib’s wig and guided him to sit down on the bed, then turned to answer the door.

 

Holding the jacket tightly closed, Dib bowed his head, blushing as he knew what the very much unmade state of the bed was going to look like to the server. Especially as his skin was glistening with sweat and his breathing was ragged again. It happened literally every time Zim left his side, he was starting to notice.

 

A cart was wheeled in by a young man in a suit who only glanced politely at him, then wished them to enjoy their meal and have a pleasant night before Zim tipped him and he left, all with the utmost of professionality.

 

Dib exhaled in relief. “Man, I was afraid he was going to say something about us… because of the bed and me,” he said as he shrugged out of the trenchcoat, having not liked how it sat over his PAK.

 

Zim smiled as he lifted the cover of a plate and selected something, which he brought over to Dib. “You worry too much. - Besides, I told them when I checked us in that we were twin brothers and you’d fallen quite sick. - Your name is DiB A. LEON, by the way.”

 

When he heard the name, Dib forgot how grateful he was for Zim’s discretion and groaned. _“Why_ would we have the same middle name?”

 

“Because it's _my_ story and _I_ said so.”

 

Dib couldn't exactly argue with that. He also couldn't remember anything about checking in, even though he knew he’d been conscious for it. “Oh… um, and why didn't you get a room with two beds again?” He’d simply felt too strange at the time.

 

If Zim found the question odd, he didn't show it in the least. “This was the only one they had available that was big enough for two.” He then held a chocolate muffin out to Dib and proceeded to remove the amber-eyed Irken's disguise when Dib took it from him, then his own and set them aside. After that, he took Dib’s trenchcoat and hung it up. “Now, my little Sweetling, it’s time I feed you,” he said when he’d returned, then, to Dib’s surprise, he took the muffin back and tore a bite-sized piece of it off, which he held up near Dib’s lips.

 

At first, Dib wanted to protest, but then changed his mind and, in a moment of spontaneous playfulness, opened his mouth and very carefully took it from Zim’s gloved fingers, careful not to touch them with his teeth.

 

 _“Oooooo,”_ Zim exhaled in a shuddering breath, then tore another piece off. “You are _sooo good,_ Dib. - But will you take _another?”_ He held the piece up when Dib finished chewing and had swallowed.

 

Dib’s cheeks grew hot from the compliments, but he opened his mouth and took the next piece too, causing Zim to visibly shudder.

 

“Mmmmm, _yesssss,_ Dib… - And now… what about... _this?”_ Zim sat down on the bed, tore another piece off which he took between his teeth and waited, antennae raised in question.

 

Blushing harder at that suggestion, Dib shook his head, not ready to take the little game he’d started quite _that_ far.

 

Zim ate the piece himself and reached out, taking Dib’s chin and caressing with his thumb. “No? Too much?” he purred and smiled reassuringly. “That’s ok, Dib. - Then we’ll just keep doing it like this.” Then he tore off another piece and fed it to him, then a piece for himself.

 

And in this way, they polished off the muffin together.

 

 

***

 

 

_“...No…N-..!”_

 

This time when Dib awakened, it wasn’t with the remnants of fading nightmares, instead it was because his companion was having a fit next to him.

 

_“...No….n…. no…!”_

 

Groggily, he raised his head to look over.

 

_“N-no… NO!... don-..!”_

 

Zim thrashed about as he tried to fight off his invisible assailant and Dib narrowly avoided getting a flailing fist to the jaw.

 

_“How dare you… NOOOOO-OWWW-NO-NO-NO..! - OH, NOT AGAIN-..!”_

 

And Zim was _losing,_ it sounded like!

 

The ruby-eyed Irken’s spider-legs shot out all at once and, with a yelp, Dib scrambled back across the bed and jumped off in a mad retreat; stopping only when his back slammed against the wall on the other side of the room and brought him to a halt just under the ceiling.

 

_“...N-NOT TO ZIM..! NO! NO!...”_

 

When Dib opened his eyes again, he saw just how close the call was and what had saved him: His own spider-legs had reacted fast, carrying him away and blocking Zim’s attacking leg in one shot.

 

_“N-NO… NOSTOPDON’TNOPLEASE-NOOO…!”_

 

Zim writhed, his spider-legs withdrawing to point defensively at the ceiling above the bed as though anticipating an attack from above.

 

_“...NOOOOO-ENOUGH!”_

 

Zim flailed again and, with a scream, sat bolt upright, eyes wide. He looked frantically about the room, spider-legs pointing in each direction while Dib cringed, not daring to even breath lest he be mistaken as the ex-invader’s next threat.

 

The ruby-eyed Irken sat there alone on the empty bed, panting with his eyes wide. After a few long moments, Zim seemed realise where he was and finally relaxed, his spider-legs slowly retreating into his PAK. He groaned, reaching behind him to tentatively rub his bottom.

 

“A-a dream… j-just a dream… I _hate_ sleeping...” Zim said in relief, then shook his head to clear it. He glanced at the bed beside him. “Dib? - Oh no! - _DIIIIB!”_

 

Dib, meanwhile, was still huddled up against the wall on his spider-legs under the ceiling, one leg still held out before him as a shield. It took him a moment to grasp that the danger was over.

 

Zim turned and saw him, meeting his eyes. “DIB! Are you ok?!”

 

Dib let out the breath he’d been holding, suddenly feeling terribly weak, and his spider-legs slowly retreated, letting him descend to the floor where he dropped down on all fours, shaken and trembling.

 

Zim hopped from the bed, then took a moment, shuddering, before he realized he could actually walk straight, then he didn't waste a moment and was by Dib’s side, checking him over with haste. He pulled the amber-eyed Irken into an embrace when he was satisfied Dib was no worse for the wear. “Dib, it’s ok now… I-I’ve got you.”

 

Dib turned into the embrace, resting his chin on Zim’s shoulder heavily. “Y-you just… don't... ever do anything... _small…_ do you, Zim?” he said between gasps of air.

 

Zim scooped him up and carried him back to the bed, then halted, changing his mind with a shudder when he saw it, and brought him over to the couch instead.  He sat down and cuddled Dib in his lap, brushing his antennae back.

 

“I’m sorry, Dib…” he murmured softly as he cradled him to his chest protectively. “This always happens when I have to remember… _things…_ \- So, I… try to keep them forgotten.”

 

Dib calmed slowly, relaxing as he cuddled against Zim. After a moment, he raised his head so he could look at Zim. “Well, you shouldn't.”

 

“I almost _hurt_ you!”

 

Dib sighed, wanting to protest, but knowing he couldn't. “Well, let's just say it’s a really good thing you gave me this PAK… and legs...” he admitted, casting his gaze down.

 

“See? - I’ll have to delete them again.”

 

Dib blinked and looked up. “Delete what? You mean your memories?”

 

Zim nodded. “Yeah… I-I’ll do that again later…”

 

Dib shook his head in confusion. “I don't get it… If you've _deleted them_ before, how could you have remembered?” He wasn't up to caring about how Zim could even delete memories in the first place and just wrote it off to Zim just being Zim.

 

Zim shrugged. “No matter how much I try, I just can't seem to delete them completely…”

 

Dib rubbed his head as he tried to sort this all out. “Zim… I think you probably shouldn’t try to delete them at all,” he decided, looking up at his companion.

 

“But it’s better if I do, Dib. - You saw what happens, I nearly impaled you! - And if it weren't for your _incredibly proficient_ use of your spider-legs, I _would_ have!”

 

“And that's precisely WHY you shouldn't try and delete them anymore!” He paused as the other’s words fully registered. “Wait, how do you even _know_ about that? You were still asleep at the time! - Weren't you?”

 

“Yes... I... _was…”_ Zim looked as baffled as Dib was about it and sighed sadly after a moment.

 

Dib sighed as well and wrapped his arms around Zim’s neck, hugging him softly. “I still don't think you should delete them… I-I think that’s _why_ this happens…”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Because that’s what they told me at the institution… That repressed memories can come back up if you don't face them.” He hated admitting that and clung a little tighter to Zim. “They think that’s why I see _‘aliens’_ everywhere…- He made quotes in the air with one hand. “- ...That I must be repressing some past trauma or something.”

 

Zim’s eye roll was so loud, he could hear it.

 

“That’s what they _said,”_ Dib stated firmly and buried his face in Zim’s shoulder. “That’s what everyone’s _always_ said.”

 

“I know, Dib… and that’s _my_ fault.” He gently brushed Dib’s antennae back.

 

“Just don't delete your memories again…”

 

“But I don't want to _remember_ anymore, Dib!”

 

“I know you don't, Zim… but… -” Dib cuddled tighter to the other irken. “- But, if you delete _those_ memories, how do I know you won’t ever just decide to delete memories of _me_ too?” That idea hurt far more than he'd expected, surprising him as his heart wrenched painfully once he'd said it aloud.

 

“I… I would _never_ do that, Dib.”

 

Dib grit his teeth, annoyed that the other kept arguing with him. “And how can I be sure? - What, because you're the _only one_ who can help me learn how to be an Irken now?” He mocked the other’s words from earlier.

 

“I-” Zim stiffened, then sighed. “…I guess I deserved that, didn't I?”

 

Dib could hardly believe his ears. Was Zim, his megalomaniacal old rival, _actually_ admitting he had been out of line? Dib hugged him tighter. “Yes, you did,” he whispered. “You can be a real _jerk_ sometimes.” He squeezed Zim again, then raised his head so he could look him in the eyes. “Don't delete the memories this time, ok? ...And I-I’m here whenever you need me.”

 

Zim met his eyes.

 

“...If you need to talk or… cry, or… or scream or _throw_ something… -” He gulped over his next thought. “- ...At-at _me,_ if it helps… Then I.. I’m here for you.”

 

Zim narrowed his eyes. “You're just not going to leave it be, are you?”

 

Dib shook his head. “No.”

 

“This is really _that_ important to you that you’d offer yourself up as _a sacrifice_ for it?”

 

At those words, doubts as to how bright his idea truly was were beginning to creep into his mind, given his past experiences with the ruby-eyed ex-invader. Still, he took a breath and nodded. “Y-yes?” If any of this was ever going to work, they would have to take risks and trust each other. Dib knew this. So this was his move towards that goal, dangerous though it may be.

 

Zim blew out a long sigh. “I sure hope you don't regret this.” They both looked at each other in silence, then Zim narrowed his eyes. _“Fine._ \- And now, my little _slave-baby!_ Go forth and fetch a muffin for your almighty Master, ZIM!!”

 

Dib choked. “Wha-really!? Your little _slave-baby??”_

 

Zim laughed, then smiled cutely. “No, not really. - But would you _pretty please_ get me another muffin anyway? I mean… you _are_ kind of sitting on me, you know.”

 

Dib wasn't sure whether he should refuse him in order to enforce the idea that he wasn't going to be bossed about, or just get his friend a damn muffin because he _was_ kind of sitting on him, after all.

 

He lowered his head, then raised it again and fixed Zim with a hard glare. “Ok, just this _once,_ Zim, but don't think you can start getting used to this!” He slipped from Zim’s lap and started for the food cart. “I am NOT gonna be your little _slave-baby!”_

 

“Ohhh, I could just..!” Zim jumped up behind him, spun him around and, dipping him like a bride, firmly pressed their lips together, one hand on the back of Dib’s head, the other about his waist, supporting him. “Mmm!” Zim moaned as he parted his lips slightly and took Dib’s bottom lip between them, running the tip of his tongue lightly along it.

 

Too startled to react at first, Dib finally came to life with a gasp and began struggling until Zim drew his head back, ending the kiss and leaving Dib sputtering.

 

Zim stepped back to admire his work, licking his lips.

 

Once Dib was steady on his feet, he shot his ruby-eyed ex-rival a withering glare. “You can just get your damn muffin yourself!” His voice more ragged than he’d have liked and his cheeks were burning with embarrassment. He dashed at his mouth exaggeratedly with his sleeve as though to wipe any traces of Zim away; then turned on his heel and stomped over to the bed, throwing himself down on the tattered sheets and burying his face in the pillows in the hopes the whole display had concealed the erection Zim’s unexpectedly sexy kiss had caused.

 

Still in the middle of alien puberty, he began to tremble and sweat, his entire body aching from the mere touch of the air upon his skin, now that Zim wasn't practically glued to him.

 

Shortly, Zim joined him on the bed, sitting down on the pillow beside him, munching on a muffin, and gently rubbed his back, bringing Dib immediate relief.

 

“Don't you even THINK about touching my _antennae,”_ he grumbled, voice muffled by the pillow and wishing Zim didn't have such a strong effect on him.

 

Zim giggled. “Yes, yes, Zim’s kisses _are_ AMAZING, aren't they?”

 

“I’m not going to validate that question with a comment.” And he _really_ didn't understand why his symptoms always flared up the moment he and Zim weren't all up inside of each other’s personal spaces.

 

“No comment IS a comment,” Zim teased and giggled, then traced a line to Dib's cheek, brushing it affectionately. “Oh, come on, my kiss couldn't have been _that_ terrible, could it?” His fingertip lingered near the corner of Dib’s mouth.

 

Dib just shrugged at first, not wanting to answer and feeling so angry at himself for the whole thing that he could cry. “I've never been kissed like that before,” he finally admitted into the pillow.

 

“I know.”

 

Dib blinked, then raised his head and fixed him with a fearful look. “You mean I was _that bad?!”_

 

Zim laughed. “Oh, Dib, you weren't even _trying_ to kiss me back, remember?”

 

Dib’s antennae fell and he blushed, then sniffled and dashed at his eyes. Biting his lip and looking at Zim, he threw himself on him, cuddling up and burying his face against the uniformed shoulder. “You probably think I’m _so_ _stupid…_  but, I just don't know _anything_ about all this! I don't know how to kiss or… or anything else..!”

 

Zim held him, stroking his back with his free hand, still holding the muffin he was eating in the other. “I could teach you.”

 

“I _bet_ you could,” he muttered against Zim’s shoulder.

 

“And you would have THE VERY BEST teacher in _all the galaxy!”_

 

Dib groaned, feeling tired of Zim’s over-inflated ego. “I’m _sure_ I would.”

 

“If you don't believe me, then take me for a test drive and decide for yourself.”

 

Dib blinked, the groan he wanted to give unexpectedly caught in his throat at the thought. “You just _really_ want to kiss me again, don't you?” he grumbled again after a moment.

 

“Guilty as charged, Dib.”

 

Dib blinked. He really had not expected such an unashamed and straightforward answer from his companion. He raised his head to look at Zim. “Then why don't you just _do_ it, like before?”

 

“Because I also want _you_ to _WANT_ me to.”

 

“But then what about before?! You didn't _ask me_  if I wanted to be kissed first!”

 

“Oh, that was a free sample, because I am so generous!”

 

“Ohhhh, then... _take this,_ Zim!” He lowered his head and mashed his lips against Zim’s, shutting his eyes tight and began to slip his arms around the other’s shoulders. However, not only was Zim _not_ returning the kiss, but the ruby-eyed Irken was _shaking._

 

Dib broke the kiss and drew back to see what had happened. To his horror, Zim was trembling with barely contained laughter; a battle which he promptly lost with a snort and doubled over.

 

“Hey!” Dib cried, feeling more than a little hurt. “Are you actually _laughing_ at me?!”

 

After a few moments, Zim regained control and looked back at Dib, eyes still glittering with mirth as he wiped his lips to dry them of Dib’s slobber. “Oh, this IS an emergency! _-_ I’m sorry, but that was..!” He giggled again and shook his head. “That was _terrible!”_

 

“What!?” Dib’s mouth fell open and he felt even more hurt and embarrassed. “Well… _fine_ then! _You_ show me how it’s done if you think you're so damn _good_ at it!”

 

“Alright.” He ate the last bit of his muffin, then guided Dib off of him and got to his knees on the bed so he was a little higher than eye level with the amber-eyed Irken. “Now, close your eyes.”

 

Nervous and his heart pounding, Dib did as he was told, hoping he wasn’t going to just regret this in a moment.

 

Zim brushed a thumb over Dib’s lips. “Relax, I’ll be in charge. - And please try not to slobber all over me this time.”

 

Barely holding back a glare, Dib exhaled the breath he'd been holding and waited.

 

Zim gently cupped his face and placed the other hand behind his head, supporting the back of his neck. He tilted Dib’s head as he bent down and brushed his lips lightly against Dib’s, first kissing the corner of his mouth softly. Then moved, brushing against them whilst, and kissed the other corner. He inhaled without breaking the kiss and moved back to the middle, tilting his head back more and deepening the kiss. He teased Dib’s lips between his own, lightly tracing along Dib’s jawbone with his fingertips whilst.

 

As Zim continued the tender kiss, Dib’s body relaxed and he surrendered to it, tilting his head back more to give his ruby-eyed companion better access and trying not to mess it up. Or slobber all over him.

 

Zim gave a last kiss, lingering against Dib’s lips, then slowly withdrew from him.

 

Dib opened his eyes, out of breath with his heart pounding in his ears.

 

“And _that,_ my little Sweetling, is how you kiss,” Zim purred, smiling at him and clearly pleased with the result.

 

 

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was time for some positivity after all the pain.


	16. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucky you, here's yet another chapter today! :-D

# Chapter 15

 

The sun was shining through the cracks in the curtains as Dib and Zim were laying on the bed, Zim was sitting up, his tablet in hand; and Dib was on his side, turned away and lost in his thoughts over the kisses they’d had. After just the one kiss where Zim had shown him how it was done, he just hadn't been up for more lessons and needed to think.

 

He’d actually enjoyed the kisses way more than he’d expected and he feared it was his inexperience that was to blame. Or maybe this alien puberty he was struggling with or even some other Irken thing he didn't know about. For all he knew, Zim could've been wearing pheromones.

 

Whatever the reason, it was a lot for him to process and he was grateful Zim hadn't seemed to mind his little emotional retreat.

 

“Dib..?”

 

 _Speak of the devil._ “What?” Dib asked without moving.

 

“Oh, I thought you’d fallen asleep.” Zim laid a hand upon his shoulder and lightly caressed it.

 

Dib just shook his head, then as an afterthought, reached up placed his hand over Zim’s. He wasn't angry with his companion, just confused with himself, and he didn't want Zim to worry.

 

Zim squeezed his shoulder again. “How are you feeling?”

 

Dib shrugged. “I don't know.” He fingered the edge of the pillow next to him, just needing to fidget with something. After a moment, he changed his mind and rolled over to snuggle up to Zim, the ruby-eyed Irken raised his arm and wrapped it around him when he’d settled in. “Sorry I kinda just ignored you… I don't really know _what_ I feel right now, just… I-I keep thinking about earlier....”

 

“Yes, Zim’s kisses are _amazing,_ aren't they? - Do you want more?”

 

“No!” Dib snapped, then shrunk a bit, feeling worse than he already had. “I don't know!” he added, reaching up to rub his head as he tried to sort his emotions out. “I-I’m not sure what I want or if I even want _anything.”_

 

“Oh, Dib.”

 

“I just…  I don't know what I’m doing and this isn't how I expected it to be if I ever did anything with anyone… - I’m just… _afraid.”_

 

“Afraid? Of _Zim?”_

 

“No! - I don't _know!_ I-I...” he paused, thinking, and suddenly felt the need to talk. Perhaps his companion would understand somehow. “I-I’ve never been attracted to _anyone_ or had anyone be attracted to _me_ and… then when I found out I was just a… a broken _clone,_ I began to wonder if that’s why. Like maybe that just didn't get coded in or something…” He sat up, needing to be able to see Zim. “Do… do you think that could be it? That that’s what’s _wrong_ with me?”

 

“I don't really think there’s _anything_ wrong with you, Dib.” Zim laid his tablet aside. “Of course the cloning used on you was _really_ badly done, but now you're all fixed. There’s no way you can be malfunctioning.”

 

Dib sighed as he considered Zim’s words. “I don't know… - What’s it like when you changed my DNA? How’d you even _do_ that?”

 

Zim shrugged. “I just looked for all the broken parts and replaced them.”

 

“But HOW?”

 

“With my AMAZING brainmeats and _superior_ Irken cloning technology!. - Mostly, I had to rewrite it because human and Irken DNA aren't actually compatible. I was able to download your personality into your PAK before I lost you, then I-”

 

“Wait, you LOST me?? Did I _DIE?”_

 

Zim shook his head. “No, no, it doesn't work that way. - If you really want to know, you’ll have to think ABOVE your primitive Earth… things!” he gestured dismissively.

 

“I’m _trying_ to, but it doesn't make any sense.”

 

“Dib, you didn't die and you are still _you,_ just trust me.” He reached up and affectionately brushed a few beads of sweat from Dib’s forehead.

 

“I guess…” Dib murmured dejectedly, though he appreciated the physical care his ruby-eyed companion was showing him. There didn't seem to be much choice other than to trust Zim at his word anyway.

 

Zim started scratching his chin in thought, then looked to Dib after a few moments. “Think of it like this: I went through every bit of your code and rewrote it with Irken code, then made a backup of your personality in the PAK in case your body shut down during the change and applied the new code to you, monitoring the whole process so that I could recode quickly if one wasn't being accepted at first. In fact, that’s _literally_  what I did. - Make sense now?”

 

“Not in the slightest, Zim.”

 

Zim shrugged. “Well, here we are, so… is it _really_ so important to understand it?”

 

Dib cast his gaze downwards and shook his head. “I guess not… I just want to… know what’s wrong with me.”

 

 _“WHYYYY_ are you so convinced there’s something _wrong_ with you??”

 

“Because I'm not like other guys my age. I _told_ you how I've never wanted anyone.”

 

Zim leaned forward and wrapped his arms around Dib, pulling him against him and sitting back. “You worry too much, my little Sweetling. - So you're _not_ like the other hyoomans! Exactly where is the _downside_ here??”

 

Dib settled against his companion and laid his head against his chest. “I’m just afraid I don't _work_ properly. That I’m still broken. That I'm not even _human.”_

 

“Ah, newsflash: You _aren't.”_ He emphasized this by taking one of Dib’s antennae between thumb and forefinger, giving it a gentle wave. “So I would certainly hope you _don't_ work like a normal hyooman.”

 

Dib shuddered. “Ziiiimmm…” He reached up and batted Zim’s hand away.

 

Zim moved his hand to the other and gave that one a slow caress instead, coaxing yet another shudder from his companion. “And you certainly aren't broken in _this_ regard.”

 

“Ziiiimm… stop that…” Dib moaned as his antennae twitched.

 

Zim did as he was told and stroked Dib’s back instead. “Yes, you work _juuuust_ fine.”

 

Dib exhaled slowly as he tried to calm himself and his antennae back down. “Then... w-why haven't I ever wanted to have sex with anyone?”

 

“We met when you were 12, right?”

 

“Yeah… In 6th grade.”

 

“So, isn't it _obvious?_ Because the attractiveness that is ZIM is _incomparable!”_

 

Dib shook his head. “Zim is _impossible,”_ he countered.

 

“Impossible to match!” He slid his hand under Dib’s chin and tilted his head up so he could look into the amber-coloured eyes. “If you don't agree, then please tell me why I have such a strong effect on you when I’m near you or… when I _touch_ these?” Then he gently smoothed Dib’s antennae against his head.

 

“I don't know, Zim. I don't understand _anything_ I’ve been experiencing!” He closed his eyes and wiped at them with his sleeve mainly because he needed to do _something_ with his hand. “And, no offense, but I don't really think I want to have sex _with you_ either.”

 

“You may change your mind,” Zim dismissed it.

 

“And what if I _don't?”_

 

“Oh, Dib”, Zim murmured and gave him a squeeze, then rolled so they were side-by-side, heads level with each other. He cupped Dib’s cheek. “You worry about this _way_ too much. - Now listen carefully: There's _nothing_ wrong with you, you're _not_ broken, and just because you feel this way _now_ doesn't mean you _never_ will.” He ran his thumb over Dib’s lips once. “If you're not ready, then you're _not ready.”_

 

“How can I not be _ready??_ At _my_ age?! I’m not a little kid anymore!”

 

“Your _age??”_ Zim snapped, incredulous. “You're not even _two!_ \- You most certainly ARE still a _smeet!”_

 

“Not in Earth years, I’m not!”

 

“I don't care!” Zim barked and withdrew his hand to gesture in the air. “WHY are you _defending_ this so much?? - Quit arguing with Zim!”

 

Dib felt as though he'd been slapped, but didn't know why. He shut his stinging eyes and curled in on himself. “Because, I know it's _true!_ Because _everyone else_ says so!” The tears came and he covered his eyes.

 

“Ohhhh, how could anyone _do_ this to you!” Zim cried in frustration. “Dib,” he switched to a softer, yet still firm voice. “They’re wrong. You're perfect. - Well, _almost_ perfect. I do miss your fire.”

 

Needing to to gain a little personal space so he could hopefully feel less vulnerable, Dib uncurled and sat up, looking down at Zim. “Humans _fixate_ on sex! To _not_ want it means I’m broken!” Dib cried, fixing the ruby-eyed Irken with a pleading look, eyes filled with desperate tears. “How could they be wrong if _everyone_ says it?”

 

When Dib had finished, Zim threw his head back and let out a snarl of frustration, yanking on his own antennae. “How can hyoomans be that... that... _insane!?!”_ He released his antennae and sat up to face Dib, first exhaling to release tension, then meeting his eyes. “This planet is just _begging_ to be conquered!” Ignoring the horrified glare Dib shot him, he placed a hand on Dib’s shoulder, then slid it down along his arm to his hand; with the other, he gently poked Dib’s chest. _“You're_ not broken, Dib. Your _society_ is.”

 

Dib shook his head. “I don't know… How can one be right and _everyone else_ be wrong? That just doesn't make sense!”

 

 _“Mine_ isn't like that.”

 

“Oh yeah? And just what IS yours like, Zim?” he asked, aware his tone was more rude than it should've been.

 

Zim apparently thought so too, for he narrowed his eyes. “Aside from being superior to yours in _every_ way, we _also_ don't tell our members there’s something wrong with them just because they’re not ready to have sex with anyone.”

 

“Just when they're _short.”_

 

The words hit their mark and Zim’s expression darkened, his antennae fell flat against his head and a ruby-eye twitched.

 

Dib knew he’d gone too far, but for some reason, he also didn't feel he could take it back. Zim was _wrong._ Now if only the ex-invader would see that _too._

 

When Zim finally spoke, his voice was dangerously even. “At least it’s height that could _change,_ instead of something fundamental that _can't.”_

 

“How can it _not?!_ It’s a _choice_ if I want to have sex or not!”   


“Very well, Dib,” Zim began in an extremely patronizing tone. “Then tell me why you _can't?”_

 

Dib halted. He hadn't expected that. He sharply retreated from the bed and turned away to glare at the floor. “Just forget it!” Moving away from Zim was the wrong choice and his symptoms flared up, angering him more. He tried to ignore the way his legs suddenly felt too weak to hold him for long or the way his heart began to race and the sweat broke out on his brow, and definitely didn't want to think about how his antennae began to burn.

 

“Oh, NO you don't, Dib! Not this time!” Zim jumped from the bed and grabbed his shoulders, turning the afflicted Irken around to face him and placed his hands on Dib’s upper arms. “I want an answer!”

 

Dib couldn't bring himself meet Zim’s eyes, and hated even more how his damn antennae seemed to gravitate towards his infuriating companion. He tried to pull away, but Zim tightened his grip.

 

“I want to know why you don't behave the way you think is _'_ _normal’_ when you just told me it’s your _choice!”_

 

“Why do you always have to _win?”_

 

“Why do you always have to _lose?”_

 

Dib’s earlier resolve shattered and his shoulders slumped even more. Tears rolled down his cheeks, blurring his vision. He wasn't sure what he had been fighting for anymore. It proved he didn't work properly, though.

 

“Because I can't do anything _else…”_ he whispered, knowing his voice wasn't going to work.

 

Zim reached under his chin and tilted his head up. “What am I going to do with you?”

  
  


***

  
  


After their argument, all Dib had wanted to do was lay down, bury himself under the covers, and cry until he passed out. Zim, however, wouldn't hear of it and, thus, he was curled up in Zim’s lap on the bed again; the tattered sheets from before had been replaced. Sleep hadn't happened either, but the tears had finally stopped.

 

“How long do you think it’ll be before we can leave?” he asked in a small, somewhat hoarse voice after what he was sure had been hours.

 

“What? Did you say something, Dib?”

 

Dib raised his head a little. “When -” he coughed and swallowed, his mouth dry and he felt parched. When had he last drank anything? He couldn't remember. “When… can we leave?”

 

“When you're feeling better,” Zim replied.

 

“Need something to drink…”

 

At Zim’s urging, he moved aside, letting his companion get up and Zim crawled from the bed, went over to one of his bags, and retrieved a can, which he brought back over. He opened it and handed it to Dib.

 

It was green and had the Irken logo on it. He wasn't sure, but thirst won out and he began gulping it down so fast he hardly tasted it. He stopped after he’d finished half the can because he had to catch his breath.

 

He wiped his mouth, then took another smaller drink to see how it tasted. It was sweet and exotic, a flavour he didn't recognise nor did he know how to describe, and lightly carbonated.

 

Zim rejoined him, sitting down next to him and slipped an arm around his shoulders.

 

Still thirsty, Dib finished the rest, then set the empty can on the side table.

 

“Liked it, huh?”

 

Dib nodded and cuddled back up to Zim. “What was it?” He’d have liked _anything_ in that moment, so long as it didn't _poison_ him.

 

“Irken soda pop.”

 

Now rehydrated, his voice worked again and Dib looked at Zim. “How much longer is this going to last? I feel like we’ve been here for _weeks.”_

 

Zim chuckled softly and shook his head. “It’s been a little over 24 hours, Dib.”

 

 _“24 hours??”_ Dib groaned miserably. “You've got to be joking!”

 

“Nope. You do realize you’ve only been sleeping about two hours at a time, right?”

 

Dib moaned in frustration, fixing Zim with a look of long-suffering. “And how much longer..? Do I even _want_ to know...”

 

Zim shrugged, idly caressing his shoulder. “Well, I’m definitely not taking you _anywhere_ for a week.”

 

Dib gave a start, raising his head to look at his companion, unable to believe his ears. “A _week!?”_

 

“The main part of The Sweetening lasts around an Earth week,” Zim explained with a nod. “Until then, we’re not leaving this hotel.”

 

“But _why?”_ He did not like the prospect being stuck there for an entire week and was itching to get back to their road trip. “What difference does it make if I’m miserable _here_ or in your _ship?”_

 

“You're too vulnerable right now, Dib. Haven't you noticed how weak you are?” He took Dib’s wrist and waved it, causing his hand to flop limply.

 

Unimpressed, Dib withdrew his hand and placed it on Zim’s chest. He _had_ noticed he didn't seem to be able to physically assert himself against his ruby-eyed companion. “But that doesn't matter if I’m just sitting _in your ship.”_

 

Zim placed his hand over Dib’s, entwining fingers and closing his hand around it. “It _will_ matter when we have to stop to eat.”

 

Dib's blushed at the less than platonic hand holding, but said nothing. He also could see the problem there, given his reactions based on his proximity to Zim, “Well, if we just sit _next_ to each other, instead of across-”

 

“Dib, it _matters_ because I’ll _destroy_ anyone who even looks at you wrong!” Zim snapped, then hissed in the direction of the window as though to preemptively warn the entire planet.

 

It took him a moment, because he couldn't possibly have heard right, then Dib’s mouth fell open and he gasped. “You would _what!?”_

 

“You _heard_ me,” Zim muttered.

 

“Are you _crazy?!”_ Zim thought he could go start getting possessive on Dib now?! He had another think coming, as far as Dib was concerned.

 

“A little,” Zim admitted surprisingly.

 

Dib glared. “Are you _always_ gonna be possessive now? Like you think you _own_ me or something?!”

 

“No, Dib! But, right now, I really don't think I would be able to control myself. - Dib, we’re just staying here the week to be safe, then once you’re not at such a risk, we won't have to worry about it.”

 

Dib sighed, not seeing he had much other choice and not really up to fighting about it at that point. _“Fine…_ \- WHY did this have to happen to me _right now??”_

 

“That’s probably my fault, I’m afraid,” Zim replied apologetically and squeezed Dib’s hand, gently caressing with his thumb.

 

“You didn't think to code it to happen _after_ our trip?” was his only guess.

 

“No, I can’t influence it that way.” He glanced to the ceiling, then back to Dib. “Dib… every so often an Irken experiences a spike in their fertility - _it is mighty!_ \- In… certain cases, the presence of one will set it off in another.”

 

Now Dib was interested and listened intently, saying nothing and waiting expectantly.

 

“Obviously, back when we still reproduced the natural way, it was useful for two of us to actually be fertile at the same time, so we respond when others are.”

 

Dib considered this, trying to make sense of what his companion was telling him. As he thought it over, he decided it sounded familiar. “Oh… You mean like how some animals have mating seasons?”

 

“No!” Zim glared. “We are _superior_ to your earth animals!” After a moment, he relaxed with a huff and a grudging shrug. “But I _suppose_ for the sake of you comprehending any of this _at all,_ we’d… best just GO with that… that _terrible_ analogy.”

 

Dib rolled his eyes, but said nothing.

 

Zim sighed heavily. “So, FINE... _You're_ like a female Earth dog, and _I’m_ -” he shuddered, making a lemon face. “- like a male... Earth moose or something... that ruts...”

 

“...Did you just..?”

 

Zim shuddered again and shook his head a few times, then stuck his tongue out, looking sick. “UGH! I can't _believe_ I just _SAID_ that! - You’d better be grateful, Dib!”

 

 _“Grateful??”_ Dib gasped, then glared at him. “You just called me a _bitch,_ Zim! I’m not grateful for that!”

 

 _“What?!”_ Zim blinked, antennae shooting up. “I did not!”

 

Dib was absolutely NOT letting Zim get away with insulting him and then just playing it off like he used to in the past. “Yes, you did!” To prove just how much he wasn't having it, Dib yanked his hand away from Zim’s.

 

Zim glared, but didn't stop Dib’s action. “When?!”

 

“Just now! Zim, you said I was a female dog!”

 

Zim laid his antennae down. “YES! A _female dog!_ Not a… a... that _other thing!”_

 

“But that’s what a female dog _is!”_

 

And the emotive appendages shot up again. _“Eh?!_ What are you _talking_ about?? - Tell Zim now!”

 

Dib blinked, then fixed Zim with an incredulous look. “You really _don't_ _know?!_ \- What do you actually _DO_ on your tablet all day long??”

 

Zim fixed him with an irritated look. “I _told_ you, I research hyooman things. - Very interesting and useful hyooman things!”

 

“Like _what?!”_ What could _possibly_ be so useful if it didn't prevent him from unwittingly calling Dib nasty names?

 

Zim huffed and sighed. “Well… Like did you know that are over _3,000_ types of _lice_ on this filthy planet!? - That is very useful for Zim to know!”

 

Dib gawked, then sputtered. “Types of LICE, Zim?? Are you serious?!”

 

Zim nodded and continued on. “Or that the volume of the Earth’s moon is the same as that of the Pacific Ocean. - Or that every time you lick a stamp, you’re consuming a tenth of a calorie. - All are VERY IMPORTANT things, wouldn't you agree?”

 

“I can't believe my ear… _holes!”_ Dib cried as he covered his eyes and shook his head. He lowered his hands and looked pitifully at Zim. “I’ve _really_ gotta help you.”

 

Zim was watching him carefully. “So… I take it you _don't_ consider these things important here?”

 

Dib shook his head. “Not unless you're planning to appear in some useless facts quiz show.” He shook his head again, then raised his hand and waved it to dismiss the topic. “Nevermind… Just… let’s go back to what you were telling me about Irkens. That you have mating seasons or whatever...”

 

Zim looked confused for a moment, then his antennae raised. “Oh!” He narrowed his eyes at Dib. “Only if you're not going to get angry at me again.”

 

 _“Yes…_ I’ll just assume you still don't know _anything_ about human society. Happy?”

 

Zim was clearly nonplussed. “Not particularly.” Then he shrugged dismissing it. “As I was saying, Dib, we all have… the mating season - ohhh, that just sounds so _stupid!”_ He lamented, making fists and raising them in frustration. “No, drop that, Dib. - Because it is _WRONG!”_

 

“Ok, ok! We won't call it that!” Dib cried, reaching out and putting his hands over Zim’s fists. “So, _whatever_ it is, you all have it… and..?”

 

Zim blinked and met Dib’s eyes, just looking at him for a moment. In a smooth movement, he opened his fists, entwined his fingers with Dib’s, and closed them again. “I’m having mine right now, Dib, and I… I think that’s why _yours_ started.”

 

Now Dib blinked as the words registered. “Can that happen? I mean, I can see if two people have it together, but for me to just suddenly start the very first one now?”

 

“If you had been a normal not-quite-2-year-old Irken of Irk, you’d still have a long time to wait before this.” Zim squeezed his hands gently. “But I think because your hyooman body was already mature enough, your new Irken DNA was just waiting for a signal.” Zim’s gaze fell to their hands and he caressed Dib’s with his thumbs. “And it came from me. Because I'm in Tarting.”

 

Dib bit his lip and sat back on his heels. So, Zim was in like a sort of rutting or whatever? The thought made him feel awkward and blush. “What… what is it like for you? I mean.. you don't seem to have all the problems I do… _You_ function fine when you’re not _glued_ to me.” He waved their hands once, to refer to their physical contact. “While I feel like everything’s trying to _kill_ me all the time, even the _air!”_

 

Zim held eye contact with him, his expression soft. “I have a lot more experience with it than you do, Dib, and I’m not going through my second puberty, The Tartening,” Zim replied, raising himself so he was at eye level with the amber-eyed Irken. “It’s still not the same, anyway. - _You_ feel weaker and more docile than usual, and needing to be near me when you're sweeting;  I… I feel stronger, more _aggressive,_ and needing to _protect_ you, when I'm tarting.” He paused, giving Dib a moment to process that. “When it’s just the two of us, I’m fine and can, as you said, function fine. But when I think of _someone else_ being around right now, knowing how miserable you are, I...” Zim paused to take a few deep breaths, his breath quickened and his chest heaved as his eyes narrowed and flashed. “It fills me with such EVIL RAGE!” he growled through grit teeth. _“And I just want to -!!!”_

 

“Ow-ow-ow-ow-OW!” Dib cried, doubling over as Zim was digging his claws into his hands, the ex-invader’s gloves doing little to dampen them.

 

Zim relaxed immediately. “Sorry, Dib!” He raised Dib’s hands to his mouth and blew against them, then held them to his chest gently. “This is why we can't leave the hotel.

 

Dib released a shuddering breath to try and calm himself after Zim’s display. “So… I…- W-what about the man from room service?” Was he going to have to worry about the ex-invader eviscerating him?, was the real question he didn't dare ask.

 

 _“One_ person who keeps a _professional_ distance is ok.” Releasing Dib’s hands, he slipped them around his amber-eyed companion, cuddling him close. “But you saw what happened at the bank, and that was before you even started.”

 

Dib let himself be pulled into the embrace and settled down against Zim. He shuddered remembering the blood. So Zim had already been struggling at that point, he noted. He decided he was glad his companion had only bloodied the man’s leg. “S-should we ask for a woman, maybe?”

 

“I don't think it would matter, Dib. - Remember, Irken females are a dangerous force, too..”

 

Dib nodded. He remembered Tak well and how vicious she was in her determination. She had proven to be a bigger threat than Zim.

 

“So, we stay here at least the week, Dib?” the ruby-eyed Irken asked.

 

“Agreed.” Dib shifted against Zim, trying to get more comfortable. “And then I’ll be fine again?” He chose to lay his head against Zim’s shoulder, as he could still look up and see his companion that way. “This’ll all be over?”

 

Zim rubbed his shoulder affectionately. “Well, the _puberty,_ that is The Sweetening, part should be.”

 

At those words, Dib stiffened. “...I don't like how you said that, Zim.”

 

“Your body will be ready to bear smeets by then, so if you have sex after that - and _aren't_ actually sterile - you could... get pregnant.” Zim’s voice seemed to tremble ever-so-slightly on the last two words. "We call this Sweeting."

 

Dib didn't catch it, though, and just groaned over how unfair his life was.

 

“Dib?”

 

“I guess it shouldn't even matter to me, anyway,” he muttered bitterly. “It’s not like it’s ever going to come up.”

 

“Dib…”

 

“So, does this mean I’m going to have periods too?” He imagined himself having to go into the lady’s aisle in a grocery store and asking a clerk to explain what everything was. _He wanted to scream!_

 

“‘Pee-ree-ode-z’?” The ex-invader pronounced each syllable very carefully.

 

Dib sat up so he could look his companion in the eyes. “You don't know that either.” He should've guessed. “Am I going to _bleed_ every month, Zim?”

 

“Bleed?” Zim looked very confused now. “Every month? Why would you _bleed_ every month?”

 

“Right, I’m not! - Because I don't even have _a vagina!”_ Dib snapped, sarcasm dripping from each word.

 

  


***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There we go, a little more world-building for you, regarding Irkens.
> 
> And yes, poor Dib also has his own baggage. Being (possibly) asexual or grey asexual in a sexual word can be pretty tormenting.


	17. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, here's another one, finally!
> 
> It could be a bit before I can get the next chapter up, as I'm still writing it.

#  Chapter 16

  
  


Dib was curled in a ball on the bed, covers pulled tight around him and over his head, trembling in the throes of The Sweetening, as Zim had called it. All alone, for he'd sent, rather _begged,_ his reluctant companion out to fetch him some reading material. If he was going to be stuck in the hotel room for days, he needed something to keep him from going crazy.

 

As he lay there, heart racing, antennae burning, and his whole body aching, he regretted his decision. It was worse than he'd expected. He felt alone, more alone than he could remember having felt before, and lost. He clung tightly to Zim’s pillow, the ruby-eyed Irken’s scent giving him only a small comfort as he cried a steady flow of tears into it. His abdomen hurt too, somewhere deep inside, and he felt sick to his stomach. That it was less than the gut wrenching pain he’d suffered the first day especially, didn't matter to him.

 

Furthermore, his emotions, his intense yearning for Zim, baffled him. The moment his companion had hurried out the door and closed it, it had happened: Dib was overcome with crushing aloneness, as though his last friend in the entire galaxy had just walked out of his life.

 

The fact that it was even half-true made it worse, as Dib was fully aware that Zim was his one, last, and only, friend he’d ever had. Worse than the throbbing and aching of his enraged body was the sting in his heart. He could not survive long, he was positive.

 

By the time he heard the click of the door unlocking, he was worked up beyond consolation.

 

“Dib… I-I’m back, and I-”

 

The sound of the voice brought him to life and all at once he threw the covers aside, rushed from the bed, and, at a full dash, threw himself onto the shorter Irken, wrapping his arms tightly around him. “OHZIMIMISSEDYOUSOMUCH!”

 

A contact fell out of Zim's eye and his wig shifted on his head as the ruby-eyed Irken staggered back a few steps, dropping the bag he was carrying to put his arms around Dib, only just able to keep himself and the amber-eyed Irken upright. “Oh, Dib..!”

 

Dib held tighter, grateful beyond all words to be in close proximity with Zim again. “ITHOUGHTIWOULDDNEVERSEEYOUAGAIN!”

 

“Dib, I-I’m back… It’s ok, now...”

 

“ZIM! _OH, ZIM!”_

 

The door adjacent to their room opened. “Would you two freaks shut up!” a man’s angry voice snapped.

 

Both jumped and Zim turned, a growl escaping him as he rounded on the plump human. “GO BACK IN YOUR...  _ ROOM,  _ YOU INFERIOR MEATBEAST!” Zim snarled, taking a step toward, growling from deep within his chest.

 

Not wanting to be left behind again, Dib hastily followed and ducked behind Zim to hide his alien appearance while clinging to one of Zim's gloved hands, antennae flat against his head. The action seemed to sober the ex-invader.

 

“Mind your own business, you Earth...  _ jerk!” _ Zim snapped, his voice more controlled.

 

“Ew, what’s  _ wrong _ with your eye?!”

 

Zim smiled and seized the opportunity. “IT IS  _ CONTAGIOUS! _ \- Now go back INSIDE before I  _ infect you!” _

 

“Freaks!” the man grumbled and retreated. “Just keep it down!”

 

Zim hissed after him, tongue out in a snake like manner.

 

Satisfied he’d chased away the threat, the ex-invader turned and ushered Dib back into the room, picking up his contact as he did so.  _ “Stay,  _ Dib,” he commanded firmly, then turned and began picking up the items that were scattered all over the floor, putting them carefully back in the bag.

 

Zim picked up the last item and, teeth grit, stomped back into the room, angrily slamming the door behind him. “Oooh, that miserable, insubordinate WORM does not know how LUCKY he is to have faced Zim and LIVED!” He dropped the bag unceremoniously onto the bed and threw his disguise angrily across to the couch.

 

Dib, however, couldn't have cared less about Zim’s raging and jumped over to him, wrapping his arms around him again with a sob of gratitude.

 

Zim blew out an impatient breath. “So… have a pleasant time without me?”

 

“No, Zim,” Dib whimpered against his neck. “It was horrible.”

 

“Didn’t I try and tell you this was a bad idea?”

 

Dib nodded, still holding onto Zim. “Yes, you did…”

 

“Sometimes I really just don't know what I’m going to do with you, Dib.” Zim finally wrapped his arms around Dib, hugging him close. “Anyway, I… got all the things.” He inhaled deeply, savouring the sweet scent that was Dib, then detached himself and guided the amber-eyed Irken to the bed, sat him down on it, and pushed the bag into his hands.

 

Dib didn't move until his companion had sat down beside him. “I missed you, Zim… I felt like… like...”

 

“Like something imminently vital to your survival was torn from you?”

 

“Yeah.” Not caring about the items he'd wanted anymore, Dib set the bag to the side and turned to his companion. “It was as though… I don't know, just...”

 

“No breath of air can keep you from drowning? No painful thump of your heart can drive the blood through your veins? Like you've been sucked into an icy-cold black hole somewhere beyond the farthest reaches of space where no one would ever think to search for you?”

 

“Yeah, actually.” Dib nodded, somber. “It-it was  _ exactly _ like that. Like I was constantly dying without dying.”

 

“I know, Dib.” Zim slipped an arm up to Dib’s head and caressed him lovingly. “I felt that way too.”

 

“Y-you did? But I thought you… you’ve already been through this.”

 

“It’s not just the puberty, Dib. Tarting, basing, sweeting...” he began, resting his head against Dib’s shoulder. “They can all be susceptible… under the right circumstances.”

 

Dib felt bad. “I didn't know… I’m sorry. I wouldn't have made you go if I’d known it would hurt you too.” He really wouldn't have. Causing his ex-rival to suffer was long since abandoned and if Zim had suffered even half as much as he had, then Dib felt like the biggest jerk in the world.

 

“It’s ok, Dib,” the ruby-eyed Irken replied, giving him a squeeze, then he reached for the bag and put it in Dib’s lap. “Now I want to know if I got the right things.”

 

Dib took the bag, having rather wanted to just hold Zim, but did as he was told and looked inside.

 

He reached in and began pulling things out. Various sweet snacks and several magazines. He pulled those out to find a local travel and sightseeing guide, which he ignored and sat aside, and various paranormal and sci-fi magazines like _'Crop Circles'._ Then the crown jewel: A special, limited fan edition magazine of  _ ‘Mysterious Mysteries of Strange Mystery’! _

 

“Zim!” he cried, holding it up wide-eyed. “I thought this was all sold out!” As he'd been stuck between boarding skool and the institution, and not allowed to have anything that even hinted to his paranormal interests and obsessions, he had missed out on this special edition magazine's release.

 

“So, Zim has executed his mission with success? - The Dib is happy?”

 

Dib nodded enthusiastically - “Yes!” - and threw his arms around the ruby-eyed Irken. “Zim, this is… H-how did you even know??”

 

“Oh,  _ puh-lease, _ Dib! - An invader’s primary goal is to gather information, learning about the target planet and its inhabitants,” he explained, waving his hand dismissively. “Granted it was to find out their  _ weaknesses,  _ but… -” He eyed the nearly bouncing Dib thoughtfully. “- I’d conclude that I have correctly identified one of  _ yours.” _

 

Dib blinked and cocked his head, giving him a lopsided grin. “I guess you're not so bad at your job as my sister thought.”

 

Zim rolled his eyes, then shuddered. “Well… that’s good...” He cleared his throat nervously, having apparently had second thoughts about whatever he was going to say about Gaz.

 

Dib opened the magazine and went straight to one of the specials. He glanced at Zim beaming, then they crawled into the bed and snuggled up together, Dib using Zim’s chest as a pillow as he read.

  
  


***

  
  


When Dib finally put the magazine down and stretched, he turned to his companion to find Zim had fallen asleep, breathing peacefully with a smile on his face. Curious, for this was a very rare opportunity, Dib decided to watch him.

 

The corner of Zim’s mouth twitched, then one of his antennae flicked. At first just a random twitch once in a while, slowly increasing until both were relatively active. Zim was dreaming, Dib concluded, smiling to himself.

 

Zim squirmed, inhaling deeply, and his smile grew. Dib grinned, deciding that his companion looked quite cute and he wondered what the ruby-eyed Irken was dreaming about.

 

The dream remained rather mild and pleasant, which Dib was glad for. He'd hoped his companion wouldn't just always be plagued with nightmares whenever he closed his eyes now, since Dib had talked him out of deleting his memories of the rape.

 

Then Dib began to wonder again what Irkens dreamed _about._ What _Zim_ dreamed about. He once would've guessed the ex-invader dreamed about conquering Earth and enslaving the humans, but now that Zim’s priorities had seemed to change, what then?

 

He watched as Zim’s antennae began positively dancing.

 

_ “Yes…” _ Zim murmured as the pointed tip of his tongue slipped out and he licked his lips.  _ “Mmm…” _

 

Dib cocked his head. It sounded to him like a  _ very _ _good_ dream, and his cheeks heated up. Could it be that he was accidentally catching his companion in a _naughty_ dream? Did the ruby-eyed Irken actually _have_ those? Probably, and his cheeks heated up more at the thought.

 

He felt like he should probably leave the room, to afford Zim his privacy, but... where could he go? To the bathroom? Go hide himself in the bathroom? Leaving the room certainly was out of the question and Dib didn't actually want to go anywhere, especially not if it was away from Zim.

 

 _“Mmmm…”_ Zim shifted again, raising a hand slightly, then laying it back down and arched his back in a stretch. His mouth opened slightly, then closed and he smiled again as the tip of his tongue hung out once more, his antennae restless.  _Ohhh…”_ And a sweat broke out on Zim’s brow.

 

Dib really SHOULD leave Zim to his privacy, or even wake him up, but he found it fascinating. He'd never observed anyone having a good dream before, especially a _sexy_ one, and he was so curious.  He glanced down towards Zim’s lap, wondering if there’d be a tent, then looked again, this time his gaze lingering, for it was just too difficult to tell under the uniform if Zim was hard or not. Then Dib looked back up at Zim’s face, the Irken’s smile still there with the sweat now glistening on his brow and his antennae engaged in a lively dance. - _Whatever_ his companion was dreaming, Zim was clearly enjoying it and Dib couldn't help enjoying watching this little show.

 

_ “Mmm…” _

 

What _was_ his ruby-eyed companion dreaming about? This was  _ fascinating. _ It was totally a wet dream, he was positive, for there was just _no way_ Zim could be THAT happy in it without it being naughty!

 

He looked down again at Zim’s crotch, the uniform infuriatingly concealing everything. If he'd really want to know for sure, he'd have to look closer, under the shirt. He blushed at the bold thought and debated it for a moment, then curiosity simply won out and he decided to.

 

He reached for Zim’s uniform shirt and, hand trembling nervously, he pulled it up to reveal his companion's abdomen. However, the black uniform pants, form fitting though they were, also revealed nothing in the dim light. 

 

Curiosity still getting the better of him, Dib glanced up to Zim again to find he still looked blissful, apparently not disturbed by Dib's actions so far. 

 

Dib turned back to look at his companion's crotch, so desperately wanting to know, and reached out a shaking hand toward him. Would he dare touch Zim? He  _ would, _ he decided,  and placed his hand hesitantly on Zim’s lap.  _ ‘Oh, please don't wake up… and please don't hate me…’ _ he silently plead.

 

In his fear, he had only touched Zim's leg, then he tentatively slid his hand between them and towards his companion, then  _ BAM!  _ There it was: Zim was standing proudly at attention!

 

 

Zim didn't seem to mind any of this in the least, however, for he squirmed - _"Mmmm..!"_  - and his hips rocked slightly, causing him to rub against Dib’s hand.

 

Blushing furiously now, Dib forced himself to remove his hand, lest he totally grope him. This was all just too much for him and he felt bad, he _shouldn't_ have touched Zim, not without his permission like that and doing so was just not the kind of person he was or wanted to be!  He wanted to go hide in the bathroom in shame as he beat himself up mentally, but he couldn't make himself go that far from Zim. He wished Zim would wake up and be over it. Instead, his companion showed no signs of doing anything less than enjoying his dream further, so Dib curled up against against the ruby-eyed ex-invader, feeling like the biggest jerk.

 

Zim was having a hot dream and Dib wished he'd known what it was about. - He firmly told himself he did NOT wish it was about him. Secretly.

  
  


***

  
  


Dib awakened, whether nighttime or daytime he didn't even know anymore, to find Zim on his tablet as usual, this time with what appeared to be wireless earbuds over his ear holes on either side of his head. The ruby-eyed Irken’s antennae were flicking about, and the longer Dib observed the more they seemed to be doing so in a rhythm. Now really curious as to what could possibly be up and causing such a response in his companion, Dib sat up and scooted so he was sitting right next to him.

 

Ever alert to his charge, Zim removed one and turned to him. “Morning, Dib. Sleep well?”

 

Dib glanced at the window, the curtains closed but no light shown in through the crack, belying Zim’s claim of it being dawn, then he turned back to Zim and nodded. “Yeah… - What are you listening to?”

 

“Oh!” Zim chuckled sheepishly and shook his head. “It... it’s nothing. - You were sleeping, so I just... figured it’d be alright, if I… er...”

 

Dib then flashed him a cheshire grin. “Wait, are you listening to… _MUSIC,_ Zim?”

 

Now Zim blushed, looking positively like he’d just been caught with his non-existent nose in a _porn_ magazine.

 

“Oh, you ARE!” Dib cried, delighted with his discovery. “You actually listen to MUSIC, Zim?? I'm surprised at you!”

 

Zim began to sweat. “No! Well… _maybe..?”_

 

“I want to hear it!” Dib gasped, grinning like it was Christmas. He just _had_ to know what kind of music the ex-invader would listen to.

 

“W-well… ok…”

 

Instead of handing over the headphones, Zim tipped on his tablet, Dib unable to tell what he was doing since it was all in Irken Script, and with one last tip, the first bars of… - _“Zim, is that… BEETHOVEN??”_ \- began playing over the speaker.

 

Zim cocked his head.”Who?”

 

“Beethoven,” Dib repeated. “This is totally a Beethoven song! I know because my dad used to make us listen to his music when we were little - You know, because he believed it would make us smarter or something.”

 

Zim blinked. “No… it’s… -” He looked at the text on his screen. “- ...O riginally composed by a deaf human.” He squinted at the screen. “A Luhd-weeg vaan Beee…” He struggled, making faces as he tried to read it correctly from the Irken text on the screen.

 

“Beethoven, Zim, it’s  _ Beethoven!” _ Dib interrupted, finding this all far too fascinating to let the other get him bogged down on details, like the pronunciation of the German composer's name. _“Oh, Zim!”_ he teased in mock horror. “I’m so surprised at you! I had no idea! - Hey, you actually LIKE Earth things, don’t you??”

 

Zim gulped. “It’s… well… th-this did need some help, actually, so…” He tipped on his tablet and the swiped. The song restarted, the first bars of _‘Moonlight Sonata’_ played again, then took on a decidedly alien and techno twist.

 

“You  _ remixed _ it??” Dib gasped after a bit.

 

“As I said, it needed help, so I… _helped_ it. - It’s actually an impressive composition, I never would have thought hyoomans were capable of this level of music, but… it desperately needed work, so I figured I'd just go ahead and make it better.”

 

As the music played, Zim cranked up the volume and pulled Dib to him. His antennae flicked in rhythm and he began conducting with his finger in the air.

 

Dib chuckled and rested against his companion, closing his eyes as he listened too. He could get behind his companion's taste in music, he decided, and enjoyed the song with Zim's revisions. He felt his own antennae begin dancing to the rhythm as well.

 

After a few minutes, Zim suddenly turned to look at Dib in his arm and caressed his jaw. “May I please kiss you?”

 

Dib gave a start and his mouth fell open. “Wha-  _ k-kiss _ me? You want to  _ kiss me?” _

 

Zim nodded. “I just think it would be really nice right now, since I get to share my music with you. - So, may I?”

 

Dib cringed, blushing. “Well, I…” His gaze landed on his companion’s lips as he remembered the other times Zim had kissed him. He'd _liked_ them, he _hated_ that he'd liked them, but he had, and the idea suddenly struck him as... kind of compelling. So, “I-I guess… ok, ok… - But _only_ a kiss, ok?”

 

Zim positively beamed and nodded, then, holding him with one arm around the waist, he reached up and cupped Dib’s cheek with the other, then closed his eyes and brushed his lips against Dib’s.

 

Dib closed his eyes too, hardly believing what he was doing with his ruby-eyed companion, then reached up and rested his hand on Zim’s chest because it just seemed like the right thing to do.

 

Zim didn't seem to have a differing opinion of the touch and continued to give him light and tender kisses. He lowly deepened it, parting his lips to take Dib’s between them and drew his tongue lightly against them.

 

Dib shuddered and surrendered to Zim, unwittingly parting his lips in an attempt to return the kiss, while hoping desperately not to screw it up in his inexperience.

 

Zim cradled his head and licked again, silently asking permission, and when Dib parted his lips further, Zim slipped his pointy tongue between them and ran it along Dib’s.

 

Dib gasped and stiffened in surprise, but decided he didn't want to stop it. Curious, he brushed his tongue against his companion's and discovered that Zim didn't even taste _bad_ to him. Even worse, he actually tasted _good._

 

Zim held him tighter and curled his tongue around Dib’s, entwining them together as he explored more of Dib’s mouth. “Mmm,” he moaned into the kiss and, without breaking it, lowered Dib back onto the bed and mounted him, pressing their chests together, his hip partially resting on Dib's, but kept their groins at a respectable distance from each other.

 

Dib whimpered into Zim’s mouth, suddenly afraid that the ruby-eyed Irken was about to take it too far anyway.

 

Zim simply continued the kiss, then very slowly withdrew his tongue and gave Dib another kiss, not seeming to mind that it was a wet kiss now. Then he slowly retreated with a final, tender kiss and gazed adoringly down at his wide-eyed and out of breath companion as he licked his lips. He caressed Dib's jaw, then gently dried both his and Dib’s lips with his gloved hand. “How was that, my Sweetling?”

 

Dib's heart was pounding wildly in his chest and didn't think he could find his voice, if he ever found it again, and could only manage to shrug. He felt like crying. How could he react so strongly to Zim’s affections like this?? He  _ wasn't _ gay! He wasn't! Not even for Zim! Definitely not even for Zim!  Apparently his body disagreed with him, though, because he was fully saluting the ex-invader, and it  _ throbbed. _

 

“Do you want more?” Zim purred, looking as though he’d love nothing more than to give Dib all the ‘more’ he could ask for.

 

Dib quickly shook his head. He’d  _ explode _ from more, he was positive of it! And he didn't want to do anything he'd regret. He needed to sort this all out first! He needed to, for he found it all too confusing and he didn't understand the reaction his body had to his companion. How could he even feel that way at all?

 

Zim raised up to his knees, then helped Dib sit up.

 

Too ashamed, Dib couldn't look Zim in the eyes and his cheeks were burning with embarrassment. He attempted to hide the tent he was pitching, as he felt so wrong for it, and gulped against his shame.

 

“Dib?” Zim asked, now looking at him in concern.

 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered as he placed both of his hands over his crotch as though that would make it any better or less obvious. “I don't know what… what’s wrong with me…” He could feel his eyes beginning to sting.

 

Zim touched his shoulder with one hand and placed the other over Dib’s. “Because of this?” He gave Dib’s hand a few light taps.

 

“You _know_ about that?” he croaked, though it wasn't like he had believed this would escape his companion's attention. His embarrassment and shame beginning to get overwhelming and he shut his stinging eyes tightly, trying not to lose it completely while being acutely aware that there was only his own hand plus a thin layer of clothing between his erection and Zim’s hand. “I-I’m so sorry…” he whimpered and sniffled.

 

“Don’t be.” Zim raised his hand and wiped Dib’s eyes. He cupped his face. “This is  _ exactly _ how you should react to a kiss from ZIM.”

 

He looked up, though couldn't quite meet the ruby eyes. “You-you’re not... mad?”

 

Zim hugged him to his chest, then caressed his cheek. “Of course not.” The ruby-eyed Irken sat back, settling against the headboard in a nest of pillows he’d made, and took Dib’s hand. “I liked the kiss too,” he said and pressed Dib’s hand right to his uniformed crotch. "See?"

 

Dib’s breath caught in his throat and he blushed harder, feeling Zim’s large and hot erection beneath his palm and he froze, gaping at his hand.

 

“So, the Dib also effects Zim.”

 

“Y-you're so...  _ big _ , Zim! ” Certainly bigger than he was, and bigger than he'd expected Zim to be.

 

Zim smiled proudly. “I know.” He arched his hips a little and rubbed against Dib’s palm, clearly enjoying the stimulation.

 

Dib suddenly yanked his hand away, lest this go too far. “Y-your uniform really… h-hides it!” he cried lamely, trying to find anything to break the all too intimate and awkward moment.

 

Zim chuckled and held his arms out for Dib and, thinking about it for a moment, Dib cuddled up to him, still blushing and feeling strange and ashamed of himself.

 

“I-I have to tell you something…” Dib began quietly as his gaze came to rest once again at Zim’s crotch, the uniform shirt concealing it perfectly. “You’ll probably hate me, but... some time ago you were sleeping and dreaming… I guess it was a really _good_ dream, because you were… smiling and your antennae were jumping all around and… well... I-I’m sorry, but...  _ butItouchedyou!” _

 

"Hm?" Zim blinked, raising a non-existent eyebrow in question. “What did you do, Dib?”

 

“I...  _ t-touched _ you…  _ there.” _

 

“Oh… well I _did_ have a very nice dream sometime yesterday,” Zim considered aloud, then cocked his head and grinned a little at Dib. “And did you _like_ touching me in my sleep?”

 

Dib shook his head quickly. “I shouldn't have… I didn't mean to molest you, I was just… very curious because I-I’ve never seen anyone have that kind of dream before… I’m really sorry and… if you hate me and never want to speak to me again, I-I’ll under-understand…” His voice broke at the idea and he almost sobbed.

 

Zim laughed. “Oh, Dib,” he purred, then reached up and touched Dib’s cheeks. “I couldn't hate you for that.”

 

Dib glanced up, wide-eyed. “R-really?”

 

“Really, my little Sweetling.” He adjusted, thrusting upwards with his hips. “If you're curious, you're welcome to touch me again.”

 

Dib looked down, then shook his head. “I-I’m not ready for that…”

 

Zim shrugged and waved his hand dismissively. “Then not...” He reached up and took one of Dib’s antennae between his fingers, giving it a delicious stroke.

 

“Ziiimm,” Dib moaned and squirmed. 

 

Zim continued and Dib curled up, clinging to his chest, his head bent forward. Zim reached to his bottom and guided him to sit in his lap, pressing him against his hard-on.

 

Dib didn't protest, he didn't want to, he was so terribly turned on despite himself. So, he shut his eyes, still clinging as he settled against his companion, and enjoyed each stroke and caress. When Zim used his other hand and started pleasuring both antennae, Dib moaned, taking a fistfull of Zim’s uniform.

 

“Oh, yes, Dib,” Zim purred and intensified his touches.

 

Dib squirmed, his bottom rubbing intimately against Zim and he decided he didn't even care. Under Zim’s continued  and knowing ministrations, he gasped and moaned, the sensations more intense than he'd remembered, and in no time at all, he felt like he was going to lose it. “Z-Ziiiimm, I’m… I’m gonna… I…” He grit his teeth and moaned through his nose.

 

“Yes! Cry for ZIM!” Zim said in his ear hole as he continued stroking and caressing all the way to the very ends, then took hold of one and pulled it down. He took it in his mouth and Dib cried out in surprise as the delicious warmth of Zim's mouth enveloped the sensitive appendage. Zim ran his tongue along the tip, then flicked it gently. He repeated  the action again and again, licking, then flicking the sensitive and shuddering appendage.

 

“AH, _Z-ZII-III-IIM!”_ Dib cried out just as he felt himself lose control, then his entire body clenched up and shuddered with his sudden and unexpectedly hard climax, soaking the front of the Irken underwear. He collapsed against Zim with a moan and began gasping for air, and the Irken released his antennae to wrap his arms around him.

 

Zim kissed his head. “That’s my good little Sweetling. - Feel better?”

 

Dib nodded, unable to find his voice, his heart pounding furiously as he tried to catch his breath.

 

“Very good,” Zim purred again.

 

Dib thought about the hard-on his butt was pressed against. “I… I should help  _ you _ now, I guess…” He didn't WANT to and was pretty sure he'd be nowhere near as good at it as Zim seemed to be, but he just felt bad for Zim.

 

“You don't have to, Dib. - I just want you to enjoy yours.” He cuddled Dib close and kissed his head again.

 

It took Dib a few long moments before he could speak anymore and he had to catch his breath and come back down at least a little. He tried to ignore how ashamed he felt for having done that with Zim again, especially since, this time, he didn't even have the excuse of not knowing what was going to happen. Worse still, he'd  _ wanted _ it. And it had been  _ delicious. _

 

“I’m still not gay,” he stated firmly, not even sure why he felt it need to be said.

 

“Do you mean… happy or homosexual this time?”

 

“Homosexual. I’m not _homosexual,_ Zim, I’m NOT!”

 

“Oh, Dib.” Zim shook his head. “I never said you were.”

 

“This _makes_ me gay, though.” He poked dejectedly at the logo on his soiled underwear.

 

“Oh, don't be silly.” Zim clicked his tongue. “You and your stupid hyooman misconceptions. - You need to stop this! Because they are _WRONG!”_

 

Dib sighed sadly. “What do you mean now, Zim?”

 

“You said I’m the only one you’ve ever felt this way about, right?”

 

Dib thought about it for a moment. Had he said that? He shrugged. “I dunno, I guess… yeah, pretty much.”

 

“And does it really  _ matter _ if I have a penis or not?”

 

Dib raised his head and gave him a confused look. “I don't follow you.”

 

“Is it  _ my penis _ you want or is it  _ me?” _ Zim held his hand to his chest to punctuate the last word.

 

Dib’s mouth fell open. “I-I…” He'd never thought of it like that before.

 

“Are you attracted to  _ other _ bearers of the penes, or are you just attracted to  _ Zim,  _ who merely happens to be one as well?”

 

Dib looked down and rubbed his head as he thought about it. “I-I think it’s… only been you. I've never felt like this for...  _ anyone _ else, though I haven't really had the chance either. No one’s ever done any of this stuff with me before.” He reached for Zim’s hand and held it, just wanting to have that physical connection. “I guess I also don't really think I’d ever feel even _close_ to this way about anyone else, though. - I’ve never even  _ wanted _ to do stuff like this with anyone else.”

 

Zim squeezed his hand affectionately, then gently brushed Dib’s exhausted antennae back. “You see? You don't have to be homosexual or heterosexual or anything else.”

 

Dib looked up at and met his eyes, saying nothing.

 

“Just be Zim’s,” he purred and leaned forward until their lips brushed, then kissed once softly and withdrew.

  
  
  


***


	18. Chapter 16, cont'd...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Originally, this was going to be part of chapter 17, but then I just feel like it needs to stand alone. It could've gone to on the end of chapter 16, but it really just felt like 16 had to be ended where it did and then left for a bit, for the impact.
> 
> So, on that note, it's quite short.

# Chapter 16, cont'd...  
  


_‘Just be Zim’s.’_

 

The words had stayed with Dib ever since, even though he hadn't said anything to it at the time. The ruby-eyed Irken generally had made a good point: He didn't _care_ if Zim had a penis or not. Zim was his friend, his _best_ friend, and it had only been coincidence he was also male. Being male, however, did give them an area where they could relate.

 

Zim seemed to have as active a body as Dib did, moreso perhaps, and could understand things Dib doubted a female would have, such as morning wood, wet dreams, and all things related to having a penis.

 

Zim came out of the bathroom - after having helped Dib mess his pants and underwear earlier, he’d also provided Dib with fresh clean ones, again with the purple one-eyed Irken logo on the crotch, then they’d switched and Zim had taken his turn in the bathroom - though what Zim had been doing in the bathroom for the last while, Dib didn't know. When he came out, he looked refreshed and smelled of Irken Cleansing Chalk, however.

 

Dib wondered if Zim had been in there long enough to have actually touched himself to climax. Did the ex-invader even DO that? Maybe masturbation was frowned upon in the Irken Empire, for all he knew. He certainly didn't dare ask.

 

Zim joined him on the bed and crawled over him, straddling his lap and ducking in for a quick greeting kiss, then smiled and settled down next to Dib.

 

That was something Dib was still trying to get used to: Zim’s apparently having decided that kissing was now a go. However, in his defense, Dib had never made a move to actually deter him, even if he also never actually _returned_ it. Each time, even if he actually saw it coming, it still just surprised him too much. He was grateful that Zim seemed to keep it at quick pecks rather than heavy face-sucking.

 

“So, my Sweetling,” Zim placed his hand on Dib’s tummy - another thing the ruby-eyed Irken had done was to get somewhat bolder with touches - and looked up at him. “How are you feeling?”

 

Dib shrugged and laid his hand over Zim’s. - Fortunately, Zim never seemed to touch him in places or ways that made him feel uncomfortable, and he was very attentive to how Dib reacted at any given moment. - “I don't know,” he admitted. It seemed to be his natural state and the answer he always gave.

 

Zim smiled warmly at him. “Are you hungry, thirsty, or is there anything else I can do to make you feel better?”

 

Zim was always patient, never seeming to mind Dib’s confusion or vague replies. And he wanted to pamper him. Dib wondered if that was like being in a relationship, having a boyfriend or lover.

 

_‘Just be Zim’s.’_

 

Emotion overcame him all of a sudden and he literally threw himself into Zim’s lap, curling up and burying his face against his companion’s chest. He cried for no reason he could fathom, yet it seemed it was for all the reasons in the universe.

 

“I guess I _won't_ ask if I should suck on your antennae then,” Zim purred tenderly and wrapped his arms around him, always ready and available to tend to the amber-eyed Irken. Never seeming to mind the tears and snot that soaked his uniform top, or the way Dib crumpled it in his fist.

 

_‘Just be Zim’s.’_

 

As though that were the answer to everything. It would be, too, Dib had a feeling. But he was afraid to be anyone’s. Afraid to give himself over to someone, even Zim, more than he already had. He was a burden. He owed Zim so much, his very life, and would forever be in the ex-invader’s debt, but that didn't mean he was ready to belong fully.

 

_‘Just be Zim’s.’_

 

What did that even mean and why would Zim want _him??_

 

Feeling miserable and full of self-doubt as well as loathing, Dib wept pitifully into Zim’s chest, ignoring the comment about sucking his antennae.

 

“Oh, Dib,” Zim purred softly. “It’s ok… Whatever it is, it’s ok. - Zim is here.”

 

“Zim,” he whined, unable to find any more words.

 

Zim rested his cheek against Dib’s head, careful not to pinch his antennae between them too hard, and stroked his back. “I’ve got you and… whatever it is, I’ll keep you safe, my little Sweetling.”

 

Dib realised he'd come to really like it when Zim called him that, though at first it had sounded strange to him. He wondered what he could call Zim in return. He would ask later when he’d calmed down again.

 

When his sobs subsided and he could be quiet enough, he laid his ear hole against Zim’s chest and listened to the sound of his heart beating.

 

_‘Just be Zim’s.’_

 

“I can’t,” Dib murmured softly and wiped at his nose and cheeks.

 

“Dib? You can't what?” Zim asked, still holding him and resting his cheek on him.

 

“Zim’s… I-I can't be Zim’s.” He wanted to be, but it was far too scary of a prospect. _‘Especially because…’_

 

“And why can't you be Zim’s?” If the ex-invader was hurt or surprised by Dib’s words, his voice didn't reveal it.

 

_‘Especially because…’_ “I’m scared… I’m scared of what that would mean,” ‘ _to BE Zim’s.’_

 

Zim chuckled softly, a kind and warm sound, not mocking or derisive. “When you're not scared anymore, let me know, ok?”

 

Dib blinked. Zim wasn't mad at him? “Zim… why don't you hate me?”

 

“Oh, Dib.” Zim shook his head, then kissed the top of Dib’s head between his antennae. He wiped Dib’s cheeks, then laid his hand over Dib’s, the one in which Dib still had a fist full of the uniform shirt. “You worry too much.”

 

Dib sniffled, feeling terrible and wishing he could work right.

 

“I could never hate you.”

 

Dib didn't feel reassured as he should've, and just blew out a sigh, starting to feel exhausted from having cried.

 

Zim cuddled him. “I could never hate you for that, Dib, because… you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong.” He tilted Dib’s chin up a little and warm ruby eyes met wet amber ones. “Maybe someday you will change your mind, until then, I already have everything I need: My Dib, my Sweetling; whatever part of you that you choose to share with me, -” He emphasized it with a kiss to his forehead and brushed his thumb over Dib’s lips. “- And that's enough.”

 

Dib looked at Zim, blinking as he tried to grasp Zim’s words.

 

Was this what it was like to be cared for? Truly cared for? Is that what Zim was doing? Caring for him? - Dib felt tears stinging again.  


  


***

 


	19. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Took a bit longer than I'd expected - should've been Thursday or Friday at the very latest, but things got in the way (mostly I was too tired). But for that, you're actually getting the next chapter soon (after I've given it a last proof-read).

# Chapter 17

 

They were stretched out on the bed on their tummies watching TV, because both were tired of their other ways of keeping busy - magazines and tablet primarily - and they'd turned it on now, specifically, because there was an episode of _‘Mysterious Mysteries of Strange Mystery’_ which Dib hadn't wanted to miss after having been forced to miss out on so many over the last three years. For the occasion, they were sharing the snacks Zim had purchased and had them spread out at the foot of the bed for easy access.

 

It wasn't turning out to be a very great episode, unfortunately, and Dib sighed. “I already sent them stuff about this _years_ ago,” he complained, gesturing in frustration. “Why didn't they include any of that??”

 

 _“The patterns stamped in the fields were treated as a lens through which the initiated could witness the activity of Earth energies and ancient spirits, the anguish of Mother Earth in the face of impending ecological doom, and of secret weapons testing and, of course, aliens,”_ the Host on TV read.

 

Zim meanwhile had laid his lower leg over Dib’s, entwining them a little and occasionally brushing his toes against Dib’s foot, their boots discarded on the floor.

 

The ex-invader stopped and rolled his eyes. “I have never left any circles in your crops of wheat! - Why would anyone even do that?!” He gestured in frustration with his hand.

 

Dib shrugged. “Communication, maybe? Or claiming the Earth… - _‘Zim was here’?”_ He couldn't help teasing with the last part.

 

Zim laughed and reached out to cup his cheek, wiping cookie crumbs from Dib’s lips with his thumb. “Mmm, I can think of much more… _pleasant_ ways to leave my _mark.”_ He leaned in and kissed Dib softly on the lips. “Wouldn't you say?”

 

Dib blushed and looked down, then gave a small nod. It _was_ more pleasant than making crop circles, he supposed.

 

_“More after these messages.”_

 

From there, a commercial with a man singing began, the stamp _‘Choctaw Nation of Oklahoma’_ was displayed at the bottom of the screen.

 

Dib blinked as he stared at the screen. “Why are we seeing an ad about Oklahoma?”

 

Zim shrugged. “Probably because we’re in a place called Oklahoma City?”

 

Dib turned to his companion, wide-eyed. “We ARE?? What are we doing here??”

 

Zim gave a lopsided grin. “Running an experiment on how The Sweetening effects cute little human-turned-Irkens. - One of the side effects seems to be a certain obliviousness to what is going on around them.”

 

Dib picked up a lollypop and thwapped him on the shoulder with it. “Oh, would you be serious!? I’m not oblivious! I wasn't feeling good when you brought me here, remember??”

 

“I know,” Zim replied softly and procured the travel guide that Dib had ignored from his PAK. “Anyway… I read once that there are a lot of paranormal things here, so I just thought you might like that, but then this happened and I had to find a hotel quickly and we happened to be in Oklahoma City.”

 

“Oh…” Dib didn't know what to say to that, even touched by Zim’s thinking of him. He looked down and fidgeted with the sheets, not sure how to react to the gesture. No one had ever thought of him and his interests before, let alone wanting to take him someplace he might like. “Th-thanks.” Only his former rival. _Only Zim._

 

They turned back to the TV, Zim breaking a piece of chocolate from a bar he’d bought and offering it to Dib, which the amber-eyed Irken only noticed when it brushed his lips and he gave a small start.

 

“Oh! Thank-”

 

Zim slipped it into his mouth before he could finish his sentence, so he closed it and enjoyed the chocolate, thanking Zim with his eyes as the ex-invader broke off a second for himself.

 

“Hyoomans look so weird,” Zim commented when the commercial had ended.

 

“They do?”

 

Zim nodded. “It’s one species, but they come in so many different... _colours,_ kind of like the Plookesians, you know?”

 

Dib thought about this and looked at Zim, then back at his own hands, considering them.

 

“It was really confusing when I first got here…” the ruby-eyed Irken went on. “And sometimes it still is.”

 

Dib placed his hand on Zim’s head to compare their skin tones. “Hmm, so… Irkens are all the same shades of green?”

 

Zim blinked and looked at him, then shrugged and took off one of his gloves, displaying his bare hand for Dib.

 

Dib placed his own next to Zim’s and they both looked, then Zim slipped his hand under Dib’s, palm up and closed his fingers, entwining them with the amber-eyed Irken's.

 

Zim’s hand felt warm and smooth and Dib closed his fingers around Zim’s as well.

 

“I think you’re just a little paler than me, actually…” Zim observed finally, turning them over and back a couple times, then caressed Dib’s hand with his naked thumb. “But you were pale as a hyooman, too.”

 

Dib had trouble seeing any difference in their skin tones and was, instead, more fascinated by Zim’s claws anyway. He had them too, but Zim’s were larger and longer, and they also looked tougher. It made sense since Zim was older and a trained soldier, he figured. How often had Zim had to use his claws against someone?

 

It also felt surprisingly nice to be skin-to-skin with his companion and his antennae twitched a few times. Curious, he opened his hand, releasing their hold, and rubbed it lightly against Zim’s palm. He glanced nervously at his companion to find Zim was observing him silently. “S-sorry, I…” he mumbled, blushing.

 

Zim caressed his hand, applying a little more pressure than Dib had dared. “Mmm... Nice?”

 

Dib nodded as he watched and felt. “Y-your skin is so smooth…” Then he blushed even harder and looked away. “Sorry, that was really dumb.”

 

Zim continued the caresses. “No, it wasn't, Dib.”

 

Dib then sighed contentedly and, feeling oddly lulled by the feeling of his companion’s actions, laid his head down on the bed, looking up at the ruby-eyed Irken as he enjoyed the touch.

 

Zim withdrew his hand and slipped off his other glove, then took hold of Dib’s again. With his other, he caressed the amber-eyed Irken’s cheek, then drew his thumb lightly over his lips.

 

Dib closed his eyes so he could feel the new sensation. Zim’s gloves were nice enough whenever Zim had touched him with them on, but this was different: It was warmer and better, and certainly more intimate.

 

Zim leaned over him and kissed his temple. “My little Sweetling,” he purred softly near Dib’s ear hole. “Do you like this?”

 

Dib nodded once, neither opening his eyes, nor wanting to speak.

 

“May I touch your antennae? Just for a moment?”

 

Dib gave a start, his eyes snapping open. “I-I…” He was suddenly curious, though felt ashamed. “O-ok, but… not too much, ok? I-I don't want to mess any more pants again… _please…”_

 

Zim smiled, nodding, and slid his hand up along Dib’s face until he’d reached the top of his head and gently took an antenna between his bare fingers.

 

Dib couldn't breathe, so nervous and fretting over what he’d experience that his antenna jumped away as though startled by the unexpected touch.

 

Zim simply captured it again and caressed it, careful not to hurt it, then gave it a tender stroke.

 

“Oh!” Dib gasped. Whether it was more intense this way or not, he didn't know, but the smoothness and warmth of Zim’s skin definitely gave it a new sensation. A _delicious_ one.

 

Zim stroked the length slowly, all the way to the tip, and teased the end between his fingers.

 

Dib came alive with a start and his hand shot up, stopping Zim as he shuddered. “N-no more!” He drew his companion’s hand away. "S-stop."

 

Zim allowed him to remove his hand and warmly kissed his head. “Of course, Dib.”

 

Dib panted and shook his head, chills running up his spine, and he hid his face. “I’m sorry…”

 

Zim put his arm around him and pulled him close, embracing him gently. “No sorries. You can always stop me; haven't you realised that by now?”

 

Touched, but still blushing, Dib moved to bury his face in Zim’s shoulder, then, in a moment of pure spontaneousness, he kissed the uniformed arm; Zim squeezed his hand warmly, then both turned back to the TV. Dib hoped the distraction would calm the unwanted tightening in his crotch.

 

As Dib watched the rest of the episode, he sighed and shook his head. They hadn't used _any_ of the stuff he'd sent, and he'd sent lots. _Furthermore,_ the crop circles they had shown were ones Dib had already determined were all fakes and he’d even sent evidence of that. Why should he have expected otherwise? He could only remember them using any of his stuff once or twice, maybe a few times, when they had literally nothing else and were desperate; and they had never been satisfying for him at all. He'd still hoped.

 

“Well, that was horribly _stupid,”_ Zim announced as the series' end credits rolled.

 

“They… never believed me…” Dib murmured, unable to hold back how forlorn he felt.

 

“Dib?”

 

“I-I sent them so much… and not just about crop circles, but also about alien structures on our planet.”

 

Zim turned to him in horror. “You _told_ them about MY BASE?!”

 

Dib jumped, startled, then shook his head. “Well, I-I mean, _yes,_ I-I _tried_ to, but no one ever cared about that,” he admitted. “No, I mean other things and places.” He traced shapes into the sheets and sighed again. “There are all _kinds_ of weird structures scattered over the entire planet that couldn't _possibly_ be human-made. I hoped they'd investigate those.”

 

“Hmm…” Zim scratched his chin.

 

Dib suddenly had an idea and turned to look at his companion. “Zim! D-do you think we could go look at one? I mean… then you could tell me if I’m _right.”_

 

“I thought you wanted to go to Area 51.”

 

“I-I still do and… and the structures don't _really_ matter anymore, I guess... but I…” He paused, giving Zim a pleading look. “Just _one,_ Zim, so I… know if I’m not just _insane_ like they all say. _Please?”_

 

“Oh… Well…” Zim murmured, his antennae falling. “We… we can go to any you want, Dib.”

 

“Th-thanks…” He closed his eyes and laid his head against Zim’s shoulder, unbelievably relieved. "Really. Thank you so, so _much,_ Zim."

 

“Anything, Dib, if it means that much to you.”

 

Dib quickly nodded, then sighed as he decided to confess something to the ruby-eyed Irken. “In... in the institution they… went through all my stuff I brought with me and.... whatever _else_ my dad gave them…” He laid his head down on the bed and gazed sadly at Zim’s arm, though hardly seeing it as memories played in his mind. “They would spend _hours_ using it as an example to show me how… how _messed up_ I am. - Like they stole the journal I was keeping all my suspicions and notes and things in, and... made me listen as they picked it all apart. E-every word and scribble...”

 

“Dib…” Zim frowned and squeezed his hand.

 

“The-the only thing that I could hang on to, to not be _brainwashed completely_ was…” He looked up to Zim. “Because of _you._ Because I could hang onto the knowledge that _you were real!_  - That I didn't make _you_ up!” Now he squeezed Zim’s hand, though it was a weak gesture. “There really was _a real live alien_ in my class. - No one could _take that away_ from me... no... no matter _how hard_ they tried.”

 

Zim remained silent, seeming not to know what to say or do, which was fine with Dib at the moment.

 

“But they _almost_ succeeded,” he went on, gaze back to Zim’s arm. “I-I almost believed that you were just… a-a foreign kid with a skin condition…” And he felt ashamed for it beyond words and it wrenched at his heart. He felt like such a traitor. “Th-three _years,_ Zim, while they tried to find cures for both my DNA and my… my _insanty.”_

 

Zim swallowed and, when he spoke, it was in a tiny, appologetic voice. “I-I should've gone looking for you…”

 

“You probably wouldn't have found me… _I-I_ couldn't have even found me…” He'd been lost, both figuratively and litterally. He hadn't known where he'd been shipped off to, nor had he been left alone long enough to sneak off and explore. He'd been watched around the clock and escorted between the institution and boarding-skool.

 

The ex-invader's antennae shot up and he snapped, “nonsense! For I AM _ZIM!_ \- When have I _ever_ not been able to find you??”

 

Dib blinked, his gaze darting to his companion, then back to Zim's uniformed shoulder and he closed his eyes. “The last three years,” he said quietly and forelornly.

 

He felt Zim lay down close to him, so close he could feel the soft breath. _Mint and cinnamon._

 

“You… you are right. I-I should've looked harder… I’m sorry.”

 

Dib blinked, having never thought he'd hear _Zim_ say that to him ever. It both warmed his heart and wrenched it. “And... and that's why I had to see you when I first got home… I-I had to know that... that I'm not just _crazy._  - That you... you exist and... I-I'm not just _crazy.”_

 

“Look at me,” Zim said suddenly, sitting up and cupping both Dib’s cheeks with his bare hands. “Look at me, Dib! -  I _am_ real and so are _you_ and _everything_ you remember from before: Me stealing the organs of all the _horrid_  little wormbabies in skool when I got headpidgeons; me sending you _into space,_ through that wormhole, to your _moosy fate;_  YOU and your _spooky-sister_ fighting Tak with me; and _me…”_ Zim gulped. “B-being inside your GUTS and deleting your memory of the video. - It’s _all_ real. They were _wrong!”_

 

Dib laid his hand over Zim’s, pressing it to his cheek, thankful beyond words to hear that from someone else. Someone else had experienced that too. _Zim._

 

“It’s all in my brainmeats, Dib-stink; and besides, -” He caressed Dib’s hand. “- I even have _video proof_ back at my base.”

 

Dib closed his eyes. “Th-thank you, Zim.”

  


***


	20. Chapter 18

#  Chapter 18

  
  


Dib was in the restroom, naked and carefully cleaning himself up using the cleansing chalk. The night had been particularly fitful for him because of The Sweetening, and he felt all clammy and icky.

 

His companion was waiting patiently outside, pacing a circle into the floor so _very patient_ he was at being separated from Dib.

 

Still, Zim was giving him his privacy, so Dib didn't mind. He looked himself over more closely, including his genitals. He noticed they weren't as green as they had been before when he stretched the skin. It almost looked pinkish or perhaps even purplish, though he had trouble telling for sure.

 

Then he reached down farther, again looking for the magical presence of a vagina and, again, finding absolutely nothing of the sort. It was all the same as he'd always had, minus the colouration. He shook his head and sighed, wondering if Zim had just been pulling his leg when he’d said Dib could get pregnant.

 

He finished cleaning up and pulled on his underwear and pants. By now, he had decided the Irken uniform underwear were actually comfortable. They never seemed to pinch or ride, which he certainly liked, and they also seemed to support his package, keeping it in place and even making it seem more discreet somehow. Maybe the lack of hair had something to do with that? He didn't know. Either way, he decided he actually liked them better than his boxers despite the skimpiness.

 

Shirtless, because he was feeling too hot, he left the room and returned to Zim. “Done… sorry.”

 

Zim greeted him with a kiss and embraced him, then they headed back to the bed and their pillow nest.

 

Dib settled in and snuggled up against his companion. “Zim, I just don't understand it: HOW am I supposed to be able to get pregnant? I checked again and there’s still  _ nothing _ like a vagina there! Am I supposed to grow one still?”

 

Zim shook his head, looking baffled. “No, why should you?”

 

Dib threw his hands up and grabbed his antennae, yanking on them in frustration.  _ “How can I get pregnant?! _ What, am I supposed to just SWALLOW your sperm or something??”

 

Zim blinked, then laughed, shaking his head as he carefully freed Dib’s antennae from the abuse. “No, how would that work? Your _mouth_ doesn't lead to your _uterus!”_

 

“Then  _ HOW?!?” _ Dib cried, closing his hands on Zim’s gloved ones.

 

“I could show you, you know.”

 

Dib cocked his head. “What do you mean, you could  _ show _ me?”

 

Zim licked his lips and grinned at Dib. “I could  _ have sex _ with you and see if I get you pregnant.”

 

“NO!” Dib cried and then groaned. “Goddamnit, Zim! Would you just  _ tell _ me already?!”

 

Zim’s antennae fell. “Pity. That would've been more fun.” Then Zim took a breath and considered, scratching his chin. “You know, I… This is actually all just so  normal to me that I never thought I’d need to explain it to anyone… - Hmm...”

 

“Does that mean you  _ don't know?” _

 

“No, no…” Zim replied, still thinking about it. “Um, what do you actually know about sex and getting pregnant?”

 

_“All_ the human things, including that males  _ can't get pregnant!” _

 

“Well, do you know how males have sex?”

 

“Maybe, but since I bet you're just  _ dying _ to tell me, go ahead, I’m  _ all _ ears.”

 

“Well, you do have  _ one _ hole down there, so I would… penetrate you there.” At those words, Zim inhaled sharply and trembled a little, then licked his lips. “Mm… - And if both of us are actually fertile, then you  _ might _ get pregnant and… -” He placed his hand on Dib’s tummy for emphasis. “- C-carry Zim’s smeets.”

 

Dib blushed, for his companion was practically drooling on himself over the thought. “And  _ how _ would Zim’s sperm _actually_ get from _there_ to my eggs and uterus? Or is a smeet supposed to just grow inside my  _ butt?” _ Silly as that sounded, he felt like he literally wouldn't be surprised if that’s how this alien biology worked.

 

Zim laughed. “No… no… You… you have a tube deep inside that connects to your uterus and ovaria.”

 

“A tube? Inside my  _ butt?!” _

 

Zim nodded. “So, my  _ sperma _ would pass through it and travel to your ovum - or  _ ova, _ more likely - if you're ovulating.”

 

“I’m gonna be sick…” Dib placed his hands on his head and rubbed it, feeling miserable. “But...  _you_ don't actually know for sure if  _ you're _ fertile or not?”

 

Zim shook his head. “But just in case I  _ am, _ I always used the preservative.”

 

Dib looked up. “The what?”

 

“Preservative. So that I wouldn't get my boyfriend pregnant. you know?”

 

Dib’s mouth fell open and he gaped at Zim, his heart wrenching in his chest. “B-boyfriend? You… you have a…  _ boyfriend?” _ he managed to force out, though only in a whisper. The idea hurt so bad, he thought he was going to break down altogether.

 

“No, that… that was a long time ago, back in training when I was going through The Tartening. - He liked my… Tartling  _ attributes _ during sex, so we-”

 

“Y-you had  _ sex _ with him??”

 

“Oh, Dib, I  _ told _ you I wasn't a virgin!”

 

“I-I thought that was because of the… the rape!” He tried not to sniffle, feeling his eyes beginning to sting.

 

“No, Dib. - You don't have to worry, anyway, because we weren't together long. He didn't treat me all that well, because of my _height;_ and.... then I also had to find out he’d also been using me too. - I caught him with  _ another _ Tartling.” Zim’s gaze was cast towards the ceiling, as though he was looking through it into space. “I haven't dated since.”

 

The amount of relief Dib felt upon hearing that, though he felt sorry for what Zim had been through, was astounding to him. “I-I’m sorry, Zim. - Th-this is why I’ve never wanted to date, I guess… I know it would happen to me.” The tear escaped. For no reason he could explain, he just did not like the idea that Zim had had another. Why should it bother him? It shouldn't. _It didn't._  


 

“Not if you date the  _ right _ Irken. - For example,  _ I _ would never do that to you.”

 

Dib sighed, _that again,_ and shook his head. “Zim, I’m _not_ in-”

 

“Not ready yet, I know,” Zim interrupted and wiped his cheek. “It’s ok.”

 

Dib sighed and laid his head on his companion’s shoulder as he tried to sort out his thoughts, his heart still aching. He didn't know which was worse: That Zim had had a boyfriend with whom he'd _had sex,_ or that Zim had been betrayed. Both of those things hurt. He felt like such a pathetic virgin.

 

“I’m sorry, Zim, that… that he hurt you.”

 

Zim shrugged and sighed. “I… lived…”

 

“Did you love him?”

 

Again Zim shrugged. “I… lived…” he repeated simply.

 

Dib sniffed, not feeling at all comfortable or satisfied with that answer. It sounded to him like Zim had been in love, which he did _not_ like at all. For no good reason.

 

“I-I guess at 163 years old, I… can't expect you to have waited…” He didn't know what he wanted to say. That Zim hadn't waited for… for  _ what? _  - For  _ HIM? _   -Dib raised his head suddenly and shook it, trying to clear it. He was just confusing himself more and more by the minute.

 

He blew out a sigh, then gave a start when he realized the ruby-eyed Irken was watching him intensely.

 

“Um… what?”

 

Zim narrowed his eyes. “Are you…  _ jealous?” _

 

“What?! No! I-I just don't like that someone hurt my best friend!” Then he gave a firm nod, hoping that would convince the ex-invader of his  _ true _ intentions.

 

“Hmm…” Zim seemed to consider this for a moment, then then he moved forward so he was fully in Dib’s line of sight. “So, it’s ONLY because of that? It DOESN'T bother you  _ at all _ to imagine me KISSING him and tangling my TONGUE with his, like I did  _ yours _ and rubbing his antennae, _like I did_ _ yours?? _ Or me on top of him _all naked_ and skin-to-skin as I THRUST into him again and AGAIN, PANTING and MOANING and calling out  _ his name _ until I-”

 

_ “STOP!” _ Dib cried suddenly, shutting his eyes tight and covering his ears as he shook his head briskly, trying to clear the images away. “JUST _STOP IT, ZIM!”_

 

When he finally lowered his hands and opened his eyes, they were wet and he wiped angrily at them.

 

Zim sat back, folding his arms. “So, you're NOT jealous  _ at all.” _ His tone was sarcastic and it ripped at Dib’s heart.

 

“I-I…” Dib gulped and then shot him a tormented glare. “You’re such a jerk, you… JERK!”

 

“I think we've sufficiently solved that.”

 

Dib sat back and wrapped his arms around himself, bowed his head and shut his eyes tight. The images Zim had described tormenting him as they tore at his heart. He hated, nay,  _ loathed _ himself for the way he felt. He was NOT jealous, Zim was WRONG! He HAD to be! Jealousy only happened when you were in l…  _ in LOVE! _ \- or a _creep_ -  both of which he _so_ was NOT!

 

“I’m not jealous, _Zim,"_ he growled. "I’m  _ not,” ‘...in love with you.’ _

 

“Just shut up, _Dib,”_ Zim simply hissed.

 

At that, Dib lost it and a sob took him, doubling him over and his shoulders trembled as the tears rolled down his cheeks. He buried his face in his hands, feeling heartbroken and furious beyond words with the ex-invader. - And he  _ hated _  himself for it!

  
  


***

  
  


After their row, neither had said another word to each other, Dib weeping in silence and Zim seething in silence. Until finally…

 

“...Oh, Dib…” Zim blew out a heavy sigh as he reached for his anguished companion and pulled him close. _“Come_ _ here, _ my Sweetling. - Come to Zim.”

 

“N-no…” Dib tried feebly to push him away, but was too weak, while the ex-invader was both stronger and not having it, and Dib gave up on his struggles, allowing Zim to scoop him up and cuddle him in his lap.

 

Zim brushed Dib’s antennae back, then gently tilted his head up and wiped his eyes. “Dib, just…" He met his eyes whether Dib wanted to or not. "The  _ next time _ when I indicate I don't want to discuss something anymore, then DROP it instead of  _ pushing me! _  ...Understand?”

 

Feeling exhausted and ashamed, Dib sniffled and choked on his tears, and Zim pressed the amber-eyed Irken’s head to his chest, tucking it under his chin, and curled protectively around him. Dib closed his eyes, listening to the rhythmic thump of Zim’s heart, and took a fistful of the uniform.

 

When he had no more tears left, Dib forced himself to open his mouth. “Z-Zim, I…” He swallowed and settled for a whisper. “I-I didn't know you wanted to stop talking, I…” He trailed off, not knowing what else to add and not feeling like anything he said was going to matter anyway. When had it ever? To  _ anyone? _

 

Zim wiped the amber eyes again. “How was I  _ not _ obvious? Why… why do you think I got  _ so upset?” _

 

Dib could only shrug, feeling too miserable and sure that this was yet more evidence that he still didn't work right.

 

When he got no answer, Zim huffed.  _ “Fine! _ \- So what do I have to do to make it clear when I need you to back off?”

 

Dib shrugged. “I-I don't know… I’d probably not even get it if you just  _ told me  _ to back off…”

 

“Well, maybe  _ now _ you will. - Or do you want a code word or… a hand signal or something?”

 

“I don't know…”

 

“Oh, come on, Dib! Help me out here!”

 

Dib sighed and raised his head a little. “L-like what kind of a code word?”

 

“I don't know… ‘time out’, like the kids always said at skool while playing their  _ horrible human games?” _

 

Dib shrugged and wiped his eyes. Zim was  _ serious _ about this? He raised his head and antennae to glance up at his companion. “I-I guess ‘time out’ is ok… but… I-I’ll probably just screw that up too.” Then his antennae fell back down.

 

“I’m afraid you will just have to learn,” Zim replied matter-of-factly.

 

“It’s pointless, I’ll never get  _ anything _ right.”

 

Zim held a deep breath, then slowly released it. “Note to ZiM: The Sweetening has even  _ mightier _ mood swings than The Tartening.”

 

Dib couldn't help it and raised his head. “What are you talking about, Zim? I’m not having mood swings!”

 

“P.S. to ZiM:  _ Denial _ is another strong symptom.”

 

“Damnit, Zim!” Dib cried, raising his head to fully look at his companion. “I'm not  _ in denial _ either!”

 

Zim raised his hand - “Yes, you are.” - and tapped Dib’s lips in rhythm with each word.

 

As Dib opened his mouth to protest, Zim removed his finger and replaced it with his lips, cutting Dib off with a kiss.

 

He drew back. “Now, that is ENOUGH insubordination from you,  _ little smeet!” _ he snapped, then licked Dib’s lips. “How’s that for a code word for you to stop pushing Zim?”

 

Dib groaned. “Zim, don't you even think you get to start bossing me around!”

 

“But I  _ like _ it so!” Zim whined, pouting.

 

Dib huffed and shook his head. He still did't like that Zim had had a boyfriend, and still didn't like that he didn't like it.

 

“Anyway…” Zim began, sounding unsure. “The… the point is just… there are things I don't want to talk about and… you have to respect that.”

 

Still angry, Dib told himself he wasn't going to give in, he wasn't going to fall for it no matter how right Zim thought he was. Or how wrong he knew  _ he _ was himself. He  _ wouldn't. _

 

“Ok, Zim...”

 

Damnit, he  _ would. _ For some reason, defying his companion had caused an ache in his heart that was even worse than the way he’d felt about Zim having had a boyfriend, no… a  _ lover.  _ He sighed and laid his head on Zim’s chest. He hated himself.

  
  


***

 


	21. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> God, I am not doing this again. So did a test run in posting the new chapter via mobile and that is just TOO nuts. Like it is doable, but dang, crap happens. And just blah, too difficult. Sticking with posting via the computer.
> 
> Anyway, hope you like this one.

# Chapter 19

 

Dib stumbled to the bathroom, only half awake even though there was light shining in through the curtains. He felt odd, though his symptoms weren't acting up as bad as they used to, for which he was relieved.

 

This didn't mean, however, that he felt completely better. He still felt a longing to be near Zim, one that had him trying to hurry through his business, he realized and halted himself. He carefully cleaned up and looked in the mirror to try and fix his hair.

 

However, only the very _hairless,_ amber-eyed Irken stared back at him from the mirror and he blinked, then sighed. Would he be able get used to his new reflection? As his symptoms had always been so strong before, he hadn't paid much attention to his appearance; but now where he could actually focus a little, he took the time to inspect himself a little despite his desire to get back to his ruby-eyed companion.

 

Dib closed an eye and leaned in closer to the glass to inspect his own alien eyes. He opened both again and turned his head from side to side. There was absolutely no pupil or change in colour in any way. Shiny monochrome eyes of warm amber that appeared to glitter in the bathroom light.

 

He suddenly imagined Zim’s and how they glittered a beautiful ruby in the sunlight. _‘The prettiest eyes I've ever- NO!’_ He quickly halted the thought and shook his head. He glanced to the door, envisioning his companion on the other side. Unwittingly, his lips curved up in a small smile, then he shook his head even harder.

 

Pushing the image as well as the unwanted feelings it incurred firmly out of his mind, he turned back to the mirror and looked up to his antennae, then raised and lowered them on command. He smiled. It was getting easier for him every day. He could now hold them down on command, for the most part, to keep his wig on. If something surprised him, he certainly lost control and they stood up, but he was thrilled over having more influence over the strange appendages than he had in the beginning.

 

Then he did it again, just faster, and tried moving them in opposing directions. That didn't work at all. He tried a few more times, until it began hurting and he feared he’d pull a muscle or break them or whatever happened to Irken antennae when you over-strained them.

 

He sighed and finally left the room to find Zim pacing, antennae down against his head.

 

“Uh… I-I’m done so… you can stop that now.”

 

Zim’s antennae raised and, stopping in his tracks, he looked over at Dib. Silently, he walked up to his companion and looked up into his eyes.

 

Dib pursed his eyebrows at his companion’s odd behaviour. “Something… wrong, Zim?” Normally Zim would've kissed him in greeting.

 

“I…” He exhaled and reached up to touch Dib’s cheek. “I’m just not sure I want to take you out of the hotel.”

 

“What?! You can't just keep me locked up in here forever!”

 

Zim folded his arms and glanced down. “I know.”

 

Dib put his hand on Zim’s shoulder. “Well… then what’s wrong?”

 

Zim turned back to him and slipped his arms around Dib’s neck, then pulled him down for that kiss Dib had originally expected. He lingered on his lips and inhaled slowly.

 

Enjoying the way Zim’s lips felt against his, Dib inhaled too and suddenly noticed a _third_ scent along with the mint and cinnamon he'd been able to identify before. He took another, deeper breath, but couldn't identify it other than something notably spicy and alien to anything he'd ever smelled before. It smelled wonderful and he didn't think he could've dreamed up a more pleasant one if he’d tried.

 

Zim ended the kiss and cupped Dib’s cheek with one hand. “So... _you've_ noticed it too.”

 

“Noticed… what? That you _stink_ like an alien?” he tried to tease, though knew he wasn't convincing.

 

“Exactly.”

 

“Huh? I didn't mean that you actually _smell bad-"_

 

Zim suddenly picked him up bridal style and brought him over to the bed. He swallowed hard, then carefully laid Dib down on it and crawled over him, straddling his hips and placing his hands on Dib’s shoulders.

 

“Um, Zim? What are you..?” All too aware the ruby-eyed Irken’s bottom was pressed against a part of him that he’d rather it hadn't.

 

“Looking at you,” the ruby-eyed Irken replied, his voice suddenly huskier than it had been a moment ago.

 

Under the penetrating gaze, Dib’s felt his cheeks grow hot. “Z-Zim… please…” he whimpered.

 

Zim touched a finger to his lips. “Oh, _relax._ I’m just _looking_ at you and nothing else.”

 

“Yeah, well… This is a little... _weird.”_ He pointed to where Zim was sitting on him. “You know? And… I-I’m getting uncomfortable.” Especially with the heat rushing to his crotch. There was no way Zim wouldn't notice if he started getting hard, which would be positively mortifying and he tried his best to think of un-sexy things to prevent it - like being beaten up and shoved in lockers and toilets, but definitely _not Zim_ sitting on his crotch.

 

Zim caressed the side of his face with the back of his fingers. “Ohhh, you are so… _exquisite,_ my sweeting.” His voice had grown huskier still.

 

“Ok… not any less uncomfortable, Zim.” He swallowed hard, telling himself his companion's tone _didn't_ excite him. “Would you… p-please just let me up now?”

 

Zim smiled at him, admiring him a moment longer, then drew his hand back. “Of course, my Sweetling.” He dismounted to kneel beside Dib and held his hand out.

 

Dib took it and Zim helped him sit up. Dib rubbed his head to calm his blood and looked away as his companion settled into their nest of pillows. “So, er… what’s… going on now?” He settled down next to Zim. “With me, I mean? What... do we _both_ ‘notice’?”

 

“That by my estimation, we can probably recommence with our voyage tomorrow.”

 

“We can finally leave tomorrow morning??” Dib cried excitedly, his previous discomfort and embarrassment all at once forgotten, as well as his question.

 

Zim started to nod, then stopped and scratched his chin. “Well, tomorrow _morning_ might be too soon.”

 

“Oh…” Dib’s antennae fell.

 

“Anyway, before we leave, I want to scan you so I can be sure you're completely through The Sweetening.”

 

Dib thought about that for a moment, remembering what the ruby-eyed Irken had told him about the whole thing. His antennae raised up suddenly. “Wait,” he said as a thought occurred to him. “You said, after this… second puberty thing, I’m going to be like in heat or something, didn't you?”

 

“According to your despicably _wretched_ and _inferior_ Earth concepts, _yes...”_ If his words hadn't been enough, then his tone made it clear, beyond all doubt, how much he still passionately _loathed_ the comparison.

 

Dib chose to ignore the tone. “Well, then... why wouldn’t you have even _more_ problems with me being around other people, if you're rutting or whatever?”

 

“Because you don't want to stay here any longer,” Zim replied simply.

 

Dib blinked, both touched and confused at once. “Wait, so you mean it _won't_ actually be any easier for you?”

 

“If anything, it’ll be _worse,_ my Sweetling.”

 

“Oh…” Dib sighed and looked down at his hands. “Does that mean I have to worry about you _maiming_ people?”

 

“Dib, I’m not _totally_ out of control of myself just because of this.” He looked straight at the amber-eyed Irken, his gaze so hard that Dib looked up and met his eyes. “If _that_ were the case," he continued in pure seriousness. "Then we’d be busy _finding out_ if I can give you smeets.”

 

Dib’s breath caught right in his throat.

 

“But,” Zim continued calmly. “That’s not happening, is it.” It wasn't a question, nor did it need to be.

 

Dib just shook his head, knowing he wouldn't be able to find his voice now if he tried. He tried not to think about the implications of Zim’s words too much. For multiple reasons.

 

“Relax,” Zim said as he leaned back and held his arm out invitingly. “It’s also a different drive, currently. - When you're Sweetening, you're especially fragile and my desire to protect you is _mightier_ than any other!”

 

Dib accepted the offer and snuggled up to Zim, resting his head on the front of his shoulder as he'd done so many times before. He felt a notable reaction to the nearness, including that it relieved what little symptoms he was still having, but, more notably, was that he felt as though  _right here_ was where he was meant to be, and where he _belonged._ He couldn't think of any place in the whole universe where he’d rather be than snuggled up, safe and secure, with his companion. Mint, cinnamon, and a fine alien spice he couldn't identify filled his nostrils and warmed his heart.

 

_‘Just be Zim’s’_

 

The phrase echoed unbidden through his mind. _‘Not yet,’_ he thought to himself as settled in completely and relaxed against his ruby-eyed companion. _‘I want more than just to BE someone’s.’_

 

He felt a gloved finger gently caress his jawline and opened his eyes, half-expecting the ex-invader was looking for a kiss, but Zim was just relaxing, his eyes closed and looking as though he, too, was enjoying being where _he_ belonged: Holding his Sweetling; so Dib closed his eyes again.

 

His body still felt strange, and he became aware of what felt like a cramping deep inside his abdomen. He first tried to ignore it, but it steadily worsened until he decided he’d better ask.

 

“Ok, I’m in pain again, Zim…”

 

“Hmm? What did you say?”

 

He raised his head so he was closer to Zim’s ear hole. “I’m in pain again.”

 

“In pain?” Zim repeated, his tone showing his concern. “What kind of pain?”

 

“I don't know… It-it’s not as bad as the first day and…” Dib paused to consider it. “It feels different somehow. - I don't know, like… like something’s all knotted up.”

 

“Hmm…” Zim scratched his chin as he thought about it. “It’s probably just the last stages of The Sweetening, but I could check if you want.”

 

“Check? How?”

 

“Run a scan with my PAD.”

 

“Oh. Maybe later.” Dib didn't want to move; didn't even want to think about leaving his companion's arms, where he felt safe and cozy, at the moment. “If it gets worse, ok?”

 

“Of course.”

 

Satisfied, Dib laid his head back down. “Oh, uh… if I can get pregnant, that means I have to have eggs or something, right?”

 

“Ova, not eggs like your horrible Earth birds. - Unless you're sterile,” Zim replied.

 

“Ok. Which means I have to have a richly-lined uterus then too, right?” He knew that much about human women.

 

Zim shrugged. “I suppose.”

 

“Well, if I don't get pregnant, then it has to be shed somehow, doesn't it?”

 

“Uhhh…” Zim turned his head and fixed him with a baffled look. “What do you mean?”

 

Dib raised his head again, trying not to sound too irritated with his companion. “Human women shed it every month, as a part of their reproductive cycles, and it can be a lot of blood, so they have to buy things to catch it,” he began spelling it out for his apparently too alien companion. “So, I’m going to have to do that too, right? - Gaz used to send me for stuff sometimes.” The pleasures of being the big brother of a sister like Gaz.

 

Zim raised his head to, still looking baffled. “I… I don't think so, Dib. I've never heard of that. Maybe some _light_ bleeding? I guess?”

 

“Well, it has to go _somewhere,_ doesn't it? I mean, it can't just stay inside me, can it?”

 

“I don't think Irkens have anything like that, Dib. Not even females. - Maybe because we're sterile anyway? I don't know what it was like when we actually had to use sex to reproduce. - Probably you Earthlings are just so inferior and creepy.”

 

Dib sighed and laid back down against Zim, just listening to the alien’s heartbeat. With Zim’s arms wrapped around him again, Dib was overcome by how safe and _cared for_ he felt. At the moment, it all didn't matter so much. As long as he never had to have periods.

 

Making a decision, he raised his head again so that he could look his companion in the eyes. “Zim, it’s… it’s ok that you had a boyfriend once and he was your lover.” As soon as he said it, he blushed at how stupid it sounded. “And… that you don't want to talk about it… That-that’s ok too.”

 

Zim, on the other hand, gaped, blinking, before a huge smile then broke out on his face and he reached around Dib’s head, pulling him in for a kiss.

 

Dib closed his eyes, slipping his own arms around Zim whilst. He felt too awkward to return it properly, but it felt nice right then.

 

Not showing any signs of minding his companion’s stillness, Zim held the kiss, giving him more soft ones, physically appreciating his lips, and caressed the back of Dib’s head whilst.

 

Needing to come up for air, Dib finally returned the kiss once, then drew his head back, his face hot and he sucked in a deep breath.

 

Zim opened his eyes and smiled. “Thank you, Dib.”

 

Just nodding because he didn't know what else to do, he curled back up against the ruby-eyed Irken.

 

“You-you know if… if anyone could see us like this, they’d… think we were _gay.”_

 

“I couldn't be _happier_ than I am right now, my Sweetling.”

 

“Oh, I… I didn't mean ‘happy’, I meant-”

 

“I know, Dib; but _I_ meant ‘happy.” He squeezed Dib warmly.

 

Dib smiled and laid his head back down, agreeing with his companion’s feelings. He felt _happy_ in Zim’s arms.

 

 ***

 

The next morning, Zim caught him next to a fresh food cart as Dib came out of the bathroom.

 

“Dib, the 17th anniversary of your day of birth is coming up.”

 

Dib shrugged and nodded. “Yeah, I guess.”

 

Zim slipped his arms around Dib’s waist and pulled him close. “And I think it is an important one for hyoomans.”

 

Dib liked the embrace more than he should, and tried not to blush. “Yeah, I’ll be 18; which means I’ll be a legal adult, by Earth law.”

 

Zim cocked his head, narrowing an eye and releasing him. “So you ARE still just a smeet by hyooman terms! - Oh, you filthy Dib, I _knew_ it!”

 

Dib gave a start and glared down at his companion. “What?? Zim, no I’m not!”

 

Unimpressed, Zim raised a hand and poked him in the chest.  “Yes, you are!” he countered. “You are still in your juvenile life stage, little smeet!”

 

Dib pushed Zim’s hand away and folded his arms. “Maybe, but… Zim, I-I’m not a _baby.”_

 

Zim raised himself up on his PAK legs so he was at eye-level with the amber-eyed Irken. “You have to do _everything_ I say.” He grinned like the cheshire cat.

 

“No, I don’t, Zim!”

 

Zim reached under Dib’s chin with one hand and brushed his antennae back with the other. “Yes you do, little smeet, because _I’m_ the adult!”

 

Dib met him with a glare. “Oh, would you just drop it with the bossing me around?! I _told_ you it’s not going to happen! - _Ever!”_

 

Zim continued smiling, though it softened considerably. “Oh, you're such a CUTE little smeet!” Then he closed his eyes and pecked Dib on the lips.

 

Dib sighed. “How can you call me a _smeet_ and still _kiss_ me??”

 

“I am Zim! - Anyway, they're just kisses; it’s not like I’m trying to lay eggs in your smelly GUTS or something!” Then he kissed Dib again and his voice softened. “And, besides, I know you _like_ Zim’s kisses.” He kissed him again. “Or... -” Kiss. “- ...should I... -” Kiss-kiss. “- _...stop?”_ Then he waited instead of kissing Dib again.

 

Dib blushed and looked down, his lips felt rather neglected, then he rubbed his arms self-consciously. “No…” he affirmed in a tiny voice. Zim had him there, for he _did_ like it when Zim kissed him. For no reason he could make sense of, but it was getting harder and harder to deny how he felt.

 

Zim reached under his chin and tilted his head up. “See?” He kissed Dib again, this time lingering a moment before withdrawing, then he lowered back to the floor and smiled up at Dib. “But I am still _the adult_ here and THAT makes me your _authority_ _figure._ \- Obey Zim now!”

 

Dib shook his head firmly. “In your dreams, Spaceboy.” His tongue slipped out and he idly licked his lips, tasting Zim on them. He internally kicked himself, for he did NOT like that as much as he had, and he _knew_ it. Firmly.

 

Zim waved his hand dismissively. “Anyway, I’ve been trying to learn what hyoomans do for the anniversaries of being alive, but… I didn't think a big party with pointy hats of doom and 'fun', stupid games sounded like something you'd want.”

 

Dib’s mouth fell open. So THAT was what Zim was getting at?? He quickly nodded his head. “No, I don't. - I don't like _any_ of that stuff.” He actually hadn't planned to do anything special for his birthday at all, maybe cupcakes and sodas with Gaz. However, it looked like whatever he did, he’d be spending it with Zim instead. Sighing, Dib walked over and sat down on the end of the bed. “Anyway, we don't have to do anything, actually. I mean, you're already taking me on this trip and you saved my life.”

 

Zim shook his head sharply. “Oh, don't be silly! I want to make your birthday the BIRTHDAYEST birthday you've ever had!” He stood before the amber-eyed Irken.

 

He tried not to giggle at his companion’s words and simply gave a half-smile, hoping it looked reassuring. The prospect of spending his 18th birthday with the ruby-eyed Irken excited him and he knew that, whatever Zim might be plotting, it would certainly be memorable. “Well, I have a feeling it'll certainly be the _Zimmiest_ one I’ve ever had.”

 

“Ohhh, yes! It _will_ be!” Zim agreed in a tone that sounded more like the warning of an evil scheme than it did a promise of good tidings.

 

Zim then turned and headed over to the food cart where he uncovered it. He selected their plates of waffles and brought them over to the couch, setting them down on the coffee table.

 

Dib got up and grabbed their utensils and drinks, chocolate milk, then joined his companion.

 

***

 

Finally it was the day they’d get to leave the hotel room and resume their journey, and Dib was more than a little excited. He even hummed to himself as he got cleaned up.

 

When he came out, clad only in a shirt and Irken underwear, he threw his arms around Zim and gave him a quick kiss, to have the ruby-eyed Irken pull him back in for another.

 

“Well, you're certainly in a good mood today, my Sweetling,” Zim purred and brushed his antennae back.

 

“Heh… I’ll just be glad to get out of here and go to the next place with you!” he couldn't help explaining in his enthusiasm. “And.. I-I actually feel great today! Like I didn't have any problems when I was in the bathroom! It’s so nice not to feel dizzy, or to hurt, or have hot and cold flashes… you know?”

 

Zim smiled and kissed him again. “Well, I still want to scan you to make sure,” the ex-invader replied as he looked up, meeting the amber-eyes. “And if it’s not actually over yet, Dib, then we aren't going _anywhere_ today.”

 

Dib quickly nodded. “I-I know. We made an agreement… but I really hope it’s over, though.”

 

Zim released him and went over to the side table, then picked up his tablet. He tapped in commands and swiped the screen.

 

“Should I lay down?” Dib asked as he joined his companion.

 

“As you wish,” the Irken replied without looking up.

 

Dib decided to as laying down was the only way he'd have a chance to hold still for any length of time, if that was even important; so, he crawled up onto the bed and stretched out on his side since laying on his back didn't work well with the PAK. He glanced over at Zim, hoping this was ok, then exhaled, willing himself to relax.

 

Zim, however, was still busy configuring his tablet, then stopped and looked over at Dib. “Ready?” he held it up.

 

Dib nodded and held his breath, shutting his eyes tight.

 

“Ok… done,” Zim announced after a moment.

 

Dib blinked and looked over at him. “Really? That was quick… and... surprisingly painless.”

 

"Not _everything_ we do has to hurt," Zim mumbled, distract as he looked at the screen and sat down next to Dib, and busied himself with his tablet.

 

Dib ignored the comment and sat up, moving so he could look over Zim’s shoulder. Again, all in Irken script, so he didn't understand anything.

 

“One moment, Sweetling,” Zim murmured. “It’s analyzing.”

 

“Ok.”

 

Zim then tapped the display and a holographic image came up. It showed a vague green outline of Dib laying on his side, then zoomed in on his abdomen, showing first his form, then his internal organs, notably his squeedlyspooch.

 

“Man, thing thing still looks weird!” Dib commented. “I can't believe that’s actually _inside_ me.”

 

In the image, deeper in his abdomen still, it indicated a point and blew that up in a window.

 

Dib squinted to try and make out what he was seeing, then turned to Zim. “Ok, and..?”

 

Zim looked up, then pointed to various spots on the larger picture. “That is your new reproductive system: Uterus, ovaria, your fertilisation tube -”

 

Dib blushed heavily. “Ok, ok, I get it! So what’s the verdict? Can we go or not??”

 

Zim glared at him, then turned back to the hologram. “I think- Wait! Wait... One moment...” He paused and leaned closer, narrowing his eyes. “Hmm… now what is _that?”_ He looked back to his tablet, tapped a few things, and the hologram moved upwards and zoomed in between what he had described as Dib’s ovaries and uterus.

 

“What is _what??”_ Dib cried, now suddenly worried. Was he _sick?_ Was his Irken DNA faulty _too?_ Was something _else_ wrong?? He was positive he was about to go crazy!

 

Zim raised his head and pointed to the hologram. “That! What _is_ that?” He tapped on his tablet again and the hologram zoomed in even closer and turned to full colour, displaying a small Y-shaped tube between ovaries and uterus, connecting them, with a tiny speck in it.

 

“I don't _know!_ This is _your_ species’s biology! You tell me what it is! - _What is it??!”_ He tried not to sound hysterical, but if something about his anatomy surprised _Zim,_ he was going to _panic._

 

“I… don't _believe_ this…” Zim murmured aloud, then tapped his display.

 

“Voice command activated,” Zim’s computer’s voice announced. “Yes? What is it _now?”_ it added in a grumble.

 

“Computer: Rescan the Dib!”

 

 _“Fine…_ \- Rescanning. - Complete. - Analyzing data. - Should I project it now too?”

 

“YES!”

 

The hologram shut off, then sprung up again, just showing the larger view of Dib’s internal reproductive system, and all Dib could see was the same as before.

 

“Hmmm…” Zim murmured.

 

“As you can see, very little has changed in the last 11 minutes.”

 

If a computer could sound more withering and annoyed, Dib had yet to meet one. It was as bad as Tak’s ship, but that was literally her downloaded personality.

 

“Your efforts at ‘improving’ his DNA and saving his… _life…_ have been an unexpected success,” it continued.

 

“Oh, shut up!” Zim snapped at the tablet.

 

“WHAT IS _WRONG_ Dib shreaked, fed up with both Zim and his computer, he turned, grabbed his companion’s shoulders, and shook them. “What IS it, Zim?? Am I dying?!”

 

“Oh, just calm down. It’s nothing bad…” Zim carefully removed his hands so he could focus, and turned to affirm his suspicions. He tapped and the point from before zoomed in, revealing even more of the little specks. “That, Dib, means you are…” he trailed off, looking once again, then turned back to Dib. “It means we can go. Your Sweetening is over.”

 

Dib started to cheer, then stopped quickly. “But..! Those things! What _are_ they?”

 

Zim reached up and cupped his cheek, gazing at him in both adoration and wonder. “Ova, my Sweetling. You're _fertile.”_

 

Now Dib felt dizzy and, with a miserable groan, slumped forward against his companion, resting his chin heavily against the uniformed shoulder. He didn't pass out, but his head was _spinning_ with all the new information. Especially the fact that, far as he could tell, this meant he could _actually get pregnant._  - For the first time in his life, he was glad he was neither addicted to, nor even interested in, sex as most boys his age were.

 

“If you decide to have _a litter,_ don't ever ask me to _babysit_ for you,” the computer announced.

 

“Silence PAD computer voice!” Zim snapped. “Close hologram and turn off voice command!” He held Dib, running his hands up and down his companion’s back soothingly. “It’s ok, Dib. In fact, it’s pretty amazing, because I’ve never seen a fertile Sweetling before. I didn't really know what ova even look like.”

 

Dib groaned miserably. “I don't want to get pregnant, Zim. _Ever.”_

 

“Oh, Dib…”

 

“Can you just have me spayed or something?”

 

“Have you what?”

 

“Fixed.”

 

“But… you’re not broken.”

 

Dib exhaled in frustration. “Can you just do _something_ to me so that if I ever _do_ actually have sex, I won't get pregnant? Something _permanent.”_

 

Zim sighed now. “Well, if you have sex with _me,_ I’ll just use the preservative like I always have.”

 

“I don't even know what that is! And what if it doesn't work?”

 

“Impossible! The preservative never fails!”

 

“Well how _could_ it, if you're all infertile anyway? Besides, I still never said it’s going to _be with you_ anyway.”

 

“Dib, this all really isn't bad. - Why does it _bother_ you so much to be fertile and able to carry smeets?”

 

He raised his head to look at Zim, his eyes pleading with the ex-invader to understand. “Because I don't _want_ to carry any smeets! Not yours! Not anyone else’s! Not _ever!”_ Then his gaze dropped between them, though he didn't focus on anything. “It… it’s about the most terrifying thing I can imagine and I… just don't want to.”

 

Zim reached under his chin and gently raised head. “Ok, my Sweetling. But I don't think I can do anything to _you._ \- It’s considered the responsibility of the one with the sperma. - You know, to not make any unwanted smeets, accidentally or otherwise.”

 

Dib blinked. “That… that’s a lot different than here.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Well, it’s usually up to women - which are the _only humans_ who can get pregnant - I mean, we have condoms the guy can wear, but they can break and… a lot of guys don't like wearing them, anyway.” Well, maybe not the only humans, but he didn't really know much about that.

 

“And what do your females do then?”

 

Dib thought about it for a moment. “Well, there are things like the birth-control pill, there’s also a shot, I think. Then there are small surgeries, like to cut the tubes between ovaries and uterus, so no eggs can be fertilised and pass down, you know?”

 

Zim cocked his head. “That doesn't make any sense, pills and shots.”

 

Dib shrugged. “I think they're full of hormones.”

 

Zim’s antennae shot up and he narrowed his eyes. “Wait, hold on.. are you saying hyoomans either pump their females full of _chemicals_ or _cut them open_ just to prevent wormbabies because you males won't be responsible?!”

 

“Uhh…” Dib stammered, taken off guard by Zim’s words. “That’s pretty harsh, but… well… yes? Sorta...”

 

“And these things don't always work? - They don't even sound _safe_ for your females!”

 

Dib shrugged. “Well, the… surgical one does, I think, but I guess it’s pretty iffy with the others. - I guess I’ve also heard that some women can't even take the Pill or Shot.”

 

Zim shook his head. “That is just stupid! - It’s much easier and safer for _me_ to just use the preservative.”

 

“And what if it _fails?”_

 

“Impossible! It destroys all Irken sperma!”

 

Dib sighed, deciding he really didn't want to discuss it anymore. He was also afraid he was accidentally leading Zim on, which he really didn't want to do. He glanced up to Zim, just looking at his companion in silence.

 

Zim met his eyes and pursed his brow, then reached out and took Dib’s chin gently, he brushed the amber-eyed Irken’s antennae back with the other hand, then cupped his cheek. “I’m the _only one_ on this ball of dirt and water who might be able to give you smeets anyway. So… if you’re afraid that I would trick or _force_ you to carry my smeets, then don’t be, my Sweetling, because I would never do that to you, I promise.”

 

Dib's almost smiled. “Really? And… and if it _would_ be with you… if I let you have _sex_ with me-”

 

Zim touched a finger to his lips. “Shhh…” He leaned in and kissed Dib’s lips softly. “You’re not ready yet, Sweetling.” He caressed over Dib’s lower lip, then withdrew his hand.

 

“How can _you_ know if I’m ready or not? Anyway, I just wanted to _ask_ you about it.”

 

Zim narrowed his eyes and poked Dib’s chest. “I will have no insubordination from you, little smeet!” he barked, then stood up and added in a softer tone, “anyway, we’d better pack, though I _do_ have a little request.”

 

Dib looked up. “And that is?”

 

“We don't actually leave yet, instead we make today a test.”

 

Dib gave him a confused look. “What do you mean? What kind of a test?”

 

“We go out, maybe walk around the city and have lunch somewhere. - So, I can see if… it works.”

 

Dib’s antennae fell. “So we… we will come back here?”

 

Zim nodded. “I _swear_ I’m not trying to hold you prisoner; I just want to be sure that I… I really CAN handle us being out there among other people. - If it works out, then we can leave tomorrow, ok?”

 

Dib sighed, but somehow felt Zim was right. He certainly wouldn't want his companion to end up flipping out and hurting people. Making up his mind, he stood up and looked down at the ruby-eyed irken. “Ok, agreed, Zim. We’ll do it that way.”

 

Zim smiled and hugged him. “Thank you, Dib.”

 

***

 

Peering into the mirror, Dib placed his contacts carefully in place and blinked a few times. Zim’s reflection showed up beside his, fully disguised; it looked up at him, glared, and then the spider-legs extended, raising the ex-invader to his height and Dib felt an arm slip around his shoulders.

 

“How do I… look?” Dib asked as he straightened out his wig and smoothed it down, except for the scythe on top. For that, he licked his fingers and smoothed it out, working the ends into a sharp point.

 

Zim gave him a look-over from head to toes, then back up. “Hmm, you always look good to Zim.”

 

Dib blushed. “Th-thanks. You too.”

 

They were packed, though they would be leaving their bags here as they were only going out for a few hours or however long Zim could stand. Still, Dib found he was excited over the prospect of getting out at all - so much so that he didn't mind the idea of returning near as much as he’d thought he would.

 

He smiled at Zim, then blinked as his heart literally leapt at the sight of his companion, now preening his own wig, making sure his pompadour was perfectly in place.

 

It wasn't the wig or Zim’s human disguise that he liked so much in that moment, though, it was Zim, the ruby-eyed ex-invader himself. It did, however, remind him of how he'd first met Zim. The day that new _green_ kid marched into his class and changed Dib’s life forever. He'd known right from the start that Zim was an alien, of course, and how no one else could ever see it, he still didn't know. It had changed his life, though, proved he wasn't just insane and had given him a big purpose in his miserable life. He was the only one who saw Zim for what he really was, and knew what he'd been up to.

 

Overwhelmed, Dib stepped up to Zim and hugged him tightly. “Zim, I…” He halted, trying to find the words to express his feelings in the moment. “Y-you’re so amazing!” He knew Zim would like that.

 

“Yes, yes, I am,” Zim purred and embraced him back. “And… what is so amazing about Zim in this moment that he’s deserved this praise from the Dib-worm? Not that Zim isn't _always_ deserving of such praise from the Dib, but what compels you to emote it just now?”

 

Dib drew back to look into his companion's eyes, now violet from the contact lenses. “You're the _best friend_ I’ve ever had, Zim.”

 

Zim smiled. “You're mine too, Dib. I hated this miserable ball of filth and pain when I first got here, but it was all worth it to find you.”

 

Dib wasn't going to cry, he wasn't; but his heart had never felt so full as when Zim made such professions to him. A friend, a best friend, that thought about him and cared about him. Who knew him and his weaknesses better than anyone else. Who knew who he once was.

 

“So, are you ready, Sweetling?”

 

“One moment.” Dib bent down to kiss Zim, closing his eyes and then delighting as Zim slid an arm behind his head and returned it.

 

Zim quickly took over control and dipped Dib like a bride, kissing him deeply while soft moans escaped the ex-invader’s nose.

 

The passion quickly heightened and Dib suddenly, secretly, wished Zim would haul him over to the bed or even just lay him down right there on the floor, and the realization of that unbidden desire startled the younger, inexperienced Irken. His antennae sprung up and threw his wig off, as he clung to his companion.

 

Zim parted his lips and his serpentine tongue slipped right between Dib’s lips, where it deftly coiled around Dib’s, entwining with his passionately.

 

Dib opened his mouth to offer better access, as well as to try and get more air. He was also panting and felt like he would explode with desire for Zim any moment! He moaned softly into Zim’s mouth.

 

Then, and to his disappointment, Zim slowly withdrew his tongue and ended the kiss. His ruby-eyes had darkened and he looked longingly at Dib, then raised him back up to his feet and held him steady.

 

“Zim…” Dib whimpered, his heart pounding and his blood rushing in his ears.

 

Zim licked his lips, then cleared his throat. “Let… let's go now before I change my mind.” He picked up Dib’s wig, brushed it off, then put it on him and smoothed it carefully into place.

 

Surprised and confused by what he'd just experienced, Dib glanced to the bed, blushed terribly, and simply nodded to Zim as he attempted to catch his breath. What was _wrong_ with him, he wondered. He didn't need or want to be having thoughts like that! Not about Zim or anyone else. Especially not about the ex-invader with the beguiling ruby-eyes.

 

***


	22. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY another chapter. I am so sorry, but I suck and apparently this whole NaNo thing is more demanding than I had thought. Also, life has been happening and that screwed me getting chapters written and proofed and up. Also, ending a story is hard. Not that this is one of the last chapters, as there is still a bunch of plot and a few more chapters to go through, but it's hard to finish it. Mainly I've just been writing the roughs on both and not getting around to proofreading all the written chapters.
> 
> Anyway, without further ado, the next one.
> 
> WARNING: it's another heavy one! PTSD and Disassociation.

#  Chapter 20

  
  


Zim was clearly antsy as they left the hotel and headed to the lobby, and Dib felt sorry for him. He slipped his hand into the ex-invader’s and squeezed. Looking up, Zim smiled and squeezed back, walking the rest of the way to the front desk.

 

The disguised ruby-eyed Irken confronted the clerk. “Good morning, we will be going out for lunch today, but will return for one more night,” he announced.

 

“Of course, Mr. Leon,” the lady replied, then turned to Dib. “Glad to see you're back on your feet again. Are you finally feeling better?”

 

“Uh…” All at once Dib remembered the story Zim had told him about being sick and… Zim’s  _ twin brother! _ He dropped Zim’s hand with a start and stuffed his own into his coat pockets, blushing and unable to meet her eyes. “Y-yeah… mostly… Thanks.” He kept his gaze fastened to the table.

 

Zim slipped an arm around his waist and gave him a little squeeze. “Don't mind him, he's just feeling diffident today, that’s all.”

 

The clerk smiled. “Well, don't you worry about it, just go out and have a nice day with your brother. Enjoy the fresh air.”

 

Zim thanked her and lead Dib outside.

 

Dib let out a heavy sigh. “Man, I was afraid I’d given us away.”

 

“You know, if you keep carrying on like this all the time, my Sweetling, you’ll make me look like a  _ slave-driver.” _

 

Dib raised his head and looked to Zim. “Huh?”

 

“Seriously, all we need to complete the image is to put you in shackles and give me a whip.” He licked his lips as be considered the image he’d painted.

 

Dib blinked and blushed. “So, you think she..?

 

_ “No, _ Dib.” Zim quickly gave him a reassuring squeeze. “I’m just saying you worry too much.”

 

“I just don't want to screw everything up.”

 

“I know,” Zim replied softly, then stopped Dib and turned to him, cupping his cheeks. “Relax, because you’ll do just fine, my little smeet.” He affectionately brushed his thumb over Dib’s lower lip. “And Zim is here.”

 

Dib smiled a little and nodded. “I’ll try.”

 

“Good.”

 

They resumed walking, only stopping shortly at the Voot Cruiser to see if it had been left alone. Dib blinked when he saw it now had wheels and was resting on the ground in the parking lot like any other normal vehicle there.

 

“This thing has wheels?” Dib wondered aloud, reaching out to touch one.

 

“Solid holograms,” Zim, who had walked around to the other side while inspecting it, announced proudly. “I figured since we’ve been staying here so long, if someone does look more closely, it was probably best if it doesn't look like it’s hovering constantly.”

 

Dib nodded and straightened back up. “That was a good idea.”

 

Zim came around and took his hand, leading him towards the street and turning down the sidewalk. After a few paces, Zim stopped and scratched his chin thoughtfully, then smiled up at Dib.

 

“Hmm… Close your eyes.”

 

“Huh, close my eyes? Why?”

 

“Just do it, little smeet. - Like Zim.” He demonstrated by closing his.

 

Dib decided to humour him and did as he’d been told. “Ok, now what?”

 

“Take a slow, deep breath through your nose, focus on all the scents.”

 

Dib shrugged and, eyes still closed, did so.

 

“What do you smell?” Zim asked.

 

“Uhh, I smell… car exhaust, over-heated asphalt, oil, tires, some kind of plants and flowers, freshly mown grass…” He trailed off as there really was only three scents he cared about, and those were: The scents of mint, cinnamon, and alien spice. All perfectly combined and all Zim. 

 

He inhaled again deeply, filling his nose with Zim and savoured it. He'd never liked anyone’s scent this much before, even if they had used a nice perfume or soap. He suddenly wondered what Zim tasted like, fingers or even antennae, and if it was as good as it smelled, then blushed at the unbidden thought.

 

“And Zim,” Dib added in a tiny voice, deciding his ruby-eyed companion may as well know despite his self-consciousness; besides, he figured that was what Zim had been going for with this silly exercise anyway. He also felt his companion deserved a little treat for all he’d done for Dib the last few weeks.

 

The corners of Zim’s mouth turned up in approval. “And do you notice a difference from the last time you smelled these things? Before we entered the hotel?”

 

“I dunno…” He shrugged. “They all seem stronger I guess, but that’s probably just because I've been cooped up in a hotel for a week.”

 

“You said you could smell me amidst all that, right?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Good! But I want to run a little test, so I’m going to walk away to the corner of that street over there -” he pointed to the end of the block. “- and you keep trying to smell me.”

 

“Hm, ok.” Dib had no idea what the point of this was going to be, but Zim certainly had piqued his curiosity.

 

“And keep your eyes closed, little smeet!”

 

Dib opened his eyes and glared at his companion over being called ‘little smeet’ yet again. “Do you really have to keep calling me that?”

 

Zim cocked his head. “Calling you what? You mean ‘Little smeet’?” he replied, smirking as he said it.

 

“Exactly! Would you stop it already?”

 

“Oh, come on!” Zim cried, his tone pouty. “It’s the  _ last day _ I get to; let me enjoy it while I can! - Now, close your eyes and let's begin…  _ little smeet!” _

 

Dib sighed again, but gave in. “Fine, go ahead then…”

 

“And smell for Zim!”

 

_'Right... smell,'_ Dib thought, shaking his head. He then pushed that away and turned his focus onto the task at hand; doing that, he heard the soft and rhythmic click of Zim’s boots on the pavement as he began distancing himself from the amber-eyed Irken. He inhaled deeply, enjoying the scent of Zim that filled his nostrils and made his heart flutter.

 

“Ok,” Zim called, his voice now decidedly distant. “Can you still smell me?”

 

Dib had never stopped smelling him, but took another whiff. “Yeah, I can!” he called back. He opened his eyes and was surprised to find that Zim was a good 50 metres away. He gaped, for he could scent the mint, cinnamon, and spice almost as good as if he were standing right beside Zim. “And you smell really great too, Zim!” he shouted to him, then flinched.  _ ‘Wow, Dib, that didn't sound  _ gay _ at all!’ _ he silently admonished himself.

 

“You too, little smeet!” Zim shouted back.

 

_ ‘And that’s not even gayer.’ _ He sighed and looked around to see if anyone might've heard them, but there didn't seem to be any people around. Feeling a yearning for his companion, he began walking in Zim’s direction.

 

When he’d reached him, he couldn't help himself and embraced him, inhaling deeply. Zim smelled much better up close, with his scent less saturated by all the others.

 

“Anyway, what was the point of all that just now?” He released his companion before it got any more embarrassing. “Or did you just want me to shout to the world how good you smell to me?”

 

Zim laughed and rubbed his hands together. “So, you have  _ seen _ through my EVIL PLAN, little smeet!” He licked his lips and shot Dib a cute grin. “But, actually no. I wanted you to test out your nose, now that you're officially sweeting.”

 

“Oh. So what does it mean that I can still smell you even at that distance?”

 

Zim smiled enigmatically. “Oh... I think I’ll just that for when the time comes.”

 

“Oh come _on!”_ Dib cried, placing his hands on his companion’s shoulders. “It must be something  _ important _ or else you wouldn't be so happy about it!”

 

“You may get down on your knees and  _ beg _ all you want, but my lips are  _ sealed.” _ Then he grinned wickedly. “Actually, you're welcome to just do that anyway. - Please?”

 

“Ziiiim,” Dib whined miserably. “That is never, ever,  _ ever _ going to happen!”

 

“Then ENOUGH insubordination from you, little smeet!” He pinched Dib’s cheek. “Let’s go.” He grabbed Dib's hand.

 

Dib let Zim lead him along down the street with no protest and only a small groan of defeat, then sidled up to his companion and soon fell in step, listening to their boots clicking on the pavement in unison. After a few steps, he  looked up ahead and both suddenly halted in step, for there were a couple humans coming up the street towards them. Dib looked worriedly to his companion to see that Zim was focused, eyes narrowed.

 

“Get behind me,” Zim commanded in a dour whisper.

 

Also fretting, Dib did not have to be asked twice and did so, his heart beginning to pound. Not only because of Zim, but also in fear that they’d notice the two green aliens standing on the sidewalk in broad daylight, despite their disguises.

 

“Relax, Dib,” Zim hissed softly. “I can  _ hear _ you worrying and my ears aren't even very good.”

 

Dib nodded, then took a deep breath and held it.

 

The people, a guy and two women, one holding the guy and the other just walking beside the couple, walked by, chatting and, aside from a mere nod of acknowledgement in passing, went right on their merry way, not appearing to give a care to the two green-skinned boys.

 

After he was sure they were out of earshot, Dib released the breath he was holding. “Phew! That was close! - How was it for you?”

 

Zim shrugged. “I didn't like the blonde female and her smelly perfume much, but it was ok.” Then he turned around to face Dib, his eyes glittering with amusement. “But you  _ really _ need to learn to relax: I could hear your heart  _ pounding _ behind me.”

 

“I can't help it…” Dib whined. “I was so afraid they'd notice something.”

 

“What are you going to do in a  _ crowd? _ \- We'll be  _ fine, _ my Sweetling. No one is going to notice we’re not hyooman.”

 

Dib nodded, somehow feeling soothed by Zim’s words and tone. “Hmm… By the way, do you think we could go get something to drink? I’m thirsty… probably from all that sniffing.”

 

Zim scratched his chin. “I think I saw a coffee shop or something not far from here when I fetched you your reading material the other day.”

 

Dib smiled. “Yeah, that sounds good.” And it sounded exactly like what he wanted at the moment.

 

“Then follow Zim.” He took Dib’s hand and began leading him down the sidewalk.

  
  


***

  
  


True to his word, Zim lead him to a café attached to a bookstore chain.

 

“We can probably get hot chocolate here,” Zim considered aloud.

 

Dib nodded as he took the place in, memories stirring. “I know this... because Gaz and I sometimes used to hang out at one across the street from the boarding skool campus when they’d... let me go.” He reached up and touched his neck, trying to ignore the unbidden memories.

 

Zim turned to the amber-eyed Irken. “Dib? What’s wrong?”

 

Of _course_ Zim would notice his change of mood. But Dib shook his head quickly. “N-nothing, just…" It was hard to admit. He didn't want to. It was shameful for him. What would Zim think of him if he knew? Suddenly, he both wanted to tell Zim everything, but tell him NOTHING as well. He didn't want his companion, his once arch-rival, to know and see how pathetic he felt. He shook his head again, trying to kick away the worries and thoughts. Then he made a decision right there, and: "They.... always made me wear a tracking collar with a hidden camera so they could... monitor me when I left the grounds, even if it was just a few feet across the street.” He didn't say it, but hoped Zim would remember that collar he'd once worn years ago. "It was like that," he mumbled under his breath without realising he'd spoken aloud.

 

If he remembered or even thought of it in that moment, he didn't indicate, instead Zim’s eyes widened with incredulousness and he gasped, gaping at Dib. “Your _own_ _people_ treated you like a _slave?_ _My_ Dib?! _My Sweetling?!”_

 

Dib shrugged. “More like a sick experiment, but yeah…” He sighed, because Zim was actually _right._ “I... I _felt_ like a prisoner, I guess... and... being pushed around and beaten up by the other guys felt like being bullied by inmates.” In fact, the more he thought about it, the more accurate Zim’s analogy seemed. “A prisoner in skool and a fucked up experiment in the Institution.” Between being watched as though he were a prisoner in one place, and being experimented on and brainwashed in the other, he honestly wondered if what Zim and his people had in store for the Earth and mankind really was actually worse.

 

Zim grit his teeth and grabbed his shoulders, looking up at him with intense, even dangerous, seriousness. “I won't let that happen to you ever again. Anyone who tries will have to go through ZIM and his  _ mighty fists!” _

 

Dib couldn't help the small smile that broke out on his face as he listened to his companion. “Let’s… go inside now? It was always nice to sit with Gaz drinking cappuccinos and reading books or doing our skoolwork.” He was sure it’d be even nicer with Zim. He also desperately wanted to drop the subject.

 

Zim nodded and lead him inside, marching up to the displays of snacks near the counter, and looking up at the sign listing products and prices.

 

Dib pursed his brow. “Hmm… how is coffee? I mean, with our… allergies?” He tried to be as discreet as he could.

 

Zim shook his head. “I’m sorry.”

 

“Ok.” Dib simply nodded. Yet another thing he wouldn't get to taste ever again. “Then I’ll just have whatever you’re having, I guess.”

 

This time Zim nodded and turned to the clerk, a young man. “Two hot chocolates, extra whipped cream, please and thank you.”

 

“If he wants coffee, we could do a shot of espresso in it,” the clerk offered.

 

Zim glanced at Dib, who quickly shook his head. “No, just the chocolate,” Dib affirmed. “I-I have, I mean, we have an allergy to it, my brother and I.”

 

“It’s part of the skin condition,” Zim added, tapping his own cheek and indicating the green tone.

 

“Of course, then if you like, take a seat and I’ll bring the chocolates over to you.”

 

“Thanks,” Dib replied, then followed Zim to a quiet and secluded table near the back. There were few people there, which he was more than a little grateful for as he settled down across from Zim, the table small enough that he could reach out and hold his companion’s hand if he needed to. That was probably why Zim chose that table, he decided.

 

Zim settled into his seat and gazed across the table at him for a few moments, then scratched his chin. “I don't know if this is customary to ask, but… I just don't think I’ll get it right if I don't.”

 

“What?” Dib met his eyes, barely able to keep his antennae down where they belonged.

 

Zim leaned forward and placed his hands on the table. “What would you like to do for your birthday? I have one surprise in store for you already, but… Do you maybe want me to take you to a nice restaurant or something?”

 

Dib gave a start, his antennae almost shooting up. “My-my birthday?”

 

“I think hyoomans have to eat something and I want it to be something that will make my Sweetling happy.”

 

Dib gave a half smile. “Zim, that’s nice, but… you really, really don't have to do anything. We can just continue with our journey, that’s enough.”

 

Zim however was now glaring at him. “Have you the brainworms?! - No, little smeet! You will tell Zim what would pleasure you!”

 

Before Dib could answer, the waiter came with their chocolate, startling Dib so that he nearly jumped out of his seat. Only Zim's quick reaction in placing his hand on Dib's head prevented the wig from being thrown off.   
  
Zim then patted it gently in place as Dib held his antennae down with all his might. An endeavour that became much easier once Dib looked up and saw that their waiter was blushing as bad as he was, for they flattened in mortification. It didn't take more than a moment for him to guess why, and Dib wished the floor would just swallow him up.

 

The waiter cleared his throat, clearly trying to keep a professional demeanor. “Could I suggest you save that for when you’re home?”

 

“Save what for when we get home?” Zim asked, cocking his head to the side quizzically.

 

_ “...Pleasuring _ him,” the mortified waiter practically squeaked.

 

Dib let out a groan and bent over the table, burying his face in his arms.

 

“Oh, be off with you, you silly hyooman!” Zim waved his hand, dismissing the waiter.

 

Blinking at being called ‘human’, the waiter shrugged it off and silently did as told. 

 

Zim turned back to Dib. “Dib?”

 

Dib raised his head just enough that he could peak over his arm at his companion. “Can't we go anywhere without you doing or saying something humiliating?”

 

“Sweetling?”

 

“And these… things on my head too!” he whispered angrily and gestured towards the top of his head with a finger, to indicate his hidden antennae. “They're so going to get us in trouble.”

 

He felt Zim’s gloved hand touch his cheek. “You’re doing really well with them. Anyway, you’re not a trained invader, remember? So I'm really not surprised you still have some trouble.”

 

Dib liked the touch despite himself and raised his head up off the table slightly to lean into his companion's hand. He closed his eyes for a moment as Zim caressed him, then opened them again and blew out a sigh.

 

“Your chocolate’s getting cold,” Dib said softly, trying to force his thoughts away from what had happened with the waiter. He straightened up completely and pulled his chocolate towards himself.

 

Zim withdrew his hand and did the same, then took a spoonful of the whipped cream.

 

As they drank their chocolates in silence, Dib watched his companion, hoping it would erase the last of his embarrassment. As Zim brought a spoonful of whipped cream to his mouth, Dib’s gaze landed on the ex-invader’s gloved hand, then he looked down at his own naked one. His claws were small, at least compared to Zim’s, gently curved and sharp looking; along with only having three digits, they were definitely yet another thing that people would likely find odd enough to get suspicious.

 

“Should I wear gloves too?” He raised his head and nodded to Zim’s.

 

Zim looked up. “Hmm? What was that?”

 

“I asked if I should start wearing gloves too? Before someone notices  _ these _ things.” He held his hand out and made clawing motions with his fingers.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“You know, my  _ claws,” _ he said in a low voice.

 

“Oh,” Zim shrugged. “I could give you a pair of mine, if you like.”

 

Dib nodded. “Yeah, I would.”

 

“I may have  _ one _ request, though.”

 

“And what’s that?”

 

Zim smiled at him. “You try on the entire uniform. Just for Zim.”

 

Dib shrugged. “I guess I could do that sometime.”  _ ‘Maybe.’ _ He blinked, suddenly realising he  _ wanted _ to.  _ Wanted _ to grant Zim his request. Wanted to  _ please _ him. “Ok, yeah, yeah, I can do that.” Wanted Zim to  _ smile _ at him. “Anytime you want.”

 

Zim granted him that smile and it lit up his face, even his eyes seemed to glitter a brighter ruby, making Dib feel warm inside and he felt like he could just bask in that forever.

  
  


***

  
  
  


After finishing their chocolates, Dib decided to show Zim around the bookstore. “Books are where you can research about humans, and they're better than those useless facts you keep finding online. Let me show you some of the anatomy books, for example, and encyclopedias.”

 

Zim grabbed his arm, stopping him. “No. Show me  _ your _ favourite books.”

 

Dib stopped and looked down at his friend. “Really?”

 

Nodding, Zim gestured him to lead the way.

 

“Ok…”

 

Somewhat nervous now, he passed on by the non-fiction and scientific aisles, then halted before his favourite aisle. His shoulders suddenly slumped. “I… can't.” He drew in a deep breath and looked, his eyes sweeping along the displays of books of paranormal accounts, but he didn't see any of them. His gaze stopped on the shield that read ‘Para-Science’, looking at it longingly for a moment, then he firmly shook his head. “This is it, but I… I can't go down there,” he mumbled miserably. He hated himself for it.

 

“Why not?”

 

His head suddenly snapped around and he looked at Zim for a moment, then cast his eyes somewhere to the floor. “The... the same reason  _ you _ can't look at flying saucers." He didn't have to look to know Zim had narrowed his eyes at him.

 

“What do you mean?” The ex-invader’s tone was even, but held a clear warning note.

 

“When I was away in boarding skool, I wasn't allowed to. - They were… very persuasive.” He sighed sadly and felt humiliated somehow. He felt as though the psychologists had just managed to humiliate him long-distance in front of Zim. He had to look so stupid, like such a poor fool. “Poor, foolish, little Dib,” he whispered too quietly for his companion to catch.

  
“Oh…” Zim took Dib’s hand, then moved to stand in front of him and took the other. “They… they didn't… hurt you like they did me, did they?”   
  
Dib suddenly yanked his hands away from Zim and spun around, his trench coat billowing out; without a word, he sprang into a full sprint back through the store, making for the doors, which he threw open and dashed outside.   
  
He had no idea where he was going, he just had to run, put as much distance between him and the store as possible.   
  


_ ‘Poor, foolish, little Dib.’ _

 

He felt his feet pounding against the sidewalk, heard the boots clicking with each stride, could feel the wind in his face.   
  
Ahead of him were people on the sidewalk, blocking his escape, and he roughly shoved his way through, knocking them to the side. He heard their surprised and angry shouts, one even made a threat and called him names, but it hardly registered. He kept going.   
  


_ ‘Poor, foolish, little Dib.’ _

  
He turned down another street and kept running, no idea where he was going, nor did he care.   
  
Another obstacle stood in his way, which he made short work of, though stumbled as he landed on the other side; he was able to quickly recover and resumed his desperate flight. He ignored the growl coming from behind him.   
  


_ ‘Poor, foolish, little Dib.’ _

  
He ran until his lungs felt as though they would burst, until his squeedlyspooch ached and his muscles screamed. Darting down streets with literally no plan as to where he was going, just  _ away _ from the danger he perceived to be in. Away from the scientists and psychologists and teachers who messed with him and tormented him.

  
He ran until his legs suddenly gave out and he collapsed to the ground, his knees slammed down against, and ground into, the hard cement. They were probably scraped and bleeding, but he didn't register any pain, nor would he have cared if he did. He doubled over, his palms landing flat against the pavement as he gasped for breath, his entire body trembling. He felt numb, cold, and lost. And terrified.   
  


_ ‘Poor, foolish, little Dib.’ _

 

After a few moments, he balled his fists, curling until his forehead pressed against them, crushing them between skull and cement. Desperate, frustrated sobs burst from him, wracking his shoulders.   
  
The warmth of a gloved hand rested on his back as a presence knelt down beside him. Another reached around him and he felt someone curl over him.   
  
He jerked jerked away from the touch, afraid to be taken ahold of, - “No!” - then a black glove fell into his line of sight and a bare hand cupped the side of his head, smooth skin upon his own clammy and fevered-from-the-exertion skin.   
  


_ Mint and cinnamon and alien spice. _

  
The scent filled Dib’s nostrils, familiar and comforting, and bringing with it a sense of safety and protection; showing him the way back like a beacon in pitch darkness.    
  
His vision focused on the glove that lay next to his hands. Three fingers, smooth and black.   
  
An Invader’s glove. Not the glove of a scientist.   
  
The glove that had tenderly caressed his cheek. Not the glove that had held a cane.   
  
He extended his fingers and closed them around it, pulling it to him. It was still warm and smelled of Zim.   
  
He exhaled a ragged breath, his throat aching from his exertion, and tried to raise his head, then Zim helped him, gently raising his upper body and cuddling him to his chest.   
  
After a few moments he raised his head properly and twisted to look at his companion.   
  
The ruby-eyed ex-invader cupped his cheeks, one hand gloved and one hand bare. “You shouldn’t run away from me like that, little smeet,” he purred, his voice soft and warm and comforting.

  
He held the glove to his heart. “You…  _ found _ me.” His own voice was raw and hoarse.   
  
“I didn't  _ lose _ you.” He wiped Dib’s cheeks.   
  


_ ‘Poor, foolish, little Dib.’ _

  
Dib blinked a few times, then threw himself on Zim. “Don’t let them take me back!” he cried hoarsely, his vocal cords burning with each word. “Don’t let them!” He buried his face into Zim’s neck.

 

_ ‘Poor, foolish, little -” _

 

“I won't. No one is going to take you anywhere, my Sweetling.”

 

_ ‘My Sweetling.’ _

 

That was it, he realized all of a sudden; he understood now!

 

He drew his head back and looked at his companion. He was with Zim, far away from the institution and boarding skool. Far away from those who tried to shatter and erase him.

 

“Z-Zim..?” he whimpered, his throat ached and tightened. “You  _ saved _ me!”

 

“From… the bookstore? Actually... you did that yourself. I just stayed with you and followed you here, but you were quicker with that fence than I expected you would be… and I didn't expect that  _ dog _ on the other side, so I couldn't catch you when you started to fall. I’m sorry.”

 

Now Dib blinked. “Wait… What fence? What  _ dog?? _ What  _ bookstore??  _ Zim, what are you  _ talking _ about? _? _ \- No, wait, I remember the bookstore...”

 

“Now, first just calm down, my little smeet.” Zim brushed his antennae back, then produced his wig. “You dropped this back there, but I was able to grab it before the dog did.” He smoothed the scythe into a point, then placed it back on Dib’s head.

 

“Oh no!” Dib cried, he didn't remember any of what Zim told him, but losing his wig was terrible. “Did-did anyone see??”

 

“I doubt their hyooman eyes could make out anything but a blur.” Zim then got to his feet and helped Dib up. Once certain his companion was steady, his gaze fell to Dib’s knees and he clicked his tongue, then bent down to inspect them.

 

“Ow!” Dib cried as Zim pulled the ripped denim away from his torn and bleeding flesh.

 

Zim dabbed at the blood with his gloved hand and rubbed his fingers together. “Hyooman clothing is just so inefficient!” he spat and straightened back up. He glanced at the glove Dib was still clutching tightly, then raised his bare hand and looked at it, then back to the glove. “I… guess I’ll let you keep that.” He smiled and caressed Dib’s cheek, skin-to-skin.

 

Dib looked at the glove too. “Oh! Uh…” He held his hand out shakely, to offer it to his companion, though couldn't make himself loosen his grip.

 

Zim placed his hand over Dib’s and pushed it back to him. “Keep it, Sweetling. You seem to need it more than I do right now.”

 

“Thanks,” Dib answered gratefully.

 

Zim waved his hand dismissively, then slipped his hands under Dib’s arms and knees, and hoisted him up, cradling him like a bride. “Now I’ll take you back -”

 

Dib stiffened in his arms.

 

“- ...To the  _ hotel, _ not that  _ bore-ding skool prison, _ my Dib.”

 

Dib notably relaxed again.

  
  
  


***

  
  
  


By the time they had returned to the hotel and made it inside, Zim was out of breath and Dib felt bad. Zim still didn't put him down until he’d reached the bed; then once Dib was gently and securely deposited on it, Zim bent over him and braced himself on the bed for support as he caught his breath.

 

He regained it quickly and straightened up after only a minute or two, then looked over at Dib. He cupped his cheek, then slid his hand up along his face and took the edge of the wig between his fingers. He discarded it along with his own on the nightstand, then removed his contacts and held his other hand out for Dib’s, then set them aside too.

 

He glanced to Dib’s ripped pants, then to Dib, and then to his bare hand. He looked down at Dib with a smirk and held up his hand in the amber-eyed Irken’s line of sight, he wiggled his fingers to display his claws. His eyes glittered. “And now, my Sweetling, let me show you what Irken  _ claws _ can do.”

 

Dib looked up at Zim’s hand, the light glinting off the sharp, tinted points. He swallowed nervously.

 

“I’m not going to hurt you, I’m just going to take your pants off.”

 

Dib’s breath caught in his throat and he felt his face heat up.

 

“Just your pants,” Zim added and placed his hand on Dib’s hip. “Ready?”

 

Dib sat up halfway and nodded. “Ok, yeah… j-just my pants, not my underwear.”

 

“That’s what I said,” Zim purred, then unbuttoned and unzipped them - “These things are so weird.” - and took hold of the hem, raising it away from Dib’s skin.

 

In a fluid motion, he swiped a claw along it and the material surrendered immediately and seemingly with minimal effort from Zim. He took ahold of the pant leg and did the same, splitting the fabric like a hot knife through butter all the way to Dib’s ankles. When that was finished, he did the same to the other side.

 

Dib started to kick them off when Zim quickly stopped him, holding his legs firmly in place just above his knees, and shook his head.

 

“Let me.” He took hold of the edges of fabric and carefully peeled them away from Dib’s wounded knees.

 

Dib winced and his eyes stung. He shut them and clenched his teeth, trying not to cry out.

 

“One more, my smeet,” Zim said quietly and set to work on it. This time, he got a cry from Dib by the time he had freed the fabric from open flesh. Zim looked up, then wiped the couple tears Dib had lost. “Hmmm… Alright, here.” A cable extended from his PAK and connected with Dib’s.

 

Dib felt what seemed like a soft jolt inside his brain, then suddenly felt calmed, the pain subsiding as well, and he had the sensation of being drugged as Zim’s cable retreated back into his own PAK.

 

“Did… did we just have Irken sex?” he asked, giving his companion a silly lopsided grin.

 

Zim blinked, meeting his eyes for a moment, then laughed and shook his head. “No. I just told your PAK to release painkillers. It can do that and should've automatically, but yours is configured for a soldier - an  _ Invader _ \- not a civilian, so it doesn't react as soon as it should and then gives you a higher dosage when it does.” Then Zim rubbed his eyes. “I’ll have to try and see if I can adjust that later.”

 

Dib laid back against the bed. “Is that morphine in there? Because it feels like morphine.”

 

Zum narrowed his eyes. “And when have  _ you _ had Morphium?”

 

“In… the Institution…” Dib tried to recall and was suddenly glad he felt disconnected.

 

Now Zim positively glared. “Why would they give you that?”

 

Dib raised a hand and drew circles in the air with his pointer finger, watching how the light glinted off his claw. “Because… To keep me calm and so I wouldn't feel it when they fucked around experimenting on me. You know, trying stuff out to see if it helped, which it usually didn't. It just hurt. It made my whole body burn. - And when I broke free of the… straps binding me down to the table because my body was cramping so hard, they started pumping me full of morphine so it wouldn't happen again.” He hated how it had always seemed to loosen his tongue, at least until it made him too woozy to remember what to do with his mouth and what words are. “But it’s highly addictive, so they couldn't give me much and when it happened anyway, they stopped using it altogether.” He shivered, remembering the withdrawals he’d suffered.

 

“Ugh, filthy, stinky monkeys. Why is everything hyoomans do so…  _ horrible?!” _

 

Dib shrugged. “Anyway, is this gonna knock me out?” He was amazed he didn't seem to be slurring.

 

“No, but it probably wouldn't hurt if you slept when I’m finished here.”

 

Dib blinked and raised his head to see Zim was swabbing at his knees, cleaning the blood. On the bed next to his calves was what he could only guess was some kind of alien first aid kit. When had Zim grabbed that? He tried to sit up so he could see, for he'd never seen Irken blood before.

 

“Help? I want to see too,” he said when his attempts didn't work.

 

Zim reached out and took his hand, then carefully pulled him up into a sitting position. “Are you steady?”

 

Dib raised his other hand with Zim’s glove and clutched it to him. He nodded. “I think so.” Dib then looked down at his knees. They were scraped badly and still actively bleeding. “Man, did I get dragged behind a car, or something?”

 

“You fell from a full sprint and skidded,” Zim replied as he returned to his work. “I would've caught you if you hadn't left me with that fence.”

 

“Ok, what fence, Zim? And how did I leave you? I really don't remember anything after…” He paused as he thought about it for a moment. “After drinking chocolate with you and then… I think… maybe someone startled me?” He shook his head. “I don't know…”

 

“You couldn't go in the aisle labelled ‘Para-Science’.”

 

Dib’s mouth fell open and he sighed sadly. “Oh…” He knew why he wouldn't have been able to go down there, but he didn't want to think about it. Instead, he reached out and touched the pink blood that had pooled in the wounds of one of his knees. “Irken blood is weird. Why is it pink?”

 

“Why do hyoomans have red? That’s a weird colour for blood.”

 

“Well, because it’s iron-based. When iron molecules and oxygen bind, it turns red.”

 

Zim looked at him, then got up and walked over to a dresser; he took something out and Dib heard the ripping sounds of a package being opened. Then Zim returned and, before Dib could ask, the ex-invader took his chin in his bare hand and eased Dib’s mouth open with his thumb, then promptly shoved whatever he’d procured inside.

 

“Now you be  _ quiet, _ little smeet,” he said firmly and turned back to his work cleaning Dib’s knees.

 

Dib tasted chocolate and cake and quickly determined it was a chocolate donut. He raised his hand and, taking a bite, pulled it away from his mouth. When he’d chewed and swallowed, he looked at it sadly, remembering they’d had plans to eat lunch out.

 

“I guess you just can't take me  _ anywhere, _ can you, Zim? I screw everything up, so I guess you can just keep me here  _ forever..” _

 

Zim was now brushing on a salve which, despite the painkillers from his PAK generally numbing him, he could register as cooling and soothing.

 

Zim looked up after he’d finished one knee. “Why would I do that, Dib?”

 

“I mean, we wanted to eat lunch in the city and then I do this in less than an hour! And I don't even remember it!”

 

“In less than a few hours, these will be healed, then I’ll fit you into a pair of superior Invader’s pants and take you out to dinner if you would still like to.”

 

Dib blinked. “You-you’d still be up for it even after what happened? I mean… this test run was a total disaster and it’s  _ all my fault!” _ he cried, so angry with himself for, yet again, proving he didn't work right. Then he looked at his hand for a moment. “Ok, this definitely isn't morphine you’ve got running through me. - It’s not some kind of rape drug, is it?” The moment the words left his mouth, he regretted them terribly, because of what had happened to his companion.

 

Zim either ignored it or didn't make the connection as Dib had, and his voice remained calm as he spoke. “It’s not any chemical hyooman drug at all, your PAK has simply altered your brain’s perception of pain. It tells it that it doesn't hurt. - There, you’re done.”

 

_ “What?? _ This thing can  _ do _ that?! That’s just  _ creepy, _ Zim!”

 

Zim met his eyes. “It’s connected directly to your spinal cord and nervous system, what do you  _ think _ it’s capable of? - It can even protect you when you’re unconscious, saving you from something fatal. - GIR, usually.”

 

“I just want  _ you _ to save me. - Wait,  _ what?! _ Now why on Earth did I say  _ that??” _ he cried, shaking his head. To his consternation Zim, however, was laughing.

 

The ruby-eyed Irken reached out and touched Dib’s lips, lightly brushing his bare thumb over them. “When the time is right, my Sweetling, you’ll understand everything - And thank you. I’ll try to keep saving you as much as you need me to.”

 

Dib rubbed his head, groaning. “Ohhh,  _ nothing _ makes any sense anymore!” And he was far more touched by his companion’s promise than he cared to admit.

 

Zim put his stuff away, then crawled up on the bed and into the pillow nest. “Come here,” he held his arms out and beckoned Dib to him.

 

Compelled by an overwhelming desire to be near his companion, he obliged, setting the rest of the donut on the side table, then cuddled up to Zim and laid his head against the uniformed chest. He held Zim’s glove close, sniffing it once, then raised it and offered it to Zim.

 

“I don't need this anymore. I-I have  _ Zim,” _ he said softly and hoping that didn't sound as stupid as he thought it did.

 

“I don't either.” Still, Zim took it and set it aside, then slipped the other one off as well. “Or this one.” He brushed Dib’s antennae back and kissed near the base. “Now rest. Your new Irken body heals much faster than your hyooman one did, but rest will still help it along.”

 

Dib nodded, trying not to think too much about where Zim’s lips had just been and how they’d already made his antennae tingle deliciously.

 

“And then you get gloves and pants plus a dinner date with Zim.”

 

Dib blushed, but decided not to protest. They’d been going on friend-dates since their whole roadtrip started, after all. So what if Zim just called it a date? Let him have his fun, Dib decided.

 

“Do you think you want the shirt too?”

 

“You mean one just like yours?” He flicked the puffed, triangular shoulders. “What  _ are _ these things for, anyway?”

 

“They look good,” Zim replied, shrugging.

 

“So, it’s  _ just _ a fashion thing?”

 

Zim gently poked Dib’s chest, careful with his claws. “Why does YOUR favourite shirt have a sad smiley face on the chest? Does it serve some purpose other than letting everyone know how miserable you are all the time?”

 

Dib couldn't help giggling, both because it tickled and because Zim had an odd point. “Well, it’s actually  _ ‘Happy Noodle Boy’, _ from a comic. - So… what are these supposed do for  _ you? _ Tell everyone you feel like a triangle?” He turned so he could see his companion’s face.

 

Zim grinned smugly. “They make Zim even more  _ irresistible.” _ The ex-invader licked his lips and gave him a look as though he were salivating for Dib.

 

Dib gawked, unable to believe his ears.  _ “‘Irresistible’?? These _ things?? Are you  _ kidding _ me?! They’re silly!” He fingered one while he spoke.

 

Zim simply closed his eyes. “Soon enough, my doubtful little smeet, you will understand how amazing  _ Irken fashion sense _ is as well too.” He reached up and captured the tip of one of Dib’s antennae between his thumb and forefinger and caressed.

 

Dib’s breath caught in his throat and he squirmed. “Ziiimm, don't…”

 

Zim pulled it close to his mouth and exhaled his warm breath on it.

 

“Ziiii- OH! AH-AH!!” He cried as the ex-invader suddenly closed his mouth over the tip. He collapsed, helpless, against the ruby-eyed Irken. “Z-Zim…” he croaked, having to struggle to formulate words as Zim’s tongue ran slowly along the tip. “If you make me mess my pants again, I swear I’ll never speak to you again!”

 

Zim gave him another long and slow lick, to where Dib began to fear the ex-invader was just going to ignore him this time.

 

“Please,” he begged in a whimper.

 

One last flick of his tongue and Zim released the excited appendage, and it twitched and flicked about. Dib laid back with a relieved sigh.

 

“By the way, you scared me that you weren't going to  _ stop _ this time, Zim!” he grumbled accusingly.

 

“It’s true I like to play with you, but I would never do something you have not only not explicitly agreed to, but especially when you've told me  _ not _ to.” He embraced Dib warmly. “I’m sorry if I worried you this time, it was hard to let go, because you just  _ taste so good.” _

 

“Oh… well… maybe later… ok?”

 

“As you wish, my Sweetling.”

 

Dib nodded quickly. “I know you’ll probably think it’s stupid, but everytime I,  _ you know, _ I just feel bad afterwards, like I did something wrong. And… and I get angry at myself for giving in! And-and especially for  _ liking _ it!” He hadn’t meant to shout, but once he’d spoken the first words, it was like a floodgate.

 

Zim sighed. “Perhaps I went too fast with you.”

 

“What do you mean? It’s not  _ your _ fault, it’s  _ mine! _ I mean, I  _ like _ it, but also hate that I do!

 

“Hmm… And would it help if I told you that it’s ok to like it?”

 

Dib blinked. “Huh? How should that help?”

 

“Oh, because  _ I _ am the older Irken here with the most experience  _ and _ authority.”

 

Dib raised his head and glared, about to complain once again that Zim didn't get to order him around, when the ruby-eyed ex-invader cupped his cheek tenderly.

 

“And because I’m your friend and I need you as much as you need me.”

 

Dib’s previous anger deflated at once. He laid back down against Zim, resting his cheek against the uniformed chest. “Ok… then try it. Tell me it’s ok, Zim, and that I’m not just doing something that’s wrong and naughty… and sick.”

 

“In Irken society, once someone’s gone through their first puberty, it’s ok to enjoy having your antennae touched, or touching them yourself, and giving your body release. It’s even considered healthy.”

 

“Huh… and what about… um…” He blushed as he spoke, but now he was curious and really wanted to know. “What about touching yourself…  _ down there.” _ He pointed towards his crotch, hoping that would make it clear enough what he meant.

 

“All forms of self-pleasure are allowed.”

 

“And what about things like… doing it together?”

 

“After the first puberty, an individual is considered of consenting age.”

 

“That seems kind of young. I mean, I was only like thirteen or fourteen.”

 

“We’re usually between three and five years old by that point.”

 

Dib gasped.  _ “THREE AND FIVE???” _

 

_ “ Irk _ years, Dib. That’s thirty to fifty of the  _ Earth’s.” _

 

“Oh!”

 

“And the second puberty usually comes about a year or two after the first, depending if the individual is a fast or slow ‘bloomer’ as you call it here on Earth. -  _ Irk _ years, again.”

 

“Oh.” Dib considered this information a bit. “And, uh, what kind were you, if it’s ok?”

 

“Slow, but Tartlings usually are. I was over four-and-a-half for the first, and almost six for my second.”

 

Dib thought about that too, and he’d be lying if he said he didn't find it interesting. “Tartlings, huh… And is that why you were shorter than the other Irkens? I think you even said  _ the _ shortest...”

 

Zim shrugged and sighed. “I think that was just me… Although…” he began thoughtfully, his tone somewhat brighter than before.  _ “Scoodge _ was very short too.”

 

“Scoodge?” Dub asked, having never heard that name before.

 

“OHH!” Zim waved his hand dismissively. “Just some GUY I was in  _ smeet training _ with!”

 

“Um… but not your boyfriend, right?”

 

“Dib,” Zim’s tone was warning and left no uncertain terms. “No, he wasn't! And you will  _ DROP _ it, little smeet!”

 

“Ok, ok!” Dib cried, raising his hands in surrender. “I just asked, but I won't ask anything else about your boyfriend!”

 

Zim wrapped his arms around and squeezed him. “That’s a good Dib-smeet,” he purred and rested his chin gently on Dib’s head. “Anyway, the point I’m trying to make here is that it’s  _ OKAY _ for you to enjoy sexual release, with or without my help. It’s  _ OKAY _ if you mess your underwear, and  _ OKAY _ if you mess them  _ all. _ They can be  _ cleaned.” _

 

Dib closed his eyes and  _ tried _ to take the words to heart, but it was so hard to do so, to break down all the concepts he'd lived with all his life. “I just feel like  _ everything _ I do is wrong, Zim.” He blew out a sigh.

 

“Do… hyooman  _ parents _ tell their children that?”

 

Dib actually couldn't remember who’d first told him that. He hadn't really discussed sexuality with his father  _ ever, _ so it could only have come from the skill.

 

“It’s pretty common, yeah. I couldn't say about my dad, though. If that’s even what I should call him anymore, since I’m just his  _ clone _ and not his real son. I've never figured that out.”

 

“Hmm…” Zim squeezed him. “Whatever you want is probably fine.” Then he kissed Dib’s head softly. “And there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, my little smeet. There is nothing wrong with enjoying it when I touch your antennae. - Trust me.”

 

Dib doubted it’d be as easy as his ruby-eyed companion claimed it was, but he decided he would try. At least a little. It felt good to hear Zim say it.

 

He exhaled a breath slowly as he settled back against his companion, all of a sudden he felt completely worn out and couldn't keep his eyelids open anymore.

 

“Rest well, my Sweetling,” Zim whispered.

  
  
  


***

  
  
  


When Dib had awakened and they got up, they inspected his knees to find they had completely healed in the few hours he’d slept and he was thrilled.

 

“Ok, maybe Irken DNA is pretty cool.”

 

“Yes, yes, it is. Much better than your inferior hyooman DNA!” Zim grinned proudly as he retrieved clothing from his bag. 

 

He laid pants and gloves out on the bed and Dib, only in the Irken underwear, picked up the pants, holding them up to himself. They seemed impossibly small, not to mention too small for Zim as well.

 

“I don't see how they’d fit either of us and, no offense, but I’m a lot taller than you.”

 

“Well, just try them on,” Zim replied, now giving them a critical look as well.

 

Dib nodded and bent down so he could step into them, then he pulled them up all the way, up to his hips and adjusted them.

 

“Huh,” he murmured as he looked down at them, finding they covered his entire legs for no reason he could fathom. “This isn't like any material I’ve ever seen. - And they're very...” He couldn't think of how to describe the form-fitting pants.

 

Zim smiled as he looked. “Mm, but they do look very nice on you.” He licked his lips.

 

Dib blushed. “When you look at me like that, I feel more naked in these than I was before.”

 

Zim chuckled and shook his head. “Don't be silly. They just fit properly. - How do you like them?”

 

“I don't know… I guess they're comfortable enough, but they're gonna take some getting used to.”

 

Zim smiled. “They don't rip as fast as yours do, so if you fall again, you’ll be protected.”

 

“That’s a good argument, I guess.”

 

Zim picked up a glove and held it up. “Now hold out your hand.”

 

Dib blinked, but did so even though he was sure he could've handled putting on gloves by himself.

 

Zim held it by the hem and guided it over Dib’s hand, pulling it up his forearm, while being careful that his fingers slipped in properly, and stopped at his elbows.

 

Dib opened and closed his hand a few times, testing the fit, and smiled. “I see why you like to wear these all the time. They are really comfortable and you hardly notice them.”

 

Zim beamed. “And they look good on you as well as offering some protection. - Are you sure you don't want to try on the shirt too?”

 

Dib looked at Zim’s uniform shirt. “I  _ really _ don't think that’s my colour…”

 

Zim shrugged and waved his hand dismissively. “Then another time.” He helped Dib into the second glove, then fetched his own and pulled them on as well before turning back and looking at Dib’s bare feet. “Did you want socks and boots too?”

 

Dib picked up his socks and sat down on the bed, then looked at his own feet, flexing and splaying his two toes. He inspected his socks next, seeing that the claws on the ends of his toes had made short work of them, so he nodded. “Yeah, I guess so.”

 

Zim pulled out a pair of black socks and gave them to him, then Dib pulled one on and sighed, shaking his head.

 

“Don’t like them?” Zim asked, stepping forward to look.

 

“It’s not that,” Dib said softly. He looked over at his boots and coat, then shook his head again, his eyes felt heavy. “Zim, I…” He paused and rubbed them, then shook his head, trying to clear it.

 

Zim touched his cheek. “What’s wrong?”

 

Dib shrugged. “I-I don't know… I mean, we should, right? We have plans and I want to.” Now if only he could convince himself he didn't feel drained already just from getting half-dressed.

 

Zim reached under his chin and raised his head, looking him over carefully. He brushed back Dib’s antennae. “Actually you don't look like you’re up to going. Do you just want to stay?”

 

Dib shook his head. He’d been looking forward to it damnit! He reached up and rubbed his eyes again. “I know you’ve been looking forward to it and I don't want to ruin everything again.”

 

Zim released him. “Nonsense, little smeet!” His gaze dropped to the comforter and he picked it up in one hand, then wrapped it around Dib, turning him into an amber-eyed, green and blue burrito and picked him up. He got up on the bed and cuddled Dib in his lap. “Rest some more.”

  
  
  


***


	23. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, FINALLY another chapter! I'm so lucky you guys are so patient with me. Been so busy with NaNoWriMo, but that's good, because I'm going to win it and you guys will have more chapters to read. Plus, the sequel eventually.

#  Chapter 21

  
  


When Dib awakened the next morning, it was to find Zim smiling down at him.

 

“Good morning, Birthday Boy,” he purred, then bent down and kissed his lips tenderly. “I have selected treats I know you enjoy-”

 

Groggy with sleep still, Dib groaned when the lips left his, then reached around Zim’s neck and pulled him back in for more kisses.

 

“Mm, ok,” Zim murmured, somewhat muffled, against Dib’s lips and he obliged with more kisses. Soft and feathery light at first, then pressing more firmly and parting his lips so he could draw his tongue over Dib’s lips. He caressed the amber-eyed Irken’s cheek whilst. As though reacting on command, Dib parted his mouth to give Zim access to it, his fingers playing at the back of Zim’s neck whilst. He gasped through his nose as he received Zim’s long tongue and felt it curl around his.

 

Supporting himself on one elbow whilst, Zim got more comfortable, stretching out his legs on the bed, his upper body bent over Dib’s and their chests touching. As Dib withdrew his arm from Zim’s neck, the ruby-eyed Irken moved his hand to it and gently rubbed his palm against Dib’s. He curled his fingers in to tease between them suggestively and Dib squirmed a little beneath him, sighing into the kiss as his fingers twitched at the touch, but he didn't move his hand, instead preferring to let Zim lead.

 

Zim then closed his hand, entwining their fingers and pulling it up next to Dib’s head, then pressed it down into the pillow all while kissing Dib and exploring deeper into his mouth, stroking his serpentine tongue intimately along Dib’s and the Sweetling panted through his nose, squirming more against Zim so that their chests brushed against each other, while opening his mouth further to give his companion better access. An unbidden moan left him as Zim’s tongue slid yet farther into his mouth.

 

He suddenly wished Zim would touch him and squirmed again, idly rocking his hips as though trying to either draw attention or rub himself against the covers. He would've raised his other hand, but it was securely pinned at his side between them and Zim moaned into his mouth, kissing passionately. He tightened his grip on Dib’s hand and slipped the other under Dib’s neck, still using his elbow to support himself.

 

Dib moaned this time and arched again, but none of his efforts seemed to be able to draw his companion’s attention to the parts of him that had started tingling. He idly attempted to pull his hand away from Zim’s, so he could at least touch the ruby-eyed Irken, but Zim was stronger and not allowing it, so Dib gave up.

 

All too soon, Zim withdrew his tongue and, brushing it over his lips once, ended the kiss and smiled down at Dib.

 

“Happy Birthday, Dib,” he purred in a husky whisper and released Dib’s hand finally so he could brush his companion’s twitching antennae back and smiled down at him.

 

Dib looked up at him, blushing as he realized his body was giving Zim a half-salute. “Th-thanks,” he whispered hoarsely, looking up at his companion's with wide, awaiting eyes and wondered what he should do next. Would it be wrong to try and kiss Zim again? He reached up behind Zim’s head and attempted to pull him down again, but Zim resisted, smiling down at him.

 

“Mmm, having cravings for Zim’s kisses this morning, are you?” He brushed his thumb over Dib’s lips.

 

At the question, Dib snapped out of it and blushed, suddenly unsure and confused with himself. He closed his eyes, now just wishing he could hide. Then he felt his companion’s lips replace his thumb and brush against his again, tender and warm, slightly wet from earlier still, and parted them to tease Dib’s lower lip between them. Dib’s eyes closed again and he gratefully enjoyed the kiss for however long it lasted.

 

All too soon, Zim withdrew again. “Come, breakfast is getting cold.” Dib opened his eyes, unable to help the disappointed look he knew had spread across his face and  Zim chuckled softly. “Aw, well you can have more later, after you’re fed.” He placed his hand on Dib’s flat tummy and rubbed gently. “Now, come on, sit up. I have a surprise for you today, but you have to be fit.” He raised himself to a sitting position and held his hand out for Dib, pulling him up when Dib took it. He then got up and slipped off the bed.

 

Sighing and resigning himself to the thought of eating breakfast, Dib scooted back against the headboard, adjusting pillows so he could get more comfortable, then Zim shortly returned with a silver tray, decked out with various food items and two hot chocolates, which he set in Dib’s lap, then joined him in bed, settling by his side.

 

Dib picked up one of the chocolates and sipped the hot liquid. Not as nice as Zim’s kisses, but still comforting, he decided as his mind started to clear and hunger began making itself known.

 

“I hope you like the selection,” Zim said, gesturing to the food with a wave of his hand. “I picked stuff I know you enjoy.”

 

“It’s great, Zim, thanks.” Dib picked up a chocolate chip muffin and tore off a piece.

 

Zim picked up one as well and the two commenced with their breakfast.

  
  


***

  
  


Once they'd finished their sweet breakfast and Dib was fully awake, he didn't ask to resume their session of making out from before. Not that the scene hadn't replayed in his mind, but remembering the kinds of urges he'd had brought a blush to his face. Instead, he glanced across the room at his companion and caught himself wondering if it would really be such a terrible thing after all as he watched Zim place the tray back on the food cart. He then pushed the thoughts aside along with the covers and crawled out of bed.

 

Zim turned and faced him. “I left the cleansing chalk in the bathroom when I was done this morning,” he informed Dib as he closed the distance between them, until he was standing before him, looking up at the taller Irken.

 

“Thanks,” Dib murmured.

 

“And I’ve given our dirty laundry to the hotel to clean. It’s a service they offer.”

 

“How early were you up?”

 

“Very early. I require less sleep than you do; remember, my Sweetling?” Zim caressed Dib’s cheek affectionately, then patted it. “Now, go get ready. As soon as they bring it, we can leave.”

 

Dib nodded and turned towards the bathroom. “It just sucks I can't take a shower… or a bath…”  _ ‘...with you,’ _   was the unbidden thought that came to his mind and caused his cheeks to get even hotter than they already were, so he quickly looked away to hide his blush lest his companion notice.

 

“If the water would truly be pure and free of chemicals and whatever else hyoomans dump into it, you could.”

 

Dib simply nodded and went into the bathroom, closing the door behind himself so he could strip. First thing, however, was that PAK, and he reached up behind him to try and find the spot to push and detach it safely. That took a bit of fumbling, especially since he was always nervous about it, but he managed and gave an involuntary shudder when the life clock popped up in his mind's’ eye. It didn't count down yet, but he still hated it, knowing that when it did, it would literally be counting down to his death.

 

He set his PAK down beside the sink and quickly removed his shirt, then turned his back to it so it could reattach, flinching when it fastened back to his spine, then  removed his pants and underwear, took care of nature’s call and picked up the cleansing chalk to clean himself with it.

 

When finished, he cocked his head at his clothing, decided he wanted fresh ones, and grabbed a towel and pulled it around his waist, securing it by tucking it in, then opened the door.

 

“Zim… do you, uh, maybe have some fresh clothes I could wear?”

 

The ruby-eyed Irken suddenly stepped into his line of sight, holding a stack of clothes and grinning proudly. “Of course, my Sweetling.” He held them out for Dib, who took them gratefully.

 

“Thanks.” He returned to the bathroom and closed the door again, then began getting dressed, first the Irken underwear, then the uniform pants. “Oh, um, Zim?” he called out from inside. “Did you… want me to try on the uniform shirt too?” Then, picking up the other shirt Zim had provided, but not putting it on, he opened the door again and came out.

 

Zim was beaming and nodded enthusiastically. “If you’re sure you want to.”

 

Dib nodded. “I promised, didn't I?”

 

Zim didn't need further prodding and went right for his bag, quickly procuring one of his uniform shirts and brought it over to Dib with a notable spring in his step, so Dib reached up behind his PAK and carefully removed it yet again as Zim stepped up behind him to catch it and trade shirts with Dib.

 

The amber-eyed Irken sceptically held it up against himself, trying to decide how to put it on as the collar looked far too small to fit over his head, but he didn't see any way to open it. There was nothing like a zipper or even Velcro to be found. “You might need to help me with this thing,” he said, feeling silly as he turned it around in his hands. _'And_ before _that clock counts down,'_ he thought worredly.

 

Setting the PAK down on the bed, Zim took the shirt from him and looked up. His PAK legs extended and he raised himself up so he could reach over his companion’s head. Holding the bottom of the hem, he slipped it over Dib’s head and the collar stretched to accommodate. Dib slipped his arms into the sleeves and Zim pulled it down over hips like he always wore his.

 

“On moment,” Zim said and lowered himself back to the floor, then walked around behind Dib, adjusting the back over the amber-eyed Irken’s bottom, causing yet another blush when Dib felt his companion’s fingers brushed against his butt. Zim returned and looked him up and down.

 

“How ridiculous do I look?” Dib reached up to pull at the triangular puffs at his shoulders.

 

Zim’s gaze fell to his naked feet. “You still need socks and boots.” Then he took Dib’s hands in his and held them up. “And gloves to complete the uniform.”

 

Nodding, Dib went over to where his socks and boots had been discarded the night before and sat down with them on the bed. He pulled the Irken socks on and splayed his toes, wiggling them to see if they’d really hold up against his sharp claws. Once satisfied they would, he pulled his boots on and stood up again. After that, Zim handed him a pair of gloves and he put them on as well, then he stood up and flexed his hands a few times. He really liked the gloves.

  
“How do I look?” He blushed self-consciously, shutting his eyes as he was afraid of how his companion would react, certain he must look like an idiot.   


  
Zim stepped up to him and ran his hands from Dib’s shoulders down to his gloved hands and took hold of them. “Yes, this pleases Zim,” he purred.   


  
Dib opened one eye and peaked down at him. “Really?”   


  
Zim nodded. “But go have a look for yourself.” He gestured over to the vanity mirror.   


  
Dib opened his other eye and walked up to it. He winced at his reflection, both because it was still so hard to get used to the Irken staring back at him, and because those light pink shoulders just looked so silly to him.   


  
“I look stupid,” he grumbled when Zim’s reflection appeared beside his.   
  


“Nonsense! The pink suits your  _ superior _ green Irken skin, my Sweetling, and this still pleases Zim greatly!”

 

Dib glanced to his companion with a small, shy smile. “Ok, but… is it ok if I just wear one of mine today?”

 

Zim’s reflection stuck out his tongue, then lidded his eyes half way, turning his nose up. “Zim will allow this, just this  _ one _ time.”

 

Dib turned and glared down at his companion. He said nothing, however, and turned to go fetch his preferred shirt.

 

As he picked it up, he turned back to Zim. “Um… if you really like it on me, I could wear it for you again some day, when we’re  _ not _ going out.”

 

Zim grinned and walked up to Dib. He reached up behind his head and pulled him down so he could give him a kiss. “Thank you, Dib. That would please Zim very much.”

  
  
He pulled his shirt on and then, finally, that PAK, which Zim brought over and held up while it reattached to his spine. Dib let out an audible sigh of relief when the life clock disappeared from his mind's eye.

 

***

  
  


When Dib crawled into the Voot Cruiser beside Zim for the first time in over a week, he was grateful. So grateful, even, that he didn't mind the original cramped conditions before Zim commanded the computer to give Dib leg room.

 

As Zim started the engines and turned on the safety fields, Dib could hardly contain his excitement, for this alone made it real. He really was leaving the hotel with Zim finally!  He turned and smiled at his companion. “So, on to Area 51?”

 

“No, Dib,” Zim murmured as he piloted it out of the parking lot. “Zim has  _ special and AMAZING plans _ for you for your day of birth.” He turned to to the amber-eyed Irken. “Afraid yet?”

 

Dib froze as he looked at his friend, feeling a chill run up his spine. “Well, I wasn't until now…”

 

Zim’s wicked grin widened. “Oh, such EVIL things I have in store for you today!” He threw his head back and roared with his trademark evil laughter.

 

Suddenly feeling frustrated with the ex-invader, Dib punched him in the shoulder. “Oh, would you just knock that off, Zim!”

 

“Hey! Dare you abuse ZIM!?”

 

“If you're going to try and  _ scare _ me,” Dib grumbled.

 

Zim reached out and touched his cheek. “Aw, it’ll be scary-good. - Just wait until we get there,” Zim replied in a gentler tone of voice, then placed his hand back on the controls. Sighing, Dib decided to let it go and leaned against his companion and Zim laid his head against Dib’s. “By the way, what would you like to do for dinner this evening?”

 

“Dinner?” Dib enquired without raising his head.

 

“Your  _ birthday _ dinner,” Zim clarified. "I will not have my Sweetling starve the day he is no longer a smeet!" 

 

Dib shrugged. “I don't know…” He really didn't. He hadn't even given it a second thought, with his mind filled with everything else it had to work through.

 

“I… I wanted to take you to a fancy restaurant, but…” Zim’s tone was a mixture of apologetic and sheepish. “You need to make advance reservations for those.”

 

Now Dib did raise his head to look at his companion. “You wanted to take me to an expensive restaurant?”

 

“Yes. I’m sorry I couldn't. I didn't know.”

 

“That’s ok,” Dib replied, reaching up to rub the back of his neck self-consciously. “I-I don't really… I don't think I’d want to go to one.” He shrugged again as he thought about it. “Besides, I doubt we’d find stuff we can actually eat anyway, except salads and desserts and it’d look really weird for two people to just order those...” And he just really didn't want to go to some fancy, snooty restaurant that cost way more than it was likely worth. Unless someone found Bigfoot in their kitchen or ghosts in their meat locker. Or aliens... _other_ than he and Zim.

 

Zim turned to him. “So… this is not bad that Zim has not been successful in his mission?”

 

Dib blinked, suddenly overcome with the desire to reassure Zim. “Y-yes! It’s ok, Zim! Uh…” He paused to think for a moment, remembering how the ex-invader had kept asking him what he'd like to do. “You know… if we could just… buy some snacks and food we can eat and find a place outside… like where no one else can see us, I-I’d really like that. Maybe we can even camp out overnight. I-I’d like that better, actually.” He'd also like to not be cooped up in a hotel room again. Fresh air sounded like a piece of paradise.

 

“Camp out?” Zim repeated, though Dib couldn't tell whether his tone was confused or thoughtful.

 

Dib then sighed as he thought of something. “We-we’d have to buy sleeping bags and camping gear though, so I guess that’s a dumb idea. Never mind.”

 

Zim tapped the controls to turn on the auto-pilot, then turned to him. He reached under Dib’s chin and turned the amber-eyed Irken’s head toward him. “If you want a picnic and camping after spending a week in a hotel as my captive little Sweetling experiment, then it is a picnic and camping that you will have, my Dib.”

 

Dib smiled a little. “But I don't want you to have to buy all the supplies…”

 

“Oh, you poor, poor, naïve little Dib-Sweetling,” Zim teased, his tone airy and he clicked his tongue. “You will go camping with Zim  _ Invader-style!” _

 

“What’s… that?” He couldn't keep the apprehension out of his tone.

 

“Trust Zim and you shall be truly _amazed,_ for I have everything right here in my ship except for the food for your day of birth.”  Dib considered this, wondering what sort of camping supplies an Irken Invader would carry. “And maybe," Zim went on. "if I do well and please the Dib, you will reward Zim with a kiss?” Dib blinked, blushing a little as he cocked his head at his companion. Zim was clearly trying to look cute and inviting and, feeling invited, Dib wrapped his arms around Zim’s neck and gave him a quick peck on his cheek. “Mmm…” Zim purred, leaning into the kiss.

 

Dib laid his head against his companion’s shoulder and inhaled his scent deeply; in his arms, he felt Zim do the same. “It’s nice to be back on the road with you again,” he murmured, feeling content and even happy.

 

Zim reached up and caressed Dib’s opposite cheek, pressing him gently to him. “Good. - And I think you will enjoy the surprise Zim has for you.”

 

“What is it?”

 

“It is… a SURPRISEY surprise! - You will just have to wait. Zim’s lips are sealed.”

 

“Hm. Well, if Zim says so...” Dib murmured, deciding then to let it go and just enjoy that they were out of the hotel finally.

 

"Zim does."

 

Dib settled further against his companion with a happy sigh and watched out the window idly as they flew on. It was then that it occurred to him how he normally would have just dozed off by now, before Zim had fixed his DNA. For that gift, Dib was overcome with gratitude. “Thanks, Zim,” he said, voice thick with emotion.

 

“But you haven't seen Zim’s surprise yet.”

 

“Huh? Oh, no, I… didn't mean that, I meant for what you did for my DNA.” Then he suddenly raised his head as a thought occurred to him. “Th-this means I-I won't have to go back to the institution! …Right? I mean, they couldn't do anything for me anyway and now… Well, now they don't have to.  _ Right?” _

 

Zim looked up at him, then smiled tenderly. “That’s right, Dib. ZiM's amazing brainmeats are superior to the stinkbeasts of Earth!”

 

Instead of rolling his eyes, Dib just looked at him full of emotion. “And I thank you so much for that, Zim.”

  
  


***

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally a little bit of almost-gratifying ZaDR, no?
> 
> Now, first, have to say, I KNOW Dib is a clone in my story, so there was no proper "day of birth" as we know it, but Dib hadn't known that until a few years ago, and Zim hardly cares about such silly details when he's trying to please his Sweetling anyway.
> 
> Shoot, and there was something else I wanted to mention, but I completely forgot what it was... oh well, maybe I'll remember later.


	24. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, first off: I DID IT! I won NaNo 2018!! 50k words in 30 days! (Actually, I hit 50k on the 27th.)
> 
> Unfortunately, I have NOT finished 'Roadtrip' yet, LOL! But, considering I had to start the sequel BEFORE I had finished (because November and NaNoWriMo came faster than I could write), I'm not surprised. I do still have a number of chapters written, they just need editing. Really, really bad. It might be a while before you get the next one, just a warning.

#  Chapter 22

 

When Zim removed the blindfold he had insisted Dib wear, and the amber-eyed Irken saw the unique looking bridge, he could hardly contain his excitement. “ZIM!” he exclaimed in delight. “This is the  _ Skydance Bridge of Oklahoma City!” _

 

“Yes, you wanted to-”

 

“COME HERE!” Dib unintentionally finished his companion’s sentence in his enthusiasm and grabbed a gloved hand, he burst into a sprint, towing Zim along after him and the ruby-eyed Irken had to scramble to not be yanked right off his feet.

 

“ZIM NEEDS THAT ARM!”

 

Dib lead him straight up to the bridge, giving little regard for the other people there as he hurriedly pushed his way closer, only stopping when they were standing right before it. Then Dib spread his hands out in a sweeping gesture towards the bridge structure.

 

“So... that's  _ totally _ an alien construction, right?” Dib asked, a huge, expectant grin on his face. “Which aliens make stuff like this?”

 

Rubbing his shoulder once he was back in sole possession of it, Zim narrowed his eyes, giving the bridge a disgusted look. “Dib, we already went over how there were NO alien things on the Earth before Zim.”

 

“Oh, come  _ on!” _ Dib cried, turning to him. “That  _ can't _ be man-made! No one on Earth would design such a ridiculous thing! I mean, just  _ look _ at it!”

 

“No, Dib.”

 

Dib blinked, his shoulders slumping for a moment, then he thought of something. “Well… would you just give it a closer look?  _ Please, _ Zim!”

 

“I’m telling you, we’re not going to find anything but yet  _ another _ prime example of stupid hyooman tastelessness.”

 

“Please, Zim,” Dib plead again and took Zim’s hand in his, holding it to his chest and fixing Zim with his best puppy look. “Just humour me a little and have a closer look! Just for  _ me?” _

 

“Well…”

 

_ “Pleeeeeaase!” _

 

Zim blew out a long sigh, then turned on a pleased smirk. “Oh, you know I just can't say ‘no’ when you  _ beg.” _

 

“So, does that mean..?”

 

_ “Yessss, _ Zim will take a closer look at your  _ hideous… _ bridgey… thingy! - Why do you think Zim brought you here, anyway?” he added with a wink.

 

With that, the ex-invader closed his hand around Dib’s and lead him to the base of the bridge. Glancing around at the other people, Zim discreetly slipped a pair of goggles from his PAK and put them on. He bent over the side to have a closer look at one of the leg-like structures and made a few adjustments to the goggles.

 

“I’m afraid I’m just not seeing anything but perfectly normal hyooman materials.”

 

Dib bent over and looked too. Of course, it looked as unremarkable as Zim said, except for its odd shape, but he just  _ knew _ it had to be alien. It HAD to. His sanity depended on it.

 

Zim stepped back and turned to look at him, shaking his head. “I’m sorry.”

 

Dib sighed as disappointment washed over him and his heart sunk. Worse, he now felt stupid, like he'd just made a fool of both himself and Zim. “N-nevermind… I-I shouldn't have bothered you with… my delusions.”

 

Goggles still on, Zim narrowed his eyes at him. “Zim will have  _ none _ of that from you, little smeet!” he barked, then added in a softer tone, “I will… just look further…”

 

He adjusted the goggles and scanned the structure from top to bottom and side to side. He began to shake his head as he paced forward along the length to the ‘head’, looking at the underside.

 

Suddenly, he paused. “Hold on…” Zim murmured, zooming in closer on a point near the front.

 

Dib looked too, but had trouble making out anything, so he looked to Zim expectantly, curious what the ex-invader would have to say.

 

Zim, however, pushed his goggles up on his forehead. “I’m going to need a closer look.” He looked around, glaring at a couple that was strolling their way, then took Dib by the arm and lead him off the bridge to the pilon that was supporting the ‘head’, ducking out of view behind it.

 

“Zim?”

 

“You stay put,” he commanded, pointing to the spot Dib was squatting. Then he straightened up and gave another glance around to make sure they couldn't be seen before he activated a display on his right glove and fingered in a few commands, then, when the display disappeared again, he  looked intently up at the structure and his PAK legs extended, raising him swiftly up to the top of the pilon where he crawled onto it and disappeared, spider-legs and all, from Dib’s view and remained hidden for a few long minutes.

 

Meanwhile, Dib quickly took another anxious look around to see if anyone might have seen his companion, but there was no one in sight. He hoped Zim would hurry and bit his lip nervously, then the spider-legs suddenly dropped down beside him and Zim followed a second after, landing on his feet.

 

The ex-invader looked more than a little baffled. “It would seem the hyoomans have merely covered something up, because, where some of their pitiful cement and glue have worn away, there is a material inside that is not found on this planet… or even in this  _ solar system.” _ It took Dib a while for Zim’s words to register and he stared down at him dumbly; upon seeing that, Zim cocked his head. “That means, your suspicions are right, Dib-thing,” he clarified.

 

Dib still couldn't believe his ears. “Th-they are?”

 

“Yes. It is  _ not _ hyooman-made. Not entirely, anyway.”

 

It took Dib a few more beats, then he broke out in a relieved smile and threw his arms around Zim’s shoulders, squeezing him tight. He buried his face in his companion's neck and whimpered as the sting of grateful tears burned behind his eyes “I-I’m not just insane??”

 

“Of  _ course _ not!” Zim rolled his eyes and slowly returned the embrace.

 

“Thank you! Thank you so much!” Sniffling, Dib drew back to wipe his eyes and swallowed again, slowly regaining control of himself. “Sorry, I-I’m acting like a crazy person… - Anyway, what… what is it? Where did it come from? Is it Irken?”

 

Zim shook his head. “I have no idea what it is. I’ve never seen anything like this before, though something about it seems familiar…” He scratched his head just under the edge of his wig, then shrugged. “I just can't quite pin it down.”

 

Dib looked up at it again, trying to decide if it looked like anything he could imagine being useful and practical in outer space. “Maybe it’s some kind of radio antenna?”

 

Zim raised his hands helplessly. “I really have no idea, Dib. - When we get back to the Cruiser, I’ll have my computer analyze what I’ve found.”

 

Hearing that, Dib could hardly wait to get back to the little ship and grabbed Zim’s arm, tugging him back the way they had come. “Then let's go!” But this time, Zim would not be budged.

 

“One moment…” Zim activated the display in his right glove again and tapped in another set of commands, then it disappeared and he turned back to Dib. “Ok. - Shall we then, my Sweetling?”

 

“Yeah,” Dib affirmed and, as they made their way back across the bridge, fell into step with the ruby-eyed Irken. “By the way, what’d you do back there? With your glove?”

 

Zim looked up at him and raised his hands, giving his gloves a quizzical look. “My glove?”

 

Watching him from the corner of his eye, Dib nodded. “Yeah, you had a computer screen in your right one.”

 

Zim looked at his glove for a moment. “Oh, yes,  _ that! _ \- I was just reactivating the cameras in the area after, um, knocking them all out so they wouldn't catch me using my PAK-legs.”

 

“Oh, that’s a good ide-” Dib blinked and halted in his tracks, quickly grabbing Zim by the arm to stop him too. “I didn't know you could do that! How come you never just did that before when I  was trying to _expose_ you? It would've saved us  _ both _ a lot of hassle, you know! - Not to mention, my cameras… _ ” _ And he certainly had never quite gotten over that time when Zim pulled a  _ ‘Fantastic Voyage (of DOOM)’ _ stint on him to, quite literally,  _ make _ him forget where he’d hidden a backup copy of some indisputable evidence either... and the little green lizard had  _ succeeded _ via a joyride in Dib’s guts.  _ “- And my dignity…” _ he finished with a hiss.

 

Zim looked up, then smiled sheepishly. “Oh, well… I-I did learn  _ something _ after all those years of you trying - and even succeeding once or twice - to catch an… under-dressed Zim on camera.”

 

“Oh…” Dib blinked, then blushed a little, though he had no idea why. “Really?”

 

Zim took Dib’s arm and resumed walking. “An Invader  _ learns _ from their mistakes, my Dib, however  _ rare _ they may be.”

 

Again Dib fell in step with his companion. “I never thought I’d ever hear  _ you _ admit you make mistakes.”

 

“However  _ rare _ they may be,” Zim reiterated.

 

Dib gave him a playful shove and they continued on their way, shortly Dib's thoughts returned to their finding and he began fantasising about all the things the bridge they’d just inspected could be; he was so eager that, once they were settled in the Voot Cruiser, he turned to Zim in excited expectation.

 

“Computer,” the ex-invader announced as a cable extended from his PAK to attach to a spot on the console. “Analyse the Skydance Bridge data I have retrieved! Search for possible matches in the database!”

 

_ “Analyzing initiated.” _

 

The cable retreated and Zim started the engines, then he activated the safety field and turned to Dib. “How about lunch?”

 

Dib nodded in agreement, knowing he probably had to be patient if it was going to find a match in the, he didn't know how many alien species there were out there.

  
  


***

  
  


Zim stopped in front of a vegetarian restaurant, having decided that would be their best choice for Dib’s birthday dinner. Pictures of burgers, various salads, sandwiches, pizza, and smoothies were displayed on the outside.

 

“I was actually planning to surprise you, but do you actually want me to fetch anything in particular?”

 

“Hmm, we can't have cheese, right?” Dib asked as he realized he was hungry for pizza. Even if it was only a cheese or vegetarian one.

 

“I don't like cheese, but you can have it if you must,” the ex-invader replied, looking even greener, if that was possible. The tip of his tongue hung out of his mouth as he glared in disgust at the picture of pizza. “And eat it as far away from me as possible.”

 

Watching him, Dib pursed his eyebrows. “I… guess you hate pizza, huh?”

 

Zim nodded. “Just the smell of cheese makes me sick to my squeedlyspooch. - And I do not want another pim-pole, hypnotic or otherwise.”

 

“You got that from  _ pizza?” _

 

Zim shrugged. “Either that or GIR’s bacon. Either way, I cannot stand either of those filthy, meaty, cheesy… revolting things you and your smelly Earth-monkeys call food!”

 

At that, Dib changed his mind about the pizza, not wanting to torment his friend just because he had a sudden craving for it. “Well, you just fetch whatever you want…” He smiled a little at his companion. “...And surprise me.” Zim met his eyes and, with a pleased smile, saluted him.

 

When Zim returned carrying a couple bags which he stowed in the trunk so Dib didn't have a chance to see, they left to find a suitable and secluded spot where they could camp for the night.

  
  


***

“‘Area 51 Marina, Lake Eufaula, Oklahoma’,” Dib read the sign aloud as they turned off the main road. _“'Area 51'?_ Zim, I meant in  _ Nevada.” _ He turned to his companion and the ex-invader said nothing, though had a pleased grin on his face as he piloted the Cruiser. “Zim, not  _ Oklahoma,” _ he added, finding Zim's smile to be annoyingly unhelpful.

“Oh, don't be silly. This  _ aptly-named _ ‘Mary-NAH’ will be our quarters for the night only.”

“Oh! -  _ Ohhh…” _ Dib shot the ex-invader an ‘I see what you did there’ look. “This is your attempt at being  _ humorous.” _ Saying nothing to that, Zim merely giggled, so Dib prodded further. “Two aliens camping in Area 51, that’s  _ very _ witty, Zim.” Again the ruby-eyed Irken only giggled, while Dib shook his head.

Soon they pulled into a parking lot near a restaurant and Zim turned to Dib. “Let's go in and see if they have any good maps of this… _peculiar_ place for camping and outdoor recreation.”

Dib nodded and followed Zim out, adjusting his wig carefully once his feet were on solid ground, then they made their way to the boardwalk. Stepping into it, both hesitated, shuddering, as they glanced at the lake. With a gulp, Zim took hold of Dib’s hand and slowly, warily guided him on to it, watching each carefully placed step as though afraid it would sink at any moment. It wasn't long before both had kicked it into a full sprint and raced down the dock.

Both were relieved when they found the entrance, they opened the door and slipped quickly inside, closing it behind them with a heavy exhale before letting go of each other’s hand.

They looked around at the other people there, a few were looking at them and Dib suddenly worried that everyone was staring at the two out-of-breath  _ aliens _ that had just ran in and he instinctively reached up to check that his wig was still on and in place.

“HA! I  _ BEAT _ YOU, FILTHY DIB-WORM!” Zim barked triumphantly and Dib looked at him gaping.

“Beat me?!” Dib cried, concerns about his wig now forgotten, and saw Zim was grinning as proudly as he sounded. “No you  _ didn't! _ What are you even talk-”

Zim stopped him with a look and waved his hand dismissively, then straightened up and marched importantly off toward a display, looking as though he owned the place. Seemingly satisfied, the onlookers turned back to whatever they had been doing, resuming their conversations, so Dib followed after Zim into the belly of the restaurant and gift shop, and looked at the various travel brochures and magazines. He picked a random one up.

Then the Irken marched up to the desk itself. “Hello, hyooman desk drone,” he addressed the clerk and Dib’s head snapped up from the magazine he’d stuck his nose in mainly to hide his embarrassment and catch his breath.

“Zim!” Dib cried and quickly joined his companion.

“Oh, hello, Young Sirs, how may I help you?” said the clerk, a platinum blond man looking to be in his mid-to-late twenties, who was clean cut and generally made a snappy appearance.

Zim put on a sweet smile. “Well, we actually just need to rent a camping place on your grounds for a little while. - For tents.” Dib just looked at the clerk, hoping the man wasn't too terribly insulted. “Somewhere secluded, please, so we aren't disturbed by anyone else,” the ex-invader added and Dib’s mouth fell open, petrified.

The man pulled out a brochure with a map of the grounds and laid it on the table, looking along it, then tapped a spot with his finger. “This area isn't very popular. It does have a great spot for a tent and a nice view of the lake, but the fishing is no good there and you can’t swim in the water. It’s also too cut off from everything, so people rarely go there. - It should be perfect for you two sweethearts to have some alone time.”

“It’s  _ not _ what you think!” Dib blurted out quickly. Entirely too quickly. “He-he’s my…  _ brother!”  _ He pointed to Zim and wished he weren't blushing.

The man smiled. “Of  _ course _ he is.” Then the clerk pointed across the room to a trim, brown-haired waiter with a small goatee. “And Mick’s just  _ my _ brother.” The clerk waved to Mick, blowing a quick kiss, then placed both his hands on the counter, leaning forward conspiratorially. “Look, I could tell the moment you two came running in holding hands. Don’t worry about it. No one here cares about two young men in love.”

“We-we were out of breath because of our  _ race _ ,” Dib explained, not wanting the man to think it was because of anything else, and especially not because they were afraid of the water. Or had been doing something deliciously naughty that they shouldn't.

“Let me tell you a secret,” the clerk said quietly. “The sooner you accept yourself, the happier you’ll be. Don’t try and stay hiding in the closet. It’s not worth it.”

“Though I am not sure what any  _ closets _ have to do with anything,” Zim piped in wearing an expression that clearly said 'finally some hyooman that actually understands'. “I have been trying to tell him the same thing.”

The man smiled. “Well, this spot should be perfect for you two.” He pointed to the place on the map again and circled it with a highlighter.

Zim nodded and took out his wallet. “That will suffice, I believe.”

The clerk accepted the money, then folded up the map and gave it to Zim along with a receipt and parking voucher. “Have fun camping. - And good luck.” He winked at Zim.

“Silly hyooman, Zim needs no  _ luck.” _ He stowed his wallet back in his PAK, then slipped his arm around Dib’s waist and pulled him close, while Dib blushed, but didn't put up much protest.

With a wave from the clerk, Zim lead Dib back outside. The two quickly raced back up the boardwalk and to the Voot Cruiser, only stopping when they’d reached the little spaceship.

Zim pulled out the map and looked once more at the spot the clerk had shown them. “This really could be perfect, Dib, shall we go see it?”

Dib nodded and they crawled into the ship; once Zim had started the engines and given the coordinates and road path into the computer, they were off.

  
  


***

  
  


They stopped when Zim had found a spot he wanted to park the Cruiser and got out.

“Now we just need to pick a spot,” Zim announced and he looked around at all the trees, the sky, then the ground. “Not here. The map says there’s a spot closer to the... _lake.”_ Zim shuddered. “Let's… look around.”

Dib agreed and the two trudged onwards towards the said body of water and shortly found a spot Dib liked; one that was clear of trees so they could sit out under the stars, and far enough away from the lake that no stray droplets of water could reach them, yet they still had a view of it.

“This place?” Zim asked and Dib nodded.

“Yeah, unless you don't like it?” Perhaps it was too close to the water.

“Stop it. It’s fine,” Zim replied and returned to the Cruiser to grab their stuff.

When he returned, they spread out a cloth and Zim set the bags of food items and snacks out on it along with Irken soda pop. Once arranged to his liking, Zim turned to him and took his hands. “Dib, I hope this will be a pleasant birthday dinner for you… To commence your no longer being a little Earth-smeet.”

Dib blushed a little and looked at it: A nice little picnic out under the stars and away from everyone else? No loud parties, no drunk skoolmates, no snooty girls, and no one to make fun of or pick on him? And no stuffy hotel rooms? Just himself and Zim out in the fresh air alone together? He didn't think he could imagine anything more perfect. So, he nodded and, feeling bold, bent down and kissed Zim.

“It’s perfect, Zim,” he whispered after their lips parted. “Thank you.”

“And there’s that kiss, so Zim must have done something right.” Zim beamed and guided him onto the cloth and took a seat across from him, then grabbed the bag, where he took something out and handed it to Dib.

Dib blinked, because it was warm, and he carefully unwrapped it from the napkin to find it was a gooey, chewy, fudgy, and generously-sized... something that reminded him of a dark blue brownie. Despite the colour, it smelled like heaven with a hint of - He sniffed again…  _ ‘oh,’ _ \- “...Is that  _mint?”_ He looked up at Zim and cocked his head. “I’m not sure whether to be more surprised that this thing exists, or that it’s not cold by now. Or did you just buy it when I wasn't looking?” Right, Zim bought a _blue brownie_ on Earth when he wasn't looking. He mentally kicked himself for the dumb question.

“It is Irken, one of my last, and I heated it up just now in the Cruiser.” Then he smiled knowingly at Dib, and added firmly, “and that is  _ not _ mint.”

Dib sniffed again and shrugged. “It smells like it to me…” In fact, he truly couldn't seem to pick up any noticable difference between mint and this.

“Then you will have to clean out your nose,” Zim retorted and his eyes fell on it. “Try it already, would you?”

Dib nodded and took a bite and it tasted as wonderful as it smelled. It was definitely not mint, though. It was definitely a minty  _ flavour, _ but it was not mint as he’d ever had it, in plant or syrup form; instead there were chewy chunks mixed in that almost reminded him of warm raisins, and those seemed to be where the minty flavour originated from. As he chewed one specifically, he could detect an almost woodsy or nutty undertone as well, but definitely mint. He blinked and looked up at his companion.

“Do  _ not _ tell me what this is until I’ve finished,” he said firmly.

“Why’s that?”

“Because I’m enjoying it  _ now, _ but if you tell me those little chewy, round things in here are some _alien eggs_ or… or  _ eyeballs _ or something, I will be sick!”

Zim made a face and stuck out his tongue, shaking his head. “No, no. It’s nothing like that, just… they’re kinda like berries, I guess.” His smile grew warm. “And yes, _that_ is the scent you have correctly identified Zim to have.”

“Oh.” Dib blushed. “And… what about cinnamon? And what’s that other smell?”

Zim shrugged. “I might have something with the ‘cinnamony’ scent, but… not the other.”

Dib wasn't sure, but when Zim said ‘not the other’, he could almost have sworn Zim looked like he was keeping a very juicy secret. Something in his tone and Dib bit the bait. “Ok, and why are you so happy about that? Not having one of them?”

“Oh, it’s because I can't even get  _ that _ item. Not even an  _ Invader _ has clearance for that.” He giggled for absolutely no reason Dib could fathom. “It’s reserved for the Tallest  _ alone.” _ He giggled again.

“And what makes that so great if you can't have it? Or have you secretly swiped some before?” He certainly wouldn't put it past his ex-rival to get whatever he wanted if he decided to, whether the little creep was _supposed_ to have it or not.

Zim smirked proudly. “Because  _ I, _ the  _ amazing ZiM, _ smell like it.” He puffed his chest out and gave a toothy grin.

Dib sighed, then raised his hands in a helpless gesture. “I _still_ don't understand…”

“It’s ok, my Sweetling.” Zim pulled out another snack, this time for himself. "Now, enough talk! Let us commence with the eating of your birthday dinner, my Sweetling!" He made a sweeping wave to indicate the rest of the spread with his hand.

 

Giving their little picnic a quick look-over and considering the effort Zim had clearly gone to in the hopes of making it nice for him, Dib smiled and, with a small nod, took another bite of the alien treat. "Thank you, Zim."

 

"Eat! My little smeet!"

"I thought you said I wasn't a smeet anymore," Dib couldn't help chiding when he'd swallowed.

 

"Eat! My not-a-smeet-anymore Irken-Dib!"

 

As his answer, Dib took another bite and chewed contentedly, smiling to himself over how out-of-this-world his birthday truly had turned out to be: Finding an alien structure on Earth that even Zim hadn't known about; and now camping out in 'Area 51' with an alien, eating alien food; it really couldn't have been better!

 

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this one's obviously for the Oklahoma folks! :-D
> 
> No, I'm not actually from Oklahoma, this is dedicated to a dear friend who lives there and told me all about the "cool" stuff, like that bridge.
> 
> Anyway, the only thing I've specifically made up as far as these specific locations are concerned, is the camping spot they've chosen. I have no idea if there is any part of that lake where fishing is bad. (But it IS true they can't swim in the water, even if the clerk isn't aware of their specific reason.)


	25. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hm, I don't really have anything to say about this. Just hope you continue to enjoy it.
> 
> Oh, and a warning that it gets a little saucy.

#  Chapter 23

  
  


Late that night in the wee hours when they were confident no one would see them, the two had removed their disguises and sat in the soft grass a safe distance from the lake. They were cuddled up side-by-side in each other’s arms, while both looked at the stars.

 

“Irk, Vort, Foodcourtia, Blorch… Hobo 13…” Zim was pointing to the sky as he explained to the amber-eyed Irken each planet's location. Or  _ tried _ to, at least. “Actually, they're all pretty much in that direction, because I’m the first one to be sent out this far.”

 

“Oh,” Dib replied and snuggled up tighter and laid his head on Zim’s shoulder, enjoying the moment and the closeness they were sharing. A perfect ending to a phenomenal birthday. With Zim. “I wish I could see them someday.”

 

“Mm,” Zim murmured, sounding just as content as Dib.

 

Inhaling the scent of his ruby-eyed companion, Dib felt both happier and more content than he had in a long time, maybe even forever, and he turned to his companion. He smiled a little and admired the way Zim sat with his chin tilted up towards the sky, ruby-eyes glittering in the moonlight.

 

He caught himself and looked down at his free hand, then drew his other away from Zim to fidgit as he mulled things over in his head. He suddenly felt nervous and his heart began to pound.

 

“Zim,” he murmured, his voice breathier and shakier than he’d expected or intended and he felt a blush rise to his cheeks.

 

“Dib?” his companion answered, his tone concerned and showing that he had picked up on Dib’s unease.

 

Dib took a deep breath, glancing once to Zim, then away, feeling self-conscious and hardly able to believe what he was about to do. 

 

“I’m ready,” he announced softly, choosing not to waste any more time, instead just get it out there before his increasing nerves made it wholly impossible.

 

“Ready?” Zim repeated and his confused tone revealed he had absolutely no idea what Dib was talking about.

 

“To be Zim’s.” Dib then held his breath, waiting fretfully for his companion’s answer.

 

Zim raised his head, turning it toward him. “To be Zim’s?” He touched Dib’s cheek, urging him to look in his direction.

 

Dib complied and looked up, amber eyes wide and afraid. “Y-yeah,” he affirmed. “I’m ready to be Zim’s. To be yours.”

 

As Zim met his eyes, his expression revealed he had understood what Dib meant. “Are you  _ sure?” _

 

“Yes..?”

 

Zim’s antennae lowered, his expression suspicious. “What makes you think you're ready to be Zim’s?”

 

Dib’s brow pursed and he swallowed the rising disappointment back, trying his best to keep it together, as he desperately tried to think of something,  _ anything, _ he might could use to convince Zim. He looked down at his hands again, realising he simply had nothing, he was literally and figuratively empty-handed, and his antennae drooped. He rubbed his arms and his gaze to the side as he tried to ignore the creeping feeling that he was nothing more than a fool in his companion’s ruby eyes.

 

“Y-you said that if… if I ever changed my mind, I should… tell you… well, I-I did.” He was sure he sounded even more lame than before and swallowed, his cheeks hot with embarrassment.

 

Zim didn't miss a beat. “And  _ what _ has made you change your mind?”

 

Then an answer came to Dib, stupid as it was going to sound to the cybernetic invader, but it was true and, to him, an unbelievably profound realisation. His heart even fluttered with the idea. “Because I… I love you, Zim,” he answered softly, his voice barely above a whisper.

 

Zim took his chin between thumb and forefinger and turned his head back to him, looking into his eyes. “You do?”

 

Dib nodded once. “Yeah... Pretty lame, huh?”

 

Zim cupped his his cheek with the other hand. “If so, then we’re both pretty lame, because I love you  _ too, _ Dib.”

 

Dib’s eyes widened and he turned to fully face his companion. “Y-you do??”

 

“Yeah… Pretty lame, huh?” Zim gave a cute smirk.

 

Dib could hardly believe his ears and gawked at him for a moment, then threw himself against Zim, hugging him tight and the ex-invader hugged him back, caressing the back of his head.

 

When they withdrew, smiling at each other, Zim leaned in and gave him a delighted kiss. Then another and another, then drew back to look at him for a moment.

 

“The Dib is mine!” Zim suddenly threw his head back and pumped his fists. “VICTORY FOR ZIM!”

 

Dib blushed, feeling embarrassed at the other’s unexpected outburst. He never, in all his life, would have thought that someone would be so happy to hear that he loved them. Least of all his former rival.

 

Zim looked back at him and cupped his cheek with one hand, then brushed his antennae back with the other, before pulling him into his lap and cuddling him as he’d done so many times before while Dib had been in The Sweetening.

 

After a while of enjoying this as he tried to grasp the reality, Dib finally broke the silence. “And I want to be Zim’s… in all ways.”

 

“Hmm? What did you say, my Dib-Sweetling?”

 

“Th-that I want to… be Zim’s in every way.” He swallowed, his cheeks heating up from his shy admission.

 

“In every way?” Zim repeated softly.

 

“Yeah, I… I want to…” He gulped, not sure he could make himself actually say it. “You know… try…  _ it.” _

 

“Umm… what  _ ‘it’ _ do you mean now?”

 

Now Dib was blushing so hard with embarrassment. “Oh, you  _ know _ what!”

 

“Actually… now I’m just getting confused.” To be fair, he  _ sounded _ confused too.

 

“Oh, do I really have to  _ say _ it?” Dib whined miserably.

 

“Well, if you  _ want _ something from Zim, then you have to  _ tell _ him. His amazing brainmeats truly are  _ amazing, _ but he is not actually a mind-reader.” He tapped Dib’s head gently. “And I don't want to just make wild guesses and be wrong.”

 

“Oh… I guess that's fair… - You know, like with my antennae, but…  _ make love.” _

 

Zim tilted his head up to look at him, scratching his chin in thought. “I believe that was a hyooman term for mating, right?”

 

Dib swallowed and nodded, unable to find his voice anymore.

 

“You do realize that just because you're of consenting age in Earth terms now, it doesn't mean you have to do anything you're not ready for, right? Even if you're Zim’s… No,  _ especially _ if you're Zim’s, you don't have to do  _ anything _ no matter what.”

 

Dib blinked, having not expected that answer after all the naughty things they'd done already plus all the times he was sure Zim was trying to get exactly that from him. He didn't know how to respond.

 

He took hold of Zim’s uniform top, gripping the fabric that covered his chest as he had done so many times before. “Well, maybe I  _ am _ ready now,” he decided after a bit of deliberation.

 

“Mmm, I’m not so sure of that.”

 

Dub raised his head in surprise and fixed him with an annoyed glare. “Why not?”

 

“Because you had so much trouble telling me what you wanted. - Why would it be be so hard if you're  _ ready _ for it?”

 

Dib couldn't help the exasperated huff that escaped him. “Maybe I’m just  _ shy _ and because I don't have  _ any experience?” _

 

Zim shrugged. “I think you just think you SHOULD now. I don't see or smell any evidence you actually WANT it.”

 

Whether or not Zim was right, Dib didn't know or care. Instead, he had half a mind to grab Zim’s hand and press it to his crotch, but his body was not currently displaying his ‘readiness’ as it should be.

 

He slide from Zim’s lap so he could face him and fixed him with another demanding glare. “Do I have to _beg_ _you_ for everything I want? Because if that’s the case, then I guess we may as well just forget the whole thing and _I_ won't _be Zim’s.”_

 

Zim rolled his eyes, shaking his head. “Oh, don't be silly. I wouldn't have sex with you right now even if you kissed my feet while begging Zim for it.”

 

Feeling as though Zim had just slapped him across the face, Dib’s mouth fell open in shock, while his eyes had begun stinging again too and he shot him a stricken glare as his own self-loathing rocketed right out of control. “I  _ knew _ it! I knew not even  _ YOU _ would ever want me!” he spat and jumped to his feet, running back to where they’d parked the Voot Cruiser. 

 

It didn't open for him to crawl inside and he didn't know what he'd do if it had anyway, so he just sunk down to his knees on the ground and hugged himself, sniffling. His heart ached from Zim’s harsh rejection after all the kisses and cuddles and that thing with his antennae as well. It was not something he thought he could stomach.

 

About ten minutes had passed by when he felt Zim’s presence, but he didn't look up.

 

“Hyoomans do everything prematurely, don't they?”

 

Dib refused to give him the satisfaction of a reaction and remained as he was, head bent down, glaring at a rock before him as silent tears streamed down his cheeks.

 

“You're born long before you’re capable of even the most basic forms of self-sufficiency,” Zim went on to explain, to Dib’s displeasure. “And now I’m getting the impression that hyoomans reach sexual maturity far too soon as well.”

 

When Dib still didn't react in any way, he touched his shoulder.

 

“Look, I… believe you're ready to be Zim’s; I… just don't want you to do something you’ll regret and especially if you’re doing it only because you know  _ I _ want you.”

 

Dib still didn't look up, but… “you don't want me,” he told the ex-Invader’s boots.

 

Zim narrowed his eyes. “Of  _ course _ I do! - Why do you think I keep offering to be your first?!”

 

Now Dib looked up and turned his hurt, amber glare on his companion. “What did you expect me to think when you told me you wouldn't touch me even if I  _ begged you!?” _

 

“You're supposed to think exactly what I said: I wouldn't have sex with you right now even if you kissed my feet while begging me for it. - ‘Wouldn't  _ right now.’ _ Did you even  _ notice _ that part??”

 

“Great, Zim… just make it all  _ my _ fault again…” he sniffled and cast his gaze back down.

 

“Oh! Come here, little smeet!” Zim snapped and scooped Dib up into his arms, cradling him to his chest. He turned and carried a feebly protesting Dib back to the sheet they’d spread out earlier for their picnic and sat down. Using his PAK legs for support as an extra set of arms, he settled back with the amber-eyed Irken cuddled to his chest.

 

“Zim,” Dib whined. Whether he wanted to be there in his companion’s arms right then or not, he had even less desire to struggle with Zim for freedom and gave up his half-hearted attempt. Instead, he curled in on himself, head bent down until his chin pressed against his chest and his knees touched his forehead, antennae laid back and flush against his head.

 

Zim cradled him, supporting his ball of Sweetling and lowered his head down to kiss the back of Dib’s head. “I suppose sweeting is full of mood swings too, huh?”

 

“Great, just blame it on  _ that _ too,” Dib spat. “It’s  _ mood swings _ or  _ broken Earthling Dib _ again! But definitely not anything to do with you  _ rejecting me _ when I finally agreed to be more than just friends with you!”

 

Zim stiffened. “But I  _ didn't _ reject you!” the ex-invader cried in frustration. “What is so  _ wrong _ with me wanting to make sure you're ready?? What’s WRONG with me not wanting to do something to you that you’ll regret??”

 

Dib gave a start, feeling as though he was being scolded and curled even tighter on himself with an angry sob. He didn’t know what to say, only wished Zim would stop yelling at him.

 

“By the Tallest, Dib! I don't want you to  _ HATE ME _ afterwards!” Zim continued his rant, his own tone having taken on a desperate note. “I-I’ve done  _ enough _ of that already. - But... ZIM DIDN'T  _ KNOW!” _

 

Dib raised his head enough to dash at his eyes and over his nose. “Wait… what didn't you know, Zim?” he demanded.

 

“That you’re my-” He barely caught himself. “Oh, just  _ forget _ it, Dib,” Zim grumbled sharply, then softened his tone to an almost pleading one. “Just… stop thinking that I’m always trying to  _ hurt _ you still!”

 

That was literally all he could take, the so-called last straw, Dib jumped out of Zim’s lap and whirled around to face him, fists balled in anger, and he could feel his sharp claws threaten to pierce his palms. He didn't care. “Then stop treating me like I’m just a little smeet who doesn't know anything ALL THE TIME!”

 

Eyes wide at Dib’s action and words, Zim sprung to his feet as well and glared at Dib. “YOU  _ ARE _ A SMEET!”

 

“I AM NOT! I’M AN ADULT!”

 

“THAT ACTS LIKE A SMEET!”

 

“AND YOU'RE A KNOW-IT-ALL WITH AN OVER-INFLATED EGO!”

 

“AT LEAST I  _ HAVE _ AN EGO INSTEAD OF ALWAYS CRYING ABOUT HOW ‘BROKEN’ I AM!”

 

“Excuse me, Boys, but is something wrong here?”

 

Both whirled around to the unwelcome interloper.  _ “SHUT UP!” _

 

The man stepped back with a gasp, staring wide-eyed at them. “Holy..! Are you two…  _ aliens??” _

 

Both gave a start, suddenly realising they’d just been caught without their disguises and shared a panicked look.

 

“We’re… just having a dress rehearsal for our appearance at the sci-fi con!” Zim was the quickest to react. “Pretty cool costumes, no? I spent a week straight just working on his!” He pointed to Dib with an over-exaggerated grin. “Area 51 Marina seemed like the perfect place to test them out.”

 

“YES!” Catching on, Dib quickly nodded. “A-and these are animatronics!” he indicated his antennae and wagged them up and down, mirroring Zim’s grin. “That was MY idea. - Cool, huh?”

 

“They're ok, I guess,” the man said, suddenly looking far less impressed than he had before. “I’d lose all the colours, though, if I were you;  _ everyone _ knows aliens are grey-skinned with soulless black eyes.”

 

Both frowned, taken aback and insulted.  _ “WHAT!?” _

 

“Soulless like the black holes they come from.” The man shrugged. “It’s in all the papers.”

 

Now Zim looked horrified. “P-papers?”

 

“Tabloids. Like the shots of those ones they got over there in the real Area 51, you know?”

 

Now Zim looked positively horrified. “Th-there  _ are _ aliens in the Area 51?”

 

“Yep, and they’re grey, not rainbow, so you better fix that before you get to Las Vegas or else everyone’s going to think you belong over in the Ladybird Con for Girls.”

 

Both Zim and Dib exchanged confused looks.

 

“Anyway, I’d better be goin’. Maybe I’ll see ya in Las Vegas. - I’ll be the one dressed like a  _ proper _ alien.” He winked.

 

“Uh… sure,” Dib replied.

 

“Also, watch out: We’re supposed to have a thunderstorm tonight and you wouldn't want to ruin your costumes.”

 

“A thunderstorm?? - Zim, we can't get caught in the rain!” Dib gasped.

 

“Uh, yes! Thank you for the information, fellow hyooman-worm.” Zim quickly took control. “We will put our costumes away before the rain comes, be assured!”

 

“Good idea. Have a nice evening, Boys.” With that, he turned and made his way back toward the Voot Cruiser. A minute later, they heard the engine of a pickup start and drive off.

 

Both let out matching heavy sighs of relief, then Dib raised his gaze to the sky. In the distance, he could indeed see what looked like a storm approaching.

 

“Zim? I-I think he’s right…”

 

Zim looked too. “Yes… I… I’ve got this, hold on…”

 

He went back to the Voot Cruiser and removed something, which he brought over. It was a tablet much like then one he’d been using during Dib’s Sweetening, but was larger and he pulled out a stylus with his left hand, then began drawing.

 

Dib came over to see, but Zim sharply turned away, blocking his view. 

 

“Zim is being BRILLIANT! - Let him work!”

 

“What are you doing?”

 

“I am preparing a place to put our ‘costumes’.”

 

He tapped a button and the tablet toned, then rose from Zim’s hands and landed on the ground before them, where it vibrated for a moment then suddenly mechanical tentacles shot out and began forming a basic rectangular shape. After that, walls and a roof were drawn holographically, then filled in and solidified.

 

Dib gaped in amazement, unable to take his eyes off it; and when Zim slipped his arm around his waist, he slipped his arm around Zim’s shoulders. They watched until the the thing was finished and settled down, displaying a large tent, complete with what looked like a zipper opening.

 

“That… was… AMAZING!”

 

“Yes, I know.” Zim then gestured toward it, taking a step forward and offering Dib his arm. “Shall we?”

 

Taking Zim’s offered arm, Dib let the ruby-eyed Irken guide him inside, ducking down as they entered it. Inside, he saw what looked like two comfortable looking sleeping bags zipped together to make a large one and a nest of pillows as well.

 

“Does this please the Dib?”

 

“Yeah! It’s great, Zim!”

 

“Then I shall just go fetch our picnic before it rains,” he replied and left the tent, the wind blowing in through the entrance and causing Dib to shiver when it hit his  sensitive antennae.

 

Dib watched Zim slip out, and then he removed his coat and boots and sat cross-legged on the sleeping bag, casting his eyes to his lap and remembering their argument. He felt bad for how he'd acted earlier, but he'd simply been so hurt over the initial rejection that he hadn't been able to think rationally anymore. Yet there was Zim, despite it all, taking care of him again. HE’D been the one who had been able to deal with their surprise visitor in a way that wouldn't give them away. Zim. Not Dib. Dib would've just panicked.

 

When the ruby-eyed irken returned with their leftover food, Dib looked up at him. “Zim, I… I’m sorry… I don't know why I got so upset.”

 

Zim looked down at him for a moment, then stowed their food and closed the entrance, before turning back to Dib, fists on his hips. “My insubordinate little smeet,” he began, clicking his tongue as he approached him, then reached down to take his chin between forefinger and thumb.

 

Dib looked up, feeling ashamed and worrying what his companion had in store, for the ex-invader’s wrath had always been terrible in the past.

 

“Zim accepts your apology,” he announced after a moment. Then he caressed over Dib’s lip with his thumb, pursing his brow. “And… Zim is sorry too.”

 

Dib's blinked. “Y-you are? But it was my-”

 

Zim placed his fingers to Dib’s lips. “Zim said things he shouldn't have. Things that you…  _ didn't _ deserve.” He withdrew his hand. “Can you forgive Zim?”

 

Damnit if he wasn't about to start crying again, so touched was he by Zim’s words. He sniffled and nodded. “Y-yeah, Zim. I forgive you. And… so… d-does that mean we’re still..?”

 

“I love you, Dib.”

 

Dib swallowed. “R-really? Even after all the things I said?”

 

“Dib, I… I think I deserved them. You wouldn't have said them if I hadn't.”

 

“Not really… But, nevermind… Just… I-I love you too, Zim!”

 

Dib wiped his eyes and Zim sat down next to him, wrapping his arms around the amber-eyed Irken. Dib looked down at him and lowered his head with the intention to rest it on his companion’s shoulder when Zim caught him in a kiss. Dib closed his eyes and, with a nasally grunt, returned it.

 

Zim slid his arms up Dib’s back and pulled him close, one hand moving farther up, over his neck and stopping at the back of his head. Zim parted his lips and his tongue slipped out and into Dib’s mouth where it entwined with his.

 

Dib’s heart soared in his his chest and he wrapped his arms around Zim’s shoulders. In that moment, he wondered why it had taken him so long to realise how much he loved Zim, that it has  _ always _ been Zim.

 

Dib felt his antennae twitch and suddenly Zim sharply drew back and broke the kiss, the surprise causing Dib to gasp. “Zim!” Zim’s antennae were twitching as well and his ruby eyes were wide and fearful.

 

A deafening crash of thunder sounded right over their heads and sent the ex-invader diving for the sleeping bag where he made a mad scramble to the other side of their ‘tent’. Unable to go farther, he turned around, pressed his back against the wall, and wrapped his arms around his knees, his antennae laid flat to his head as he looked fearfully up at the ceiling

 

It took Dib a few moments to comprehend what had just happened, then he looked over to Zim, who let out a squeak when another crash came. Following that crash, heavy rain began to patter against the roof of the tent and Zim whimpered, shrinking deeper. Dib jumped to action, crawling over the sleeping bag to his companion.

 

“Zim?”

 

When he got no response other than another whimper, he settled down next to him and wrapped his arms around him, pulling the trembling Irken close. Zim didn't protest and even leaned into the embrace, though his entire body remained impossibly tense, as though ready to spring to action at the slightest of provocations.

 

The thunder crashed again and Zim jumped, huddling tighter against Dib.

 

“Zim! It’s ok, I’ve got you! It-it’s just thunder.” He hoped the sound of his voice might bring some comfort to his companion. “And the rain can't get into your tent, just look? It’s staying dry; WE’RE staying dry.”

 

It seemed to take an eternity, but finally he felt his companion relax somewhat.

 

Uncoiling himself, he spoke in a shaky voice. “I-I’m sorry, Dib…”

 

“What are you sorry for? Being afraid of a thunderstorm?”

 

“Y-yes…”

 

“Why? You know what water does to y- I mean, us, so I don't see why you should apologise for being scared of it.” Dib was too, now that he had a body that was weak to it.

 

“I am-”

 

Another crash and Zim curled up again, so Dib patted his side, urging him to scoot into his lap, and the ruby-eyed Irken couldn't seem to scramble over his leg fast enough. Zim settled securely in Dib’s lap and curled up tight, only relaxing again when the rumbling had passed again. The following flashes of lightning didn't seem to bother the ex-invader.

 

Zim uncoiled again and shook his head, then rubbed it, scratching near the base of one of his antennae. “I am a highly trained  _ INVADER, _ Irken soldier elite to the  _ highest _ degree!”

 

“And you're afraid of having something dumped on you that acts like acid when it comes in contact with your skin.”

 

Zim nodded and jumped at yet another crash.

 

“Is there anything I could do to help?” Dib asked when he felt Zim relax again.

 

“I-I don't know…”

  
Dib looked down at his companion and his eyes landed on the antennae Zim had folded tightly against his head. Sighing, the amber-eyed Irken lowered his head and tucked Zim’s head under his chin as Zim had done so many times for him.   
  
“How.. do Irkens comfort each other?”   
  
Zim exhaled slowly. “You’re doing fine.” He sounded dejected and Dib simply squeezed him, not knowing what to say.   
  
They waited for the storm to pass like this, cuddled up with Zim jumping or flinching with each round of thunder. For both, it seemed like an eternity before it slowly began to move on its way, becoming quieter.   
  
Zim finally stirred when the roaring crashes had reached a lower decibel and he crawled from Dib’s lap over to the edge of the sleeping bag where he stood up and stretched. After a moment, he looked back at Dib apologetically.   
  
“I… guess I really ruined your birthday, huh?”   
  
“What?” Dib’s head snapped up and he crawled after Zim, standing up as well. “Why would you think you ruined my birthday??”   
  
Zim turned his gaze away from Dib. “Because I… am supposed to  _ protect you, _ not curl up in fear like a newly hatched smeet because of some  _ miserable Earth weather!” _

  
Having no idea what to say to help his companion, Dib simply pulled him into a hug and kissed his forehead; and with a small grumble of protest, Zim slowly wrapped his arms around Dib, then sighed in surrender.   
  
“I guess I’ll just… have to try and make it up to you tomorrow…”   
  
Since drew back. “What? No! Zim, you-you didn't ruin my birthday! I-I even liked being able to hold you like you did with me while I was going through that Irken puberty!”   
  
Zim raised his head and met his eyes. “Really?”   
  
Dib nodded. “Yes, really. I… could do something for  _ you _ for once, you know?”   
  
One corner of Zim’s mouth pulled up in a smile. “Ok.” Then he took Dib’s hands. “Dib… I wanted to ask you this earlier… before the sex thing and our fight. - Um… you said you wanted to be Zim’s, so… if that’s actually still the case, would you also be Zim’s…  _ boyfriend?” _ __  
  
Dib blinked. “That was… out of the blue.”   
  
Zim pursed his eyebrows worriedly. “Was it bad?” His antennae fell. “I’m sorry.”   
  
Dib shook his head sharply. “No! No, it’s fine and… well, um… what do you think?? Of  _ course _ I want to be your boyfriend! - I-I  _ never _ thought I’d ever hear myself  _ say _ that, but yes, Zim!”   
  
The ruby-eyed Irken looked up, his antennae raised. “R-really?”   
  
“Yes, really!”   
  
“OH, DIB!” Zim jumped onto Dib, throwing his arms around his neck and squeezing him right. __ “MY DIB!” He wrapped his legs around Dib.   
  
Dib chuckled a little as he staggered back to keep his balance and blushed at the hug, but wrapped his arms around his companion’s waist and held Zim securely to him, he closed his eyes and pressed his cheek against the other’s, resting his chin against the uniformed shoulder.   
  
“I love you, my Dib,” Zim purred into his ear hole and softly kissed Dib’s temple. Then he drew back to look at Dib, cupping his cheeks.   
  
“I love you too… my Zim.” He hoped his companion wouldn't be upset to be called that.   
  
Zim slid his hands down to Dib’s neck and caressed with the gloved tips of his claws, so light was the touch that it sent little chills up the amber-eyed Irken’s back. Zim’s thumbs grazed his jawbone and the ruby-eyed Irken leaned in and kissed him.   
  
Dib closed his eyes and returned it, parting his lips slightly in invitation, and tightened his arms around the ex-invader’s waist. When Zim’s tongue slipped between his lips and found his own, he staggered, feeling like his legs were turning to jelly.   
  
Sudden metallic sounds met his ears as he started to fall and his descent halted before he could fully collapse. Now supported, he gave it all no second thought and, with a nasally moan, opened his mouth wider, inviting Zim in deeper.   
  
With a sound that was somewhere between a mix of a purr and a growl, Zim took Dib’s head in his hands, assuming full control and holding it securely, and deepened the kiss, sealing his lips to Dib’s as his long tongue slid in farther and coiled around the other’s.   
  
Dib moaned again, losing himself completely and wanting only more and more, his blood rushing and curling into a painful, pulsating knot somewhere deep within his abdomen. He gasped into the kiss, his own tongue curling against Zim’s. 

 

Everything he’d ever tried to deny about his feelings and desire came to a head and burst into a million shards. He moaned again and tightened his grip on Zim. He only wanted to go to the sleeping bags, to lay down on them and be pressed into them, to have Zim remove his clothes and to remove Zim’s blasted uniform. To feel him skin-to-skin.   
  
He couldn't breathe anymore, didn't try, light-headed. How was he even still standing? With the plan to take Zim to the sleeping bag bed, to lay down into the nest of pillows with him, he again tightened his grip on the ex-invader and tried to move to execute his plan.   
  
Whatever was keeping him from falling in place, his legs were still mush so it wasn't that, was preventing him from twisting. He tried harder.    
  
“OW!” Zim shrieked, removing his tongue all at once from Dib’s mouth and drawing his head back, an expression of pain.   
  
“Guh!” Dib gasped at the sudden loss of Zim and his tongue.   
  
“You bit my tongue!” Zim snapped at him, glaring and holding the smarting appendage. He released the amber-eyed Irken and, with a smooth and fluid movement, unwrapped his legs from Dib’s waist, then, when he was sure Dib was secure on his feet, he lowered himself to the ground via his extended PAK-legs and turned to the sleeping bag.   
  
“I’m sorry,” Dib said to his companion’s back as Zim bent over and removed his boots. “I-I didn't mean to bite...” His voice was nearly a whimper, but he couldn't help it, for he felt unbelievably rebuffed by Zim.   
  
The ruby-eyed Irken ignored his plight and crawled over and up to the nest of pillows and settled down, getting comfortable, then, with the tip of his tongue still hanging out of his mouth, held his arms out for Dib.   
  
“Come here, my little Sweeting,” he purred warmly and Dib could hardly get over to him fast enough. Once he was laying in place, Zim caressed Dib's temple. “I know you didn't mean to bite Zim.”   
  
Dib looked up and, overcome with a sudden longing, he turned over and straddled Zim’s legs, placing his hands on his shoulders and gazed into his wide, ruby eyes.   
  
The ex-invader smirked. “Hmmm... so is sweeting starting to  _ bother _ my Sweetling?”   
  
Dib had no idea what was causing his blood to rush and his body to ache, other than apparently being a healthy young man, but he desired Zim badly and so, staring intently into his companion's glittering, ruby eyes, he nodded, lips parted slightly and his breathing shallow.   
  
“And you want Zim to make it better?” Zim purred and Dib nodded again. He scratched his chin, then smirked wickedly at his amber-eyed Sweetling. “And do you want it so badly that you would even  _ beg _ Zim for his help?”   
  
Dib blinked, almost choking, though as not only was his dick hard, but even his behind seemed to ache, he decided he’d do just about anything Zim asked.  _ Even beg. _ He swallowed and nodded to Zim.   
  
Zim’s pleased smirk grew wider and he rested his hands on Dib’s thighs, but didn't caress. “Ah, not even a protest first. Just directly agree to anything Zim wishes.” He licked his lips suggestively.   
  
“Ziiiim,” Dib whined, wishing so much for Zim to touch him. To flip Dib over and shred his clothes while kissing him madly. His own grip on his companion’s uniformed shoulders tightened unwittingly.   
  
Zim reached up and placed his finger to Dib’s lip, slipping his pointer up to the first knuckle between them. If Dib didn't know any better, he thought Zim almost looked longingly as well.   
  
Zim sighed and withdrew his finger, running his thumb over Dib’s bottom lip. “But you told Zim you didn't want your first time to be just because of raging hormones. So, -” He patted Dib’s cheek affectionately. “- Zim will not help you.”   
  
Dib’s mouth fell open. “But-but-but…  _ ZIM!” _ __  
  
Zim shook his head. “I promised that your first time would be special if it was with me, and that is exactly what I will do. - So, no sex for Dib." He caressed Dib's cheek.  __ "...Or Zim," he added softly.

  
Dib closed his mouth and glared momentarily at his companion in confusion as his brain tried to sorry out what he’s just heard, then sighed and looked at him, brow pursed. “That’s really sweet, Zim,” he murmured, and it was; he loved Zim even more for it.  _ ‘But…’ _ he bit his lip for a moment before taking a deep breath and proceeding with his persuasion attempt. “It  _ won't _ be just raging hormones, Zim. Not with  _ you! _ Because.. because I already  _ LOVE you _ and I’m not… I'm not trying to  _ deny _ how much I do anymore.” Zim listened quietly, not interrupting and not shaking his head at Dib, so the amber-eyed Irken continued. “I always wanted my first time to be with someone  _ I love _ and who  _ loves me _ too, and… and that’s  _ you, _ Zim!”   
  
Zim raised a non-existent eyebrow, still watching him silently, and Dib hoped the ruby-eyed Irken was actually considering it.   
  
_ “Please, _ Zim! I mean… as-as long as  _ you _ actually want that  _ with me _ too, of course.”   
  
Zim turned his gaze to the side and away from Dib. “I want you too, Dib, but… I don't want to do anything that would make you hate me afterward.” Then he looked back up at his pleading companion. “And I don't want you to feel like I’m just taking advantage of you because you're sweeting.”   
  
Dib leaned closer to his companion, gazing deeply into glittering ruby. “And that’s how I know it will be ok if… if it’s with  _ you… _ even right now  _ while _ I'm sweeting.”   
  
“Ohhh, Diiib…” Zim moaned and gulped, but still didn't make any moves on his eager and  _ oh-so-willing _ companion.   
  
"Zim, please! I'll even  _ beg you, _ if you want!" He took a deep breath and gulped. "I-I'll even... - I am SO going to regret this! - I'll call you 'Master' or-or 'Lord Zim' or...  _ whatever _ you want me to!" He felt Zim squirm beneath him and the corners of his mouth turned up for he was certain he almost had the ex-invader. He was also sure he was ready do nearly  _ anything _ that would turn his companion, no, his  _ boyfriend, _ on as badly as he was.

  
“D-iii-ib…” Zim whined now, his own eyes pleading. “You make this so  _ hard!” _ __  
  
“I  _ want _ to make  __ Zim so hard!” Dib corrected and licked his lips as suggestively as he could.   
  
Feeling Zim’s hand twitch against his thigh, he looked down, took it in his own and brought it up to his lips, then carefully took the tip of the glove between his teeth and pulled it off. He received a hard look from Zim, then, with a swift and fluid movement, the ruby-eyed Irken snatched it from his mouth. He tossed it aside.

  
“From now on, you will address me as your  _ Lord Zim.” _ The statement was firm, commanding, and his gaze showed he would accept nothing less but full obedience from Dib.   
  
“Ok, yes,” Dib replied, excited and searching Zim’s eyes for any indication that this meant it was a  _ ‘yes’  _ from his companion too.

  
Zim leaned in close, eyes narrowed. “Ok, yes, _what?”_ He hissed, staring intently, his ruby eyes burning into Dib’s soul.  
  
“Huh?” Dib blinked, suddenly unsure he hadn't bit off more than he could chew with his game.  
  
Zim raised his hand from Dib’s chin to the top of his head where he hooked his thumb around the base of one of Dib’s antennae. “Yes, _WHAT,_ little Dib?” he repeated intensely, pressing Dib’s head down so it was just below his eye-level and the amber-eyed Irken had to look up to meet his eyes.  
  
All of a sudden Dib had no idea what was expected of him and swallowed, shrugging. “I-I don't know. Yes, _please?”_ he guessed.  
  
Zim’s eyes narrowed even more. “You will say: yes, _my Lord Zim.”_   
  
Dib blinked and gulped, torn between whether this was sexy or actually kind of scary. He decided it was exciting and smirked back, looking up into Zim’s eyes as he joined the game. “Yes, _my Lord Zim!”_  
  
Zim smiled. “That’s better, my little Dib.” Then he leaned back into his pillows and removed his hand from Dib's head. “And now, you will go to our storage of snacks and fetch a bar of chocolate for Zim… -” he pointed in the direction where he had stored the leftovers from Dib’s birthday picnic earlier. “- And when you have sufficiently completed _that_ task, you will return to me and kneel down like a good little Sweetling, then you will surrender the chocolate to me and I will give you dessert while I decide what best to do with you.”  
  


Dib cocked his head. Chocolate hadn't been what he wanted, but decided to humour his companion. “Yes, my Lord Zim,” he purred in what he hoped sounded sexy and got up to do exactly that.

 

“Good Dib.”

 

He rummaged through there snacks, finding a few different chocolate bars and turned back to Zim. “Uh, Zim- I mean,  _ Lord Zim?” _

 

“Yes, little Dib?” Zim called back from his spot.

 

“Uh, there are a few different chocolate bars here, which one do you want?”

 

“Oh, just this once I’ll let  _ the birthday boy _ choose what tickles his taste buds best.”

 

Dib couldn't help but giggle softly and smile, then he selected one and hurried back over to Zim. 

 

“Here!” He held it out then remembered the instructions. “Oh, um…” He knelt down before his companion as Zim had told him to and, getting an idea, bowed his head and held up the chocolate like an offering. “Here, my Lord Zim.”

 

“Mmm,” Zim purred and took the bar from him. “Keep that up and I may just have to give you a special reward.” He tore it open with his teeth and broke off a piece, then reached out and brushed it against Dib’s lips. When Dib parted them, he slipped it into Dib's mouth and then brushed Dib’s cheeks with the backs of his fingers. 

 

He then got up and moved around behind Dib where he placed his hands on the amber-eyed Irken’s shoulders and leaned in close to his ear. “Do you trust me?” His mouth full, Dib simply nodded. “Good. Then I’m going to remove your PAK long enough for you to take off your shirt for me. Do you agree, my Dib?” Again Dib nodded and Zim touched the spot on the PAK causing it to detach.

 

The clock popped up in his mind’s eye and began counting down from ten minutes, and that jolted him into action. With a gasp, he hastily grabbed the hem of his shirt and yanked it over his head as fast as he could.

 

“Woah! Watch it!” Zim cried, barely dodging an elbow.

 

“Sorry!” Dib cried, and shook his head, wishing that life-clock would go away. “Hurry! M-my PAK!  _ Please!” _

 

“Of course,” Zim purred and reattached it, inciting a relieved sigh from his Dib. He warmly squeezed the skinny shoulder. “Believe me, my Sweetling, I would never put you in any real danger.” He leaned forward and kissed the back of Dib's head. “Now, for your next duty - are you ready for another one yet?”

 

Dib swallowed and tried to calm himself from his earlier shock. “Sorry… I-I just hate it when that happens, you know? I mean, having a clock literally tick down the seconds you still have to live??” He shuddered.

 

Zim slipped his arms around Dib’s shoulders and, kneeling behind him so he could hold Dib to his front, brushed his cheek against his companion's. “I’m sorry; I didn't think it would give you such a scare still. - Let's take a break and you just curl up in Zim’s arms until you feel better, ok?”

 

Sighing, Dib nodded and Zim moved back to the best of pillows, then held his arms out and Dib curled up in his lap and laid his head against Zim’s, inhaling deeply of his boyfriend’s unique and soothing scent.

 

Deciding his earlier playful mood was over, Dib simply snuggled with Zim, resting his head on Zim’s shoulder, and they ate the chocolate bar together.

 

“Sorry about that,” Dib replied at some point. “You were probably looking forward to sex, right?” He'd hoped Zim had actually been.

 

“No sorries, my Dib,” Zim purred and kissed Dib’s head. “Zim will live,” he added teasing. “But will my Dib? Since he seemed to have a much  _ mightier need!” _

 

Dib blushed. It wasn't that his body wasn't still raging for it, and it wasn't that he didn't have an erection in his pants still, but that he, himself, was no longer in the mood mentally. Thinking back on how he’d acted, how his desire had gotten the better of him, was embarrassing.

 

“Sorry I got kinda wild back there… I hope you weren't upset.”

 

“Now why would I be upset having such a playful Sweetling who calls me their Lord Zim?”

 

Dib smiled and looked up. “You really liked that, huh?”

 

“Mm-hmm.”

 

“Well… I-I could probably do that again for you sometime… If you like?” Somehow the mere idea of pleasing Zim excited him. Far more so, actually, than did the idea of having sex. Was that why he’d gotten so hot, he wondered. Because he knew he was pleasing, or at least trying to please Zim?

 

The way Zim had looked at him before and the way he was looking at him now excited the amber-eyed Sweetling.

 

“Would you like it if I did? My Lord Zim?” he added to tease his companion and watched the reaction carefully.

 

“You know I would, my little Dib.” Zim caressed Dib’s naked chest where he had his hands clasped over it, then reached down and pulled the covers up higher so he could tuck his half-naked Sweetling in.

  
  


***


	26. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I do not know what happened to the formatting in the last chapter... and I am not sure how to fix it.
> 
> I now have a DeviantArt page for artwork and such related to this series (contains no spoilers of anything that isn't already shared here): https://www.deviantart.com/zadr-nir
> 
> Anyway, quick warning for descriptively MATURE scenes.

# Chapter 24

  


Having been lulled to sleep by the heavy, but soft pitter-patter of pouring rain, Dib awakened some time later to find his head nestled comfortably in Zim’s lap, while the ruby-eyed Irken was still sitting up and had his tablet in his hands. Soft music met his ears, which the groggy, amber-eyed Irken recognized as another one of Zim’s classical-music remixes. He yawned and pulled himself up to a sitting-position so he could stretch, then he rubbed the sleep from his eyes with another yawn. He could still taste the traces of chocolate from earlier.

 

He glanced back at his ruby-eyed companion, still focused on his table as he tipped intently on the screen, and Dib remembered the events from earlier: Becoming boyfriends officially, and then the playful attempt at foreplay he’d initiated, even calling Zim his ‘Lord Zim’. That quickly brought an embarrassed blush to his cheeks.

 

Unsure of what to do or say, but wanting to be close to his dearest companion, he snuggled up next to Zim and rested his head against his shoulder, hoping he wouldn’t mind the intrusion.

 

Zim turned his head and kissed Dib’s temple. “Morning, my Sweetling.”

 

“Morning, Zim.” A glance out the ‘window’ affirmed it was indeed daylight, though very grey and still heavily pouring out. He snuggled tighter to Zim and looked at the little display the ex-invader was was typing on. “So, what are you doing? _…More_ useless trivia?”

 

Zim shrugged and set it aside. “Just testing a de-encryption program I’ve been writing.” He turned to Dib and caressed his jaw affectionately. “How are you feeling? Shall I feed you?”

 

Dib yawned again and shrugged. “It-it's still raining, huh?” As he listened his antennae swished, picking up the vibrations as the heavy rain pattered on the roof of the tent.

 

“Yes, and has been all night,” Zim grumbled. “Stupid Earth weather, I hate it! And I don't have enough paste for even just one of us to get to the Cruiser!”

 

Dib pulled his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. “I guess we’ll have to wait it out then…” He rested his chin on his knees. He could imagine worse things than being, _yet again,_ trapped somewhere all alone with his new boyfriend. At least it wasn’t a hotel again this time.

 

“Yep.” Zim slipped his arm around Dib and pulled him into his lap, to Dib’s delight. “You’re going to _freeze,_ my Sweetling.” He reached down over Dib and pulled the sleeping bag up, then tilted his head as he sought out Dib’s neck with his lips, giving him a soft kiss. As Dib tilted his head to offer him better access, he kissed again, then nipped the tender skin.

 

“Mmm,” Dib murmured as chills ran up his spine. “Do that again…” he sighed, closing his eyes.

 

Zim kissed again. “Mmm? Does my Sweetling enjoy this?” As Dib answered with an affirmative hum, Zim responded with another, sharper, nip just over the pulsing vein. “What you did last night was _very_ sexy…” Zim purred, dragging the tip of his tongue over the slightly battered skin before biting again and causing Dib to squirm. “You _almost_ made Zim lose his control.”

 

Dib blinked and raised his head, blushing. “Really?”

 

“Mm-hmm…” Zim purred and slid a hand up to the base of one of Dib’s smooth antennae. “You _almost_ convinced me you were ready to be piped.” He gave it a stroke between his fingers and Dib realised from the intensity and warmth that it was naked, that Zim apparently hadn’t put his glove back on since Dib had removed it.

 

 _‘Piped?’_ Dib wondered to himself. _‘Where had Zim learned_ that _word?’_ He pushed the thought aside and got back to the more pressing question at hand: “...Just almost?”

 

“Mm,” Zim murmured against his neck, his breath sending more chills up Dib’s spine.

 

“...And if I tried again today?”

 

Zim sighed softly and rested his chin on Dib’s shoulder. “The chance of success…” He purred, his throat rumbling against Dib’s naked shoulder. “...Stands in your favour.”

 

Once the words had fully registered, the amber-eyed Irken broke out into a huge smile and unfolded himself to turn around and kneel before Zim. He looked into the ruby eyes.

 

“Then I want… I’m _ready,_ Zim.” He blushed harder than he had ever thought he was capable. “I love you and I… I want you to be the one… the one to-to take my virginity. - Or _pipe me_ or whatever you want to call it.”

 

Zim held Dib’s cheeks in his hands. “I believe you, my Dib,” he replied and they shared a meaningful look, then he leaned forward to kiss him. After only a little more than a peck, however, he drew back and gazed at Dib. “I love you and I want you too, but… once we do this, I can never erase it and I don't want you to hate me afterwards.”

 

“And now I know for sure you're the right person, Zim. Crazy at it probably sounds, but I… I really DO want you to do this with me.”

 

Zim gave a sound like a mix of a purr and growl, and when he looked at Dib, his eyes had darkened considerably. “Then I will make you _Zim’s,”_ he announced in a husky hiss.

 

Dib’s heart and desire leapt and, before he could even nod, Zim scooped him up and turned to lay him down onto the pillows, coming with and mounting him whilst, but placed his knees on either side of Dib’s legs. Again, one look into the awaiting, glittering eyes of amber, then he captured Dib’s lips.

 

Dib gave a happy moan and returned the kiss, opening up and taking Zim’s tongue, coiling it with his for as long as the ruby-eyed Irken allowed before he withdrew. Then Zim moved from his lips along his chin, his jawbone, placing kisses and licks, then lower down his neck. He lingered there, opening his mouth as though to bite again, then drew his teeth lightly along the tender skin.

 

 _“Please,_ Zim,” Dib whimpered, tilting his head more to expose his neck and offer it to him. “Bite-”

 

Zim touched Dib’s lips, stopping any words or movements, and drew back. He reached behind himself and detached his PAK, then took the hem of his uniform shirt. Smiling slyly down at Dib, he removed it in one smooth movement and Dib was presented for the first time ever with Zim’s naked torso. The ex-invader was petit and slender as Dib, but his muscles more defined, lightly chiselled attesting to him being a fit Irken soldier.

 

He replaced his PAK and before Dib could say anything, Zim was back upon him, mashing their lips together in a passionate kiss and Dib returned it, wrapping his arms around Zim and holding him tight. Zim moved once again from Dib’s lips and back to his neck, causing the inexperienced Irken to squirm as he slid his hands down Dib’s sides and teased at his hips, still covered by the uniform pants Zim had given him. Dib jerked at the touch and squirmed, arching against Zim.

 

Zim slid his hands down under him, clutched Dib’s bottom, and give it a nice, firm squeeze, startled Dib as his cheeks parted and a hot fire ignited somewhere between them.

 

He knew what sex between two males entailed and now he suddenly wanted exactly that. It seemed his body did too, for it ached longingly for Zim. “Zim!” He gasped. “Please!”

 

Zim slid his hands up and hooked his thumbs in Dib’s pants again. He paused and raised himself back up to look down at Dib. “One moment,” he hissed breathily, then dismounted Dib and smoothly yanked the amber-eyed Irken’s pants off all the way down his legs and feet, and cast them aside. He looked back at Dib, his gaze raking him up and down openly, and licked his lips. “And now, my little Dib,” he purred, his tone heady and thick, and his gaze full of barely-contained desire. He reached down with one hand and teased the waistband of Dib’s Irken underwear. “You will show THIS part of you to Zim?” he ended it in a question and waited expectantly for consent.

 

“Y-you've seen it before anyway…”

 

“Mmm, yes, but… never in this state, and never where I could -” he licked his lips. “- have _my way_ with it. - So, can I?”

 

Dib gulped and nodded, arching his bottom as a show of his willingness. “Y-yes, Zim.”

 

The ruby-eyed Irken smiled, licked his lips again, and admired the hidden package for a moment. He looked back up to Dib for a moment before he bent down and gave him a kiss, then moved down his chin and his neck, leaving slow, tender kisses as he started to make his way down the Sweetling’s chest.

 

He continued down farther, over Dib’s tummy and around his navel, then on to the hem of the Irken underwear. He placed a warm kiss right over the one-eyed Irken logo and Dib’s package, inciting a surprised gasp from Dib.

 

“Z-Zim…” Dib breathed, his boyfriend’s lips so warm even through the underwear.

His thumbs still hooked in them, Zim raised his head and began to ease the underwear down. He raised Dib’s bottom so he could slip them down the rest of the way. Dib held his breath as Zim exposed him and looked curiously, eager to know what Zim thought of him. When Zim had eased his underwear down enough that his package was revealed, the ruby-eyed Irken looked at it, then up to Dib.

 

“Well, I guess it’ll do.”

 

Dib gave a start and fixed Zim with an insulted look. “What?! Wh-what’s wrong with it??”

 

Zim shook his head, still looking at it critically. “It needs to be _harder_ for Zim,” Before Dib could respond, he took ahold of it and brought his lips to it, then gave the tip a kiss that caused Dib’s mouth to fall open, and, with his other hand, Zim tested the foreskin.

 

“S-sorry, I… I wasn't… c-circumcised…” Dib mumbled, cheeks growing hot again. “I-I should've warned you.”

 

Zim looked at him questioningly. “You aren't what?”

 

“Circumcised… cut...”

 

Zim pursed his brow and looked to Dib, one eye narrowed. “Why should anything be cut?”

 

“Well… a-a lot of Americans think the foreskin should be removed, and they do it when you're a still baby, but my dad didn't have it done to me.” He bit his lip, then added as though it would make any sense to the ex-invader. “Because we’re Mexican-American, I guess…” He blinked. “Were? Is there a such thing as a Mexican-Irken?”

 

“Oh, just shut up,” Zim hissed sharply and, without warning, took Dib into his mouth causing the amber-eyed Irken to throw his head back against the pillow and his little identity crisis pushed right out of his mind.

 

“Oh! ZIM!” Dib cried as the wet heat of Zim’s mouth surrounded his quickly-hardening head.

 

“Mmm,” Zim murmured around the captive hard-on. He drew back for a moment. “Now, remember what I do with my tongue when we kiss?” he smirked wickedly, then slid his head all the way down until his lips touched the base while coiling his tongue around it.

 

“O-OH!” Dib cried and gripped the sleeping bag in his fists.

 

Zim eased his his head back, his tongue writhing and coiling to maximize the pleasure; when Dib squirmed and moaned his name, he hummed, causing his lips and mouth to vibrate as he bobbed his head in a steady rhythm.

 

“NG!” Dib’s breath caught in his throat and he gasped, gripping the sheets tighter. “Z-ZIIIM!” he cried, helpless to do anything other than submit to the sensations his companion was causing him.

 

Zim held a steady and even rhythm for a couple minutes before slowly withdrawing, thenhe  licked his lips and gazed down at his shivering companion.

 

“Zim won't have you finishing just yet,” he informed the amber-eyed Irken.

 

“Ooh…” Dib swallowed, trying to find his voice.

 

“I still have so much in store for you.” Zim stood up and removed his pants, revealing he’d been wearing the same underwear with the purple one-eyed Irken logo over the crotch as he’d given Dib, then he kicked his pants aside and slid his hands slowly up his legs to his underwear, hooking his thumbs in the waistband when he’d straightened all the way back up.

 

“And now for the part of the amazing Zim you still haven't seen!” He grinned wickedly down at Dib. “And you will _watch_ this, my little Sweetling,” he commanded and waited for Dib to give him his full attention before he slipped his underwear down, letting them fall to his ankles.

 

When Dib’s amber gaze returned to his boyfriend’s crotch, he blinked dumbly, at first unable to make sense of what he was looking at. Then he gaped, mouth falling open as his mind slowly tried to sort out the image displayed unabashedly before him.

 

With a sudden, startled cry, Dib scrambled back to a sitting position against the wall of the tent, pointing and gaping at Zim’s package in horror. “Wha-wha- _what…”_ he stammered, gulping.

 

Zim cocked his head and narrowed his eyes, frowning. “What’s wrong? Is Zim’s love-meat-”

 

 _“WHATISTHAT???”_ Dib finally managed to blurt out and cutting off Zim’s question.

 

Zim looked down at himself, his own erection prominently displayed in all its Irken glory, and knitted his brow, then looked back at Dib. “Why, it is only the most MAGNIFICENT _love-stick_ in entire universe!” he announced, placing his fists proudly on his hips. “Pretty amazing, isn't it?” Dib, however, was still gawking at him as though Zim had revealed a _venomous snake_ instead of a penis, and Zim glared, eyes narrowed to near slits.

 

Dib managed to find his voice, but still couldn't tear his eyes away from it. “You. Are. _Never._ Putting. That. Thing. Inside. Me. _EVER!”_ he squeaked as firmly as he could manage.

 

Zim fell to all fours and crawled up to Dib, his insulted glare burning right into Dib  as the amber-eyed Irken cringed away from him, pulling his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them protectively. Zim stopped and knelt before him, standing on his knees as he gestured to it. “Oh, come on! What’s wrong with it?!”

 

“That is not a dick, that’s a… _I don't know what!”_ Dib cried hysterically, ignoring Zim’s frustration. “It-it… _THAT IS NOT HUMAN!”_

 

Zim rolled his eyes. “Of _course_ it’s not! For it is _ZIM’S!”_

 

“No! This is just NOT even happening!” Dib hid his face behind his hands and, with a heavy groan of frustration and surrender, Zim flopped back onto the pillows beside him. “Why-why didn't you _warn me_ you were so… so DIFFERENT from me!?” Dib demanded miserably, his voice breaking now.

 

“Oh!” Zim said with sudden realisation, then coughed sheepishly. “Well, I-I… I didn't actually think of it. - Hmm…” His voice was notably apologetic and Dib glanced up. “I forget that it would…. well... actually be kind of _unusual_ to you. - Ok, look, how about we just stop then… ok?”

 

 _“Definitely.”_ It was literally the only thing Dib could manage and uttered the word with conviction.

 

Zim sat down beside him and tentatively slipped an arm around him; when he received no protest he squeezed his Sweetling’s shoulder gently. With a sigh, Dib curled up against his companion, shutting his eyes so he didn't have to see the strange, alien penis.

 

“Dib... I’m a Tartling,” Zim said after a few minutes of silence. “And, well, that’s why it looks so different from yours.”

 

Dib opened his eyes and looked up, meeting Zim’s ruby eyes. “But, b-bright purple and… and ridges, and..!”

 

“Well, yours is pretty purple too, when fully erect, I saw it earlier,” he said with a firm nod, as though he thought Dib might need convincing of his observations.

 

Dib blinked and spread his knees to look at his own, though it was long since erect. He closed them and curled up again. “That doesn't explain _yours.”_

 

“As said, I’m a Tartling and the ridges are for your pleasure."

 

“Sounding like a condom ad _doesn't_ make any of this better,” Dib replied flatly.

 

Zim simply sighed and reached for the sleeping bag with his free hand and pulled it up. Dib took the cue and scooted down so he could curl up under the covers and the Tartling followed him. After a moment’s consideration, Dib turned and snuggled up to Zim, resting his head on his arm and sighing.

 

“Dib… I didn’t mean to upset you… or… -” Zim chewed on his lip, his voice soft and helpless. “- or disappoint you?” His antennae were laid back and he seemed to have trouble meeting Dib’s eyes now. “Do you hate Zim now?”

 

“No!” Dib cried at the accusation, then reached out and took Zim’s chin, turning his face up so he could look at him and Zim meet him with wide, fretful eyes. “I-I still _love_ you, Zim, I.. I just don't think I can, you know?” he whispered softly, and he was sure that nothing was going to change that, short of Zim trying to murder him, which it even looked like he could achieve just by trying to have sex with Dib.

 

“Hmm…” Zim scratched his chin in thought while giving his companion a squeeze. “Well, I think you’ll actually _like_ it, but…” He considered for a couple moments before speaking again. “Well, maybe it would help if you just played with it first?”

 

Dib blinked, then suddenly shot a withering glare at the ex-invader. “If you didn't notice, _Spaceboy,_ the mood is _GONE;_ so if _you’re_ still that horny, you’ll have to do it _yourself.”_

 

“Oh, that’s not what I meant!” Zim snapped, glaring right back at him. “I meant that just _maybe_ you’d _get used to it_ if you explored it!” When Dib’s only response was to glare even harder, the ex-invader added, “not that I _wouldn't_ enjoy it, but the thought was actually for _your_ benefit.”

 

Dib shook his head in disbelief. “You’re only digging your grave _deeper,”_ he warned through grit teeth.

 

With a frustrated and desperate snarl, Zim yanked on his antennae, ignoring when it smarted. “Oh, I don't BELIEVE this!”

 

Dib laid back down, trying not to think about how miserable he felt. “I’m just so _stupid,”_ he whined aloud.

 

Zim blinked and looked at him. “Oh, what’s wrong with you _now??”_

 

That tone didn't help anything and Dib felt his throat tighten. “I-I had really been looking forward to… you know, and now I just… I-I’m going to DIE a _virgin!”_ To make it all the more pitiful, he sniffled too. “I _am_ such a smeet…”

 

Zim released his antennae. “Dib, it… it’s not _your_ fault. I-I guess I do look pretty, er, _alien_ to you.” He gently brushed Dib’s antennae back, then wiped a tear from the amber eyes with his thumb. “Look, and I really don't know _why_ I didn't think of it before, but you're right, I should've warned you.”

 

“I’m probably the worst lover you’ve ever had,” Dib grumbled. “Such a filthy, miserable little virgin!”

 

“Oh, quit it, Dib!”

 

Instead of protesting or saying anything more on the subject, Dib just kept quiet and cuddled up tighter to his companion while he sulked.

  


***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha, I'm so mean, no? I can't make this EASY for the two now, can I? What kind of author would I be then?? ;-)
> 
> It actually cracks me up how in many ZaDR fanfic, they don't actually ever describe Zim's package, which is a pity. (Smutty fanart, however, is another story.)
> 
> Anyway, as you can see, I do deviate from the typical fan-headcanon as to how Irken penes look. Honestly, I can't understand why people seriously think it would look like their tongues. When do penes EVER look like tongues?? Never, as far as I've ever seen, and I may have seen one or two in my life.


	27. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy Holidays! I do hope you've all been having a good one so far! (That goes for whatever celebration you enjoy this season, if any; and if none, then hopefully you've at least had a nice December so far.)
> 
> So, I've been giving constant warnings like the last five chapters or something, so as of now, this is the last: This story contains adult content of all kinds.

#  Chapter 25

 

After what he was sure must’ve been hours of sulking to himself with an internal battle raging, Dib again made up his mind. With that, he raised his head to look at Zim who, as usual, was checking his tablet, but put it aside when he realised Dib was looking at him.

 

“Dib?”

 

“Ok, Zim,” Dib announced. “I-I think you're right.”

 

“Zim is always right,” his companion stated with a lopsided grin. “But what is Zim right about this time?”

 

Dib groaned.  _ “Please _ tell me why I put up with you?”

 

“Because I am _so_ _amazing!_ And you cannot RESIST my _amazingness!_ \- But really, I wanna know what I was right about. What is my sweet, sweet victory this time??”

 

“You are  _ not _ making this any easier for me, you realise that right?”

 

“Sorry. So, what is it? Please tell ZIM!”

 

Dib shook his head and sighed, then looked back up, blushing as he considered what he wanted to say. “Well, that I should probably… see if I can..” he gulped, blushing more. “See if I can get used to it… You. Your… it, er, purple thing… that.” He cringed, knowing he sounded ridiculous. “...Sorry.”

 

Zim cocked his head. “My hearing must be getting worse, because I think you just told me you’d be willing to play with my  _ magical _ purple dick?”

 

Again Dib groaned. “In less words…”

 

Zim smiled and laid back against the pillow, arching his back as he pushed the sleeping bag away and gave his hips a small thrust to display his currently flaccid package. He gestured to it. “It’s all yours, my Dib.”

 

Blushing, Dib looked down. “Huh, it’s not as purple as I remembered… And… y-you’re actually still quite large even when you’re soft,” he observed, then began to reach out, but stopped, hesitating. He glanced nervously to Zim and drew back his hand. “A-are you sure it’s ok?”

 

“Mm, yes, I am, and I’m sure it’s ok. Don’t be shy, my Dib, for you are invited to touch Zim.”

 

Dib reached out again and gulped, then reached out and took it in his hands. The skin was smooth and felt the same as Dib’s, and in Zim’s current state, the foreskin fully covered the head, though the amber-eyed Irken could tell it wasn't going to be for much longer.

 

“Hmm, I don't notice the ridges so much…”

 

“Hmm…” Zim reached down and placed his hand over Dib’s, then, tightening the hold somewhat, slowly moved it along his shaft. “Feel them now?”

 

Blushing even more, Dib nodded. “Y-yeah, I do…” As Zim released him again, Dib continued the motion, though sliding his hand along to the head and back again. He received a sharp breath from Zim.

 

“Ohhh… my Dib…”

 

“Do… you like this?”

 

“Yessss…”

 

So Dib continued, moving his hand slowly up and down, all the while Zim was hardening more and more under his ministrations.

 

“Ohhh…” Zim laid his head back and closed his eyes.

 

In no time at all, he began saluting Dib and, as he hardened, the purple grew steadily brighter. Despite himself, Dib smiled, glad to see he was having that effect on the ex-invader.

 

“Ahhh…” Zim breathed, gripping the sleeping bag in his fists.

 

Feeling emboldened, Dib tightened his hand and increased his speed.

 

“Ah! Oh, Diiiiib…” Zim breathily moaned.

 

Dib smiled and continued, hoping he was doing ok, though Zim’s increased breathing seemed to show he was.

 

He paused and looked at his companion. “Zim?”

 

One ruby eye opened, then the other. “Yes, my Dib?”

 

“C… could I make you cum?”

 

“You can do anything you want to Zim.”

 

“But can you help me? I-I don't know how you like it…”

 

Zim smiled and licked his lips. “Well, you’re doing pretty good so far, but sure.” He laid his hand over Dib’s again and guided him. “Like this.” He took a quicker motion than Dib had and with his free hand, reached behind Dib’s head and pulled him in for a kiss.

 

Dib enjoyed the kiss for a moment, but then ended it with a quick peck and drew back, so he could watch. When fully hard, Zim’s head was notably larger than his shaft, though certainly generous in its own right. The ridges were certainly a strange sensation against the palm of his hand. And the whole thing was now the bright purple he'd remembered, perhaps even brighter.

 

“Zim? Is it going to be the same as with me when you cum? Or is there anything I need to know first?” Not that it was going to shoot through the roof, or float in the air like bubbles, or _whatever_ alien ejaculation did!

 

Zim, who had started to pant, swallowed and paused the movement “Uh… I-I think it’s like yours. It’s not… green or… anything.”

 

“Ok.” Dib resumed moving and Zim followed suit, guiding Dib the way he wanted it.

 

Zim’s movement grew more rapid and focused mainly on the upper half and head.

 

“Mmm… Your hand… feels so… so good… m-my Dib,” he moaned between breaths. “Oooh, Dib…”

 

Dib glanced up, then back down, watching curiously as they both pleasured Zim. Zim increased the tempo again and, with a moan, began rocking his hips to it.

 

“Mm…” Dib couldn't help the sound that escaped his own lips as he pumped Zim. He glanced at his companion and saw Zim’s eyes were focused on their work, his teeth grit and bared.

 

“Oh, Dib! I…” Zim’s breath hitched and he opened his mouth to pant. Again he increased speed, tightening his grip on Dib’s hand. He gasped again and his antennae twitched. “I-I’m… so… so c-close..!”

 

Dib looked back down, not wanting to miss it. One more tempo increase.

 

“OH! OH! Y-YES! - D-DIB!” Zim moaned and threw his head back. “I’M GOING TO-AHH!” His breath caught as his entire body flexed, a twitch of his dick and suddenly white cum spurted from the tip. He kept Dib’s hand moving, though, and released a few more spurts of orgasm before he stopped and collapsed back, panting. “Oh, my Dib…” Zim murmured as he caught his breath.

 

Dib raised his hand, inspecting the cum that had landed on it. Zim opened an eye and watched him.

 

“S-sorry… I guess I’ve been a little backed up…”

 

“Oh.”

 

Zim reached out and took Dib’s rest, then brought the Sweetling’s hand to his mouth and licked.

 

Dib froze as he watched the serpentine tongue swirl around his fingers, then Zim pulled them into his mouth and suckled, cleaning every bit off.

 

“Mmm,” the ruby-eyed Irken purred as he pulled Dib’s fingers out, then licked his lips.

 

Dib smirked a little. “And how does it taste?”

 

“Like sperma. - Want to try?” Zim held his own cum-soiled hand up before Dib and offered it to him.

 

The amber-eyed Irken hesitated, unsure if he was ready to try that yet or not.

 

“No? That’s ok, my Sweetling, but if you’d get me cleansing-”

 

Dib grabbed his hand as he’d started to withdraw it, then quickly licked the drops of cum before he lost the chance.

 

“Ohhhh… yessss…” Zim purred, watching intently and licking his lips. As Dib licked, Zim turned his hand, making it easier for his companion to get all of it.

 

Dib blinked once he registered the taste and pursed his eyebrows as he finished the job. “It’s…  _ sweet.” _   Whatever he’d expected it to taste like, that hadn't been it.

 

Zim grinned a little, then drew his finger through the small puddle on his stomach. He then brought the finger to Dib’s lips and rubbed the cum onto them, watching as his companion blushed and licked his lips clean.

 

“So, we have two options: Either you bring Zim the cleansing chalk now, or you clean Zim up with your mouth.”

 

Dib gulped and looked down. Cleaning Zim also meant licking or even sucking that part of him. He wanted to please his boyfriend, to be a good lover that would also excite him, but he wasn't sure he could do that just yet.

 

He looked back to the ruby eyes. “Is it really ok if I get you cleansing chalk? You won't be too disappointed?”

 

“Anything that makes you most comfortable is ok, my Sweetling. The disappointment would only be if you did something you didn't actually  _ want _ to.”

 

Dib smiled, touched. “Zim, I…” He paused, not sure what he wanted to say, and gave Zim a sheepish smile.

 

“Now, go get the cleansing chalk before this drips onto our bedding.”

 

Dib nodded and got up, finding a number of wrapped bars in a bag and returning with one shortly. Then Dib opened it and began wiping Zim with it, wanting to at least do that much for his boyfriend.

 

“Mmm, I love you,” Zim murmured as he watched.

 

“I love you too, Zim,” he replied as he worked, making sure to clean every last bit.

 

When he’d finished, he slipped the bar back in the wrapper and cuddled up to the orgasm-warmed, ruby-eyed Irken.

 

“My sweet Dib,” Zim murmured contentedly as he wrapped his arms around his Sweetling.

 

Dib smiled. “And… and was it good? Your… When you came, I mean.”

 

“Mm-hm. Thank you for that.” Zim rubbed his cheek against Dib’s. “And you? How do you feel now?”

 

“Kind of weird. I’ve never done that to anyone before. Er, except m-myself…” The last admission caused him to blush.

 

Zim yawned and squeezed Dib. “But you don’t feel bad?”

 

Dib shrugged. “Is it bad that I… kinda liked doing that?”

 

“Did you?”

 

“Yeah…”

 

“And do you feel a little more comfortable with Zim’s..?”

 

“If you call it ‘lovemeat’ again, I’m smothering you with a pillow!” He fingered one to make his point.

 

Zim giggled softly. “Ok, ok. But do you feel at least a little less afraid of Zim’s… uh… penis?”

 

Dib looked down at it and considered. “Well, I guess it didn't bite me, did it?”

 

Zim opened his eyes wide and looked at Dib. “You thought it would  _ bite _ you?”

 

Grinning playfully, though blushing, Dib shrugged. “Well, I mean you are  _ alien scum, _ so who knows what sort of kinky sex gets you going!”

 

Now Zim smirked. “You make me want to  _ show _ you.”

 

Dib gulped, finding himself to be half-intrigued by the prospect. “Hm…” He looked up and met Zim’s eyes. “What  _ is _ Irken sex like?”

 

“Give Zim a few minutes to recharge and I’ll show you all the hot, kinky things Irkens do to each other, if you want.”

 

Dib’s breath caught in his throat and he swallowed. “I’m serious, Zim!”

 

“I am too! I’ll turn your squeedlyspooch inside out with my amazing purple love- eh-heh, dick..!”

 

“And that’s exactly what I mean! How do I know that’s not  _ exactly _ what you’ll do to me!? I don't  _ want _ my squeedlyspooch turned inside out!” He paused to think about it. “...Do I?”

 

Zim laughed and hugged him. “Oh, you are just too adorable, my Sweetling!”

 

“Stop! I just have no idea how my anatomy works, since you never let me dissect you.”

 

“But  _ I’m _ going to dissect  _ you _ in about ten minutes!”

 

Again Dib’s breath caught in his throat. “You are so dirty!”

 

“Mmm, first the Dib will experience the sheer power of Zim’s  _ organic sweep _ as he  _ invades _ Uranus with his almighty tallest!”

 

Dib groaned. “And I think the mood is over.”

 

“Tough, because I’m going to take you to the stars so you can  _ investigate the paranormal.” _ Then Zim winked. “I made a promise I’d help you do that, remember?”

 

“I don't recall this being included in our original agreement.”

 

“Zim is generous!”

 

“Ten minutes?”

 

“Mmm,” Zim murmured affirmatively. “An advantage to being in tart means I can do it multiple times.”

 

Dib looked down at his hands. “Will it… hurt me a lot?”

 

“I… don’t think so. I’ll be careful.” He took Dib’s chin and tilted his head to look at him. “And if it’s too much, just say so and I’ll stop any time, ok?”

 

“I know it sounds stupid, but I’m kinda scared…”

 

“Hmm… Dib, look, we’ll make a safe word right now, that way if at any time, you ever need Zim to stop, no matter what it is, you can use it and Zim will stop.”

 

“A safe word?” Suddenly alarm jolted him and he sat up, pulling away to fix his companion with a horrified stare. “Wait! A-are you going to tie me up and… and  _ whip me _ or hit me or something??”

 

“What? Dib, calm down, that’s not what I meant!” He raised his hands, waving them. “I just want us to have a word so that no matter what we’re doing, you know you can use it and I will stop. Even if it’s just because you don’t want sex right then. It’s just an emergency break, you know? - But also if you  _ do _ ever let Zim tie you up and gag you.”

 

“Oh… Wait, if you  _ gag _ me, how am I supposed to say the safety word?”

 

Zim giggled sheepishly. “Well, you… can just smack Zim?”

 

“If I’m  _ tied up??” _

 

“Well, I… I wasn't planning to tie you up or gag you right now?” As he looked at Dib, his eyes trailed over Dib’s naked body so perfectly displayed before him, the ruby darkened a few shades, and what they’d been discussing before was now forgotten. “I want you,” Zim said intensely. Without taking his eyes off the Sweetling, he got to his knees and cupped Dib’s cheeks. “Now.”

 

Dib swallowed, frozen by Zim’s look, and his heart leapt into his throat as he blushed furiously. “Z-Zim…”

 

Zim tilted his head and kissed Dib, wrapping his arms around him and holding him tight to him. His hands ran up and down the Sweetling’s back, over his PAK, down along his sides. He thrust his tongue into Dib’s mouth with a rumbling moan. His hands roved boldly over smooth, green flesh, down to Dib’s bottom where he squeezed, inciting a surprised gasp from his Pendant.

 

He drew away from Dib’s lips, kissing along his chin and jawbone, raising a hand back up to tilt Dib’s head to the side, other hand sliding up to tighten around his waist and pressing him harder against him, as he made his way to his neck and licked, then nibbled gently at the tender flesh.

 

“Ziiiim…” Dib breathed hoarsely, eyes closed and feeling as though he was being slowly swept away in Zim’s passion.

 

Zim’s mouth moved down to his shoulder, then trailing kisses across his collarbone to the other and back up the side of his neck. He paused to lick and nip there before making his way back up and slowly back to Dib’s mouth where he resumed the kiss from before, his tongue finding its way back into his companion's partly opened mouth and Dib returned the kiss, wrapping his arms around Zim.

 

Zim took Dib’s bottom again and pulled it to him, then holding him securely, turned and laid him down on the pillows, propping himself up on one elbow and caressing Dib’s jaw with the backs of his fingers. He slid his hand from Dib’s behind and up along his side, then over his chest, caressing a nipple, then farther up to Dib’s neck, his fingers grazing Dib’s jaw and he took care not to nick Dib with his claws.

  
Then his hand slid back down and squeezed a fleshy, firm cheek again, then down to his thigh and raised it a little. He stiffened suddenly and broke the kiss.   
  
“Oh… I-I must… - One moment…” He raised himself up to his knees and gazed longingly at the Sweetling laying before him, naked and just waiting to be taken.   
  
“Z-Zim?”   
  
He smiled and got to his feet. “Don’t go anywhere, my Sweetling.” He winked and went over to retrieve something from his bag, which he brought back. He knelt down beside Dib and showed him a strange-looking bottle.   
  
“What’s that? Lube?”   
  
Zim smiled and shook his head. “This is so I don't give you any smeets.”   
  
“Oh!” Dib gasped. “I-I forgot all about that! - A-are you  _ sure _ it’ll work?”   
  
“Of course.” Zim looked at him seriously. “My Dib, it always works.” When Dib bit his lip doubtfully, Zim looked down at him. “Do you trust me? Because if you don’t, then we’ll stop right now.”   
  
Meeting his eyes, though clearly nervous, Dib nodded. “I trust you, Zim.”   
  
Zim smiled. “Good, my Sweetling.” He opened the flask, tipping the lid and then aimed it at his member. In his other hand, he took his hard penis and pressed a part of the bottle, spraying a teal-coloured substance onto his penis. He applied it entirely, until his penis was covered on all sides and added a generous amount to his tip. As they watched, the colour faded and Zim smiled.   
  
"Well, that's weird," Dib observed, blinking.   
  
“It’s ready,” the ruby-eyed Irken announced and turned them back onto Dib. “Now, before we go any farther, the safe word. Pick it!”   
  
“Y-you want  _ me _ to choose the safe word?” Zim nodded and Dib thought about it for a second; in the silence that settled, his attention was drawn to the steady patter of rain on their tent. “Oh! H-how about rai- no!  _ ‘Water’?” _ __  
  
“‘Water’?” Zim repeated, blinking.   
  
“Or is that stupid? Sorry, just… because of the rain, you know? Because it's trapped us in here.”   
  
Zim smiled. “It’s perfect, my Sweetling. - So, remember: If Zim should ever stop, you know what to say and Zim will obey. - EVIL FILTHY WATER!” He reached out and touched Dib’s cheek. “Even if it’s just because Zim is trying to wake you for sleepy sex and you want him to stop pestering you.”   
  
Dib smiled. “I love you, Zim.”   
  
“I love you too, my Dib.” Then he glanced up at the roof and shuddered. “Now, let’s see what we can do about the mood music.” Eyes narrowed, he grabbed his tablet and tipped until music started, then he dimmed the lights to a soft, candlelight glow. “Better? - Oooh…” His eyes raked Dib up and down. “Yes, I think this is  __ very nice.”   
  


“Then get back here before I freeze!”

 

“Ooooh, my Sweetling wants to be a power-bottom, does he?” Then he shook his head and clicked his tongue. “That won't do.” He bared his teeth wickedly, then pounced Dib, clamping one hand over the amber-eyed Irken’s mouth as he straddled his tummy. He bent down and, in a tone somewhere between a hiss and a purr, addressed his disobedient Sweetling. “Zim is the master here.” He raised back up and drew his hand slowly away, his pointer finger lingering on the bottom lip.

 

Dib snapped at it, catching it between his teeth and grinned up defiantly; Zim met him with a smirk.

 

“Suck it, Little Dib!” He slid it all the way up to the palm in Dib’s mouth.

 

Dib coiled his tongue around the finger, though was wary of the sharp fingernail. Watching intensely, Zim licked his lips.

 

“I said,  _ suck _ it, not  _ lick _ it!” he snapped all of a sudden, giving Dib a start and amber-eyes glared up at him.

 

“You jerk,” he grumbled, having only minor problems doing so around the long, slender finger that was stuffed in his mouth.

 

Zim smiled and leaned back down. “Now, be careful while I remove my finger. I don't want to cut anything of my Sweetling’s,” he purred and slowly withdrew his finger, then replaced it with his lips, capturing Dib for another passionate kiss. “Mmm,” he moaned against Dib’s mouth and nuzzled his lips apart, then slipped his tongue inside and entwined it with Dib’s.

 

He slid his hand down along Dib, then, without breaking the kiss, moved off him and settled down beside him. He reached for Dib’s leg and raised it, pulling it towards him and rolling Dib onto his side, facing him. He pulled Dib’s leg over his hip and slipped his own between Dib’s, then slid his hand back to the Sweetling’s bottom, cupping and squeezing the cheek.

 

He moved farther back and slipped a finger between Dib’s cheeks, where he found Dib’s hole and fingered it, causing the Sweetling to give a surprised gasp. He gently ended the kiss so he could watch the inexperienced Irken.

 

“Relax, my Sweetling.” He teased the hole again. “Now, I’m going to have you lay on your back again for me.

 

Dib swallowed hard, but didn't move. “Zim, I-I don't know if I’m ready for that, yet…”

 

Zim smiled and brushed his antennae back. “That’s why I’m going to get you ready. - Now, lay on your back.”

 

Dib took a deep breath and did as he was told, looking up at his Pendant with wide-eyes, his heart pounding in his chest and his squeedlyspooch was in knots. Zim brushed his cheek, then scooted down and moved his leg over Dib. With his knee, he carefully spread Dib’s legs and knelt in between them. He licked his lips as he gazed down.

 

“You are  _ so _ sexy,” he breathed, his voice husky. “And now I want to see all of you displayed for me.” He reached under Dib’s knees with both hands. “So, I’m afraid you’re just going to have to raise them for me.” His smirk betraying his claim of being afraid, Zim raised Dib’s knees and folded them, slightly spread, against Dib’s chest. “Now, if you’d be a good Dib and keep them like this, I’ll make it very worth your while.”

 

Not trusting his voice, Dib simply nodded and took over for Zim, holding them in that position when Zim removed his hands and blushed brightly at having his privates so exposed and on-display for his soon-to-be-lover.

 

Zim smiled warmly as he looked down, feasting his eyes on the Sweetling, then he reached for Dib’s package and rubbed the length. Then slid his hand to Dib’s testicles, then under his bottom. He lowered his head and took Dib’s head into his mouth, then closed his lips and hummed.

 

“Oh, Zim!” Dib cried, almost forgetting to keep his legs up and had to hold them with his hands. Zim sucked and drew his head back, lips curled safely over his teeth, then down again and began a bobbing rhythm. Buried in Zim’s warmth, the Sweetling felt like he was in pure extacy. Zim’s antennae jobs, though incredible, simply had  _ nothing _ on his mouth and Dib squirmed in pleasure.

 

Soon Zim stopped, releasing him with a slow, long suckle, then kissed it. “Can’t let you finish too soon.” He licked his lips as he smiled at Dib, then he looked down and fingered Dib’s hole. “Now, let’s get you ready for  _ me, _ shall we?”

 

Dib gulped and Zim lowered his head again, this time however he extended his tongue and licked the closed opening.

 

“Zim!” Dib cried, horrified, but Zim ignored him and gave it a few firm licks, then inserted the pointy tip. Dib squirmed, not entirely thrilled with his partner’s apparently strange fetish, and Zim placed his hands on each side of Dib’s bottom, holding him in place.

 

Zim inserted it farther and Dib twitched, having trouble holding his legs up with the strange sensation. He’d never even had a finger go in there, and nothing larger than a thermometer - when he had been too stoned on morphine to have his temperature taken orally - a tongue was just weird!

 

Zim’s tongue, however, was warm and gentle, and Zim took care as he eased it inside, opening his Sweetling without causing pain. Dib was even surprised to find, as Zim began easing it in and out, that it even felt good.

 

“Ohhh, Zim…” he moaned, then swallowed and sucked in a shaky breath. He licked his own lips in pleasure as Zim licked inside him, easing his tongue back and forth and alighting the skin around Dib’s hole with longing.

 

After a few minutes, Zim slowly withdrew and looked at Dib, then bent over him, mounting him, and leaned in, stretching for a kiss when Dib reached up and stopped him.

 

“No, no, no! Not after your mouth was-” he shook his head and glared at Zim. “You are so dirty! That’s your kink??  _ Rimming?!” _

 

Zim licked his lips again and giggled. “You taste good, my Sweetling.” Then he grabbed Dib’s arms and pinned them on either side of his head, holding him firmly while he went in for that kiss. When Dib sharply turned his head and blocked him, Zim licked his cheek, then purred softly into his ear. “But actually I was doing it to get you ready, because if I’d used my hand -” he released Dib hands and held on up, wiggling his fingers. “- I’d have shredded you.”

 

“Oh!” Dib cried, looking back to Zim and meeting warm ruby-eyes. “Your claws! I-I didn't think of that.”

 

“I know,” Zim purred and kissed him gently. “Anyway, when you’re sweeting, it’s your juices I taste.”

 

“My juices? What are you talking about?”

 

“Your body. It makes lubricating juice, so you can recieve me.” Again he kissed Dib. “Now, I want to make you Zim’s. Do you still want that? Because there’s no going back.”

 

Dib nodded. “Y-yes, Zim. I’m still sure.” His body was too, if his aching behind was any indication. He had a feeling Zim could give him exactly what he needed to sate his desire and calm his blood.

 

Zim smiled and kissed him again, then drew up again and took hold of his penis, with his other hand, he took hold of Dib’s leg and raised it again.

 

“It’ll be easiest on you if you put your legs on my shoulders until I’ve entered you.” When Dib did as he was advised, Zim gazed at him adoringly. “I love you, my Dib. Now, relax.” He rubbed the head against Dib’s opening, smearing those natural juices he’d mentioned before all over both Dib’s bottom and his head.

 

“I love you too, Zim. - Ok… I-I’m relaxing…”

 

Zim bent down over him and, gazing intently down into amber-eyes, lined his pointed tip up. He eased forward slowly, opening Dib carefully, the natural lubricant coating him and aiding his penetration.

 

Dib grit his teeth, trying to brace himself against the strange feeling of Zim penetrating what he’d always considered to be an exit. As Zim eased in farther, Dib’s body widened and that did bring discomfort as the tender, virgin entrance tried to accommodate the generously endowed Irken Tartling. A whimper escaped Dib’s throat as he received the widest part of Zim’s head.

 

The ruby-eyed Irken froze. “Does it hurt? Should I stop?”

 

Dib opened his eyes and looked up. “A-a little, but no, don’t stop.” He wanted Zim and he knew it would get better, or at least he hoped it would.

 

Zim nodded. “Just relax.” He resumed his advance, easing further until his head slipped inside, the Sweetling gasping again.

 

As the shorter of the two, Zim couldn't reach to kiss his lips, so kissed his chest instead.

 

“Oh, Dib, you feel so good around me. - Is it still ok?”

 

Dib swallowed and nodded. “Y-yeah… It’s a little better now. It’s still weird though.”

 

“I think that was the worst part, now it will only get better.”

 

Dib nodded and reached out to touch Zim’s cheek and Zim took his hand and kissed it, then resumed entering Dib, sliding in halfway, then slowly back out, watching carefully to see if it was hurting his Sweetling.

 

Dib kept his eyes locked on Zim’s as he tried to relax, though it was hard when he was so nervous. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly as Zim eased out, then in again.

 

And out again, stopping at the tip, and then inside again, this time all the way until his pelvis was flush with Dib’s bottom and the Sweetling gasped, feeling more than a little stuffed.

 

“Ohhhh, Dib..!” Zim moaned and kissed Dib’s chest again.

 

“Z-Zim… not too deep!”

 

Zim looked up and eased back a little. “S-sorry… Better?”

 

“Th-that’s better… You just… really large, you know?”

 

Zim giggled a little and nodded. “I know.” He gave Dib a lopsided grin. “Now, relax.”

 

Zim resumed easing out, then back in again, but not so deep this time, and held a steady, slow rhythm and Dib soon laid his head back against the pillows as he began to enjoy it.

 

Zim was right, he realised as he focused on the feel and became aware of the ridges, they were quite a nice sensation, seeming to rub him just right. A moan escaped his lips. “Oh, Zim..!”

 

“Yes, my Dib!” Zim replied and increased his speed a little, thrusting in and out a little faster.

 

Dib couldn't hold the curled position any longer and released his legs, Zim paused in his movements, adjusting a little.

 

“Wrap them around me,” Zim told him and Dib did so, then the ruby-eyed Irken resumed.

 

“Oh! Ah!” Dib gasped, the new position seeming to line them up even better than before and those ridges rubbed more intensely,  _ deliciously, _ and he felt pleasure begin building up inside of him.

 

Zim moved his hands, one slipping around Dib’s waist, the other clinging to his shoulder, and he increased his tempo again. He panted and clung tighter as he thrust, holding Dib firmly in place and drew his tongue over his chest.

 

Dib simply held on, finding Zim’s tempo increases to feel good and he began to arch his hips to receive Zim and ensure that delicious area was well-stimulated.

 

“Z-Zim! It’s so good! Wh-whatever it is it’s - AH Y-yes… There! Feels sooo-” he trailed off to pant, his heart pounding in his ears. The feel of Zim’s skin, naked and smooth, and the sound of his hitching breath, all of it excited him. He opened his eyes and saw Zim was watching him, eyes partially lidded, his gaze intense with ecstasy.

 

The ruby-eyed Irken again increased his temper, thrusting in faster and harder, his pelvis grinding against Dib and making soft, slapping sounds. “Is… this -Ah!--s-still… ok? - OH-OHH!” he asked between gasps.

 

“Y-yeah! It’s g-good!” A moan wrenched forth as Zim hit that spot again and again.

 

Zim reached up with one hand and took hold of an antenna and teased it between his fingers, causing Dib’s breath to catch in his throat. He knew what this would do to him and he squirmed in pleasure, his antennae both twitching.

 

“Z-Ziiiim, I-I-!”

 

“Yes, Dib! CRY FOR ZIM!”

 

Between the thrusts and antennae stimulation, a hot ball had formed in Dib’s groin and he knew it wouldn't take much longer. With just a few more delicious, fast and deep, thrusts - “OH,  _ ZIM!” _ \- his pleasure peaked and he tensed up around Zim, releasing all over their tummies.

 

This did not slow Zim down in the least and he thrust through Dib’s orgasmic flexing, then released Dib’s antenna and placed his hand on his head, clinging to Dib as he again thrust harder.

 

Suddenly, Zim tensed up and shuddered on Dib, and thrust through his orgasm until he had released the last spurt, then collapsed upon Dib, gasping for breath.

 

As Dib lay there beneath his panting lover, he became aware of the feeling of extremely stuffed. The feeling was strange, foreign, and uncomfortable. He hoped it wouldn't get worse.

 

Zim became suddenly very still. “D-Dib, I… I have to warn you, d-don’t try and move…”

 

Dib opened his eyes. “Move?”

 

Zim swallowed, still trying to catch his breath. “I-I forgot this can happen, but we’re… we’re locked together.”

 

Confused, Dib’s eyes snapped open. “Locked together? I don't understand.”

 

“The… the base of my penis has swollen up and we can't separate until it goes back down.” Zim blushed. “I’m sorry, th-this has never actually happened to me before.”

 

Dib, meanwhile, was trying to figure out what he was being told. He remembered something… “Wait, you mean like a male dog? Do you have  _ a knot, _ Zim?”

 

Zim shrugged. “I-I guess? So… don't move or try to pull away from me. It… might hurt you if you do…”

 

Dib sighed and tried to relax, though out of pure curiosity, he tested it by trying to rock his hips away from Zim. “OW!” he gasped, feeling like it would rip him apart and he stopped.

 

“Yes, I  _ tried _ to warn you.”

 

“You did,” he simply admitted, not feeling argumentative, and as long as he didn't move, it wasn't uncomfortable. “And… how long?”

 

Zim gave a sheepish shrug. “As said, I… I’ve never locked with anyone before. I guess a few minutes?”

 

Dib nodded, resigning himself to it. “Well, I guess there are worse things than being tied with you.”

 

Zim smiled, looking very relieved. “Thanks, my Dib. I love you.”

 

Dib reached out and brushed Zim’s cheek. “I love you too.”

 

“And… did you like the sex with Zim?”

 

Dib blushed and nodded. “It was good.”

 

“Just good?”

  
Dib chuckled softly. “It was  _ amazing, _ Zim.”

 

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, this chapter has actually given me like a month of problems. I have NO clue what the heck is wrong with me, but this was SO difficult to write. I've started, trashed, started, trashed, put it on the back burner to finish NaNo and other stuff, then rinse and repeat with trying to write it and rewrite it and realise I had somewhere lost what I wanted to do, then go back and rework it again and find something close to it, and.... And to be honest, I'm not even sure it's GOOD still. I hope it's good. This has literally been THE most DIFFICULT lemon I've ever written (and it is not even my first, nor have my others ever gotten negative reactions... I've gotten lots of compliments for how I write lemons in the past). A big problem, I suppose, is that there are SO many different and excellent ZaDR first time lemons, with so many neat ideas, lots of different takes that each have their own appeal, and mine... I dunno. Then I had to remind myself that MY version of it has to flow with MY take on the characters., and that's the only way I could bring myelf to setlle on this and post it finally: It has to work for MY take on the characters' relationship flow in MY story, and THIS is how it feels right. 
> 
> As said, I hope it was good.
> 
> Also, I have put a LOT of thought into the terms for genetalia in a sex scene, and it basically comes down to that I hate the word 'cock' (also, every time I thought of using, this who joke of Zim asking what 'male chickens have to do with it' and being turned off in his confusion wouldn't stop playing in my head), and everyone else hates the word 'member', which also would be kinda weird and not fitting in this one anyway, I suppose (can't get it out of my head how many people HATE the term in writing groups, so I can't make myself use it). I could have used 'dick' in the narrative, but that also felt wrong, so you get the boring, but straightforward, 'penis'. If that turns you off, sorry.... I really am, but I didn't know what else to do. Nothing else felt right for this.


	28. Chapter 26

# Chapter 26

  


Zim was sitting up as usual when Dib awakened with a yawn.

  
“How are you, my Sweetling?”   
  
Dib stretched and wiped the sleep from his eyes, then pulled himself to a sitting position beside his lover, wincing at his tender backside.   
  
“Sore… I-I can't believe you talked me into doing it again...”

 

“Mmm.” Zim slipped his arm around Dib. “It will pass. Besides, _I_ don't recall it taking much to convince you.”   


It hadn't, he blushed as he recalled making love with Zim not only once but _again_ after the first time, and how much he’d enjoyed it. He had been tired and done after and happy. He hadn't needed much convincing, but… “I wish we hadn't done it,” he murmured in a forlorn tone. Today was a different matter.

  
“Oh, no…” Zim turned to him, antennae raised in surprise and ruby eyes were wide as dinner plates. “Dib? Why??”   
  
Dib turned away from his companion and curled into a ball on his side. “Because now it’ll just hurt that much worse when you... _leave,”_ he said over his shoulder. The morning after was the worst, so everyone said, and he was sure his would be now too, for Zim had everything Dib had ever had to give: His heart _and_ his virginity. There was just no way this wasn't going to go terribly wrong.

  
Zim partially bent over him, placing his bare hands upon the sulking Sweetling, one on his shoulder while the other caressed his head gently. “Why… What makes you think I would _leave_ now?”

  
“Because you said so yourself that you don't like to be stuck in one place.” He remembered that vividly and how could he hope to keep Zim somewhere he didn't want to be? He wouldn't! That’s just not what you did with someone you loved.   
  
“Dib, I… Do you _really_ believe I could actually _go away_ and _leave you_ now??”   
  
Dib’s heart wrenched in his chest and he felt angry at his companion for saying such a thing, instead of just admitting it honestly. “Why not? It happens to lots of people. You _got_ what you wanted, _everything_ you wanted, so why… _why_ should it be any different for _me?”_   
  
“You know, sometimes you can be so self-centered, _Dib,”_ Zim hissed scathingly next to his ear hole.   
  
Dib cringed, losing his battle not to cry as a tear escaped and rolled down his face to the sheet.   


“Do you _really_ think you're the _only one_ who has _feelings_ in this??” Zim went on, either unaware of, or just unconcerned with, Dib’s anguish over the scolding.

  
Dib only shrugged, not knowing what else to say or do and feeling worse by the moment.   
  
“I meant _everything_ I said to you!” Zim’s volume increased, attesting to the height of his smouldering fury. “AND BESIDES,” he snapped. “It’s not like I could leave you even-” his voice broke suddenly. “Even if I’d ever _planned_ to.”   
  
“You… don't owe me anything, Zim. I don't want to keep you in a cage.”   
  
“Ohhh!” the ruby-eyed ex-invader cried, then his anger flared again. “You really just don't get it, do you?!” And before Dib could say anything else, Zim had grabbed him and flipped him over onto his back so he was looking up at him. “You’re _my Pendant,_ Dib! And I’ve been searching for you since… since forever!” Now Zim looked like HE was about to cry with his angry and desperate ruby eyes filling up with tears. “And you _accuse me_ of wanting to leave you RIGHT AFTER I'VE FINALLY _FOUND YOU!?”_ A tear then did escape the large ruby eyes. “Sometimes I really hate you, Dib.” Another tear escaped ruby and trickled down Zim’s green cheek.

  
Dib was literally so startled that he just gaped up at Zim in silence until he could find his voice and put together some semblance of coherent words. “Your… your ‘Pendant’?” Not near as coherent as he'd hoped, but the best he could do.   
  
Zim glanced away, seeming to be toying with something in his mind, then, without a word, reached behind to his PAK and removed something. He hid it in his fist and held it to his chest, head bent down and eyes closed, almost as though praying.

  
“Some… some of us believe we’re… not alone in the universe…” he began quietly, not opening his eyes. “That we have a… like a partner. Someone just for _you,_ meant to walk your path _with you_ for eternity.” Zim inhaled abruptly and more tears began tumbling down his cheeks as he released a shuddering breath. “I-I always believed _I_ had to have one _too,_ because… something’s always just felt off with me and, they say that… each time you find your Pendant it’s like… like finding a lost part of _yourself,_ but in _someone else._ \- I know this doesn't make any sense; it… it doesn't make any sense to most of us either, but it’s _real,_ I _know_ it is _.”_ He wiped his eyes with his free hand and Dib took the moment to sit up. “I can _feel_ it and-and _sense_ it, and… _taste_ it. It’s so tangible I feel like I could just reach out and _touch_ it.”

  
“And… and you think _I’m_ that for _you?”_   


Zim nodded, sniffling, and clutched whatever he was holding even tighter. “It-it’s said that the… Pendants will be drawn to each other, as though by some mysterious and all-powerful force beyond our understanding or reason. - And they don't have to be romantic partners, because it’s up to them what they make of their relationship, so some can be rivals or even _enemies..._ and some can be friends or… _lovers.”_

 

“But I’m not - I mean, _I wasn't_ an Irken before,” Dib finally began as he attempted to process what Zim was trying to tell him. “So I… I don't see how _I_ could be _your_ -”

 

“It doesn't matter, Dib,” Zim broke in firmly. “It’s true that it _usually_ happens between Irkens, but not always. It’s not a rule.”

 

Dib sighed, not sure he was following.

 

“But I didn't think of it either, which is why I didn't realize sooner, I guess; but…” Zim took a deep, shuddering breath. “Really, _why else_ would I come to YOUR planet and YOUR town and YOUR skool??” He held his other hand to his chest, covering the one still holding and hiding his precious item. “This ball of filth and germs has LOTS of miserable cities and horrible skools! So, WHY, of all of them, did I come to _YOURS??_ And why were you _the only one_ who recognised me for what I am: Not a hyooman??! And from the very MOMENT I WALKED INTO YOUR STINKY, SMELLY CLASSROOM!!!” Zim’s pent up emotions finally erupted with a sonic blast and the tears flowed freely down his cheeks, dripping onto his bare chest.

 

“Oh,” Dib replied helplessly. It seemed to make sense to him too, as much as any of it was making sense to him. The nearest he could figure is that Zim obviously believed he was profoundly special to him and when the weight of that realisation hit Dib, smack in the gut, he gave an unwilling sob. “Z-Zim I…” _‘don't know what to say…’_  He lowered his head.

 

Zim seemed to literally curl his body around whatever he was holding, his head bowed so deeply that his chin was touching his hands. “I can't make you do this, Dib;” he finally began, his voice a tremulous whisper. “But I… I can never leave you again either.”

 

“Make me do what?”

 

Zim clutched his precious item even tighter.

 

It took him several long minutes before he finally spoke again, his voice quiet, but tense as though he expected impending and total heartbreak. _“Be my Pendant.”_

 

He held out his hand before Dib and slowly opened his fist. In his palm lay a beautiful charm shaped somewhat like the two-eyed Irken insignia, with two iridescent chains hanging from it. One beautiful ruby-red eye seemed to swirl energetically and glitter vibrantly within its clear capsule, while it’s twin on the left was quiet. Empty. Dark. _Soulless._

 

“It-it has to be a choice,” Zim said, looking up to him. “If you don't actively choose it and me, then it _won't-_ it won't _work.”_

 

Then, as Dib watched, Zim took the pendant in both hands and, gritting his teeth as though straining, busted it _right in half!_ Dib gasped, but Zim calmly held one in each hand.

 

“One half is for me.” He closed his hand over the red-eyed piece. “And one half is for you.” He held the vacant-eyed one out to Dib. He looked up, his expression open, no signs of pressure or urgency, certainly some hopefulness, but primarily patience and invitation. “You don't have to accept it, Dib; but if you do, just put it on and then it will activate for you and then we… we put them together.” Zim’s voice was now so thick with emotion that he had trouble speaking. “It will check if we…” His voice broke and he swallowed, cleared his throat, and swallowed again. “If we _are_ a-actually Pendants; it will… it will..!” His throat constricted and this time he fell silent, giving Dib an apologetic look. The ex-invader lowered his head, closed his eyes, and offered the pendant to Dib again.

 

Dib slowly reached out, hesitating for a moment as though afraid that the Irken insignia might jump up and bite him! His hand shook and he glanced to Zim, who now appeared to be weeping silently, or terrified, his shoulders trembling, then Dib looked back to the offered pendant. - And grabbed it quickly!

 

“The choice is _yours,_ Dib,” Zim whispered without looking at him, for it was the only way he could speak. “I won't ask you to do this, if you don't want to.”

 

As he held the charm, surprisingly ice cold against his bare skin, doubt came over him. “Is… is this like a marriage? Would this mean we’d _be_ _married_ according to your culture and laws?”

 

“Married?” Zim repeated, finally looking up. “...No.” He looked back down, resuming his former position. “We don't even need to tell anyone, most Pendants don't. It’s only between us, and it signifies our acceptance and wish to acknowledge the profound and unbreakable bond you and I share. But it’s not marriage. We can’t ‘divorce’ from this, but it also does not _bind_ us legally or emotionally or otherwise. We don't have to stay _lovers._ If we go back to being enemies, then we will just be enemy Pendants.” Zim took a deep breath and whispered even quieter. “It’s your choice. And… I-I’ll always love you no matter what you decide.” He held his half of the pendant tightly to his chest again.

 

“I-I just have to put it on?”

 

“Uh-huh,” Zim hummed softly.

 

Dib took hold of the chain and looked at it, but couldn't find a way to open it. “Zim, how do I put it on? It’s too small to go over my… my _head.”_ He sighed at that. Even in astral planes above and beyond the universe, his ’big head’ was a damn joke!

 

Zim looked up. “D-do you want _me_ to put it on you?”

 

“Why do you look like you’d just _love_ that?” Dib couldn't help smiling. “Go ahead, Zim. Please.” He held it out to him.

 

Zim smiled and wiped his eyes and cheeks, then first put his own on by simply pulling it over his head and the chain seemed to stretch or rather flow down. Then he reverently took the one Dib was holding out to him and moved in close. Standing up on his knees in front of Dib, he slipped it over the Sweetling’s head and to his neck where Zim carefully smoothed down the chain and made sure it hung correctly.

 

“In a moment, it should-”

 

The eye suddenly flashed, blinding, and Dib gasped at the strange sensation that felt like it was melding to his very soul and life force. He couldn't describe it as painful or even draining, but it was very, _very_ strange. Foreign. _Alien._

 

“- Yeah, that,” Zim finished. “And now that pendant belongs to you and _only_ you, my Dib.”

 

Dib opened his eyes and looked down, then picked up his new pendant to look at it. It was now warm and the once-dark eye was now swirling and glittering just like Zim’s, but in _amber._

 

“Oh! It uses our eye-colour?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Neat! So,” he began and looked up to Zim. “Does this mean we’re… _Pendants_ now?”

 

“It hasn't acknowledged us as such yet.”

 

“Oh. And how do we do that?”

 

“Does that mean you want to?”

 

“Y-yeah. I do. So..?”

 

Zim smiled, beamed even, then took a deep, shuddering breath. “Ok… Y-you have to hold it to your heart, close your eyes and think of me, then let your mind tell it you’re ready to acknowledge _me_ as your Pendant. A-and I’ll do the same. - R-ready?”

 

Dib nodded.

 

“Ok. Then…  now!”

 

They closed their eyes and held them to their chests over their hearts. Both saying their silent wish.

 

“If it’s ready…?” Zim began after a minute and Dib looked up. Their eyes met. “W-we put them together…” Zim held his half up. “T-they’ll check to see if we’re actually connected or not.” He looked fretful.

 

“Is there any chance we wouldn't be? After everything you’ve said?”

 

“Y-yeah…” He gulped, fixing Dib with his worried, nay _fearful_ gaze.

 

“Let’s do it,” Dib said. _“Now._ So we know.”

 

Zim nodded and gulped again, Dib mirroring the action, then they held the two halves up and, looking into each other's eyes, ruby meeting amber, pressed them together until they heard a click.

 

“OH!” both cried out, dropping the now whole pendant as it lit up bright like a bi-coloured searchlight, and amber and ruby swirled together, pulsing and glittering wildly. Dancing! Rejoicing! _Binding!_

 

Zim’s face broke out in a huge and awe-filled smile. “W-we’re…”

 

 _“Pendants!”_ they cried in unison, and Zim threw his arms around Dib, squeezing him so tightly the combined pendant poked their naked chests painfully, but neither cared and Dib wrapped his arms around Zim, squeezing him back just as hard.

 

Both Pendants were butt-naked, but neither cared nor paid any attention to that fact (yet), both as joyous as little kids, hugging and kissing and hugging tighter.

 

“I’ve found you at last, my Pendant,” Zim whispered against Dib’s neck.

 

***

 

Zim was the first out of bed a couple hours later, he gave his lover a tender kiss before he stood up and stretched and then sought out some cleansing chalk. He started cleaning himself and Dib blushed at the unashamed and gratifying view Zim gave him while rubbing the chalk slowly and sensually over his bare skin.

 

Dib self-consciously pulled the sheets up to his chin and Zim smirked at him. Not the slightest bit daunted, the ruby-eyed Irken turned himself slowly to display more of his body as he continued, occasionally peering over his shoulder.

 

Watching in rather awestruck wonder despite himself, Dib soon decided to get up as well and join Zim, eager to clean himself of sweat and sticky bodily substances, specifically where he’d messed all over his tummy.

 

Once he was on his feet and had started to stretch, he felt something warm begin to trickle down his legs. He glanced down, then froze when he realised what it was and his near-panicked gaze snapped to his companion.  _ When had Zim last applied the preservative?? _ He could only remember Zim doing so once, before their first time.

 

“Dib?” The ruby-eyed Irken approached him, reaching out to take his hand. “What’s wrong?”

 

As soon as he felt the touch, Dib sharply yanked his hand away and glared accusingly.  _ “ZIM, _ did you get me  _ pregnant?!” _ he demanded, the sick feeling of betrayal causing his temper to flare.

 

Zim blinked and his eyes widened. “Huh? Pregnant? No… why would you think that?”

 

“Because -  _ LOOK!” _ He gestured wildly between his legs. “That-that’s yours,  _ isn't it??” _

 

Zim glanced down and licked his lips. “Mm, yes, it is.”

 

Taken aback by the unabashed admission, Dib glared scathingly at him. “How could you  _ do _ this to me?! You  _ promised me _ you wouldn't take any risks if we..!” His voice broke. “If we had sex!”

 

“Risks? But, I didn't-”

 

Dib grabbed his shoulders and shook him. “Your cum is dripping down my legs!”

 

Zim cocked his head. “Yes, so?”

 

“You  _ promised _ me, Zim!” he cried, feeling his throat start to tighten. “You promised me you wouldn't give me any smeets!”

 

“But, I-I  _ didn't _ give you any smeets.”

 

“You came inside me! H-how do you  _ think _ smeets are made?!”

 

Zim narrowed an eye. “Dib, have you forgotten everything they taught in our skool’s sex education class? Because it is very much the same for Irkens, even males.”

 

“Yes! Unprotected sex causes babies!”

 

“Exactly.  _ Unprotected. _ My sperma must find and permeate at least one of your ova for fertilisation to occur,” Zim explained calmly. “And none of them have, because I have been using the preservative.” In all this, Dib had not let go of his arms, nor had Zim protested in any way.

 

“Then why is it running down my legs? Huh? Obviously your Irken condom  _ isn't _ working.”

 

Blinking, Zim gave him a baffled look. “Condom? I didn't use a condom; we don't even  _ have _ condoms. No, no, the preservative is much safer and good for twenty-four hours after application.”

 

“But-but-but your sperm was  _ inside me!” _

 

Zim shook his head. “It has been destroyed upon contact with the preservative.”

 

“Destroyed? What do you mean?”

 

Again Zim shook his head. “It just destroys all sperma.” He scratched his chin. “But only Irken sperma. Tests on Vortians and a few other species always proved unsuccessful,” he finished with a shrug.

 

“Oh…” Dib couldn't help the confused tone after Zim blasted him with so much information that he was trying to catch up with. “What about sexual diseases?”

 

“Irkens don't have any and there's never been any known cases of us contracting them from other species. It’s the healing factor,” he said proudly, then reached up and caressed Dib’s cheek. “You'll be fine. If there had been any risk of me making you sick, I wouldn't have, uh… ‘made love with you’?”

 

“To me,” Dib corrected, his voice much quieter now that his earlier horror was wearing off. “Y-you really wouldn't have? E-even for sex?”

 

“Dib, I may have been found ‘defective’ by the Control Brains, but I’m not actually completely irresponsible.” He caressed over Dib’s lips. “I don't want to make you sick or make you carry my smeets or  _ anything else _ that is either bad for you or unwanted. - You're my boyfriend and my Pendant, my Dib, and I want you to be happy and healthy.”

 

Now feeling overcome by the words, Dib sniffled, then wrapped his arms tightly around Zim, squeezing him and burying his eyes against the naked shoulder. “T-thanks…” he whispered, no longer trusting his voice.

 

“Of course,” Zim murmured as he returned the embrace. “I almost can't believe you'd think any less of me, but I guess after all those things I did to you when we were younger… I deserve your distrust.”

 

“Look, I’m  _ sorry, _ ok? I-I just didn't know how your contraceptive worked and when I saw your  _ cum _ dripping out of me, I thought…”

 

“It’s ok. - But now...” He pulled away so he could look at Dib. “Let’s clean you up and put some clothing on you so you don't freeze, then I’ll feed you, my Sweetling.”

 

Dib just nodded, food sounded really, really good right then, and he released Zim, then took the offered Cleansing Chalk and scrubbed himself with it. Once freed of sweat and other bodily fluids, he turned to his bag to find a pair of underwear and pyjamas, which he pulled on. As usual, his ruby-eyed companion chose his uniform.

 

***

 

Some time later, after both had eaten their fill and emptied their bladders via what reminded Dib of a glorified urinal that had come out of the wall of the tent when Zim touched a panel, Dib had settled on the sleeping bag and was holding his pendant half, turning it between his fingers as he inspected it. He liked how the eye glowed amber, he decided. “How does this thing work?”

 

Zim settled in beside him and looked over at it, then shrugged. “I don't know.” He picked up his own and drew his finger over it, then pressed the eye and it changed to amber, pulsing in a rhythm. “My Dib is alive.”

 

“I am? I mean, of course I am!” Dib shook his head at his folly. “But what’s that?”

 

“It can do a number of things, but this signifies your heartbeat. Yours can too, just give the eye a soft press.”

 

Dib complied and his pendant’s eye changed to ruby, also pulsing in rhythm. “Hm, so we can see each other’s heartbeat?”

 

“Uh-huh.”

 

“And… if one of us dies or something?”

 

“It won’t beat anymore,” Zim answered solemnly. “Anyway, if we are ever separated, no matter how far apart, we can always check to see if the other is alive.”

 

“Huh.” Dib really couldn't decide if that was creepy or cool. Both, he decided. As he watched it, it reverted to it’s previous amber colour.

 

“My Dib, your Pendant, the amazing Zim, is here. Always.”

 

Dib glanced over to his companion, cocking his head in curiosity as Zim spoke, holding the still amber-eyed charm near his mouth as though speaking to it instead of the Sweetling sitting right next to him. Zim’s pendant changed back to ruby a moment later and the ex-invader turned to him.

 

“Now just… touch it and will it play that back.”

 

Intrigued, but confused, Dib looked down and pressed it as he had before. Not even a second passed and a translucent image of Zim, ruby eyes twinkling, popped up and repeated the line Zim had just moments ago.

 

Dib cocked his head. “So… you can leave voice messages?”

 

Zim nodded. “You can too. Do what I showed you before, but this time keep your finger on the eye when it shows mine, and say whatever you want.”

 

“Hm, ok,” Dib replied and did exactly as he was told, then hesitated, not sure what to say. “Uh, hi, Zim. It-it’s me and, uh, if this works like you said, I just want you to know that I love you.” He let it go and exhaled, blushing and feeling silly. He turned to Zim. “Was that stupid?”

 

Zim, however, was turned to his pendant, focused on it, and, after a moment, he smiled and held it to his heart, then turned to Dib. “It worked, and… thank you.”

 

“It did? But I didn't see anything. Or even  _ hear _ anything.”

 

“I couldn't see yours either,” Zim replied and shrugged. “I guess only the person it’s intended for can. Makes sense. As I told you, Pendants are personal and private things.”

 

“Huh.” Then Dib held it to his heart, smiling to himself. It felt good to be so connected to someone - no, not  _ someone, _ he corrected himself, to  _ Zim. _ Once his greatest enemy, now his lover and best friend. Sighing happily, he snuggled up to his ruby-eyed companion and Zim wrapped his arm around Dib and squeezed.

  
  
  


***

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is short, because reasons. This scene belongs for itself. I actually had written it way before I even got to this point, (was inspired and knew I wanted to do this pretty much when I'd started the story), and it just worked out so well and I just love it.
> 
> Zim makes the random nod to this in previous chapters, actually. I've been dying to share it!
> 
> EDIT: So, I lied. Actually, it was because while setting up the other chapters to be shared, I had discovered that there was more that belonged in this chapter. Eh, let's just leave it at that I made a mistake about what all belongs to this scene when I was originally posting it.


	29. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, first, sorry that this chapter is a day later than intended. I expected to get it finished on Sunday, but turns out I had an appointment on Sunday that I found out about on Saturday morning and after the (all day) appointment, I was just too tired. Anyway, my apologies for that. Here it is though!
> 
> Oh yes, and in case you only read the previous chapter when it was first posted, then you should probably go back and read it again because I added content to it that I had forgotten to when posting.

#  Chapter 27

  
  


“Wait here, my Sweetling,” Zim purred, giving him a kiss, then turning and heading off.

 

Dib sat down on a bench outside to catch a little fresh air as he waited for Zim to return from whatever he was up to. He rested his elbows on his knees and placed his head boredly in his hands, feeling a mix of weary from the trip in the small Voot Runner and…  _ lost _ without his new lover.  He sighed and kicked at a dried leaf that had fallen near his feet. He  _ wanted _ Zim. To be near him, to be within reach of him, to have his reassurance that everything would be fine.

 

“Waiting for your love to return too?” a feminine voice suddenly spoke up beside him, interrupting yet another impatient sigh, and he looked over to see a rather pretty woman, with long brown hair flowing about her face like a supermodel and done into a silver tiara on her head, her perfectly done makeup added to the impression. She also wore a long, frilly white dress. All-in-all, he found the whole image quite baffling.

 

“Um…” he stammered unsure of what to say.

 

“I’m waiting for my husband,” she continued, her voice warm and… dreamy, he decided. “We just got married and he’s checking into a hotel where we can stay for our wedding night before continuing on our honeymoon.”

 

“Oh.” She was supposed to be a  _ bride, _ that explained her attire, he supposed. “That’s nice, I guess.” He really had no idea what else to say, and his antennae had started to itch under the wig.

 

“And yours?” Before he could speak, however, she stood up. “Oh! There he is! - Nath!” she called and waved.

 

Dib glanced in the direction she was looking, but didn't see anyone except for the concierge waiting at the door. He looked around at the people walking along the sidewalk, but none appeared to be looking at her. He shrugged and rested his chin in his hand again. Under his wig, his antennae itched.

 

“Nath! And did they have a vacant room? - Oh, great!”

 

Neither seeing nor hearing anyone still, Dib sighed and tuned her out. Now he was convinced she’d probably escaped a mental hospital or something. He chose to just watch the direction where his boyfriend had disappeared while toying with whether he could get away with slipping a finger under his wig to scratch at one of his irritated antennae.

 

“Excuse me, young man?” she broke into his thoughts again. “I was just telling Nath about you and wanted to introduce you.” When Dib looked up, she gestured to him. “Nath, this is my new friend, uh… what was your name again?” She chuckled apologetically.

 

“Dib,” he mumbled, before he could catch himself, then shook his head, making a face at himself for his slip. The last thing a crazy lady needed to know was his  _ name! _

 

“Dib! I’m Candy and this is Nath, well, it’s short for Nathaniel, but I just call him Nath, or Nathy.”

 

Dib pursed his brows and looked around pointedly. “Where? I don't see anyone.”

 

“My husband, Nath!” She giggled warmly, then slapped her head as though remembering something and laughed. “Oh, silly me, of course you probably can't see him! I mean, he is a  _ ghost, _ after all!”

 

Dib raised his head and gawked at her. “Y-you think you’re married to a ghost?”  _ Oh, why him? _ While he certainly knew ghosts were real, he also knew they did  _ not _ marry the living, nor did priests marry the living with the deceased.

 

“Yes!” she squeaked happily.

 

“I’m… happy for you,” he said, deciding it was safer not to further argue with her and returned to his previous position.

 

“Thank you! And your boyfriend? He wasn't a ghost, but there was definitely something unusual about him.”

 

“An  _ alien, _ what else,” he deadpanned with a shrug and more snark to his voice than he probably should have.

 

“An alien?” she sounded just as disbelieving as he felt about her own claim. “Oh, you think so, Nath? - Huh. - If you say so, Honey.”

 

Dib looked up, eyes half-lidded. “I take it  _ Nath _ believes me?”

 

“Uh-huh,” she affirmed, her tone honest and serious. “He says there’ve been aliens among us for hundreds of years.”

 

“Oh, well,  _ mine _ is only one-hundred and sixty.”

 

She giggled. “Nath is thousands of years old.”

 

_ ‘Of course he is’, _ Dib thought, but didn't voice it, instead he only gave a sigh, then he raised his head as he caught sight of Zim approaching.

 

At two metres before them, the disguised ex-invader stopped and closed his eyes. He opened them, blinked a couple times, then closed them again. He repeated it twice more and each time he opened them, he appeared to Dib to be concentrating.

 

With a last series of blinks, he turned his attention back to Dib and approached, eyes narrowed as he did so. “I see you have been making  _ friends _ while I was gone.” The ex-invader placed his hands on his hips; he was clutching a brown bag in his left.

 

Dib shrugged. “Candy and, uh… Nath, her husband.” He gestured to Candy, then off somewhere to the right side of her where he guessed ‘Nathaniel’ should've been standing.

 

_ “Nath’anieliaz’orr,” _ Zim pronounced coldly, the name broken up with sharp clicks of his tongue, and looked to the opposite side of Candy from where Dib had indicated. He closed the distance between them and placed his hand on Dib’s shoulder. “Listen here, you little leech, this is  _ my _ planet,” he hissed at the space to the left of the human woman. “And this is  _ my _ Sweetling.”

 

Finding that incredibly strange, Dib looked up at his boyfriend. “Zim?”

 

Ignoring him, Zim pointed to the air. “I do not  _ care _ what you are doing here! If you get in my way, you will be in direct violation of the treaty with the mighty Irken Empire. Need I remind you what happened  _ last time _ your people crossed us?” Zim quieted, but his harsh and intent focus remained fixed on the spot near Candy’s shoulders. He looked over to Candy, then relaxed and waved a dismissive hand. “Yes, yes, you can have  _ that _ hyooman.”

 

“Wait, you mean Nath is _real??”_ Dib blurted out quickly before Zim could ignore him again.

 

“Of course he is!” Zim growled, then shook his head. “Did you think he was a ghost or something?”

 

Dib glared back at him. “Yes, actually. So does Candy.”

 

“That’s what they  _ want _ you to think,” Zim grumbled, still glaring at Nath. “This way they can pass off living on their chosen Planets easier.”

 

Candy, in the meantime, had listened to the whole thing in stunned silence. “Nathaniel, you’re from…  _ out there? _ ?”

 

“That’s right, inferior hyooman,” Zim said as though speaking to a least-favourite student. “You have pledged the rest of your life to be the mate of an alien and at precisely 11:52 tonight, it will be sealed.” He looked back to the space Nath was apparently occupying and raised his hands.  _ “Congratulations.” _

 

Candy looked nervously to the side of her for a moment, then looked back at Zim and smiled. “Thank you.” Then both she and Zim looked to Nath, her eyes wide as she listened and Zim’s eyes narrowed to slits. “Oh, that’s a great idea!” she suddenly exclaimed, then turned to them pleadingly. “Oh, would you two, please?”

 

Zim glared, shaking his head, then stopped and sighed, turning to Dib. “He has invited us to have _dinner_ with them,” he began explaining, though looking as though the words tasted bitter on his tongue. “Their treat.”

 

“I don't know…” In fact, Dib was already anticipating when they could go on their separate way and bid the two good riddance. “I’d rather not…”

 

Zim clicked his tongue. “I am afraid to say, Nath’anieliaz’orr, that you will simply have to owe me a favour for the future, as we must be on our way.” He took Dib’s arm and urged him to stand up, then escorted his Pendant away.

 

Once Dib had fallen in stride with Zim and they’d put some distance between themselves and the other paranormal paramores, he squeezed Zim’s hand. “So… Nath is some type of alien? What kind? And why can't I see him and how come you  _ can?” _

 

“Yes, their true name is…” He made a few clicks with his tongue along with other sounds in his throat, then shook his head. “...Unpronounceable, even for Irken vocal chords, so they are designated as S-six-three-six DF-zero-four-two-zero; and I can see him because, as an invader, I have ocular implants that you don't. I just have to adjust them to their dimensional frequence.”

 

At that, Dib stopped in his tracks. “What?? ‘Their  _ dimensional frequence’? _ You mean they’re not dead or something, they just… just…”

 

“Aren't living fully in our dimension, yes,” Zim finished for him.

 

“And, and… and they  _ still _ have relationships with…  _ humans?” _

 

“Their dimension contains only them and, for some reason, they cannot breed with each other, but they can interbreed with other species.”

 

Dib considered this for a moment. “So, he’s going to try and get Candy pregnant?”

 

Zim shrugged. “Or be impregnated by her depending which of them is better able to bear the offspring. Usually that means the  _ other _ species gets the  _ honour.” _ This was said with such loathing that Dib blinked.

 

“And you don't like them for some reason?”

 

Zim stopped and looked to the sky for a few moments, his expression dark.  _ “We _ encountered them by accident hundreds of your centuries ago during a conquest of ours. One of the planets we sent our invaders to was  _ infested _ by them.

 

“When they discovered that not only can we pick up their vibrations with our antennae, but also that matings between our species, especially with our Sweetlings, had a very high success rate and would produce multiple offspring  _ despite _ our infertility, they began abducting and forcing us to carry their offspring.”

 

“You mean they  _ raped _ them?!” Dib cried, gaping at Zim in horror and now his boyfriend’s earlier attitude towards Nath made complete sense to him. Then a horrible realisation hit him and, feeling as though his blood had suddenly turned to ice in his veins, he shivered, then grabbed Zim’s shoulders. “Sweetlings?? W-was he going to try and… and force breed with  _ me??” _

 

_ “We were dying out, Zim’s Receptive; but  _ I _ never forced  _ anyone _ to bear my children, nor would I start with you.” _

 

At the sound of a decidedly masculine, but whispery voice that didn't quite seem to reach his ears, Dib jumped out of his skin, nearly losing his wig and spun around, then around again as he tried to locate the source.

 

The intensity with which his antennae were now itching was bordering on unbearable and, as he straightened his wig back into place, couldn't help discreetly rubbing it against them in the hopes of even slight relief before he set it in place.

 

Beside him, Zim had folded his arms and was glaring, teeth bared, at the air before them.

 

“Once we figured out how to set up a defense and establish communications with them,” Zim continued on, his voice dripping with spite. “We were able to put a  _ stop _ to their  _ horrid violation.” _

 

_ “The Irkens nearly wiped us out again.” _

 

“Only a few who’d bonded with  _ willing _ individuals were  _ spared,” _ Zim agreed, though his disgust was tangible.

 

_ “I stayed with my beloved Irken receptive until their passing and then I moved with others of my kind here to Earth. - I _ _  neither want to breed with your receptive, nor cause either of you alarm. I just want to settle down with Candy, for she is a very special homosapien and somehow has the ability to sense my presence and hear me.” _

 

Dib cocked his head while Zim’s glare never wavered.

 

“Just stay out of my way, Nath’anieliaz’orr,” Zim hissed.

 

_ “As you wish.” _

 

With that, Zim turned on his heel and, with Dib in tow, they resumed their walk back to the Voot Runner.

 

Once settled inside and Zim had closed the top, Dib yanked his wig off and began rubbing furiously at his antennae, doing his best not to accidentally hurt them with his sharp claws whilst. “God, the itching!”

 

Zim watched him somberly. “Yes, they have that effect.” He removed his own wig and rubbed his antennae for a moment, though with decidedly less vigor than Dib.

 

Once his antennae had settled, Dib exhaled. “The wigs? Are we allergic?”

 

“Nath’anieliaz’orr caused it. I’ve heard that if they’re mad at you, it feels like they’re burning, but all my encounters with them have just been  _ annoying.” _

 

Dib pulled on his itchy antennae stalks, then waved them. “So, these things react to their emotions?”

 

Zim shrugged. “I’ve also heard that if they want to  _ mate with you, _ it can be a… -” Zim’s face puckered in disgust. “-  _ sensuous tingle, _ as though your entire antennae are being  _ sucked on.” _ Then he turned to Dib, one eye wide in question, the other narrowed in suspicion. “He didn't make you feel  _ that, _ did he?”

 

“No, they just itch and it got like ten times  _ worse _ when he started ‘talking’ to me.”

 

“Good. Otherwise I would go back and  _ kill him _ right now.” Zim started the engine and engaged their safety fields.

 

Dib sighed at that, but didn't see that he’d actually want to stop his companion in this case. Nath had made him feel more than just a little uncomfortable and what Zim had revealed about Nath’s species, he also found him frightening.

 

“Anyway… How come I could hear him later, but not before?”

 

“The more energy he draws from Candy, the more he can project himself into our dimension. It takes a lot of energy, so they tend not to waste it. Apparently, he decided it was important for you to hear his defense from him. - He knows he couldn't have counted on  _ my help.” _

 

“Will he kill her over time?” Dib asked, suddenly worried even though he hadn't especially liked her either.

 

“He could, but more likely he will extend her life. While he takes some energy, he also gives another kind of energy back.” Zim paused for a moment before he continued and, when he did, his hiss was full of venom. “It’s not  _ wise _ to kill your  _ breeding stock, _ you see.”

 

By now, Zim had piloted them from their parking place and into traffic, and Dib tugged his collar up as another chill ran up his back at Zim’s words, watching as they navigated their way towards the freeway. Even if it was technically good news for Candy, nothing about Nath made the Sweetling feel okay after what he’d heard.

 

He was stirred from his musings by the paper bag being deposited into his lap and blinked as he instinctually took hold of it.

 

“There are two hot chocolates and our lunch,” Zim murmured, pressing a button and pulling up the navigator. “Give me one.”

 

Dib reached in and, careful of the hot paper cups, took the two drinks out and handed one to his companion, then took a sip of the hot liquid himself. It was good and he immediately began to relax.

 

Once they’d hit the freeway, Zim flipped on the autopilot and settled back, nursing his drink as well.

 

“We will continue on to Nevada today,” Zim began after a few minutes and drinks of the chocolate. “Then we will stay the night in a hotel and, tomorrow morning, we will head to our final destination, yes?”

 

Dib took a sip and nodded. “Yeah, that’s ok. Just as long as we don't spend another week  _ trapped _ again… We’ve had a  _ great _ track record so far…”

 

“As long as you behave yourself,” Zim smirked at him. “Anyway, those were all for good reasons, but I also hope not to get stuck again. In fact, I think I would have to _ destroy it.” _

 

Dib chuckled, for he shared Zim’s sentiments. Getting trapped somewhere again was the last thing he wanted.

  
  


***

  
  


Later that night in the comfortable hotel room Zim had selected, the two were sitting up in bed.

 

“Hmm,” Zim murmured thoughtfully, drawing back from where he’d been kissing Dib’s neck while the Sweetling was reading a magazine. “You don't seem to be into it.” He released the collar of Dib’s pyjama shirt.

 

Dib shrugged. “I don't know…” he replied distractedly for he wasn't even sure what Zim was talking about.

 

“You do remember that you can just say ‘no’ if you don't want to have sex with Zim.”

 

Again Dib shrugged and set his magazine aside as he took a moment to consider it. “I don't really mind it, I guess; so… if you want it, we can.” If he was honest, he hadn't quite picked up on what Zim was doing. Sure, he knew Zim had been trying to neck with him, but that  _ sex _ had been his boyfriend's ultimate goal, he had not grasped; and now he felt awkward, too.

 

Zim sat back on his knees and put his hands on his hips. “You’re not supposed to do something just because I want it, you know.”

 

Dib looked over at him, his face was getting hot. “I dunno… aren't I? I mean, we’re boyfriends now, which means taking care of you is part of the deal.” Then he gave what he hoped was a reassuring smile. “Look, I really don't mind if we have sex tonight. I just don't… feel like I  _ need _ it, but I’ll still gladly do it for you.”

 

Zim smiled and leaned in for a soft kiss. “I love you, my Dib; and…” He cocked his head cutely. “Zim is a Tartling who is tarting, so… yes, Zim would like to have the Dib tonight.”

 

“Then let’s go ahead and do it,” Dib said, trying not to blush worse. “I’ll enjoy it anyway.”

 

Zim nodded, then slipped his arms around Dib and kissed him. He ran his arms up along the Sweetling’s sides, then farther up over his PAK and on up to his head, stopping at the base of Dib’s antennae. Dib tilted his head and antennae forward as an invitation, and Zim began to caress their lengths.

 

Dib shivered. “Ziiiim,” he moaned and closed his fists on the covers.

 

“Mmm, I love doing this to you,” Zim purred as he leaned forward and pressed his forehead against Dib’s.

 

A moment later, Dib felt Zim’s antennae brush along his own. He swallowed hard, feeling heat rush to his groin. “Ohhhh, Ziiim…” He found the touch of Zim’s antennae against his to be a new and interesting sensation. Less intense than his mouth or fingers, but still very intimate.

 

Zim continued to caress the base of the stocks, teasing them between his fingers, as he brushed with his antennae.

 

Dib enjoyed it for a couple moments, then pulled away. Zim looked at him questioningly, but let him as he tried to catch his breath.

 

“Sorry, I…” Dib forced between breaths. “I want to… do that to  _ you… _ if-if you’ll let me.”

 

"You want to play with Zim's antennae?"

 

Had that been disbelief he'd heard in his Pendant's tone, he wondered? "Yes. If you don't mind?" he answered, biting his lip.

 

Zim smiled. “Of course not, my Dib.” He crawled into Dib’s lap and laid back against him, resting his head against his chest and waggled his antennae invitingly.

 

Excited for the opportunity, both to inspect Zim’s and to see if he actually could pleasure the ruby-eyed Irken the way he’d been pleasured so many times before, he reached up and took the tips between his fingers. “But… you have to tell me if I’m doing it right, ok? Or wrong…”

 

“Mm?”

 

“I don't want to hurt you…”

 

“Oh, Dib… do not worry so much,” Zim murmured softly and clasped his fingers together on his tummy. “Just… do what felt good to you.”

 

Dib gulped. “I-I don't… really remember what you did… I was kind of always, you know…” _...Distracted by how it made him feel._

 

“Then just try  _ something,” _ Zim said airily. “I will let you know if I like it.”

 

“Ok.” He began to caress the flat, scythe-shaped ends. “They’re so smooth and... kinda feathery,” he couldn't help commenting, and they felt delicate between his fingers as he rubbed back and forth, but he didn't add that, instead opting to concentrate on his actions. He moved to where they curved sharply and caressed the corners.

 

Zim gave no reaction and when he peered at his face, he saw the ruby eyes were closed and Zim’s expression was peaceful. Dib wrinkled his brow. “You-you’re not about to _fall asleep,_ are you?”

 

Zim smirked and and snickered softly.

 

“Zim!” Dib whined when he received no further response from his boyfriend. "Come on! If this is just going to make you fall asleep, then-"

 

“Dib-Sweetling?” Zim interrupted in a soft tone. “I love you, but _be quiet_ and... suck one or something.”

 

Taken slightly aback at the demand, Dib closed his mouth. However, he didn't feel as upset as he probably should have. He knew he could talk too much at times. Instead he resumed, because he really wanted to see if he could pleasure his boyfriend. He slowly slid his fingers down the velvety stalks. When he reached the base, Zim exhaled softly. Dib slid his fingers back up, this direction made them feel smoother, though Dib was familiar with that from his own already. He slid along the corners to the ends, where he caressed by rubbing his fingers back and forth. He felt Zim squirm just a little and he smiled, feeling emboldened.

 

He stroked down the stalks again, as that had seemed to get him the best response, then back to the ends. He repeated the motion a few times, watching and listening to Zim intently so he wouldn't miss any response. When he paused at the bases, the antennae flicked, causing them to rub against Dib’s fingers and Zim’s breath hitched a little. At that, Dib tried massaging the base where they connected to Zim’s head and the ruby-eyed Irken exhaled a soft moan.

 

“Oh, is this… what you like?”

 

“Keep it up and see,” Zim nearly purred.

 

Dib sighed, wishing Zim would just tell him straight out, but did as was suggested and decided to try moving his fingers back and forth, then up and down, wondering if Zim prefered one motion over the other. Zim squirmed at both and opened his mouth, the rise and fall of his bare chest quickened, but neither seemed to get more of a response than the other. 

 

Dib then stroked to the tips again and back down.

 

“I-I think I like… what you did at the bottom…” Zim said between breaths.

 

Dib paused and leaned forward to look at his boyfriend. “You…  _ think?” _

 

Zim nodded. “Yeah… it-it felt the best so far.”

 

Dib narrowed his eyes. “How come you sound like you didn't know?”

 

“Because I didn't, of course,” Zim answered matter-of-factly.

 

Dib chewed on his lip, but knew he couldn't avoid asking. “But, how? I mean, you  _ had _ a boyfriend… and you had  _ sex _ with him.”

 

As expected, Zim’s eyes snapped open and he shot Dib an upside-down glare. “Dib,” he began in a warning tone.

 

“Look, I know you don't like talking about him!” Dib said quickly. “But just tell me… didn’t he ever do this to you? And I won't ask anything else about him.”   
  


Zim held the glare for a moment longer, then his expression softened and he appeared to surrender. “This is the first time someone’s... _ever_ played with Zim’s. He was taller and… did not believe he needed to do any special favours for Zim.” Then he sighed and added in a small voice, "it is not like it's hard to turn on a Tartling anyway..."   
  


Dib blinked, unsure whether he was more thrilled to be the first, or sad that Zim's boyfriend never had. “I’m sorry. Anyway, well, it… it’s really good. - Well, when you’ve done it to me.” He only barely managed to catch himself from mentioning that Zim’s obviously had practice doing it, for he didn't want to ruin the mood any more than he already had.   
  


Zim smirked. “I know. - Did... you want to to continue then?” He flicked his antennae invitingly.

 

“Absolutely,” Dib replied and resumed teasing the bases between his fingers. “Like this, right?” He tried to sound sexy by breathing the words.

 

“Mmm-hmm…” Zim sighed and closed his eyes again.

 

This time, Dib focused his attention primarily on the base where Zim had said he’d liked it most and dared to squeeze a little harder.

 

“Ohhh, Diiib,” Zim breathed, his antennae twitching against his boyfriend’s fingers.

 

Dib smiled and curled his pointer finger around them a little, bracing them as he massaged more intensely with his thumbs. A look at Zim’s face and he saw the ruby-eyed Irken’s mouth was, again, open and now the tip of his tongue was hanging out.

 

Then he turned his gaze to the two twitching tips waving in front of his face and he angled one stalk closer so the flat end brushed against his lips. Curious, he breathed lightly on it and it danced before him. He contemplated if he should… Well, Zim  _ had _ told him to suck on one earlier, hadn't he. So Dib opened his mouth and caught the tip between his lips.

 

Zim squirmed against him, his back rubbing firmly against Dib’s crotch and PAK pressing into his gut in the position and Dib blushed, feeling self-conscious. Would Zim be upset that he wasn't hard? Of course, had he been, he’d have worried that Zim would be upset about that too. He pushed the thought away and gently suckled the antenna deeper into his mouth so he could run his tongue along the tip.

 

“Ahhhh…” Zim said in a shuddering breath.

 

“Mmm?,” Dib hummed in question.

 

“Oh!” Zim gasped. “D-do that again! And keep rubbing!”

 

“Mmm?” He flicked his tongue against the edge and Zim squirmed more.

 

“Yeah… th-that!”

 

He continued, soon finding that he got the best reactions when he hummed and/or suckled on the tip, while massaging the base of the stalks with his thumbs. This recipe even managed to get Zim to unclasp his hands and grip the bed sheets beneath them, digging in while his body tensed and relaxed.

 

Shortly, Zim was sucking in air through clenched teeth and moaning between gasps.

 

“Oh, Dib!” He cried and shook his head. “Sss-stop!”

 

Dib halted instantly, alarm rushing through him. He opened his mouth, releasing the appendage. “Z-Zim?”

 

“J-just one… moment… I-I need…” Zim was still panting and moved his hands to the hem of his pants. With a quick movement, he shoved them down to his knees. Once freed, his large, purple penis stood shamelessly at attention, the tip already glistening as it peaked out of its foreskin.

 

“Oh… do you want to have s-” He stopped when Zim settled back against him.

 

“You may continue now, if you want.”

 

“Oh! Yeah, ok.”

 

Zim angled his antennae back towards Dib and the amber-eyed Irken took hold of the base of both again. This time he took the other antennae into his mouth and Zim let out a raspy moan.

 

Once again, Dib massaged the stalks, this time using a little longer of strokes to see how Zim liked that, or if he prefered short ones. Zim, however, had his eyes shut and his teeth bared again. As best as the Sweetling could tell, his boyfriend liked this as much, or at least it didn't seem to be ruining it for him.

 

“Oh, Diiib…” he moaned and squirmed against Dib, his claws were digging new holes into the sheets.

 

“Mmmmm,” Dib hummed against the part of the tip he had in his mouth.

 

“Oh! Ah!” Zim gasped and he tensed again. “M-more…!”

 

Dib obliged and his boyfriend released another moan. He rubbed the antennae faster and added just a little more pressure, seriously hoping it wouldn't hurt Zim.

 

“Oh-” Zim’s breath caught and he gasped.

 

Where words failed him, his hitching breath and the rappid flexing and unflexing of his body, his head pressing against Dib’s chest, made up for it and conveyed his enjoyment to the Sweetling. Dib turned his focus to Zim’s package, curious to see what it looked like when he came from this sort of stimulation.

 

All at once, Zim stopped breathing and his entire body flexed, then shuddered as he released. Three specific and separate squirts of cum erupted, the first more like extra precum, while the second was the strongest, and the last seemed more like it was just expelling the rest for good measure. As Zim collapsed back against him, Dib released his antennae and wrapped his arms around his green chest.

 

Zim wiped his chin and began licking his fingers while Dib watched.

 

“Did you… actually squirt on your chin?”

 

“Apparently,” Zim replied sounding a little sheepish and began wiping the drops from his chest and tummy and licking his fingers after gathering those until Dib grabbed his wrist and pulled Zim’s hand to his mouth before Zim could finish. He licked Zim’s fingers and the ruby-eyed Irken purred in approval. “Very nice, my Sweetling.”

 

“Thanks. And… how was it? Having your antennae played with like that?”

 

“Very nice.” He reached down and wiped the tip of his softening penis as well, then he turned and looked up at Dib. “Thank you.” He licked his finger clean.

 

“Of course, Zim.”

 

Dib smiled and leaned forward to kiss him. When he withdrew, it was in time to see Zim’s flaccid penis, and testes and scrotum, retreat inside his body and Dib’s antennae sprung up in surprise.

 

“How did you do that?!”

 

“Do what?”

 

“That! Your dick! It disappeared!”

 

Zim looked down and shrugged. “Oh, that. Yours should be able to as well, actually,” he replied.

 

“I don't think so. I mean, mine never does.”

 

“Mm, that’s because you have to consciously pull it inside. If you don't -” Zim extended his and let it rest. “- it just stays there. The only thing it does of its own accord is to come out when it’s hard and ready for mating.” He pulled his back inside.

 

“Guess I know what I’ll be practicing later,” Dib chuckled, though he knew he had a light blush on his cheeks. “But you’ll have to tell me how.”

 

“The same way you stick your tongue out and pull it back in, just with your penis.”

 

Dib stuck his tongue out and slowly drew it back into his mouth, then Zim crawled out of his lap and turned around to kiss him.

 

“Shall I help you now, my Sweetling?” He caressed Dib’s cheek, then traced a finger along one of Dib'S antennae suggestively.

 

Dib shrugged. “You don't need to. Unless you still actually want to have sex with me, I’m… fine.” He was. Though it had been fun to pleasure Zim and be able to make him squirm and even bring him to climax, he didn't feel particularly turned on.

 

Zim pursed his brow. “You’re really not turned on, are you?” Again Dib shrugged, feeling his blush deepen, and Zim scratched his chin. “Do you want to be? Or would you prefer to just cuddle?”

 

Another shrug. “Whatever you want.”

 

Zim frowned. “Dib, it’s about _you,_ not _me._ Zim is taken care of, - thank you for that - so you will have to tell me what  _ you _ want.”

 

Dib looked into the warm ruby eyes, searching them for a signal as to what was expected of him, however all he found was patient curiosity. “Well… is it bad if I just wanna cuddle?” He bit his lip and waited.

 

Zim gently caressed the side of his head. “Oh, Dib, you know that is the  _ worst _ thing ever,” he said with a giggle.

 

Still, Dib’s antennae drooped. “Sorry…”

 

“Oh, quit it. I was being sarcastic.” Zim settled down against the frame of the bed and pulled Dib into his lap.

 

“Oh… are you sure?” Dib asked in a pensive tone and picked up the charm that hung against his chest to fidget with it self-consciously.

 

Watching him, Zim picked up his own and touched the eye, which changed to amber for a moment and Zim smiled at it thoughtfully. “Yes, I’m positive.” He turned a warm grin towards Dib. “Cuddling you is nice.”

 

Dib smiled and laid his head against Zim’s shoulder, he turned his face to Zim’s neck and inhaled his scent.

 

 

“I love you, Zim.”

 

“I love you too, Dib.”

  
  
  


***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry these chapters are so short, it's just that I don't have a lot of filler for them.
> 
> Anyway, Nath there was actually inspired by these articles I've read about women who believe they have a ghost lover. There are even a few who got engaged. It's quite interesting and sex seems to play a role in all these accounts, and I got this idea from it.


	30. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phew, finally! Been having issues as I have an old, old netbook and it is sooooooo laggy. Also had problems getting it to connect to my internet. Just problems all around because it is so old and sloooooooow and... yeah.
> 
> Anyway, the chapter is FINALLY up. Again, sorry for the delay. This computer is really making things difficult.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

#  Chapter 28

  
  


The next day, he was feeling notably affectionate towards his ruby-eyed lover, thus, as the little Voot Cruiser flew on its way after they’d had a quick breakfast, Dib spent most of the trip cuddled up to Zim, wanting to be close and simply bask in the warm, even rather silly, feelings of being freshly in love. Zim did not appear to mind and kept an arm around Dib the entire time, his gloved fingers caressing the Sweetling’s shoulder.

 

Despite that, however, Dib’s anticipation for where they were going was high, and when they had finally stopped - a prudent distance from their destination - he could hardly contain his excitement. Or his nerves. This was it: The big mystery of what was actually in Area 51 would finally be solved! - If they were lucky.

 

Zim pulled up the holo display over the screen in the Voot Cruiser and tapped in a few commands. An aerial photo of Area 51 came on, showing only the ground, which looked mostly unremarkable except for some tyre tracks that seemed to disappear into nothing.

 

Zim made a few taps and swipes on the console and extracted a neon-green 3D image which showed a large, underground structure with multiple levels.

 

“Computer, identify the hyooman structure.”

 

_ “Insufficient information available.” _

 

Still, a number of words in irken popped up on the screen with lines indicating various points.

 

“Hmm…” Zim scratched his chin in thought. He tapped the green structure and rotated it, then pointed to a particular spot. “That is the main entrance and corresponds with the tracks.”

 

Dib nodded, having recognised it himself, but said nothing, for he was curious what his lover would do.

 

Zim turned to him. “I suppose you want to go inside.”

 

Dib again nodded. “Yeah. From out here, we’re not going to find out anything.”

 

Zim regarded him with a smirk. “I don't need to tell you it’ll probably be dangerous.”

 

Dib bit his lip, suddenly having his doubts. Despite having known that all along, now that Zim had put it into words, he felt uncertain about the whole thing. “Maybe we shouldn't… I don't want… anything to happen to you. Us.”

 

“But we came all this way to do exactly this,” Zim protested, taking his hand and holding it against his chest. “Come on, we’ve done far more dangerous things.” He grinned and winked.

 

“Yeah, but that was always to save the Earth… from  _ you, _ mostly,” he added with a wistful chuckle, then sobered up. “And we weren't…” Dib paused for a moment, then took Zim’s other hand and held it against his own chest. “We weren't  _ in love.” _

 

Zim leaned forward and kissed him. “Then I know you won't betray our truce this time.”

 

“Huh? I never…” Dib looked down, thinking about the other times they had and how he had indeed been the one to end their truces without any warning, because he’d always taken the opportunity presented to beat his rival. “I’m sorry.”

 

Zim made a dismissive gesture. “You can make it up to me later -” He traced his gloved thumb over Dib’s lips. “- On your knees, all naked and  _ begging _ for forgiveness like an obedient little Sweetling.” He licked his lips while Dib blushed.

 

“I guess…” Dib said with a sigh, though he really didn't see how sexual favours could even remotely make up for his past underhandedness.

 

Zim popped the top of the cruiser. “Anyway, I have a plan! So, are you coming or am I going inside by myself?”

 

Dib’s head snapped up to see Zim crawling out of the Cruiser. There was NO way he was letting his boyfriend do this alone and scrambled after, stumbling in his haste and landing in the dirt on hands and knees before Zim.

 

“Yes, that is the position.”

 

Dib looked up to see Zim standing with his hands on his hips, grinning down at him predatorily. “Just shut up,” he grumbled, blushing as he pulled himself to his feet and dusted himself off.

 

“First, an exercise,” Zim announced.

 

“Oh? What kind-” his words were cut off as Zim’s PAK legs shot out without warning and he had to jump to the side to avoid the sharp points. However Zim followed him and one went for his face, which Dib managed to dodge with a move of his head. Two more attacked and Dib had to scramble backwards as one hit the ground right where his left foot had been.

 

Zim raised up on his PAK legs and was upon Dib in an instant. Right as the ruby-eyed Irken raised two and shot them forward, Dib’s own spider-legs sprung out from his PAK and blocked. He quickly caught on to the point of the exercise and pointed them at Zim.

 

Zim dropped to the ground and attacked again, each shooting out with lightning speed, and Dib just as swiftly blocked each. While he seemed to be able to hold his own, he was unable to gain an advantage on the highly-trained Irken.

 

Then all at once, Zim forced an advantage and, when Dib stumbled backwards and landed hard on his butt, Zim pinned his PAK legs. “Enough!” he barked and Dib, now panting, relaxed his. “You’re alert now.” Zim kissed him.

 

Dib blinked up at him and nodded. “But… out of… breath… damn you...”

 

Their spider-legs retreated back into their PAK’s and Zim knelt down on one knee before Dib.

 

“You’ll have plenty of time to catch it while I explain the plan to you,” Zim said dismissively and reached to help Dib to his feet.

  
  
  


***

  
  


There had been far less ‘explaining’ the plan and far more forcing Dib into a new disguise that he really didn’t think he liked, however, and now the amber-eyed irken was ready to raise a fit.

 

“This is  _ stupid!” _

 

“It is  _ GENIUS!” _

 

“This will  _ never _ work!”

 

“If you’d hold still, it _will!”_ Zim had a grip on his chin and was drawing on his face as Dib was kneeling back in the dirt in front of him.

 

“Why do you even  _ have _ makeup anyway??” Dib couldn't help whining at Zim, who was standing on his knees so he was at eye-level with the taller Irken.

 

“Because your hyooman females wear it, so when I’ve needed to disguise myself as one, I had to have makeup.”

 

“I’m not even going to ask why you ever thought you’d need to disguise yourself as a woman,” Dib grumbled, then sighed, closing his eyes as Zim applied eyeshadow. “Anyway, so we’re just going to walk up to the gate dressed as women and…  _ what _ exactly again?”

 

“We march on in using our MIGHTY FEMININE POWERS!”

 

“This will never work!”

 

“The  _ other _ option was to take you in and hand you over to them as my captured alien scum!”

 

“I almost like that  _ better _ than this!”

 

Zim leaned in and gave him a quick peck on the lips. “I’d  _ still _ make you wear the dress! - Now shut up so I can paint your lips.” 

 

Though he shot his boyfriend a nasty glare, Dib obediently closed his mouth while Zim began applying lip-liner. 

 

His only consolation was that he wasn't the  _ only one _ dressed up, for the ruby-eyed Irken was wearing a rosy pink, long-sleeved dress, while he had a matching blue one, and their short, tight, but slitted, skirts stopped just above the knee. Along with the dresses, they wore their black uniform gloves with the dress sleeves pulled over them; completing the look was their, also black, knee-high uniform boots.   
  
Dib was certain he was going to die of embarrassment and wasn't sure which was worse out of the short skirt and the deep v-neck that showed far more of his chest than he would ever be comfortable with.

 

“This isn't going to work without boobs,” was all he could manage to say as he studied himself and Zim, who was now busy doing his own makeup.

  
“Boobs don't make the woman,” Zim stated sassily, clearly quoting something, though Dib couldn't quite place it. “Besides, your most athletic of females don't have any.” He paused to fill in his lips, then added in an airy tone, “but, if you  _ really _ want to wear a bra soooo badly, I’m  _ sure _ I can-”   
  


“NO!” Dib exploded, shaking his head as hard as he could.

 

Zim giggled and resumed his work while Dib worried at his eyelashes with his fingertips. They were fake, of course, since the two Irkens had absolutely none to start with, and felt very strange to Dib.

 

He finally resigned himself to his fate with the thought that just perhaps his boyfriend was secretly fulfilling a strange little fetish with all this and Dib may as well do him that favour of humouring him after everything Zim had been doing for him.

 

“Earth to Dib?” Zim giggled as he tapped Dib’s head to get his attention. “Now, how amazing does Zim’s disguise look?”

 

Dib looked up and blinked, for the Irken had managed to match his makeup to his green skin in a way Dib found surprisingly tasteful, and pink lipstick that matched his dress, with smokey pink eyes that worked well with the violet of the contacts, plus a dusting of pink glitter on his cheeks to finish the look.

 

“Huh. I didn’t know you were so into women’s fashion,” he teased, smirking knowingly at Zim. “What does mine look like?”

 

“Have a look.” Zim smugly handed him the mirror he'd used while applying his own makeup.

 

As with Zim’s, Dib’s own makeup was equally tastefully done, with smokey blue and silver eyeshadow that matched his dress and, for his lips, Zim had chosen at least two shades of dark blue as far as Dib could tell and his cheeks sparkled with blue glitter.

 

“Yuck. Are you sure glitter is a good idea?”

 

“Glitter is  _ always _ a good idea, my Dib.”

 

“You realise this is anything but discreet, right?”

 

“The point is that they notice  _ Rosa _ and  _ Azura _ and  _ don't _ notice  _ Zim _ and  _ Dib,” _ Zim replied.

 

“Oh. Ok.” Dib had absolutely no idea what to think about Zim’s plan, it was too much to take in all at once.

 

Zim gave him a critical look and scratched the base of his antennae thoughtfully. 

 

Finally, Zim produced a brown women's wig, which he placed on Dib’s head, then placed a platinum blonde one, which had the tips dyed black - on his own head. Zim’s hair was short, parted on the side with the bangs swept over his forehead to the opposite side, and gave him a rather sassy appearance and Dib honestky wasn't sure what he thought of the overall look of his boyfriend.

 

Zim caught him looking and grinned seductively. “See something you like, Babe?” he asked in an overly sugary and feminine voice while batting his fake eyelashes.

 

After a moment of assessing Zim’s appearance, Dib shrugged. “Well… I sure don't think I’m  _ straight.” _

 

Zim blinked. “Straight?”

 

Dib looked down and fidgeted with his entirely too deep collar, then looked back up. “I don't think I've ever found you  _ less _ appealing than I do now…” he admitted, then quickly looked away. “No offense…” he added, though didn't expect it to make much difference.

 

“Oh,” Zim said, then moved into his line of sight. “That’s good, because the goal is to actually keep these dresses  _ on _ for a while.”

 

Dib blinked, then smiled a little. “So… you’re not offended that I don't wanna… jump on you right now?”

 

Zim shook his head. “This is  _ not _ Zim’s most sexy outfit, but… I think it  _ will _ please the hyooman males sufficiently,” he said with an airy tone of dismissal, waving his hand to punctuate it.

 

Dib looked off to the side. “Unless they’re  _ gay…” _

 

“You cannot please  _ everyone _ at once,” Zim purred and took hold of Dib’s chin, tilting it so Dib had to look at him. “Anyway, the ‘gay’ men, as you call them, will still be fooled by our so very  _ ingenious _ disguises!”

 

Dib sighed, but smiled a little, then closed his eyes as Zim’s thumb brushed over his lips.

 

“And as for you being straight or not, I believe we have already established that it doesn't even matter. You like the mighty and beautiful genius that is called ZIM and that’s  _ all _ that matters.” Then Zim leaned in and gave him a kiss. “Now, let’s go break in and unravel ALL the dirty secrets the Earth and its hyoomans have for the unravelling!”

 

Dib nodded and straightened up, then thought of something. “Don't you think I’m too  _ tall _ for a woman?”

 

Zim’s eye roll was so loud, one could've gone deaf from it, and Dib blushed.

 

“Ask your sister.”

 

With a few touch-ups, mostly Zim wiping Dib’s dress of any dirt - and probably just an excuse to smack his butt multiple times, Dib figured - the two began on their way towards their destination.

  
  


***

  
  


“I  _ told _ you,” Zim began with a smug tone after they had weaselled their way past the guard at the entrance and now started walking down a sterile looking hallway with a few doors on either side, their boots clicking on the hard, enameled floor. “I’ve only been doing this for  _ centuries, _ you know.”

 

Dib halted and blinked. “Centuries?” He hurried and caught back up with his proudly strutting companion. “You said you were one-hundred sixty-three,” he whispered harshly into Zim’s earhole.

 

“Decades then, whatever,” Zim replied dismissively. “Either way, I got us inside, didn't I? And it was a piece of cake, no?”

 

To that Dib nodded. Getting INTO the building had been far easier than he would've dared to dream in even his wildest dreams. Not even the lack of boobs had gotten them any suspicious looks, despite that their low cut collars certainly attracted enough attention to the area - and where Dib’s chest was already close to most people’s eye level, the men they walked past made even less eye-contact with him than they did Zim. Dib honestly wondered how women could stand it.

 

“I can't believe these things worked…” Dib muttered after a few minutes, fumbling with the name tag Zim had made for ‘Azura’ and now hung from his neck. 

 

In fact, they hadn't attracted even the slightest bit of attention with them, a fact that was especially astounding to Dib, given that neither of them had known what ID tags for Area 51 looked like.

  
  


Zim smirked proudly. “Of course they do! Cower before the mad skills of  Z- Rosa!” 

 

Dib sighed and nodded. Either way, he was grateful it had worked and he didn't complain as Zim ushered him around a corner and to an elevator.

 

“I suppose we want to go  _ down,” _ Zim considered as they stood before the doors.

 

“Yeah. There isn't much of interest up here.”

 

“There is absolutely  _ nothing _ of interest up here,” Zim corrected him and pressed the button to summon the car. “And I don't suppose  _ ‘up’ _ is of any remarkable interest either.”

 

“I don't think there  _ is _ an ‘up’,” Dib remarked, turning his gaze towards the ceiling.

 

“There is definitely an ‘up’, Miss Azura,” Zim said. “And even if it’s only the roof.”

 

The doors opened and the two stepped into the elevator car.

 

“And what level should we start with?” Dib asked as they regarded the panel of buttons.

 

“How about the bottom and make our way up? Although the very bottom is probably just storage.” Zim pressed it anyway. “The storage is always a good place to look.”

 

“Ok…” Though Dib certainly had his doubts about that and, as the car descended with increasing speed, he added in a sarcastic tone, “expecting them to be  _ storing _ the aliens, or what?”

 

“Why not?  _ I _ would - do - have.”

 

Dib glared at the shorter irken. “Right,” he grumbled, remembering exactly how the former invader always seemed to have a stock of test subjects. “You little monster,” he grumbled under his breath.

 

Whether Zim had just not heard or whether he just refused to acknowledge it, he didn't indicate, only remaining silent as they descended into the bowels of Area 51.

  
  


***

  
  


When the car slowed to a halt and the doors finally opened, Dib’s mouth fell open at the sight they were greeted with. Both humans and  _ aliens _ were bustling about with whatever business they had. Some bent over tables with various objects, some holding clipboards, and all seemed to be working together as though this was the most normal thing in the universe.

 

“This… doesn't look like a storage room,” Dib murmured aloud without thinking.

 

“Oh, that’s because it’s not,” one of the aliens suddenly spoke up, approaching them and carrying some kind of metal box. He blinked at them a few times, his eyelids clear and closed vertically. “Uh, of course you two ladies want to see my boss over there. - He just got here a couple days ago." Then he hurried past them into the elevator and he hastily ushered them out. "Sorry, I gotta go! Sensitive, uh… you know!"

 

The alien they’d been directed to was bent over a table with some large sheet of paper stretched out over it, he looked up in irritation, then blinked as well when he noticed them. “A-ha,” he said as he straightened up and walked over to them, his knees bent backwards and he stood on his toes. He looked them up and down, then placed his hands on his hips. “Wow.” He shook his head. “I've always been told Irken disguises are a mix of ingenious and ridiculous, but I had no idea how true that was."

  
  


***


	31. Chapter 29

#  Chapter 29

  
  


"I don't know what you're talking about!” Zim snapped, not even trying to sound female anymore. “These are pure genius!” Then he seemed to catch himself. “Er, I mean, we are perfectly normal hyooman women!" He fingered his low-collar and batted his eyelashes. "You like, yes? But what are these... 'Irkens' you speak of?"

  
Dib, both mortified by the situation and astounded to see even more aliens (ones he also could  _ see _ this time), shot Zim a glare. "Oh, real smooth, Spaceb- girl,” he admonished his companion.

  
The alien’s laughter cut in. "So, you two are still fighting, I see.” He clicked his tongue and chuckled at them. “Ah, young lovers. Very beautiful.”

 

“Huh?” Dib said in confusion.

 

Zim, however, glared up at the alien. "What are you doing here?!” he demanded, again dropping the feminine voice. “Do you want the Irken Empire-"

 

“Relax, Invader,” the alien broke in. “Actually, I’m quite pleased to see that this was your destination instead of that silly con.” Then he turned and beckoned them. “If you’ll follow me, please.”

 

“Wait…” Dib grabbed Zim’s arm and addressed the alien. “Con? How do you know about that? I mean, you seem to know us, how can that be?”

 

The alien turned back around. “Don't you two recognise me?” He smirked.

 

“I recognise your voice,” Zim answered, his tone suspicious.

 

“Let's just say I’m glad to see your ‘costumes’ weren't damaged in the rain,” the alien said winking.

 

“Costumes? Rain?” Dib repeated, something picking at his memory, but he couldn't remember any  _ aliens. _

 

“I KNEW it!” Zim exclaimed and, shrugging Dib off, strode up to him. “YOU! What happened to your horns?!” he demanded.

 

“Horns?” the alien repeated, looking decidedly confused.

 

“Did you cut them off? Or is that a poor excuse for a disguise to fool the hyoomans,  _ Vortian?!” _

 

The alien looked nonplussed. “Vortian? I’m not a-” he shook his head. “Forget it. Would you just take a look at this?” He walked over to a table and began to unroll a large paper. “I think it’s important.”

 

Zim, however, was not done and followed him. “How did you get here?”

 

“The same way you did, Invader: by spaceship,” he answered impatiently. “We crashed here decades ago and these nice Terrans have agreed to let us stay here while we try to repair our spaceship in return for-”

 

“A likely story! Who sent you?!” Zim interrupted.

 

‘Decades?’ Dib wondered to himself.

 

The alien made a frustrated hissing sound and grumbled something in another language, which Dib could only make out the word ‘Irkens’.

 

Ignoring the two, Dib stepped up and looked at the paper, but it was in alien script and he didn't recognise it. “Um, what is this?” he asked.

 

The alien turned and smoothed it out. “Sorry, that’s a coffee stain.” He indicated a brown ring. “But this is very amazing!  _ Whatever _ it is.” He pointed to some text. “It’s written in a number of different languages, but we’ve determined parts of it are in irken.”

 

That seemed to catch Zim’s attention, for he stopped glaring at the alien and looked at the paper himself. “I’ll be the judge of that! Irken!” he scoffed as he shoved the alien aside. “Irk-Oh! Hmm… well, yes, this part  _ is _ irken,” he affirmed grudgingly. “But…” He bent down over it, trailing his gloved claw along one piece of text. “Huh. It seems to be a code…”

 

“That’s what we think. The pictures don't make any sense to us either.”

 

Zim moved to another block of text. “There are multiple languages and written in such a way that even irken translators, INCREDIBLE as they are,--”

 

Dib snorted and shook his head.

 

“--can't make sense of it…”

 

Dib walked around the table, staring at the pictures, then halted and blinked. He almost giggled and shook his head, certain he couldn't be right.

 

“Hey, Zim, if you look at it from this side, that piece --” he placed his gloved claw on it. “-- kinda looks like the Skydance Bridge back in OK.”

 

Zim looked at him with narrowed eyes. “Don't be ridic… u… lous…?” He cocked his head, then marched around to Dib. “No! Impossible! Why would anyone put that on h- wait…”

 

He hurried back over to the first side, drew his claw along one line of text, then turned to another without moving his hand and pointed to that, while mumbling something Dib couldn't decipher, but it looked like he was reading.

 

“Yes, yes… I recognise this…” Zim said, then moved to another. “It’s hard to decipher, but it… seems…” He read some more, his voice turning urgent as he read faster. “Oh, get out of my way, you two, move aside!” The two scrambled as he hurried around the table erratically, the alien notably more graceful on his digitigrade feet and backwards knees than Dib, who nearly tripped over his own.

 

“Did you find something?” he asked when he’d stabilised himself again.

 

“I can’t make it all out… Poor writing… That just makes no sense… That is insane… This-” Suddenly, he stopped and his antennae snapped up so hard they threw off his blond wig. “NO!” he snarled. “They can't be- They wouldn't  _ dare..!” _

 

“What??” Dib cried in alarm.

 

“NO! We are too MIGHTY!” Zim slammed his fists down on the table. “But…”

 

“Zim, what is it? Who wouldn't dare??”

 

Zim stood up, dashed for his wig and hurriedly put it back on, then back to the table where he paused for a few moments, looking the paper carefully over. Then…

 

“We have to go,” he told Dib suddenly, his expression frantic and his gaze flitted around the room, then to the table, then back to Dib. “I have to get back to my base! I-I have to- Hurry!”

 

“But what IS it?!” Dib cried as he hurried over to him. “Is the Earth in trouble??”

 

Zim looked up, meeting his eyes, his expression dark with impending doom. “The whole UNIVERSE is in trouble, Dib.”

 

Dib’s blood ran cold. “It-Wha-How-OHMYGOD!”

 

“You!” Zim pointed to the alien. “What’s the quickest way out of here?!”

 

The alien turned. “Well, uh…” he then hurried to another desk and picked something up. He held up a disk. “It’s a transporter, it’ll take you wherever you want to go!” He looked at Dib. “Oh, don't worry, it’s safe and tested. Ask your invader.” He gestured to Zim.

 

“That makes me feel a lot better,” Dib grumbled.

 

Zim inspected it. “Eh… it’s safe. - NOW HURRY!”

 

The alien dropped it on the floor. “Just step onto it.” He demonstrated by stepping onto it himself.

 

Zim did, so Dib followed, and shortly felt himself dematerialising, first it was a pins and needles feeling and then disorientation, then full blackout, then the same in reverse as he rematerialised.

 

They looked around. This is was NOT outside, nor anywhere near Zim’s Voot. They were in another room, with many humans who halted in their bustling about to look at them in surprise.

 

“Whoops, wrong one! - Hey, sorry, Guys! Just passing through!” the alien said quickly.

 

It lit up and rinse and repeat and they materialised on a table to the sound of a coffee cup clattering to the floor. They were standing on a desk before a surprised human.

 

“Oh, sorry, I just wanted to… I was using it as a paper weight, I didn’t know you were going to transport here,” he said sheepishly.

 

“We transport all the time, Mr. B, these are not paper weights!” The alien shouted. “When we’re gone, put it back on the floor!”

 

“Sorry again!”

 

With that, they dematerialised again and rematerialized in fresh air and wind. It caught Dib by surprise so much so that he stumbled forward only to realise too late that they were standing on the edge of a tall building and there was nothing to step or catch himself on. He lunged forward with a scream and shut his eyes tight.

 

But the free fall never happened and when he opened his eyes, the ground was not getting any closer. A moment later, he was pulled backwards and back onto the building a safe distance from the edge, then he suddenly did fall. The entire two feet to the roof.

 

“Huh?” He looked around to see who had rescued him, but Zim and the alien where both still standing together on a small disc now three metres from him and his boyfriend had his arms folded. “How-” It was then that he caught sight of the metal leg in the corner of his eye. In that moment, he realised all four of his PAK legs were out and spread about him like a large, four-legged spider and keeping him stable on his own two fleshy feet. Once he had a sure standing, and his legs stopped quivering, they retracted back into his PAK.

 

He carefully made his way way back over to the other two, looking at Zim questioningly.

 

“You are done playing around, yes?” Zim asked rudely. “We can get on our way? Or do you want to want to try that again?”

 

Dib stopped a metre and a half before them and glared at his boyfriend. “I wasn't playing around! I almost fell to my  _ death,  _ if you care!”

 

Without a word, Zim closed the distance between them, grabbed Dib by the arm, and parched him back over to the disc. “Do you even know where any of these go?!” he snapped at the alien.

 

“Well… I actually didn't know we placed one  _ here. _ I wonder why we did that…?”

 

“Yes, yes, fascinating mystery. Just take us back to Area 51.” Zim hissed.

 

“Where is--”

 

With that, they dematerialised and rematerialised where they had started.

 

“--Here,” Dib finished once they were standing back in the lab. Suddenly he was yanked by Zim and stumbled after him.

 

“We will find our  _ own _ way out of this…  _ place!” _ Zim growled. “Before you land us on the planet Guarven next!”

 

“Guarven?” Dib began as he hurried along to the elevators.

 

The alien caught up with them in three of his steps. “Wait! Will you tell us what it says?”

 

Zim pulled Dib into the elevator. “No time!”

 

“Well, send it to us when you do, ok?”

 

Zim punched the button to close the doors. “Don't hold your breath.”

 

When the doors closed and the car started on its way up, Dib turned to Zim. “Well, that wasn't very nice of y-”

 

Zim held his finger up. “Be quiet, Dib, I’m thinking!”

 

Dib growled, but otherwise did as told.

 

Once the doors opened again, Zim grabbed his arm and hurried him out, shortly they were jogging to the front. They ran past various surprised humans and Zim burst out through the doors. Once outside, he stopped and grabbed Dib around around the waist.

 

“Hang on tight!”

 

Dib wrapped his arms around Zim’s neck. “Zim, what-”

 

His words were cut off as they raised into the air and lurched forward at a maddening speed. Once he got over his surprise and his stomach- ‘spooch caught up with them, he looked and saw Zim’s PAK was open and the spider-legs were running,  _ racing _ over the ground and he clung tighter even though Zim’s hold was strong and secure.

 

With the wind in his wig, Dib idly wondered over how it didn't fall off.

 

‘Now just don't move your antennae,’ he silently ordered himself as they flew along the ground towards Zim’s ship.

  
  


In no time, they found it and scrambled into the Voot Cruiser, then before Dib had even settled into his seat, Zim’s hands began to fly over the controls and the ship rose from the ground.

 

_ “All systems operationa-” _

 

“JUST MOVE IT!” Zim interrupted the computer. “We have NO TIME!”

 

With that, the ship rose a metre off the ground and began flying along towards the road. Frowning, Zim touched a control and they lurched up into the sky and zoomed forward.

 

“Ok,  _ now _ will you tell me what’s going on?!” Dib demanded. “What are we doing?!?”

 

“We are flying back to my base!”

 

“What did the thing say?? How is the entire universe in danger?? Zim, damnit!”

 

“Dib, I can't explain right now, I need to  _ think! _ And we  _ must _ return to my base to make a very urgent call!”

  
  
  
  


***

**Author's Note:**

> The characters belong to Jhonen Vasquez, unless otherwise mentioned.
> 
> I appreciate R&R! Including comments, critique, questions, etc...
> 
> Artwork, updates, and such can be found over here:  
> https://www.deviantart.com/zadr-nir


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